Hello everyone I'm considering a job offer from a friend who owns an insurance agency. They have repeatedly asked me to come work for them. But, I have a felony record. The conviction was over 15 years ago, and competed all terms of the sentence more than a decade ago. It was for a non-violent, non-drug related, non-financial/fiduciary/moral turpitude crime.
I've checked the career opportunities on my friend's websit to find these available roles:

• Receptionist
• Office Representative
• Customer Relations Representative
• Account Associate

I'm trying to understand the legal boundary between administrative roles and roles that require a professional insurance license. I have reviewed the information on the state commissioner's sir, but I'm not clear on the following:

1. At what point does a person cross the line from performing administrative tasks to needing a professional insurance license to perform their role, according to Georgia professional licensure laws?
   
2. Given the specific past felony conviction scenario, would it be possible to obtain a professional insurance license in Georgia, if needed?
   

It's important to note that this conviction does not show up on a background check with a social security number (long story), but it does show up with fingerprints, which are required for licensure background checks. I'm concerned about disclosing this to my friend (they are fairly socially conservative), as it could potentially harm our friendship and could get out to our mutual circle of friends.
I've moved on with my life, and don't feel the need to disclose this information to my friends. Since the conviction, I've completed both undergraduate and graduate degrees, volunteered with civic engagement and advocacy organizations, including confounding one such organization and serving in leadership for 3 years. I have a professional job now. But, I'm looking for a better opportunity and work environment.
I'm seeking general advice and will consult with a legal professional for specific guidance, if necessary. Any insights or resources you can share to help me understand this better would be greatly appreciated.
Thank you in advance for your help.

If you're reading this, perhaps you're like me. You have most things you want in GTA Online. You've "done it all". And now you're bored.
But... have you *really* done it all? Turns out, most of us haven't. There's so much to do in this game, and it's easy to get stuck in old habits that prevent us from discovering everything there is to do in Los Santos!
So I began writing down all my ideas for having fun in the game, and basically use these suggestions as guidelines to always find something new to do. It has completely reinvigorated my joy for the game, and I hope it can help you do the same!
If you're having trouble with motivation or inspiration, then I suggest picking something at random from the list and just doing it! You might disccover that you love it, just like I did!
And if you have anything more to add, please share your comments so that we can all help build this list together. :)
​
Let's go!
​

• Break Your Habits: Most people have a routine that they repeat over and over again until they get burned out and bored with the game! Your number one goal for having fun must be to break your old habits!
• Grind Less: If you've played for a long time, there's absolutely zero reason to grind big piles of useless money. People often develop bad habits where they finally grind so much that they forget to have fun. The "wonder" of the world completely vanishes when everything becomes about optimal times and optimal routes and optimal mission rotations. Relax! Start exploring everything that the game has to offer instead! Dare to do the "less optimal" routes, and have the courage to stop stressing about the "time efficiency" when you do the game's content. Sure, perhaps you can do a mission in 2 minutes with an Oppressor Mk2, but why not relax, put on a podcast, and do a relaxing 5 minute drive instead? Relax and have fun!
• Switch Off the Business Mindset: Why grind at all? Why do businesses at all? What do you really need the money for, whatsoever? If it feels like grinding, do something else that's more fun for you! Stop thinking about the money and start thinking about the real-world fun you're having! Start actually enjoying all the things you've previously grinded for! Perhaps you might enjoy treating GTA as a racing simulator where you mostly do challenges/race maps instead? There's so much more to do that isn't purely related to earning money!
• Accept All Invites: When you see invites to races, challenges, missions, etc, accept them! You will broaden your horizons about what you can do in the game, and you will often make the newbies very happy! Of course, if it turns out they're a hopelessly stupid newbie who keeps dying and never improves, then sure, I'd suggest leaving the heist to save your time and sanity. But most of the time, the other players will be smart enough to learn quickly. You can easily make great, new friends this way!
• Protect the Newbies: If you see someone doing a sales mission in a public lobby, why not fly over there in a powerful airborne vehicle (or heck, a missile-equipped Toreador car), and then follow them as their bodyguard against any griefers that may appear!
• Join People's CEO/MC: You can list yourself as "looking for work" via the interaction menu, which will alert other people that there's someone looking for work in the session. You can then join them and help people out with their missions, which is often a fun and relaxing activity for a while!
• Get a Crew: Look around for a crew of like-minded people. They exist. There are crews that specialize in heisting with competent players. There are crews that focus on racing. There are crews for Arena War. There are crews that only do LS Car Meet challenges/races. There's even crews specialized in doing sales missions together, by helping each other with business sales, if that's your thing! Finding a group of people with a compatible mindset and interests really pays off in the end!
• Switch Sessions: You can jump between multiple public sessions until you find one that matches your mood. Perhaps a nice, quiet sessions without griefers, perfect for doing sales missions? Or maybe one where there's a group of people that are actively doing something fun, which you can join in on? Don't just settle for your session. Explore what's out there!
• Do the Stupid Things: Grab your friends or some randoms, and challenge each other to do the most stupid and random things you can think of. The game is a sandbox. So start acting like it! For example, why not challenge each other with things like "everyone starts at the beach without any vehicles, your goal is to get to the Senora Desert convenience store, and you're only allowed to use stolen vehicles, the first person to reach the desert wins", or how about "everyone jumps from the Maze Bank Tower and your goal is to ride your parachute all the way to the ferris wheel". Is that even possible? Who knows! Let's find out!
• Become a Map Creator: If you've had fun making random challenges in freeroam, why not make them into more formal challenges, by creating actual maps? The map creator is very advanced. You can modify the world, add checkpoints anywhere you want, you could make a bicycle race, add pedestrians, enable weapon wheel usage, add parachute jumps, stunt jumps, survival modes, etc. Go wild!
• River Racing: The game has two epic rivers that start at the "Alamo Sea" (desert lake) and head west out to the ocean. Why not do a race with some friends? Get the Blazer Aqua amphibious quad bike and start at the desert, then race through one of the rivers, which is full of fun jumps. Next, decide on a destination (such as the Del Perro Pier) and do the rest of the drive on roads to see who gets there first.
• Stop Flying: Whenever a game lets you fly, you end up skipping huge amounts of content and world design and just flying directly above it all. That's nice if you want to get somewhere efficiently, but it really breaks the game's immersion. Try driving everywhere instead!
• Learn to Fly: Many players are awful at flying (especially the helicopters). Why not practice your flying skills? Perhaps try landing your helicopter at very tight spots, on rooftops, and other fun locations!
• Use Motorcycles: They're more thrilling than cars, because crashing actually has consequences. They're also very fast and agile, which feels awesome while driving through the city!
• Oppressor MK1: Fly around the map, trying to create your own challenges such as flying over the water or climbing Mount Chiliad.
• Climb the Mountain: Find various fun vehicles and attempt to climb Mount Chiliad in them. There's lots of fun to be had with motorcycles at the mountain!
• BMX Tricks: There are so many skate parks and BMX bicycle stunt locations in the city. Why not look at some BMX stunt videos for inspiration?
• Throw Away the GPS: Stop staring at the minimap while driving! This is super fun. Let's say that you need to get to Simeon's shop. Instead of opening up the world map and setting a map marker and following the GPS line like a lemming, try to train yourself to navigate the city! Drive the streets, look at the surroundings and actually navigate! It's so much fun and you'll feel way more relaxed. The city will also feel way more immersive. You can even modify the minimap via "Settings: Display: Radar = Blips", which hides the map so that you can't see the shape of the streets by glancing at the minimap anymore. You can even disable it completely, but unfortunately it also hides the healthbar if you do that.
• Use First Person: You can change the game's camera mode to first person, which is a really unique and immersive way to play the game. Steal some cars and go cruising! It will feel like an entirely different game when you get used to it!
• Take Selfies: Find beautiful locations and attempt to take great screenshots, with perfect framing and composition! You can use the game's built-in snapmatic camera, or you can use your regular screenshot key instead! Collecting photos of your adventures is a nice way to remember where you've been!
• Businesses: There are so many businesses in the game, and it's easy to forget about them after a while. Look at your businesses and begin doing their sourcing and sales missons again! Most of us quit them because they're very grindy, but after a long time away from them, they'll feel fresh again. And they'll feel much more relaxing if you vary between your different businesses and you only do one or two missions at a time, to never get bored.
• Nightclub: Do the promotion/popularity missions, which involve going around town and promoting the nightclub, or helping to remove unwanted or drunk guests from the club. All of that improves your popularity, which improves the passive income you're earning from the club!
• Get the DJs: The nightclub has multiple DJs. Why not unlock them all? Their missions are very fun, and you'll earn new music for your club.
• Bunker: Why not do some manual supply missions, just to relax and have fun? Sure, the optimal way to make money with the bunker is to buy the supplies and do "better" things with your time instead of sourcing supplies, but why does everything have to be about ultimate efficiency all the time? If you're a long-time player, you already have lots of money and you need new things to do!
• Contact Missions: So many people don't even know that you can get missions by calling NPCs on the phone. It's named "contact missions" and they can be very fun. I recommend calling Dax and doing "Request Work" from him, because his missions are very varied and after you've done enough you get various important rewards, such as upgrades for your Acid Lab business.
• CEO/VIP Work: When you're a CEO, you can start SecuroServ missions via the interaction menu. There's lots of fun ones! For example, why not get your favorite car, relax and do the Sightseer mission, seeing where the map markers will take you while you enjoy the relaxing drive? The mission gives you 15 minutes, which is plenty of time to take the scenic route.
• Terrorbyte Missions: Another forgotten relic! The terrorbyte has lots of fun missions which are very good for variation. They used to be the best "active" way to earn money in GTA. Most players who grinded those missions have only done the "optimal rotation", but how about actually doing all of the available missions for fun?
• Rockstar Jobs: There are so many high-quality maps, races and challenge modes in the game. Explore the official list of RockstaCurated jobs in the game's pause menu. There's a ton of them!
• Community Jobs: There's a ton of cool community maps in the game. Remember to favorite the ones you liked so that you can easily start the same again!
• Auto Shop: Do the customer car customization and delivery jobs, and do the heists! They can be done solo.
• MC Club: Do the customer motorcycle customization and delivery jobs.
• Vehicle Warehouse: Do the Import/Export car theft and sales missions. Be sure to use the trick that ensures you only get high-end cars (permanently fill the warehouse with every worthless sourced car in the game, then you will only get high-end cars after that).
• Acid Lab: The best passive income business in the game. Spend some time doing Dax's contact missions to fully upgrade your lab's efficiency and it will become very profitable. Then mix up your gameplay between both sourcing Acid supplies or buying them. And do the sales missions.
• Franklin's Agency: Do the Dr. Dre story missions, then do 201x Security Contract missions until you've unlocked the highest amount of passive daily income (it goes up by $100 every time you do a mission, capped at $20,000 after having done 201 contracts).
• Payphone Hits: They're unlocked after doing at least 3 Security Contract missions. Then you can pick up assassination contracts from ringing payphones. They're very profitable.
• Weekly Time Trials: Do the camotorcycle time trial and the RC car time trial every week, they're a good way to learn how to drive and they give a nice bit of money! Remember that you can hold a key to respawn at the start of the race before the time has ended, if you're sure that you won't make it in time.
• Daily Objectives: In your interaction menu, look at the Objectives and complete them. They're a good way to be inspired to do things you might not do otherwise.
• Daily Collectible Hunts: G's Cache (hunt for the hidden street cache), Kosatka submarine treasure hunt, Street dealer (find it and sell to it every day), etc.
• Get a Fresh Look: Create a new character outfit (clothes, hairstyle, tattoos, mask).
• Use Different Weapons: Challenge yourself to use different weapons than the same old, boring weapon you always use. For example, how about only using the Heavy Revolver? Make those shots count!
• Modify Your Weapons: Change their styles and attachments.
• Tune Your Precious Car: You might have a "perfectly tuned" car that you've been driving for years and that you're always using. Why not modify it a bit? Put a different livery on it, and some different colors at least? What felt "fresh" two years ago would just be contributing to a feeling of "staleness" today. Freshen things up!
• Ride of the Day: Most long-time players have around a hundred vehicles, but most of them collect dust. Why not set fun "challenge" rules for yourself, such as randomly selecting a vehicle and using only that vehicle on that real-life day?
• Outfit of the Day: Why not make it your goal to create a new character "outfit of the day" (or week) whenever you log in? It's a great way to get a fresh feeling every time you play!
• Minigames: How about some Golf, Tennis, Darts or Arm Wrestling?
• Gang Attacks: Find a gang and eliminate them!
• Stash Houses: Find the stash houses and raid them for resources for your businesses.
• Parachute: Go somewhere high up and do a parachute dive! Better yet, look for the Junk Energy Skydives challenges on the map, or do Dom's parachute challenge (which is a special skydive at a random location).
• San Andreas Flight School: Do the flight school challenges! They're at the Los Santos Airport, at the airplane icon!
• Gun Range Challenges: Complete the Bunker's and Ammo-Nation Gun Range shooting challenges!
• Gun Range with Friends: Challenge a friend to the gun range mini-games, where you compete to see who is the most accurate!
• MC Club Missions: Form a MC club with at least one friend, then ride in formation and start MC missions via the interaction menu.
• MC Businesses: Yes, they're the most hated businesses in the game, but why not do them a little bit? You could do a little bit of supplying and a few small sales missions, to ensure that you have small sales. Or, team up with friends and take turns helping each other do larger sales.
• Racing: Do Open Wheel, Stunt Races, Transform Races, and Regular Races. There are so many different kinds of races in the game! The transform races are the newest feature, and are very cool, since you might drive a supercar down the street to the airport, then transform into a plane and fly through the sky, and other epic things, all in the same race map!
• LS Car Meet: Do the challenges, races and rank up your LS Car Meet rank. Try to win the Prize Ride!
• Lobby Car Meets: You can try arranging car meets with other people in the lobby, to check out each other's cars! Just beware of griefers. You may want to do it in the LS Car Meet building to avoid the griefer explosions, or just switch to a lobby with cooler people.
• Arcade: Play the arcade games and try to beat them! Some of them have hidden rewards for completing the game or completing certain challenges.
• Achievements: Look at the pause menu's Stats - Awards section, and pick some award that you'll try to complete! There are so many fun challenges in there, such as attempting to parachute for more than 3 minutes, or robbing every store on the map (you can see the checkmarks on the map to know if you've robbed those stores).
• Stunt Jumps: There are 50 stunt jump locations on the map, which unlock a few rewards and are also really fun to complete!
• Unlock Vehicle Colors: You may have noticed that certain colors are locked behind challenges, such as winning a certain amount of races. Why not finally unlock those colors you've always wanted but were always "too lazy" to unlock? You'll get to enjoy some flashy, new vehicle colors!
• Arena War: Very fun, but unfortunately hard to get a group going for it. But if you can get a group, Arena War is super fun.
• Freemode Battles: Join a large lobby and just do whatever you want while you're waiting for freemode battles, which start every 20 minutes and will alternate between Business Battles and Freemode Challenges. Then attempt to win those battles! Events will only trigger when there are at least 4 players outdoors, and they cannot be in the same CEO/MC.
• Ride with Strangers: Pick your nicest car and then drive around and invite strangers to either ride with you or do impromptu street race 1v1 challenges.
• Freemode Map Markers: Look at the map. There are icons and glowing markers everywhere on the map/streets. Visit whichever icon is nearest your current location and see what's there! Remember that you can go "On Call" (queue) for public races/missions while you're waiting for them to fill up, which lets you stay in Freemode while you're waiting.
• Weekly Bonuses: Look at the Rockstar Newswire to see what the weekly bonus money is, and focus on doing that business/event for a while, to earn some money!
• Max Your Stats: Get all your stats to maximum! Most people haven't finished Strength, which can be gradually maxed for fun by simply punching every civilian you see.
• Invade the Military: Invade the military base at Fort Zancudo with some friends, and make it your mission to steal a Lazer jet plane.
• Heists: Do some heist preps or full heists for fun! Many of them can be casually setup while solo, which is very relaxing! Most of the newer heists can even be completed while solo!
• Change Your Heist Routes: You don't have to always do the same approach over and over again. Most heists have a lot of different approaches. For example, have you ever successfully completed the "Silent and Sneaky" approach at the Casino? Start exploring the different possibilities out there!
• Yellow Mission Markers: The yellow letters/markers on the map show the location of significant storyline missions (such as ULP, Agency, Acid Lab, etc). Visit those locations and start completing the stories that GTA Online has to offer!
• Do the Jobs: Go to "Online - Jobs" in the pause menu, and explore the available options!
• Answer the Calls: There are so many fun missions for English Dave, the various DJs at the Music Locker, the Casino staff, etc. In most cases, you'll also get some kind of reward if you finish them all! You might even get them to stop calling you when you've finished everything, which is a nice reward in itself!
• Check Your Texts/Emails: There's a lot of "mini missions" that arrive via emails/text messages. For example, Simeon asks you to steal certain cars every day. There's also an early game treasure hunt which starts through an email.
• Use Quick Join: There's an app on your phone named "Quick Join". It queues you for a rapid, random job. It's a great way to explore new content, meet new people and to help them with the queues for their own missions.
• Browse the Internet: There are a ton of funny parody websites in GTA Online's internet browser. Explore what's out there!
• Watch TV/Movies: Have you seen all the TV shows and cinema movies yet? If not, relax and have some fun! :)
• Customize Your Phone: You can change the theme, background, ringtone and other settings for your in-game phone. Why not change things a bit?
• Don't Be Annoyed: The phone calls and missions may seem annoying, but try actually relaxing and doing them. Listen to the phone calls. Call the NPCs. Do their missions! They are pretty nice and chill activities which gives you something to do in the game and some challenges.
• Use a Gamepad: If you're a PC player, you'll know that most of the game is too easy, since the aiming and enemy difficulty was balanced for console (gamepad) players. Try using a gamepad on PC! Not only will your driving and flying be massively improved, you'll also have a much more fun fun time when fighting enemies, since you can't just "360 No Scope" everything with your superior pointing device anymore. You'll even get immersive rumble that lets you feel the engine of your cars! How cool is that?! The game's options lets you finetune the sensitivity and aiming mode, and true professionals will use "Free Aim" which completely disables the auto-aiming.
• Meet Different People: If you're mostly a heist person, look for someone who loves cars and start hanging out with them to absorb some of their passion for another aspect of the game. You might learn to love car tuning too!
• Trade Prices: Many vehicles in the game have trade prices which give you a massive discount on the vehicle if you complete the challenge first. So set your eyes on a nice vehicle and do its challenges for fun! The discount you're earning will be like earning a huge sum of money that you put towards that specific vehicle. For example, a 2 million dollar discount on a vehicle you wanted is the same as if you had just earned 2 million dollars that you decided to spend on that vehicle! So don't sleep on the trade price discounts! They're a fun challenge with a very high monetary value!
• Bunker Research: If you have a bunker, try doing the research! You can unlock a ton of cool and super useful vehicle and weapon modifications! The explosive and incendiary ammo are must-haves.
• Mobile Operations Missions: The Mobile Operations Center is a forgotten business. It exists in your bunker, but you can request it via your Interaction Menu. Enter the truck's trailer, and then start missions from the computer in the command room!
• Avenger: Take your Avenger out for a drive! It's an extremely powerful, heavily armored aircraft and can be customized with various fun additions.
• Relaxing Yacht: Why not purchase or upgrade your yacht, and chill on it for a while with some friends? It even has lots of fun water vehicles parked in the water at the yacht, and helicopter pads for easy travel.
• Yacht Missions: You can start the fun "A Superyacht Life" mission series from the captain on your yacht. You'll even get a fun Yacht Captain outfit if you complete them all as host.
• Special Vehicle Work: The Vehicle Warehouse provides various epic missions whose "main" purpose is to unlock trade prices on various weaponized vehicles, but the missions themselves are fun too. Most players only do the specific missions for the vehicles they wanted to buy. Why not complete them all at least once, or play them again for fun?
• Collectibles: The map is full of collectible items, such as USB music sticks, playing cards, action figures, signal jammers (to unlock the best hacker for the Casino heist), etc. Why not relax and do them all for fun? They all unlock something fun or useful!
• Dream Vehicle: Relax, do some research about vehicles are available in the game, and set your eyes on a new "dream vehicle". Then work towards earning it and pimping it just the way you want it! Having a goal is fun!
• Test Drives: Check out the weekly test drives at the "Luxury Autos" shop, at Simeon's "Premium Deluxe Motorsport", and at the "LS Car Meet". You might find your new dream vehicle!
• Collect Vehicle Sets: You might have fun building specific collections, such as all Benny's vehicles in the game, etc. Setting goals for yourself about specific vehicle collections gives you something to strive for, and means that there's a lot of new things you'll need to buy and tune, which will keep you busy for a while!
• Sell Vehicles: Let's be honest, there are a lot of stinkers in your collection. Why not sell them? Just beware of the game's daily sell limit. The limit will be hit somewhere around 30-40 cars sold in 24 real-life hours. I'd suggest only selling 1-5 cars per real life day, which ensures that you'll never face the anger of Rockstar, and you'll have more time to make deliberate choices about which vehicles to get rid of. You'll also be getting roughly 50% of your previously spent money back for each sold vehicle! I'd recommend forcing yourself to drive a vehicle for a while before selling it, and looking at its customizations to see if you'd like it if you changed its style a bit, so that you're absolutely sure that you don't want it.
• Organize Your Vehicles: A lot of people have a complete mess in their garages. Why not begin sorting your cars, such as placing all your best cars at the premium display spots in your office garage? Perhaps organizing the floors by vehicle type? You can have lots of fun and you'll get a much better overview of your available vehicles.
• Relocate Yourself: If you've been staring at the same, old, boring spot for years, it could be fun to move! Most players choose the ugly, industrial, "optimal" locations. Why not relax and move to the beautiful beach instead? The Lombank office, the Insert Coin arcade, the Vespucci Beach MC clubhouse, the Del Perro Nightclub, the Strawberry auto shop, and the Vespucci Canals agency are all very beautiful locations with amazing interior and exterior design and great views! They're also very well placed for all of their business purposes!
• Browse in Person: When you're looking at real estate on the internet, things look very boring and impersonal. Why not take a drive around the city and look at the "real estate for sale" map markers in person? Perhaps you'll find a great new location for your home! However, if it's a multi-apartment house, I recommend checking YouTube for the various room views, to find the room with the best view before you buy it.
• Upgrade Your Properties/Businesses: If you haven't yet upgraded all of the equipment for a business, it's a great idea to upgrade it to improve its efficiency and safety. Or how about changing the interior design for fun, to replace the "same old daily view" with a fresh new look?
• Buy Every Arcade Machine: There are so many fun minigame machines for your arcade. Why not buy them all and pimp that place out? It's a nice place to relax, and even get some rewards for completing the games.
• Get All Passive Businesses: Why not work towards getting and fully upgrading all of the passive incomes in the game? Such as the Nightclub (which automatically generates money in the safe based on popularity, and generates MC business products to sell from its basement), the Acid Lab (which can be restocked with a simple phone call to Mutt, and has easy sales missions), the Arcade (which generates $5000 per in-game day when you've filled all of its interior slots with arcade machines, which can all be the same machine if you want), the Agency (which generates up to $20000 per in-game day based on how many Security Contracts you've completed), Street Dealers (finding the daily street dealer is much faster than regular sales missions, and they pay more than regular missions), Bunker (you can resupply it via one click with the Master Control Terminal in your Arcade, and then simply sell the product when it's still less than 25% full, thus guaranteeing a single sales vehicle every time). An added bonus of having passive businesses is the fact that they let you do other things in the game, such as doing racing and other fun challenges, while your businesses passively produce for you!
• Start Fresh: Did you know that your online account has two character slots? You can actually start fresh by simply withdrawing all of you banked money to your primary character, so that there's $0 in the bank. Then create a new character, which will begin at $0. Then relax and enjoy the ride of building a new empire. I suggest doing things differently this time. For example, if your primary character owns every business, why not just focus on a specific business this time, such as the CEO businesses (cargo crates), or just the vehicle warehouse, etc? Take this opportunity to simplify and avoid grinding, while still building a new playstyle to keep things fresh! Why not skip the Kosatka, so that you don't have the "easy Cayo Perico money" either? This slower, more deliberate, old-school way of making money will ensure that you have lots of fun, and you can set your own goals for what vehicles you want to save up money for on your new character! If you get tired of the grind, just switch back to your primary character again and enjoy the wealth. You can even delete your secondary character again to start fresh as many times as you want to.
• Spend Your Money: Having $100 million unused in the bank is just a completely pointless number, and is basically worth the same as having $0 in the bank if you aren't even using it. Unless your goal is to collect a specific amount of money for fun, I'd instead suggest that you actually start spending absolutely all of your money! Because if you can succeed in being perpetually slightly low on cash, you'll have much more reason to care about doing your businesses when you do want to buy something, which in turn drives your motivation to play again! Having a huge stash of money is bad for your motivation to play! Having a huge sash of money is like having an endless "Rich Daddy's Credit Card" in your wallet. Get rid of that credit card, buy a bunch of fun stuff, and enjoy the game more as a result!
• Play the Story: The vast majority of GTA Online players have barely touched the offline story. Why not relax with the story from time to time, gradually making your way through the epic offline story that started it all?
• Take a Break: If you're truly not finding any fun anymore, then take a break, perhaps a few weeks or a month is all you need to enjoy the game again! They also release content updates roughly twice per year, so you'll always have something new to return to in the future! :)

If you're reading this, perhaps you're like me. You have most things you want in GTA Online. You've "done it all". And now you're bored.
But... have you *really* done it all? Turns out, most of us haven't. There's so much to do in this game, and it's easy to get stuck in old habits that prevent us from discovering everything there is to do in Los Santos!
So I began writing down all my ideas for having fun in the game, and basically use these suggestions as guidelines to always find something new to do. It has completely reinvigorated my joy for the game, and I hope it can help you do the same!
If you're having trouble with motivation or inspiration, then I suggest picking something at random from the list and just doing it! You might disccover that you love it, just like I did!
And if you have anything more to add, please share your comments so that we can all help build this list together. :)
​
Let's go!
​

• Break Your Habits: Most people have a routine that they repeat over and over again until they get burned out and bored with the game! Your number one goal for having fun must be to break your old habits!
• Grind Less: If you've played for a long time, there's absolutely zero reason to grind big piles of useless money. People often develop bad habits where they finally grind so much that they forget to have fun. The "wonder" of the world completely vanishes when everything becomes about optimal times and optimal routes and optimal mission rotations. Relax! Start exploring everything that the game has to offer instead! Dare to do the "less optimal" routes, and have the courage to stop stressing about the "time efficiency" when you do the game's content. Sure, perhaps you can do a mission in 2 minutes with an Oppressor Mk2, but why not relax, put on a podcast, and do a relaxing 5 minute drive instead? Relax and have fun!
• Switch Off the Business Mindset: Why grind at all? Why do businesses at all? What do you really need the money for, whatsoever? If it feels like grinding, do something else that's more fun for you! Stop thinking about the money and start thinking about the real-world fun you're having! Start actually enjoying all the things you've previously grinded for! Perhaps you might enjoy treating GTA as a racing simulator where you mostly do challenges/race maps instead? There's so much more to do that isn't purely related to earning money!
• Accept All Invites: When you see invites to races, challenges, missions, etc, accept them! You will broaden your horizons about what you can do in the game, and you will often make the newbies very happy! Of course, if it turns out they're a hopelessly stupid newbie who keeps dying and never improves, then sure, I'd suggest leaving the heist to save your time and sanity. But most of the time, the other players will be smart enough to learn quickly. You can easily make great, new friends this way!
• Protect the Newbies: If you see someone doing a sales mission in a public lobby, why not fly over there in a powerful airborne vehicle (or heck, a missile-equipped Toreador car), and then follow them as their bodyguard against any griefers that may appear!
• Join People's CEO/MC: You can list yourself as "looking for work" via the interaction menu, which will alert other people that there's someone looking for work in the session. You can then join them and help people out with their missions, which is often a fun and relaxing activity for a while!
• Get a Crew: Look around for a crew of like-minded people. They exist. There are crews that specialize in heisting with competent players. There are crews that focus on racing. There are crews for Arena War. There are crews that only do LS Car Meet challenges/races. There's even crews specialized in doing sales missions together, by helping each other with business sales, if that's your thing! Finding a group of people with a compatible mindset and interests really pays off in the end!
• Switch Sessions: You can jump between multiple public sessions until you find one that matches your mood. Perhaps a nice, quiet sessions without griefers, perfect for doing sales missions? Or maybe one where there's a group of people that are actively doing something fun, which you can join in on? Don't just settle for your session. Explore what's out there!
• Do the Stupid Things: Grab your friends or some randoms, and challenge each other to do the most stupid and random things you can think of. The game is a sandbox. So start acting like it! For example, why not challenge each other with things like "everyone starts at the beach without any vehicles, your goal is to get to the Senora Desert convenience store, and you're only allowed to use stolen vehicles, the first person to reach the desert wins", or how about "everyone jumps from the Maze Bank Tower and your goal is to ride your parachute all the way to the ferris wheel". Is that even possible? Who knows! Let's find out!
• Become a Map Creator: If you've had fun making random challenges in freeroam, why not make them into more formal challenges, by creating actual maps? The map creator is very advanced. You can modify the world, add checkpoints anywhere you want, you could make a bicycle race, add pedestrians, enable weapon wheel usage, add parachute jumps, stunt jumps, survival modes, etc. Go wild!
• River Racing: The game has two epic rivers that start at the "Alamo Sea" (desert lake) and head west out to the ocean. Why not do a race with some friends? Get the Blazer Aqua amphibious quad bike and start at the desert, then race through one of the rivers, which is full of fun jumps. Next, decide on a destination (such as the Del Perro Pier) and do the rest of the drive on roads to see who gets there first.
• Stop Flying: Whenever a game lets you fly, you end up skipping huge amounts of content and world design and just flying directly above it all. That's nice if you want to get somewhere efficiently, but it really breaks the game's immersion. Try driving everywhere instead!
• Learn to Fly: Many players are awful at flying (especially the helicopters). Why not practice your flying skills? Perhaps try landing your helicopter at very tight spots, on rooftops, and other fun locations!
• Use Motorcycles: They're more thrilling than cars, because crashing actually has consequences. They're also very fast and agile, which feels awesome while driving through the city!
• Oppressor MK1: Fly around the map, trying to create your own challenges such as flying over the water or climbing Mount Chiliad.
• Climb the Mountain: Find various fun vehicles and attempt to climb Mount Chiliad in them. There's lots of fun to be had with motorcycles at the mountain!
• BMX Tricks: There are so many skate parks and BMX bicycle stunt locations in the city. Why not look at some BMX stunt videos for inspiration?
• Throw Away the GPS: Stop staring at the minimap while driving! This is super fun. Let's say that you need to get to Simeon's shop. Instead of opening up the world map and setting a map marker and following the GPS line like a lemming, try to train yourself to navigate the city! Drive the streets, look at the surroundings and actually navigate! It's so much fun and you'll feel way more relaxed. The city will also feel way more immersive. You can even modify the minimap via "Settings: Display: Radar = Blips", which hides the map so that you can't see the shape of the streets by glancing at the minimap anymore. You can even disable it completely, but unfortunately it also hides the healthbar if you do that.
• Use First Person: You can change the game's camera mode to first person, which is a really unique and immersive way to play the game. Steal some cars and go cruising! It will feel like an entirely different game when you get used to it!
• Take Selfies: Find beautiful locations and attempt to take great screenshots, with perfect framing and composition! You can use the game's built-in snapmatic camera, or you can use your regular screenshot key instead! Collecting photos of your adventures is a nice way to remember where you've been!
• Businesses: There are so many businesses in the game, and it's easy to forget about them after a while. Look at your businesses and begin doing their sourcing and sales missons again! Most of us quit them because they're very grindy, but after a long time away from them, they'll feel fresh again. And they'll feel much more relaxing if you vary between your different businesses and you only do one or two missions at a time, to never get bored.
• Nightclub: Do the promotion/popularity missions, which involve going around town and promoting the nightclub, or helping to remove unwanted or drunk guests from the club. All of that improves your popularity, which improves the passive income you're earning from the club!
• Get the DJs: The nightclub has multiple DJs. Why not unlock them all? Their missions are very fun, and you'll earn new music for your club.
• Bunker: Why not do some manual supply missions, just to relax and have fun? Sure, the optimal way to make money with the bunker is to buy the supplies and do "better" things with your time instead of sourcing supplies, but why does everything have to be about ultimate efficiency all the time? If you're a long-time player, you already have lots of money and you need new things to do!
• Contact Missions: So many people don't even know that you can get missions by calling NPCs on the phone. It's named "contact missions" and they can be very fun. I recommend calling Dax and doing "Request Work" from him, because his missions are very varied and after you've done enough you get various important rewards, such as upgrades for your Acid Lab business.
• CEO/VIP Work: When you're a CEO, you can start SecuroServ missions via the interaction menu. There's lots of fun ones! For example, why not get your favorite car, relax and do the Sightseer mission, seeing where the map markers will take you while you enjoy the relaxing drive? The mission gives you 15 minutes, which is plenty of time to take the scenic route.
• Terrorbyte Missions: Another forgotten relic! The terrorbyte has lots of fun missions which are very good for variation. They used to be the best "active" way to earn money in GTA. Most players who grinded those missions have only done the "optimal rotation", but how about actually doing all of the available missions for fun?
• Rockstar Jobs: There are so many high-quality maps, races and challenge modes in the game. Explore the official list of RockstaCurated jobs in the game's pause menu. There's a ton of them!
• Community Jobs: There's a ton of cool community maps in the game. Remember to favorite the ones you liked so that you can easily start the same again!
• Auto Shop: Do the customer car customization and delivery jobs, and do the heists! They can be done solo.
• MC Club: Do the customer motorcycle customization and delivery jobs.
• Vehicle Warehouse: Do the Import/Export car theft and sales missions. Be sure to use the trick that ensures you only get high-end cars (permanently fill the warehouse with every worthless sourced car in the game, then you will only get high-end cars after that).
• Acid Lab: The best passive income business in the game. Spend some time doing Dax's contact missions to fully upgrade your lab's efficiency and it will become very profitable. Then mix up your gameplay between both sourcing Acid supplies or buying them. And do the sales missions.
• Franklin's Agency: Do the Dr. Dre story missions, then do 201x Security Contract missions until you've unlocked the highest amount of passive daily income (it goes up by $100 every time you do a mission, capped at $20,000 after having done 201 contracts).
• Payphone Hits: They're unlocked after doing at least 3 Security Contract missions. Then you can pick up assassination contracts from ringing payphones. They're very profitable.
• Weekly Time Trials: Do the camotorcycle time trial and the RC car time trial every week, they're a good way to learn how to drive and they give a nice bit of money! Remember that you can hold a key to respawn at the start of the race before the time has ended, if you're sure that you won't make it in time.
• Daily Objectives: In your interaction menu, look at the Objectives and complete them. They're a good way to be inspired to do things you might not do otherwise.
• Daily Collectible Hunts: G's Cache (hunt for the hidden street cache), Kosatka submarine treasure hunt, Street dealer (find it and sell to it every day), etc.
• Get a Fresh Look: Create a new character outfit (clothes, hairstyle, tattoos, mask).
• Use Different Weapons: Challenge yourself to use different weapons than the same old, boring weapon you always use. For example, how about only using the Heavy Revolver? Make those shots count!
• Modify Your Weapons: Change their styles and attachments.
• Tune Your Precious Car: You might have a "perfectly tuned" car that you've been driving for years and that you're always using. Why not modify it a bit? Put a different livery on it, and some different colors at least? What felt "fresh" two years ago would just be contributing to a feeling of "staleness" today. Freshen things up!
• Ride of the Day: Most long-time players have around a hundred vehicles, but most of them collect dust. Why not set fun "challenge" rules for yourself, such as randomly selecting a vehicle and using only that vehicle on that real-life day?
• Outfit of the Day: Why not make it your goal to create a new character "outfit of the day" (or week) whenever you log in? It's a great way to get a fresh feeling every time you play!
• Minigames: How about some Golf, Tennis, Darts or Arm Wrestling?
• Gang Attacks: Find a gang and eliminate them!
• Stash Houses: Find the stash houses and raid them for resources for your businesses.
• Parachute: Go somewhere high up and do a parachute dive! Better yet, look for the Junk Energy Skydives challenges on the map, or do Dom's parachute challenge (which is a special skydive at a random location).
• San Andreas Flight School: Do the flight school challenges! They're at the Los Santos Airport, at the airplane icon!
• Gun Range Challenges: Complete the Bunker's and Ammo-Nation Gun Range shooting challenges!
• Gun Range with Friends: Challenge a friend to the gun range mini-games, where you compete to see who is the most accurate!
• MC Club Missions: Form a MC club with at least one friend, then ride in formation and start MC missions via the interaction menu.
• MC Businesses: Yes, they're the most hated businesses in the game, but why not do them a little bit? You could do a little bit of supplying and a few small sales missions, to ensure that you have small sales. Or, team up with friends and take turns helping each other do larger sales.
• Racing: Do Open Wheel, Stunt Races, Transform Races, and Regular Races. There are so many different kinds of races in the game! The transform races are the newest feature, and are very cool, since you might drive a supercar down the street to the airport, then transform into a plane and fly through the sky, and other epic things, all in the same race map!
• LS Car Meet: Do the challenges, races and rank up your LS Car Meet rank. Try to win the Prize Ride!
• Lobby Car Meets: You can try arranging car meets with other people in the lobby, to check out each other's cars! Just beware of griefers. You may want to do it in the LS Car Meet building to avoid the griefer explosions, or just switch to a lobby with cooler people.
• Arcade: Play the arcade games and try to beat them! Some of them have hidden rewards for completing the game or completing certain challenges.
• Achievements: Look at the pause menu's Stats - Awards section, and pick some award that you'll try to complete! There are so many fun challenges in there, such as attempting to parachute for more than 3 minutes, or robbing every store on the map (you can see the checkmarks on the map to know if you've robbed those stores).
• Stunt Jumps: There are 50 stunt jump locations on the map, which unlock a few rewards and are also really fun to complete!
• Unlock Vehicle Colors: You may have noticed that certain colors are locked behind challenges, such as winning a certain amount of races. Why not finally unlock those colors you've always wanted but were always "too lazy" to unlock? You'll get to enjoy some flashy, new vehicle colors!
• Arena War: Very fun, but unfortunately hard to get a group going for it. But if you can get a group, Arena War is super fun.
• Freemode Battles: Join a large lobby and just do whatever you want while you're waiting for freemode battles, which start every 20 minutes and will alternate between Business Battles and Freemode Challenges. Then attempt to win those battles! Events will only trigger when there are at least 4 players outdoors, and they cannot be in the same CEO/MC.
• Ride with Strangers: Pick your nicest car and then drive around and invite strangers to either ride with you or do impromptu street race 1v1 challenges.
• Freemode Map Markers: Look at the map. There are icons and glowing markers everywhere on the map/streets. Visit whichever icon is nearest your current location and see what's there! Remember that you can go "On Call" (queue) for public races/missions while you're waiting for them to fill up, which lets you stay in Freemode while you're waiting.
• Weekly Bonuses: Look at the Rockstar Newswire to see what the weekly bonus money is, and focus on doing that business/event for a while, to earn some money!
• Max Your Stats: Get all your stats to maximum! Most people haven't finished Strength, which can be gradually maxed for fun by simply punching every civilian you see.
• Invade the Military: Invade the military base at Fort Zancudo with some friends, and make it your mission to steal a Lazer jet plane.
• Heists: Do some heist preps or full heists for fun! Many of them can be casually setup while solo, which is very relaxing! Most of the newer heists can even be completed while solo!
• Change Your Heist Routes: You don't have to always do the same approach over and over again. Most heists have a lot of different approaches. For example, have you ever successfully completed the "Silent and Sneaky" approach at the Casino? Start exploring the different possibilities out there!
• Yellow Mission Markers: The yellow letters/markers on the map show the location of significant storyline missions (such as ULP, Agency, Acid Lab, etc). Visit those locations and start completing the stories that GTA Online has to offer!
• Do the Jobs: Go to "Online - Jobs" in the pause menu, and explore the available options!
• Answer the Calls: There are so many fun missions for English Dave, the various DJs at the Music Locker, the Casino staff, etc. In most cases, you'll also get some kind of reward if you finish them all! You might even get them to stop calling you when you've finished everything, which is a nice reward in itself!
• Check Your Texts/Emails: There's a lot of "mini missions" that arrive via emails/text messages. For example, Simeon asks you to steal certain cars every day. There's also an early game treasure hunt which starts through an email.
• Use Quick Join: There's an app on your phone named "Quick Join". It queues you for a rapid, random job. It's a great way to explore new content, meet new people and to help them with the queues for their own missions.
• Browse the Internet: There are a ton of funny parody websites in GTA Online's internet browser. Explore what's out there!
• Watch TV/Movies: Have you seen all the TV shows and cinema movies yet? If not, relax and have some fun! :)
• Customize Your Phone: You can change the theme, background, ringtone and other settings for your in-game phone. Why not change things a bit?
• Don't Be Annoyed: The phone calls and missions may seem annoying, but try actually relaxing and doing them. Listen to the phone calls. Call the NPCs. Do their missions! They are pretty nice and chill activities which gives you something to do in the game and some challenges.
• Use a Gamepad: If you're a PC player, you'll know that most of the game is too easy, since the aiming and enemy difficulty was balanced for console (gamepad) players. Try using a gamepad on PC! Not only will your driving and flying be massively improved, you'll also have a much more fun fun time when fighting enemies, since you can't just "360 No Scope" everything with your superior pointing device anymore. You'll even get immersive rumble that lets you feel the engine of your cars! How cool is that?! The game's options lets you finetune the sensitivity and aiming mode, and true professionals will use "Free Aim" which completely disables the auto-aiming.
• Meet Different People: If you're mostly a heist person, look for someone who loves cars and start hanging out with them to absorb some of their passion for another aspect of the game. You might learn to love car tuning too!
• Trade Prices: Many vehicles in the game have trade prices which give you a massive discount on the vehicle if you complete the challenge first. So set your eyes on a nice vehicle and do its challenges for fun! The discount you're earning will be like earning a huge sum of money that you put towards that specific vehicle. For example, a 2 million dollar discount on a vehicle you wanted is the same as if you had just earned 2 million dollars that you decided to spend on that vehicle! So don't sleep on the trade price discounts! They're a fun challenge with a very high monetary value!
• Bunker Research: If you have a bunker, try doing the research! You can unlock a ton of cool and super useful vehicle and weapon modifications! The explosive and incendiary ammo are must-haves.
• Mobile Operations Missions: The Mobile Operations Center is a forgotten business. It exists in your bunker, but you can request it via your Interaction Menu. Enter the truck's trailer, and then start missions from the computer in the command room!
• Avenger: Take your Avenger out for a drive! It's an extremely powerful, heavily armored aircraft and can be customized with various fun additions.
• Relaxing Yacht: Why not purchase or upgrade your yacht, and chill on it for a while with some friends? It even has lots of fun water vehicles parked in the water at the yacht, and helicopter pads for easy travel.
• Yacht Missions: You can start the fun "A Superyacht Life" mission series from the captain on your yacht. You'll even get a fun Yacht Captain outfit if you complete them all as host.
• Special Vehicle Work: The Vehicle Warehouse provides various epic missions whose "main" purpose is to unlock trade prices on various weaponized vehicles, but the missions themselves are fun too. Most players only do the specific missions for the vehicles they wanted to buy. Why not complete them all at least once, or play them again for fun?
• Collectibles: The map is full of collectible items, such as USB music sticks, playing cards, action figures, signal jammers (to unlock the best hacker for the Casino heist), etc. Why not relax and do them all for fun? They all unlock something fun or useful!
• Dream Vehicle: Relax, do some research about vehicles are available in the game, and set your eyes on a new "dream vehicle". Then work towards earning it and pimping it just the way you want it! Having a goal is fun!
• Test Drives: Check out the weekly test drives at the "Luxury Autos" shop, at Simeon's "Premium Deluxe Motorsport", and at the "LS Car Meet". You might find your new dream vehicle!
• Collect Vehicle Sets: You might have fun building specific collections, such as all Benny's vehicles in the game, etc. Setting goals for yourself about specific vehicle collections gives you something to strive for, and means that there's a lot of new things you'll need to buy and tune, which will keep you busy for a while!
• Sell Vehicles: Let's be honest, there are a lot of stinkers in your collection. Why not sell them? Just beware of the game's daily sell limit. The limit will be hit somewhere around 30-40 cars sold in 24 real-life hours. I'd suggest only selling 1-5 cars per real life day, which ensures that you'll never face the anger of Rockstar, and you'll have more time to make deliberate choices about which vehicles to get rid of. You'll also be getting roughly 50% of your previously spent money back for each sold vehicle! I'd recommend forcing yourself to drive a vehicle for a while before selling it, and looking at its customizations to see if you'd like it if you changed its style a bit, so that you're absolutely sure that you don't want it.
• Organize Your Vehicles: A lot of people have a complete mess in their garages. Why not begin sorting your cars, such as placing all your best cars at the premium display spots in your office garage? Perhaps organizing the floors by vehicle type? You can have lots of fun and you'll get a much better overview of your available vehicles.
• Relocate Yourself: If you've been staring at the same, old, boring spot for years, it could be fun to move! Most players choose the ugly, industrial, "optimal" locations. Why not relax and move to the beautiful beach instead? The Lombank office, the Insert Coin arcade, the Vespucci Beach MC clubhouse, the Del Perro Nightclub, the Strawberry auto shop, and the Vespucci Canals agency are all very beautiful locations with amazing interior and exterior design and great views! They're also very well placed for all of their business purposes!
• Browse in Person: When you're looking at real estate on the internet, things look very boring and impersonal. Why not take a drive around the city and look at the "real estate for sale" map markers in person? Perhaps you'll find a great new location for your home! However, if it's a multi-apartment house, I recommend checking YouTube for the various room views, to find the room with the best view before you buy it.
• Upgrade Your Properties/Businesses: If you haven't yet upgraded all of the equipment for a business, it's a great idea to upgrade it to improve its efficiency and safety. Or how about changing the interior design for fun, to replace the "same old daily view" with a fresh new look?
• Buy Every Arcade Machine: There are so many fun minigame machines for your arcade. Why not buy them all and pimp that place out? It's a nice place to relax, and even get some rewards for completing the games.
• Get All Passive Businesses: Why not work towards getting and fully upgrading all of the passive incomes in the game? Such as the Nightclub (which automatically generates money in the safe based on popularity, and generates MC business products to sell from its basement), the Acid Lab (which can be restocked with a simple phone call to Mutt, and has easy sales missions), the Arcade (which generates $5000 per in-game day when you've filled all of its interior slots with arcade machines, which can all be the same machine if you want), the Agency (which generates up to $20000 per in-game day based on how many Security Contracts you've completed), Street Dealers (finding the daily street dealer is much faster than regular sales missions, and they pay more than regular missions), Bunker (you can resupply it via one click with the Master Control Terminal in your Arcade, and then simply sell the product when it's still less than 25% full, thus guaranteeing a single sales vehicle every time). An added bonus of having passive businesses is the fact that they let you do other things in the game, such as doing racing and other fun challenges, while your businesses passively produce for you!
• Start Fresh: Did you know that your online account has two character slots? You can actually start fresh by simply withdrawing all of you banked money to your primary character, so that there's $0 in the bank. Then create a new character, which will begin at $0. Then relax and enjoy the ride of building a new empire. I suggest doing things differently this time. For example, if your primary character owns every business, why not just focus on a specific business this time, such as the CEO businesses (cargo crates), or just the vehicle warehouse, etc? Take this opportunity to simplify and avoid grinding, while still building a new playstyle to keep things fresh! Why not skip the Kosatka, so that you don't have the "easy Cayo Perico money" either? This slower, more deliberate, old-school way of making money will ensure that you have lots of fun, and you can set your own goals for what vehicles you want to save up money for on your new character! If you get tired of the grind, just switch back to your primary character again and enjoy the wealth. You can even delete your secondary character again to start fresh as many times as you want to.
• Spend Your Money: Having $100 million unused in the bank is just a completely pointless number, and is basically worth the same as having $0 in the bank if you aren't even using it. Unless your goal is to collect a specific amount of money for fun, I'd instead suggest that you actually start spending absolutely all of your money! Because if you can succeed in being perpetually slightly low on cash, you'll have much more reason to care about doing your businesses when you do want to buy something, which in turn drives your motivation to play again! Having a huge stash of money is bad for your motivation to play! Having a huge sash of money is like having an endless "Rich Daddy's Credit Card" in your wallet. Get rid of that credit card, buy a bunch of fun stuff, and enjoy the game more as a result!
• Play the Story: The vast majority of GTA Online players have barely touched the offline story. Why not relax with the story from time to time, gradually making your way through the epic offline story that started it all?
• Take a Break: If you're truly not finding any fun anymore, then take a break, perhaps a few weeks or a month is all you need to enjoy the game again! They also release content updates roughly twice per year, so you'll always have something new to return to in the future! :)

(32F) In 2021, I hurt my family by posting things and acting crazy on social media. Things have been kind of rocky with my family since, but my brother hasn’t spoken to me since 2021. The last thing he said to me was “I’m embarrassed of you, don’t ever talk to me again. You’re a clown.” I’m blocked on everything by him —- phone number and all socials.
All my life I’ve tried to be close with him, but he’s never really let me in. He’s two years younger than I am and we even went to the same college. I’ve always been a little more eccentric, and he’s always worried about his image & what people think. Because of that, he’s always kept me away. We moved to the same city and I only hung out with him a handful of times, for the rest he was “too busy.”
He recently proposed to his girlfriend, who he never really allowed me to get close to either. Today I found out that my little brother and her little brother are both in the wedding. I am not.
I congratulated his fiancé when it happened since she didn’t block me, but I was never able to talk to my brother, and still haven’t since 2021. I asked her to tell him I was sorry and that I loved him, and that if he ever wanted to talk about things I was here. I don’t know if she ever told him those things or not.
The thought of not playing a part in his wedding, or not being in family photos etc is absolutely gut wrenching. I want to help plan the bridal shower, the bachelorette, all of the things. She’ll be my sister and we will have the same relationship — I’ll be kept at a distance.
I’m really hurt. I know I embarrassed him and was nuts on social media, but even before any of that he always kept me away. I’ve heard from my mom in the past year that he “feels bad for me.” Mental illness to him is shameful. I’m 32 and recently had to move back in with my parents. I’m also on disability now. I know in my heart that he thinks of me as a loser.
I don’t know what to do or why I’m writing this. It just helps to vent.

Whew! I did not expect such a positive response to the first chapter. A huge thank you to everyone who read my post and upvoted it.
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Previous
Acrid smoke hung in the air of Hreln’s office. It was an indulgence she didn’t often allow herself since most other races found it unpleasant, but there were still times. More so since what the press agencies had dubbed the ‘Human Incident.’
Now she caught herself rubbing her mandibles against each other. Given the complicated and sensitive nature of the overall problem, Hreln had decided it was best to place as much as possible under her official seal. Reporters being reporters, none of them were satisfied with the limited statements she’d made. Yes, she’d met with the terrorists as they’d demanded. No, she would not discuss that meeting. Yes, a Tochvorda representative had barged into the meeting and been assaulted by one of the humans. No, she didn’t have further comment about that either. Yes, the humans had been detained. No, they were not available for interviews. One news agency had even gone so far as to try getting another sector magistrate to order her to unseal the case. The result had been a heavily encrypted and diplomatically worded “What the hells, Hreln?” to which she had replied with an equally heavily encrypted and diplomatically worded “You’re not going to believe this but-.”
The other magistrate’s response to that could be summed up as “Holy crap, you need some help?”
Finally, Senator Tanaka stepped into her office, Colonel Hargreaves following behind. Hreln had wondered if the two of them were mated but no, they were both mated to different people. Tanaka was simply the senior civilian representative while Hargreaves was in command of the military contingent. Apparently, humans normally kept the two separate, with senior civilian leaders having ultimate control over the military. No matter. The Imperium was flexible about how member worlds handled their local government, as long as the rights of all citizens were observed and the Imperium’s laws were followed. Flexible to a point, anyway.
Tanaka bowed. “My apologies for the delay in our arrival. A… disciplinary matter among the troops required Colonel Hargreaves’ attention.”
“Hopefully nothing too serious.” Probably not, or Gerima should have already heard about it.
“No, simply soldiers with nothing to do finding inappropriate ways to occupy themselves. Only the rank of those involved required my attention.” And that was all Hargreaves was going to say about it.
Presented with over a thousand not-quite prisoners that needed to be kept as far out of the public eye as possible, Magistrate Hreln had come up with a rather… unique solution. She had packed the whole lot of them off to an unfinished island resort that had gone into bankruptcy partway through construction. Some grunt work provided by literal grunts and their confinement was downright sybaritic. The clothing replicators even produced beachwear.
Unfortunately, the old saying about idle hands being the Devil’s playthings still held true. Faced with nothing to do and vague orders to standby to standby, some of the troops had decided to start building boats for a breakout. Their ‘plan’ (to insult a perfectly good noun) had been to sail somewhere else and start wreaking havoc, in the hope of encouraging the Imperium to find in humanity’s favor a little quicker.
The colonel had come down on the boat builders as hard as he thought he could without attracting undue attention. Reduction in rank and confinement were a slap on the wrist in the current circumstances but hopefully, it would discourage any more escape attempts. He’d also told his officers to start working on more things to keep everyone busy. A soccer league had been his personal suggestion. Let them run themselves out.
Now Tanaka turned and bowed towards what looked like a large jellyfish floating in a tank. “Honored ser, I don’t believe I’ve met you before.”
The jellyfish twirled and turned a deep purple color, a cheerful voice coming from the base of the tank. “No, we haven’t. Most people who aren’t familiar with my species tend to assume I’m just decoration. What gave it away? You can call me Ahapsu, by the way. And to put things in terms you’re familiar with, I’m your lawyer unless you have an objection.”
“Lawyer?” Hargreaves frowned. “Yeah, I guess we need one of those. And I don’t know what the senator saw, but your tank is on counter-grav. Seemed a bit much for a fish tank.”
“Fish tank? Ah, a holding tank for aquatic lifeforms. That wouldn’t work with me.” Ahapsu rose from the water in their tank and did a pirouette around the humans before plopping back into the water. “My race is one of the few graced with psionic capabilities; levitation and limited telepathy. I ‘speak’ using a voder built into my tank.”
<> Ahapsu sent to both of them. <>
<> Tanaka sent back, biting her lip to keep from speaking aloud. <>
<>
<> Hargreaves tossed in. <>
<> Tanaka shot back. <>
<> Ahapsu twirled in their tank for a moment, turning a dizzying array of colors before settling on yellow. “Sorry for the silence, everyone. I needed to clarify something with my clients before we began. I’ll file something official shortly, Your Eminence. Still, the short version is that since the leadership of the Terran resistance was and is made up of officials from pre-annexation governments, instead of being a ‘terrorist organization,’ they should be viewed as a coalition of local Dirt governments. Or possibly as the government of Dirt, my firm will have to research that.”
“Earth,” Hargreaves put in.
“Excuse me?” Ahapsu must have paid well for their tank’s voder; it managed to sound perplexed.
“The official name of our planet is ‘Earth.’ Or ‘Terra’ but they were still arguing about that when the Tochvorda started leveling cities. And ‘Earth’ and ‘Dirt’ have similar meanings in most of our languages, but it’s a bit of nuance so let’s just stick with Earth.”
“We stand corrected.” Hreln shifted uncomfortably on her stool, turning the matter over in her mind. “Before I rule on this, I’ll want some serious research from my own staff. Plus whatever arguments you put before me, of course.”
“So, are they still under arrest?” Gerima rumbled. Are they still my problem or what?
“Let’s leave their status as ‘detained for their own security’ until I make a ruling” Hreln chittered. “If they are a legitimate government or governments, then what happened on Highport Numena may constitute a legitimate act of war.”
“Act of war?!?” Gerima leaped to his feet, fangs bared. “They threatened to murder civilians!”
“Yes, and how many of their people have died, hmm? Given the circumstances, it could be argued that they had no choice but to consider themselves at war with the Imperium as a whole and the Tochvorda in specific.” Ahapsu was pink at the moment, Tanaka noted. “Especially given how often their attempts at protest or simple dialog ended in repression.”
“The hospital riots,” Hargreaves noted.
“Enlighten us, please.” Hreln leaned forward intent on what Hargreaves had to say.
“Not a complicated story. A Roach-pardon, a derogatory term for Tochvorda due to their resemblance to a type of Earth vermin-official decided whatever he was in charge of needed a shiny new headquarters. Except he wanted to put it right smack dab on top of Chicago’s most-functional hospital, with no plans for a replacement. People protested, security troops slaughtered the protesters, and it turned into riots. Even the security troops gave up trying to suppress it and settled on containment, waiting for the violence to burn itself out. Took over a week.” Hargreaves shook his head. “Somebody got the r-Tochvorda official, though. He got called to the governor’s palace to answer for his part in everything and his aircar got taken out by a SAM. Uh, that’s short for surface-to-air-missile, a weapon used to destroy aircraft.”
‘I’d like to address something you just said, Colonel. You said the site was Chicago’s most-functional hospital. Were other hospitals not in operation?” Ahapsu floated out of their tank again, drifting back and forth.
“Not really. Between the first barrage and the Tochvorda’s habit of smashing anything that annoyed them, the global supply chain was in crappy shape. Still is. There are shortages in food, medicine, just about anything you could name. Hell, the Resistance is doing more to keep things running than the Tochvorda are, in a lot of places.”
“Ah.” Ahapsu stopped in front of Hargreaves. “It seems we have our first volley against the Tochvorda, sers. I shall prepare a lawsuit against their government in general and specifically the governor.”
“On what grounds?” Hreln’s tone was decidedly unamused.
---
The thing about dealing with corrupt officials is that like most people, they see what they expect to see. Pay the inspectors at a spaceport to ignore the comings and goings from a specific warehouse, and they’ll assume you’re smuggling. They don’t ask what you’re smuggling, because then they’d know what you’re doing instead of merely suspecting. This time, though, instead of asking for more money they would have made a discrete call to planetary security.
In defiance of all dramatic tradition, it was a hot, still, dry, moonlit night as the trucks pulled up to the warehouse. The driver of the first truck walked up to the security panel and punched in a code, which failed to get a response. Satisfied, he punched in a second code which opened the door. Whistling a cheerful tune, he wandered over to the nearest cargo container. Checking the serial number, he started disarming its security measures.
“Do you have to fucking whistle?” hissed the woman following him.
“Relax, nobody’s been in here, or the place would be a crater and you know it. And knock off the swearing, you know the Colonel hates it.”
“Well, he’s not here-”
With a clunk, the last of the container’s security disarmed itself and the door swung open, showing two rows of stasis pods and some very annoyed soldiers. “What took so long?” Colonel Hargreaves snapped. Behind him, soldiers started fanning out around the containers.
“Sorry, sir, we didn’t get notified you’d arrived until the containers were in the warehouse. And, ah, when we set up this smuggling route, nobody figured on this much coming back so soon, so we didn’t have transport handy.”
“Right.” Hargreaves looked at the row of containers, trying not to move his head too much. Coming out of stasis was not kind to his sense of balance. It would pass. “Everything going according to plan here?”
“Yep, everybody’s keeping their heads down, more or less. Given, ah, how much stuff you brought back, I take it nuclear diplomacy worked? You get some guns out of the Imperium?” the woman asked, a feral grin spreading across her face as she contemplated the potential for mayhem.
“Better.” Hargreaves walked over to one stasis pod and triggered the shutdown sequence. When the grey haze of the zero-tau field cleared, a being that looked like a man-sized chinchilla was blinking back at them.
“We’ve got weapons-grade lawyers.”
---
“So let me summarize where we stand.” Moritz Vogel was not only the senior German representative on the Resistance’s command council,he was also one of the oldest members of the council, period. And he looked every inch the elder statesman as he leaned back in his chair, steepling his fingers. “Reaching out to the sector magistrate has succeeded in drawing her attention, regardless of… the delivery of our message. An investigation has been opened but that will take some time. Some things are truly universal, I suppose. As a short-term measure, our best move is to assert a claim that we represent a coalition of regional Terran governments and sue both the governor and the Tochvorda government for all the benefits we should have been getting as part of the invasion, apologies, ‘annexation.’ Plus damages for everything that’s been destroyed and staggering loss of human life, directly and indirectly. Do I have that correct?”
“Accurate enough for the purposes of this discussion, if lacking in detail,” Rokketch answered, yawning. His body clock was way off; it felt like the middle of the night to him. “Ahapsu asked me to see what else we could add before formally filing the lawsuit. As one of your legal representatives, I’ve already noticed two things that it would probably be in your best interest to maintain some secrecy about.”
“What do you mean? Areas where we are vulnerable?” Arina Guseva was the sole Russian member of the council, something she resented.
“No, just… I’m sure there are Imperium officials that will say admitting this isn’t in the Imperium’s best interests, but you seem to have developed two technologies that the Imperium hasn’t. As such, they constitute significant bargaining leverage.” Rokketch couldn’t help but twitch at the admission.
“The first is your zero-tau stasis technology. Its ability to drastically slow time within a small volume will be very valuable for the transport of perishable goods and livestock, plus I imagine it could be used to stabilize critical patients until needed care is available. It might even see use in passenger transport, though the effects of coming out of stasis may limit that.”
Muttering broke out among the council. Guseva just shook her head. “It was a laboratory curiosity until we figured out how to make it practical on a larger scale. Then we used it for the crew of our first interstellar mission. I wonder what became of them?”
“Hopefully still on their way to Proxima Centauri,” Chiron said brightly. “They shouldn’t reach their destination for approximately another five years. But ser Rokketch, you said there were two technologies. What is the other one?”
“Well, you, ser. Or rather your kind.”
“Oh.” Chiron was the sole artificial intelligence on the command council, and their inclusion hadn’t sat well with most of its members. “I’m rather more surprised about that, to be honest. Has the Imperium never tried to develop cybernetic consciousness?”
“Tried, yes. Succeeded no. Or at least not to a degree where the result would be accepted as a fellow sapient as you seem to be.” Rokketch looked at the human members of the council. “I am correct in that, he is regarded as a fully sapient entity?”
“I am recognized as a legal person and have full citizenship,” Chiron said. “Though ‘he’ is inaccurate, since I have no gender. There are few of us left; most were in cities that were Tochvorda first strike targets.”
Seeing Rokketch’s reaction to that, Vogel raised a placating hand. “That isn’t to say the technology is lost, merely that… Given the situation since the annexation, we haven’t been able to expend the resources to create more.”
“Plus, once we have access to the Imperium’s computer technology, I’m sure we’ll be able to create more advanced cybernetic intelligence than myself. And I can go back to astronomy, thank you very much,” Chiron added. That drew a chuckle from the rest of the council. Chiron had survived the initial bombardment because they had been helping run a radio telescope in Chile.
“Yes, well,” Vogel cleared his throat. “At this point, there’s a matter I’d like to bring before the council. Given everything we’ve heard today, it seems that continuing to refer to ourselves as simply ‘the Reistance’ might not help our legal cause. I would like to put a motion before this council that we adopt an official name. Is there any comment, or shall we move to a vote?”
---
“Governor Vonnuk? There’s, there’s someone here to see you.”
Vonnuk looked up from his security chief’s report in annoyance. The upstart human terrorists had been too quiet for his liking since well before the incident on Highport Numena. And that bothered him far more than their usual violence did.
He’d caught all sorts of hell from his superiors about it, of course. Exactly how had the terrorists managed to get to Highport Numena, much less get their hands on nuclear demolition charges, hmm? Vonnuk had managed to placate them by launching a thorough investigation, which so far had yielded very little. The humans were aggravatingly skilled at being sneaky.
Magistrate Hreln’s non-statements about the incident bothered him most all.
Still… “I gave strict orders that I was not to be disturbed.”
“Yes, sir, but… it’s a courier from the magistrate’s office, sir.”
“A courier?” That was unusual. Couriers were only used for physical documents, and he couldn’t think of any request from the magistrate’s office that would need to be sent physically. “Give me a few moments to finish what I’m doing and then I’ll see them.”
Vonnuk closed the report, checked his grooming, and then signaled his assistant to send the courier in. The courier was another spider-like shoan, the same species as Hreln. Probably not a relative; shoan were fairly common in this part of the Imperium.
What startled him was the human following the courier in. “What is that doing here?” Vonnuk yelled. Now he knew what had bothered his aide so much.
“He’s with me,” the shoan said irritatedly. “My name is Mollot, and I’m a courier attached to Magistrate Hreln’s office. I have two things to deliver to you.”
A datadisc dropped down on Vonnuk’s desk. “Magistrate Hreln has ordered a full Imperial audit of the Tochvorda’s annexation of Earth, and their administration of it since. Here is your notification of the audit, plus your orders to comply with the audit. The auditor’s staff will be contacting you shortly. A copy of this is also being sent to your superiors in the state ministry on Chechiak.”
Another datadisc. “You are also being sued, both personally and in your office as Governor of Earth as well as your government, by the Terran Confederacy. The preliminary claims are that you have illegally and inappropriately denied humans of their lives and property, denied them benefits that they should have received as part of the annexation, including but not limited to health care improvements, energy and industrial infrastructure improvements, it’s quite the list. You have also fraudulently denied them local autonomy as is their right as part of the Imperium. Copies of this are also being sent to your superiors.”
“I-I won’t accept this!” Vonnuk screamed.
“Refusal to accept this does not nullify their legal authority.”
“Or as we put it around here,” the human leaned forward, grinning, “Boom, motherfucker.”

Banks and estate/court back in USA will need to be informed.
I'm sure the process starts with a foreign-country death cert being issued. But then what ?
Go to US embassy/consulate and get a "Consular Report of the Death of an American Abroad" ? Or is that not needed ?
Apostille and translate the foreign-country death cert, and send that package to the US banks and court ? What do banks want to get ?
Who informs US Social Security Administration ?
Thanks for any info.

2022 1040NR / W-7 ITIN Application Guide - Gambling Income Method

The purpose of this post is to provide a simple step-by-step guide for Canadians to apply for and obtain an ITIN so that they can apply for US credit cards and take advantage of US credit card signup bonuses. This guide involves submitting a Form W-7 Application for ITIN and a 1040NR non-resident tax return to the Internal Revenue Service (IRS).
This is a method that should apply to most Canadians. Please leave all questions as comments, as I often browse through this thread without logging in and generally do not respond to DMs.

Disclaimer

I am not a qualified tax professional, so please use this guide at your own risk. The information provided here is for educational purposes only and should not be used as official tax advice.

Notice about Paid Services

Paid services are available, but they are not necessary as the forms are simple to complete. I do not endorse any specific service. If you choose to use a paid service, ensure that their PTIN and full name are disclosed on any 1040NR form you file.
The preparation of a tax return for compensation, including the 1040NR non-resident tax return discussed below, requires that the preparer be registered with the IRS, and the preparer must include the PTIN and their personal information (including their name) on the second page of the 1040NR under "Paid Preparer Use Only", irrespective of the method of submission. If you pay for a service that prepares for you an 1040NR (including a "draft" of such a return), and fails to disclose their PTIN on the documents you file, that preparer may be subject to IRC 6695 penalties, injunction and/or disciplinary action.
If you are using a paid service always ensure that their PTIN and full name are disclosed on any 1040NR you file. It protects you too, as they can be penalized by the IRS for unauthorized disclosure or use of your personal information.

Big Picture: How it Works

There are very specific reason where the IRS will issue an ITIN. These include to obtain tax treaty benefits, to file a tax return, and more. Throughout the years, administrative efficiency has taken away the need to issue an ITIN for the purposes of obtaining a tax treaty benefit. So if you have been reading about obtaining an ITIN by saying "I need an ITIN to reduce my withholding tax with Amazon/Smashwords", this no longer works, it is not worth your time to try.
Instead, the ITIN can be obtained by filing a tax return declaring some amount of U.S. income, which I will share with you upfront, although paid ITIN services will skirt around informing you of this directly. The fact that you haven't actually earned anything is irrelevant here (unless you don't want an ITIN lol). The self-declared income can be sourced from US-based online casinos, so you don't even need to set foot in the USA to claim US-source gambling income (as noted by Prince of Travel).
Think of it as "I have $85 USD of gambling/interest income sourced from the USA (e.g. gambling: specifically from blackjack, baccarat, craps, roulette, or big-6 wheel; interest: interest from a US source), and I'm an upstanding person so I need to report it to the IRS".
This guide will use gambling income, but it only takes minor changes if you want to report interest income instead on your 1040NR instead.

Timeline

The time it takes for you to receive your ITIN letter varies greatly but appears to have settled around 1.5 months in 2023 at the time I updated this post. You may want to read through comments in this thread or the 2022 thread (for 2021 tax forms), to see other people's timelines. Please share your own! I sort the threads by New in order for newer data points to be more visible.

Who it won't work for:

• People eligible for a SSN (are eligible to work in the USA and don't need an ITIN)
• People who already have an ITIN (it will require minor modifications to submit for renewal)
• People who have other sources of US-source income (please get professional tax help)

What you'll need to prepare the forms:

• Download the following forms
• W-7 Form (and the W-7 instructions for reference)
• 1040NR Form
• Supplementary forms and schedules to the 1040NR: !!!!* Schedule 1 !!!!* Schedule OI
• Proof of identity, Canadian passport preferred, see below
• A listing of dates you were physically present in the USA for, for the year you are filing for (currently 2022 tax year) - it's ok if this is zero.
• Number of days in USA for each of the three previous years (2020, 2021, 2022)
• Your Social Insurance Number (Canada)

What you don't need:

• Proof of gambling income - you are self-declaring gambling income, and in practice the amount of income you declare is less than the amount required for a casino to issue you a W-2G (a form that declares your gambling winnings)
• To step foot in the USA during the year you are filing - you are self-declaring gambling income from an online US-based casino

Completing the W-7 (Rev Aug. 2019)

• Screenshots of completed forms (square is optional)
• At the top right of the form, select Apply for a New ITIN
• Under Reason you’re submitting Form W-7., check b
• Complete the Name section, must match your passport
• Complete Mailing Address: Foreign is okay - IRS will return your documents here
• Complete Foreign (non-U.S.) Address: Yes, you need to write it out again even if it's the same as Mailing Address
• Birth Information: Complete. If your birth country is not recognized as one by the USA, you will need to fill in a country recognized by the USA.
• Countries of Citizenship: You need to enter all the countries you have citizenship in 6a
• Foreign Tax I.D. Number: You MUST enter your Canadian Social Insurance Number in 6b
• Type of U.S. Visa: Leave blank. If you have a US Visa (e.g. F-1, TN or H1-B) and are physically working or studying in the USA, do not use this guide. If you have a temporary visa, you can choose to enter it here (see my comments)
• Identification Document Submitted: Check Passport, enter Canada, your Passport Number and the expiry date, leave blank date of entry
• 6e: No
• 6f: leave blank
• 6g: leave blank
• Sign Here: Sign in ink and enter the date and your phone number (Canadian phone number okay)
• Acceptance Agent's Use ONLY: Do not complete

2022 Form 1040NR:

• Screenshot of completed form (square is optional)
• Filing status: Single, Married filing separately or Qualifying Widower (widowed within last two calendar years, and have a dependant)
• Name: Must match W-7
• Identifying number - leave blank
• Complete preferred foreign mailing address
• Virtual currency: This is about cryptocurrency, NFTs and other digital assets and is explained on Pg 15 of the 2022 1040 Instructions, tl;dr just need to put yes/no, don't need to actually report income on return.
• Dependents: You don't have to claim dependents, just leave it blank
• Line 8: Enter that magical number greater than $75 and less than $100 that you're claiming as your gambling income
• Line 9: Same as Line 8
• Line 11: Same as Line 8
• Line 15: Same as Line 8
• Line 16: If your number that you picked above was >=75 and <100, then enter 9 (for 2022), otherwise consult Page 3 of the Tax Table
• Line 18: Enter the same amount as Line 16
• Line 22: Enter the same amount as Line 16
• Line 24: Enter the same amount as Line 16
• Line 26: 0 (Zero)
• Line 32: 0 (Zero)
• Line 33: 0 (Zero)
• Line 37: Same as Line 16
• Line 38: Leave blank - your income is less than $1,000, therefore you should not owe a penalty according to Form 2210.
• Third Party Designee check no, unless you are doing this for P2 and want to
• Sign Here: Sign in ink, date and enter your occupation. Phone and email are optional. Leave PIN blank.
• Paid Preparer Use Only: Leave blank

Schedule 1:

• Screenshot of completed form
• Name at the very top of page
• Part I, Line 8b: Enter the amount from Line 8 of your 1040NR
• Line 9: Same number
• Line 10: Same number
• There is a Page 2, you can include it blank in your application or omit it entirely

Schedule OI:

• Screenshot of completed form
• Name at the very top of page
• A: What country you were a citizen or national during the tax year (legal immigration status)
• B: What country were you a tax resident of during the year: if you live and work in Canada, it is probably Canada only
• C, D, expected to be no
• E: Write "N/A - Not present in U.S. — No U.S. immigration status" into the line, unless you were physically present in the USA on Dec 31
• F: No
• G: List all dates you entered and left the USA in 2022 (this includes layovers), only applicable if you were physically present in the USA, Possible_Quantity_57 suggested checking the I-94 site for your travel records
• H: Number of days that you were present in each of 2020, 2021 or 2022 (partial days count as a full day) - note that you should get professional tax help if (Days in 2022) x1 + (Days in 2021) x1/3 + (Days in 2020) x1/6 >= 183, since you meet the Substantial Presence Test and may be a U.S. tax resident
• I, J, K: expected to be no, leave the second Yes/No for both J and K blank
• L: Leave blank
• M: Leave blank

Job done!

Congratulations! You finished completing the forms! The next step is to submit the forms to the IRS, briefly here are the four options:

• Book an appt by phone and show up in person to an IRS Taxpayer Assistance Center in the USA, must have completed all docs and bring them to appt (no mailing required), you do not need a certified copy of your passport.
• Mail in your forms along with the original copy of your passport (the IRS will return it by mail)
• Mail in your forms along with a Certified True Copy of the passport, obtainable from Service Canada in-person or by mail. You will need to write a short letter to Service Canada telling them you need a certified copy of your passport e.g. "I am requesting a certified copy of my passport as the US Internal Revenue Service requires a certified true copy of a travel document. This document will be used as proof of identity in the application of a Tax Identification number needed to file a US Non-Resident Income Tax Return."
• Apply via a Certified Acceptance Agent ($$$)

Mailing instructions:

Mail signed W-7, signed 1040NR, Schedule 1, Schedule OI and proof of identity (e.g. original passport or certified true copy of passport) to:
Internal Revenue Service
ITIN Operation
P.O. Box 149342
Austin, TX 78714-9342
USA
Suggested method is via registered mail with Canada Post (~$15), for proof of delivery and tracking. If you are using a private courier (e.g. UPS, FedEx, etc.) use the mailing address on Pg 6 of the W-7 instructions.

IRS Taxpayer Assistance Center - In-Person Appointment

You can submit your forms in-person at an IRS Taxpayer Assistance Center (TAC), located across the USA and available by appointment only during normal business hours. Applying at a TAC saves you from having to mail in your original passport or paying for a certified true copy of your passport.
Call 844-545-5640 to schedule an appointment in advance, up to 2 months before, you will need one appointment per person, even if they are your spouse. Some people have reported difficulty calling from a Canadian phone number, and have been able to obtain success using a VoiP to make the appointment. Others have also reported success from calling 267-941-1000 (not a toll-free number) and letting the phone agent transfer you to the proper line. If the lines are busy, you will need to keep trying until you get through - I would recommend calling with a couple different phones until you get through.
You will need to bring your passport, as well as a duplicate copy of your forms so they can stamp them as received. Upon completion, they will inform you that you will receive a letter letting you know of your ITIN application results mailed to your home.
Appointment length differs based on the agent that serves you. There are data points that go from 20 minutes per person up to 1 hour. Some data points indicate that the clerk at the TAC may confuse your application with another reason of registering for an ITIN (e.g. meeting the substantial presence test). Remember that the clerk's role is to make sure your application is complete before submission, and they do not make any determination on your ITIN application. Kindly remind them that the reason you are filing is to file a tax return (the 1040NR) and that you need it submitted to the ITIN group for their consideration.

Payment

As noted previously, you will owe a small amount of tax to the IRS. Comprehensive instructions on how to pay your US taxes are online.
You can either pay with filing of your 1040NR, or after you receive your ITIN. The easiest way may be to obtain a $USD money order from a Canadian bank (TD, BMO and HSBC are all capable of this), and submitting it with your TAC appointment, or the mailing of your application.
If you have a U.S. bank account (not a $USD account at a Canadian bank) you can also pay by online banking, but only after you obtain an ITIN.
From my own research, if you have a BMO premium chequing account (account fees waived for a minimum balance of $6,000), you're eligible for a BMO $USD chequing account (no fees for withdrawals/deposits), and $USD money orders issued at no fee.

Aren't I Late on filing/paying my taxes for 2022?

If you are concerned about filing your 2022 after the April 18, 2023 filing deadline, it appears from Form 2210 that there is no penalties due if your income is less than $1,000. You will still owe interest on late payment, you can add $2 or $3 to the amount you owe to cover.

I lost my ITIN Letter!

If you lose your ITIN or your ITIN letter, you can get the ITIN by calling the IRS at +1 267-941-1000 and provide your name, mailing address, birthdate. You can then request a generic letter with your ITIN to help you with proof of your ITIN.

ITIN Expiry

Your ITIN will expire. I have not seen any evidence of them reassigning an ITIN to someone else yet, but the possibility exists.

End note

This post was written for free. I'd appreciate it if you would spend a moment to share your timeline (application, ITIN letter, return of proof of identity) and any additional tips you think should be noted! Appreciate the thought. :)

Questions? I do follow this thread. Please post in this thread, do not DM me.

Also, PM me your faxes.

I have over 100 known alters. Each alter can be assigned to one or more roles (like Food intake Specialist, Trusted Memory writer, Etc.) but only be assigned to a single department (which are broad functional groups such as security, Information Technology, Web Development, etc.).
In an effort to know who’s who and what they do, and how to reach them internally I have built a database in FileMaker Pro 12 which internally we’ve called Hologram 360®.
Along with all the information specified above, the software has a picture (generated by Craiyon.com) of each alter so like a badge photo, their contact information such extension, internal IM, and primary department. Also attached to each one are preferences (favorite color, favorite kind of music, preference of mac or PC, preference of Android or iOS, do they want children or to be married, preference of Pepsi or coke, default McDonalds, chipotle, Burger King, Taco Bell, and other orders.
For departments it tracks department code (a unique 2-5 letter code that identifies the department in reports (examples include: CC=“Customer Care”, ESD=“Enterprise Security Department”, ITS=“Information Technology Services”, etc.), a friendly name which is the full name as specified in the department code examples, a queue extension (transfer code), what kind of response is that department (Direct Transfer, Ticket, Callback, Social), and whether or not the department is “public facing” or not.
Prior to this we were managing on an excel spreadsheet which got very unwieldy very quickly (try to add a new attribute like favorite color, whether or not that individual is mandated to sign in, etc. and having to then mass update that was not fun)
We can also run reports (all holograms sorted by department, show all who don’t have a photo (grouped by department), all holograms with photo grouped by department (Visual eDirectory®), etc.)
So what do you think? Do you think a database is the right solution? Would you be interested in seeing screenshots of Hologram 360®? Do you have a different solution for managing large numbers of alters efficiently?
I’d love to hear your thoughts on this idea.

35/f, late diagnosis as combined type adhd (though i am more inattentive than impulsive)
i am the firstborn with two siblings, to an evangelical born-again christian dad and more moderately christian mom. my dad grew more fundamental with time and when i was in high school i declared my atheism after getting into punk music and reading the communist manifesto and feeling like christianity was quite harmful in many ways. my dad responded by forcing me to go to bible study and church each week otherwise i wouldn’t get to drive my car (bought myself) for the week, which was a hefty consequence considering i had severe anxiety around riding the bus.
i loathed the small, homogenous midwest town i grew up in and was something of a loner. i was put in the academically gifted classes in middle school but felt stupid in comparison to the other kids and didn’t achieve the high grades they did because i didn’t really care and didn’t enjoy being the only freshman amongst juniors and seniors in many of my classes once high school came. my primary focus was getting out of there once i graduated and that’s exactly what i did.
right after high school i spent the summer in romania volunteering in an orphanage. though i’d always been shy (i was the kid that adults would constantly make the joke, “i wish you would stop talking already!” because i was incredibly quiet unless i knew you, then i could be accused of being a motormouth), i always felt comfortable around young children and was a natural caregiver. I particularly loved (and love) babies.
I studied photography and fine art in college and grad school because i always felt like i contained a lot inside that i needed a way to make it external and bridge my inside and outside. the work i made was always deeply personal, so i never really considered making a career out of it, except becoming a teacher but that fell to the wayside as it seemed the only thing i could make decent money at was nannying.
i’ve been a career nanny for 15 years now and am pregnant with my first child now. it feels amazing to be realizing my greatest dream, that i always somehow thought i wouldn’t be able to do (for no reason other than a strange self-imposed “i can’t get what i want most” complex)
I used to describe myself as ambitious but really i’m more of a dreamer; ultimately i care little about my profession and seek mostly a comfortable existence with plenty of time with my loved ones and spare time to explore my various curiosities and connect with nature. it took me a really long time to realize being a mom was my main ambition, and have thought of pursuing a number of career paths but mostly i like studying and going to school.
the older i get the more introverted i feel, i used to live in big cities but in my 30s have been trying to move away and into more rural areas. i tend to avoid crowded events and definitely like more intimate social events.
i am artistic, but moreso creative. i have nothing but ideas but it’s hard for me to execute most of them. i like craft type activities, such as using plants to dye fabric, pressing flowers, and making jewelry. i absolutely loved darkroom photography but it isn’t something i can afford to do anymore. the art i make typically starts from an idea and the medium comes after—i’ve worked in video, sound, photo, sculpture, installation etc.
like other adhd-er’s i have hobbies i will focus on to the extreme and then will drop by the wayside once it’s lost my interest. i spent a couple of years really digging into genealogy and doing ancestral research in order to have a spiritual connection to them. i built a family tree in the thousands and used dna to further identify relatives when paper trails went cold. i love investigative challenges such as these and have a strong left brained side that feels sometimes at odds with my right brained creative/more chaotic energy but ideally i spend time engaging with both of these equally otherwise i get quite bored.
another passion of mine is astrology. i was quite skeptical of anything “woo” after being raised in such a harmfully religious way, but around 28 i started studying on my own and my interest still has never waned. i hope to write a book about genealogical and family astrology someday as this has been a good chunk of my research. i enjoy helping people learn more about themselves or see themselves differently by reading their chart.
i absolutely tend towards people pleasing and am very agreeable unless i’m quite comfortable with a person, which is a few and far between type relationship for me. i think part of this is being very conflict avoidant and wanting to be liked and seen as less intense than i truly am. as i mentioned before, i feel a lot under the surface and i definitely struggled with my mental health as a teenager and young adult. i identified strongly with the crazy/mentally ill woman stereotype from an early age, perhaps because my aunt passed due to suicide while i was a child and i was constantly told how similar i was to her. i feel a pressure to keep things more surface level and talk about inane things that don’t interest me because it’s rare for me to find people that want to talk about the things i’m interested in. and i don’t necessarily need to discuss my interest with others also.
in a similar way, i would never describe myself as a leader. i feel quite uncomfortable in leadership roles. i typically do my best work when left alone.
there are two types i usually receive when i take online tests, but i’d rather see what input i get before staying them. (perhaps it’s pretty obvious though?)
thank you for reading this far if you’re still with me and for any input you might have!

This is the best tl;dr I could make, original reduced by 69%. (I'm a bot)

Disgruntled North Koreans are lashing out against police corruption by openly protesting against them and in some cases beating officers, according to a local government official who saw a secret document detailing the cases.
"Not long ago, I came across a secret document containing surprising information. Between July and December of last year, dozens of incidents of people protesting against the tyranny of police, or even extracting revenge by beating them up have occurred here in Ryanggang province," an administrative official in the northern province told Radio Free Asia on condition of anonymity for security reasons.
The document had details on several violent attacks on police officers, he said.
"A resident from Paegam county and his son cornered a police officer on the roadside and he inflicted severe bruises on the officer's head," the official said.
The already struggling economy took a turn for the worse during the COVID-19 pandemic, and citizens who once tolerated the police making bribery rounds are now fed up, sources tell RFA. In another incident, in the city of Hyesan, an officer stopped a driver and demanded gasoline and cash when the driver did not have the sufficient documents for driving on hand.
The cases reported in the document show that some citizens are so far past their breaking points that they are willing to disregard the risk they take when they go after the police.

Summary Source FAQ Feedback Top keywords: police^#1 officer^#2 against^#3 document^#4 people^#5
Post found in /worldnews.
NOTICE: This thread is for discussing the submission topic. Please do not discuss the concept of the autotldr bot here.

Modern women have no sexual restraints Modern dating created hookup culture No strings attached Polyamory Immaturity, no responsibility Dating apps So women have unlimited choice Men make the first move but women make the final decision Women choose only 5% of men The same 5% they’re all sleeping with These 5% of men need not commit Leaving women alone And 95% of men with absolutely nothing So everyone is alone But women will blame all men But it’s down to women to improve their standards Naked photos online Flaunting themselves Prostituting themselves But demanding not to be objectified Having the audacity to expect a gentleman And then proceed to proclaim good men no longer exist They do exist They are in the 95% they are ignoring And these men are simply staying away from them Because they’re not ladies Only a lady can have the right to demand a gentleman Only a lady is what a gentleman will want Double standards Equality And they reach their 30s Their 40s Still single and alone Far more difficult to find someone Limited Baggage Appearances now faded Can’t rely on beauty What do they have to offer? They don’t ask themselves this Women expect to be chased To be spoilt To be treated as special Superior, not equal But men need to supply everything Charm, wit, success, status, kindness, masculinity, but not toxic What about toxic femininity? Perhaps men are the prize? Young, decent men are realising this And they are staying single and saving their dignity and saving their money and saving their sanity They can find someone later They can have children later But the women can’t And then they’ll be begging for the men they ignored But these men still won’t want them, even less so at this later age And these women will only have themselves to blame And is there any wonder young men suffer Depression Constantly being told they’re bad They’re useless They should be guilty Because all men are the same, right? On what basis? What logic? One or two bad experiences Just like men experience with toxic women But they can’t blame anyone Only other men It’s all they have So they are left alone and miserable And men can’t talk because it’s shameful among men And unattractive to women Too toxic if they hold in their emotions Too soft if they reveal any weakness So the suicide rate among them continues to increase They no longer know the rules Confused Crossed wires Childhood teachings programmed now being attempted to be deconstructed So everyone is unhappy and single And really All they want Is what past generations had What their parents and grandparents had Black and white footage Romance Class But they’re so wrapped up in convincing themselves old traditions are bad This is progress Is it? Dating and flirting and mating has decreased Parenting has decreased Security and happiness will decrease Good luck to everyone We created this And women need to take accountability for something at their fault for once They need to accept the truth To listen to a different argument They need to start thinking for themselves Educating themselves Reading for themselves Not listening to other women that don’t want the best for them but are simply angry at men For reasons unexplained It’s misandry It’s hate No wonder love is so far away for so many No wonder there is an emptiness that lies so heavy in our modern culture Put your phone down and talk to people Give people a chance And stop selling yourself cheap Respect can only be earned by self-respect Increase your value this way Not from materialism and superficial charm Your job and car isn’t what is going to attract the perfect person for you And it goes without saying the popular degrading television shows and overwhelming overload of pornography has played a huge part in this Social media Comparison and unrealistic desire Desensitising us all Swipe swipe swipe The grass is always greener on the other side Sometimes it isn’t Sometimes you have ignored the grass for so long it has dried Browned Died Put your phone down Be yourself Be authentic Be decent Fakeness is ugly Having no shame is unattractive

Credit for the original story goes to u/spacepaladin15. I have to say, this was easily my favorite chapter to write. I hope you enjoy!
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Memory transcript subject: Trish, Venlil civilian
Date [Standardized Human Time]: February 29th, 2177
Location: Lower sprawl of City 23, Venlil Prime
It was a long drive back down to the Den, and the whole group held their breath for every second of it with spines bristling and skin crawling. To all of them, it felt like exterminators might appear behind them at any moment if they let themselves relax for so much as a second. The only noise (aside from the whiny roar of the engine) was the hiss of a spray bottle, as James disinfected the wound at Sasha’s side with some mild antiseptic and threw a light cover of bandages over the whole affair. Those aside, the vehicle was filled with a deathly silence.
By the time they were back at the Tipped Quill, even Beast seemed cowed. Trish set it down in the adjacent side-alley, and its doors opened without so much as a screech of the unoiled hinges. They silently disembarked for the bar with all the cheer of a funeral procession, each of them constantly sneaking looks behind them. James and Burai were in front, Tressa and Trish in back, with Sasha and the cargo shielded from all angles as though they were under attack. The thick tension in the air further silenced their movements, leaving only the sound of the ashen wind outside as they walked.
​
As soon as the door to the Den slid shut behind them, the tension snapped. A roar of exuberant emotion from every angle nearly pushed Trish to the ground, as the rest of them erupted with cheers. It was like being at the center of a supernova, a feeling of being crushed from all angles. Trish just barely managed to stay upright from the sudden shock, ears failing to adjust for several seconds to the new baseline of noise.
“—and just threw himself at them, crying some sob story about a human hunting him. And they bought it! They actually bought it!”
“No shit they bought it! What were they gonna do, let an opportunity to put those flamers to work pass them by?”
“You know, there was a fire escape ladder on the other side of the building. If you’d let me say something before jumping, maybe I wouldn’t need to pull this quill out of your side.”
“You and I both know we— mhfff— didn’t have that sort of time. ”
The dizzying whirl of socialization around her faded into a manageable hum, nervous sharp laughter giving way to more gentle chuckles as the adrenaline faded. Trish managed to drag herself to a chair, nausea fading but legs still shaky from the sudden outburst. She should’ve thought to bring earplugs.
“Hey Trish, you good? You’re looking pretty faint yourself…” James wrapped up his work and paced over to her, his face a bizarre mix of mirth and concern.
“Fine, I’m fine. Just a lot of noise, that’s all. Is Sasha OK?”
“Yeah, just a spine in her side from that fall. It didn’t get past skin, so she’ll be just fine. Here, why don’t I get you some… hmmm, how do you feel about champagne?”
“I don’t— Champagne?”
He grinned, almost literally ear-to-ear. “Yeah, ‘course! Or cider, if that’s more your style. You know, this is a big occasion! A mysterious unmarked bag from the same contact who got us those pistols last time, we can afford a bit of celebration!”
“...Cider sounds good. This has human amounts of alcohol, right? I don’t want to dull my perception if anything comes up.”
“Relax, relax! You’re acting like there’s a squad of exterminators waiting ‘till we’re drunk to kick the door down. Trust me, it’s all downhill from here! Here, let me get you a glass…”
—
The backpack was set upon a footrest, and all lamps trained on it to make a sort of spotlight. To a rapt and silent audience, Trish walked up to their little makeshift shrine and carefully unzipped the gray fabric.
After only a couple hours and far fewer drinks than might be expected, curiosity had gotten the better of them. They all knew it would be better to wait until morning to see what was in the backpack; for something as potentially monumental as this, being well-rested and sober would be invaluable. They kept their curiosity at bay for long, agonizing hours. But it couldn’t hold. Burai made some joke about holding a ceremony to open the thing, and that was all the push they needed.
Inside the backpack, an expensive-looking technological box lay cushioned in a nest of nondescript white fabric. Trish mercilessly gutted the bag, lifting the contents up high for all to see for a moment before placing the device on the spot where the backpack had set seconds prior. After a moment’s inspection, she found a clearly-marked button on the side which she pushed without so much as a moment’s consideration. A hiss of air and a blink from the green light on the side, and the entire box split in two before sliding open. The blast of heat from the inside made Trish recoil slightly. She peered in.
Her gaze was met by a small oval, glistening slightly under the light of heating elements and LEDs. Blue, glossy with a slightly rough texture, and barely the size of Trish’s paw. She ran a claw across the side; tiny bumps coated the surface. It was extremely warm to the touch. With great care, she lifted it from its metal cocoon and held it up for the rest of the group to see what exactly they’d risked life and limb for.
​
The only person who seemed to recognize it was Sasha, who all but collapsed at the sight. Mouth covered with a hand, eyes wide and frantic, breathing unsteady. Burai practically dragged her to a nearby chair.
“W-What the fuck? How? How!?”
“Sasha, are you—”
Without waiting for Burai’s question to finish, Tressa rushed over to her and practically tackled her with a hug. He was coming at her from an awkward angle, so rather than a graceful embrace, it ended up with him sliding down an arm head over tail. Undeterred, he righted himself and wrapped his tail around her shaking hand.
“Sasha, breath. Five seconds in, five seconds hold, five seconds out, remember? We’ve got you.”
Gradually, her breathing stabilized, and her hands began to steady. Her eyes, however, remained wild and dilated, still roughly focusing on the small blue object in Trish’s paws. After several long seconds, she finally took the hint and carefully set it back in the case.
“Sasha, talk to me. What is it?”
Sasha’s voice was still unsteady, hands still slightly trembling as she pointed at the container. “...What is it? Do… any of you know what that is? What you’ve brought?”
“It’s an egg, isn’t it? I mean, it’s in an incu—”
“It’s an Arxur.”
“...What?”
“That’s an Arxur’s egg.”
Her words rang out like a gunshot, leaving still silence in its wake as the rest of the group processed the meaning behind them. Each person went through a set of reactions in series, timings offset. Shock, disbelief, denial, awe. Their faces and tails formed a silent orchestra of emotion.
Burai was the first to recover, and the first to speak. “How are we going to feed it?”
Sasha looked at him as though he had three heads.
“Well, it’s not like we can get synthesized meat anymore… there’s not exactly anywhere it could hunt, either. Maybe we—”
“Feed it? What fucking part of Arxur don’t you understand!? This is the same species that tore… Burai, you were there! On the cradle, you saw what they did! You should remember better than anyone! They had no empathy, no morals… They killed for fun, ate children out of their parent’s arms! And you want to…”
Sasha’s voice broke, but she continued. “...you want to raise it?”
Burai met her gaze but did not answer. In a truly rare moment, he seemed to be at a loss for words. Sasha looked around at the rest of them; they all wore the same look of determination and all failed to justify their decision with so much as a whisper of argument.
“You want to raise it?” she repeated again, louder this time, as though questioning them at higher volume would make them realize the error of their ways. “Do you think it’ll love you because you were the one feeding it flesh from birth? And… then what? What about every other species in this goddamn ash heap, will it love them enough to starve itself?” She looked around expectantly, but was met with the same steel glares.
“Well? Say something!” she spat. “Any of you!”
​
“Sasha…” Burai began gently, “Do you remember when Cilany’s interview first leaked?”
It was Sasha’s turn to go silent with a cold glare, apparently not seeing where the question led. The rest of the room shuddered; they’d heard the story before. He continued regardless. “The news that the Gojid once ate meat… it hit a lot of people hard. I was in a refugee shelter on Earth at the time. Nobody took it well. Nobody even talked for days afterwards. I heard a couple people tore out their claws and tried to remove their teeth. And there was this one kid… Teveq.
“He was so energetic, always off doing something. With the pups, usually, keeping them out of trouble. Or praying. He prayed to the Great Protector every night for his family to be found hiding somewhere on the cradle. Or sketching, buildings and burrows and skyscrapers. He wanted to be an architect, told me about it a few times. He was always so chatty… he kept me company when I couldn’t even bear to get out of bed. I found him in his room a couple days after we learned. He had a gun to his head.
“He didn’t pull the trigger, but it didn’t make a difference. He stopped eating, stopped talking. He stopped crying too after a few days, and he was just a breathing corpse, a corpse that lost more and more weight each day. He didn’t even pray anymore. The god he’d prayed to for protection hated him.
“When the Kolshians surrounded Earth, he didn’t leave. He wanted to burn. He thought he deserved it, because his people once ate meat.”
Sasha’s look of rage was replaced with sheer horror, but he wasn’t done. “The Federation killed him. Tore out his heart and soul, and incinerated what was left. Not just him, either. Nobody knows what the Gojid were once like before the Federation ‘cured’ us of our meat-eating sins. Nobody knows what we could’ve been, if the Kolshians had used their forces to save the cradle. Maybe they wouldn’t have done so even now, for our status as cured predators.
“The unhatched Arxur sitting on the chair; was it on the cradle? Did it personally kill Gojid? Or do you want us to kill it, burn it in cold blood just because its people once ate meat?”
This, finally, managed to shake Sasha from her stunned silence. Her rebuke was a far cry from the snarling fury she’d held just minutes ago, but she tried to make her voice firm. “Once ate meat? The Arxur can only eat meat, flesh they—”
“The Arxur are dead. They are dead, except for this little unhatched lizard. A being which has committed no sins, except by virtue of being born with a carnivorous digestive system. An innocent child, which represents everything the Federation tried to burn.”
The room was silent for several minutes. Sasha sat with her head buried in her hands, occasionally stealing glances at the container within which the egg sat and the Gojid sitting across from her. Each time, she wordlessly returned to her stance with a fresh layer of unease across her face.
A voice broke the silence. Shaky, muffled and laden with apprehension. Still, it sounded somehow firm, as though it had reached some sort of conclusion. Sasha sat up slightly straighter, though she kept her face covered.
“How… how are you going to feed it?”
—
Memory transcript subject: Burai, Gojid business owner
Date [Standardized Human Time]: February 30th, 2177
Location: Lower sprawl of City 23, Venlil Prime
The rest of the group was already asleep downstairs, but Burai couldn’t make himself sleep. He’d dragged himself up to the empty bar and gotten back to work; though physically tired, the flame in his soul wouldn’t let him rest until it burned out. His passionate argument from earlier still filled his spirit with a fire which couldn’t be extinguished; he could at least put it to work tackling the awful pile of now-dried sludge he’d left for himself to clean up later.
There wasn’t much else for it to do, even if the rest of them were still awake. Sasha had conceded to not interfere with raising the Arxur; although she still wasn’t exactly thrilled about the prospect of one living at the Den, Burai’s defense had clearly knocked the wind out of her sails as far as killing it was concerned. The rest of them, having never lived in a world where the Arxur were a spectre of death and agony, were fully onboard from minute one. He might have to hold them back from cutting off their own fingers to feed the hatchling. After nearly an hour of debate, they still hadn’t established where they could get food for it.
A sharp knock on the door interrupted his thoughts and forced him to leave his task before completion once again. In his exhausted state, he nearly opened the door without even thinking. His claw was on the handle before he remembered that he’d left the hidden door to the Den wide open. He dragged himself over to the switch and lazily jabbed it, pointedly ignoring the knocks as they became more insistent.
Finally, once his little show of security theater was concluded to his liking, he sauntered back towards the door. One claw smoothed out his quills absentmindedly. He knew he probably looked like a wreck, although he didn’t have a mirror to prove it. Hopefully, whoever was outside wouldn’t take much notice. He unlocked the door and slipped it open.
“Hey! We’re closed today, but—”
​
[Subject death detected Memory transcription ended]
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Welcome back to the legacy of TWICE! This is a series which highlights the iconic girl-group's journey (music, achievements, sales, charting etc.) over the years. I have also included some of my own thoughts on their music and career in these posts and would love to hear any thoughts you guys have as well!
The previous parts of this series that I posted in twice can be found here: Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6

2021

TWICE started the beginning of the year 2021 by greeting us with a spellbinding performance of Depend on You, as part of Time 100 Talks series held by Time magazine.
They would then hold their 2nd online concert "Twice in Wonderland" on March 6^th. It is here that they announced the release of the song, which would go on to make ONCE everywhere lose control of their heart and soul.
Kura Kura - Released on May 12th, 2021

Kura Kura	Strawberry Moon

Recommendations and Thoughts

• Kura Kura - It's MV is one of the most visually stunning things I have seen in K-pop. There are many moments in the video where you can pause and it would feel like you are looking at a photo displayed in an exhibition. The song itself is a beautifully sung track, full of energy, that you can loop forever!
• Strawberry Moon - There is a theory that I have made up in my mind, which I call the "TWICE Treasure Hunt". This theory states that whenever TWICE creates a truly amazing Japanese song, they will bury it under single album releases, so that the only people to find it would be the most avid fans. I believe Strawberry Moon was one of the songs picked for the TWICE treasure hunt (amongst others like Scorpion, Catch a Wave etc.). This song is the definition of catchy! There is this perfect way in which the song flows, the way in which it transitions from the voice of one member to the other, that makes the song just perfect! Nayeon's first line in the pre-chorus especially stands out to me (Ano shunkan de toki wo tometeta), due to how beautiful it sounds.

​
Soon after this, JYP Entertainment announced the group's upcoming mini-album, slated to be released in June 2021. Before the release, TWICE appeared on the Kelly Clarkson Show and gave a powerful performance for their 2020 hit Cry for Me.
June arrived, meaning it was now time for TWICE to take over summer, and for us to go ...... Alcohol-Free?!
Taste of Love - Released on June 11^th, 2021

Alcohol-Free	First Time	Scandal
Conversation	Baby Blue Love	SOS

Lyrics contribution: Dahyun - Scandal, SOS ; Jihyo - First Time; Sana - Conversation; Nayeon - Baby Blue Love
Charting and Sales
The album would earn them their them their 1st top 10 charting in the Billboard 200, debuting at #6. With this, Twice became the first female Korean act to chart an EP within the top 10 of the Billboard 200, and just the second female Korean act to have a top 10 album in the chart.
The album recorded a total of 530,000 pre-order sales, debuted on the weekly Gaon Album Chart at #2 and claimed the #1 spot on both Billboard World Albums and Top Album Sales charts.
The lead single Alcohol-Free attained peaks of #6 on the Gaon Digital Chart and #7 on the K-pop Hot 100 Chart.
Recommendations and Thoughts

• Alcohol-Free - Aah yes, our generation's summer anthem! This song has a uncanny effect of making me feel bright and happy, anytime I listen to it. It literally embodies the spirit of the summer season in its lyrics, in its instrumentals, in its music video, and in everything else. Alcohol-Free is appropriately shot at Korea's favorite holiday destination Jeju Island. The MV features the members bathed in sunlight, surrounded by bright summery colors and an assortment of gorgeous looking drinks! This, coupled with the song's bossa-nova sounds make it such a joyful and refreshing experience to watch!

Wishing everyone listening to this song a very happy summer, full of mimosas and pina-coladas :P

• Scandal - A literal masterpiece with one of the best pre-choruses in K-pop! That's how I can describe this song. It has a sort of relaxed but also slightly sultry feel to it and when the pre-chorus hits, it just puts you in a trance! The way it builds and the way it ends is all soo perfect, and I hope people unfamiliar with the song would give it a listen. It's brilliant!
• SOS - A very catchy and vibey B-side. Worth a listen!

​
The group would keep their momentum going (typical TWICE!), and in the very next month would release their 3rd Japanese studio album titled:
Perfect World - Released on July 28^th, 2021

Perfect World	Better	Good at Love
Fanfare	Kura Kura	Four-leaf Clover
In the Summer	Pieces of Love	Thank You, Family
Promise

Charting and Sales
The album debuted at #2 on the Oricon Album Chart and #1 on the Billboard Japan Hot Albums Chart.
Recommendations and Thoughts

• Perfect World - Now this one is a powerful and hard hitting song!! There are no soft portions or slow elements, the song just goes "BAM! Here you go!!" . True to the theme, the members also deliver the performance for this song with an unparalleled level of swagger and attitude! My reaction when I first heard Perfect World is actually perfectly displayed in the MV itself, where people are freaking out and losing their mind, as they watch TWICE performs on a burning stage.
• Thank You, Family & Promise - If you are amongst the small minority of K-pop fans who like soft, vocal-focused songs and ballads, then these are the songs for you. These songs feel very soothing and calming to me, and help me just appreciate the members' beautiful vocals. These songs don't try to incorporate too many elements that compete for your attention, they just keep it nice and simple and help you appreciate what is presented to you.

​
With the schedule for Perfect World wrapped up, it was now time for TWICE to establish themselves as a global powerhouse and solidify their footprint in the west. And how would they go about doing it? Well, the answer to that could be found in a prom invitation titled:
The Feels - released on October 1^st, 2021
Charting and Sales
The Feels would become TWICE's first song to chart on the Billiboard Hot 100, debuting at #83. It would also feature on the UK Singles Chart, peaking at #80, on the Billboard Global 200 at #12, on the Canadian Hot 100 at #56 and on #3 on both the Billboard Japan Hot 100 and Oricon's Combined Singles Chart.
It accumulated 50.9 million global streams and 8,800 global downloads in its very first week. In the United States alone, the song garnered 4.7 million streams, 208,000 radio impressions, and 10,400 digital sales in its first week.
Thoughts
This is a true TWICE song! If I had never listened to it before and someone gave me 4 guesses about the artist, I would guess TWICE all 4 times. This song has every element that had made me fall in love with their music for the first time. It is energetic, upbeat and happy, it's MV is bright and poppy, it has a memorable choreography and it has those very short rap verses that always add a little more fun to the song.
There is nothing more I could say, The Feels is as true to the TWICE theme as one can get and I love TWICE, hence I love this song!
​
The group would then begin preparations of their next release:- for an album which would become one of their most successful, critically acclaimed and widely loved works (and which would start a chain of countless restocking demands from fans :P). I'm of course talking about their 3rd Korean studio album, titled:-
Formula of Love: O+T=＜3 - released on November 12th, 2021

Scientist	Moonlight	Icon
Cruel	Real You	F.I.L.A. (Fall in Love Again)
Last Waltz	Espresso	Rewind
Cactus	Push & Pull (Jihyo, Sana, Dahyun)	Hello (Nayeon, Momo, Chaeyoung)
1, 3, 2 (Jeongyeon, Mina, Tzuyu)	Candy	The Feels

Lyrics contribution: Dahyun - Cruel ; Jihyo - Real You, Cactus; Nayeon - Fall in Love Again
Charting and Sales
FOL was a massive success, garnering a surplus of 700,000 pre-order sales, making it TWICE's highest selling album till then. The album charted at #3 on the Billboard 200, marking a new peak for the group and it also continued its charting for 8 consecutive weeks on the Billboard 200.
It also debuted at #1 on South Korea's Gaon Album Chart, making it Twice's tenth number-one album on the chart. In Japan, it peaked at #17 on Billboard Japan's Hot Albums chart and at #2 on Oricon's Albums Chart. It also peaked at #1 on the Billboard World Album chart and #2 on Billboard Top Album Sales chart.
In Europe, the album appeared on Belgium's Ultratop Flanders and Wallonia 200 Albums, Finland's Top 50 Albums, Lithuania's Top 100 Albums, the Netherlands' Album Top 100, and the UK's Album Downloads Chart.
Recommendations and Thoughts

• Scientist - It's just a very fun and quirky song! I know the community opinion may not be in its favor, but to me, its still very enjoyable!
• Icon - This is their most badass song till date!! The lyrics are unapologetic, hard-hitting and frankly brilliant! This, coupled with the amazing synth music and the insane drop - "I ain't going nowhere, I'm an icon; When all them other nobodies are long gone", makes this song truly iconic!! Mina herself said that the song is about expressing the iconic side of you without hesitation and it honestly can't be described any better. Icon is definitely one of my favorite B-Sides of all time.
• Last Waltz - I don't know what it is about Latin music inspired K-pop songs that make me love them so much, I just know that I do! "Mm-mm-mm-mm (My la-a-ast); Mm-mm-mm-mm (My la-a-ast); Meomchuji malgo just let it flo-o-ow" and the bridge portion after has gripped me since the first time I listened to it, and it will not be going away anytime soon!
• 1, 3, 2 (Jeongyeon, Mina, Tzuyu) - Their three voices mesh together unbelievably well, to create something which I can only describe as art. This song honestly made me realize how parts of a song being distributed between multiple people, rather than being sung by a single person, can help improve the song so much. It probably won't happen, but I'm praying for a JeongMiTzu subunit in the future.
• F.I.L.A. (Fall in Love Again) - A really chill and catchy dance song!

​
It was finally December and time for another year to come to an end. TWICE must have thought that they should wrap the year with a bang, because they went and released a banger!
Doughnut - released on December 15th, 2021

Doughnut	Wonderful Day

Charting and Sales
Doughnut peaked at #3 on the Oricon singles chart and at #6 on the Billboard Japan Hot 100
Recommendations and Thoughts

• Doughnut - This is my favorite Japanese release by TWICE and one of my favorite songs of all time.

1. The song is a soft, city-pop ballad, but is interjected by powerful high notes between verses and in the bridge. This makes it so that your mind is engaged with beautiful vocals throughout the song but as soon as those high notes hit, it pulls your attention instantly and makes you realize what you have been listening to, before transitioning back to the soothing and beautiful tones. This creates a highly unique and amazing listening experience and makes the song so memorable.
2. The MV encapsulates the winter theme perfectly, with the beautiful ice themed set, the snow special effects and with the members looking like angels. When this is coupled with the song itself, it makes you feel like you are watching a fairy tale set in a winter wonderland. It's just perfect!

Awards, Achievements and Recognitions

• TWICE secured 4 music show wins for Alcohol Free and 2 music show wins for Scientist.
• TWICE became the first Korean female act to debut chart an EP in the top 10 of the Billboard 200.
• The Feels became TWICE's first song to chart in the Billboard Hot 100.

Thanks for reading! Please feel free to discuss and share your thoughts on TWICE's 2021, and what music/events you liked most from that time.

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Welcome back to the legacy of TWICE! This is a series which highlights the iconic girl-group's journey (music, achievements, sales, charting etc.) over the years. I have also included some of my own thoughts on their music and career in these posts and would love to hear any thoughts you guys have as well!
The previous parts of this series that I posted in kpopthoughts can be found here: Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6

2021

TWICE started the beginning of the year 2021 by greeting us with a spellbinding performance of Depend on You, as part of Time 100 Talks series held by Time magazine.
They would then hold their 2nd online concert "Twice in Wonderland" on March 6^th. It is here that they announced the release of the song, which would go on to make ONCE everywhere lose control of their heart and soul.
Kura Kura - Released on May 12th, 2021

Kura Kura	Strawberry Moon

Recommendations and Thoughts

• Kura Kura - It's MV is one of the most visually stunning things I have seen in K-pop. There are many moments in the video where you can pause and it would feel like you are looking at a photo displayed in an exhibition. The song itself is a beautifully sung track, full of energy, that you can loop forever!
• Strawberry Moon - There is a theory that I have made up in my mind, which I call the "TWICE Treasure Hunt". This theory states that whenever TWICE creates a truly amazing Japanese song, they will bury it under single album releases, so that the only people to find it would be the most avid fans. I believe Strawberry Moon was one of the songs picked for the TWICE treasure hunt (amongst others like Scorpion, Catch a Wave etc.). This song is the definition of catchy! There is this perfect way in which the song flows, the way in which it transitions from the voice of one member to the other, that makes the song just perfect! Nayeon's first line in the pre-chorus especially stands out to me (Ano shunkan de toki wo tometeta), due to how beautiful it sounds.

​
Soon after this, JYP Entertainment announced the group's upcoming mini-album, slated to be released in June 2021. Before the release, TWICE appeared on the Kelly Clarkson Show and gave a powerful performance for their 2020 hit Cry for Me.
June arrived, meaning it was now time for TWICE to take over summer, and for us to go ...... Alcohol-Free?!
Taste of Love - Released on June 11^th, 2021

Alcohol-Free	First Time	Scandal
Conversation	Baby Blue Love	SOS

Lyrics contribution: Dahyun - Scandal, SOS ; Jihyo - First Time; Sana - Conversation; Nayeon - Baby Blue Love
Charting and Sales
The album would earn them their them their 1st top 10 charting in the Billboard 200, debuting at #6. With this, Twice became the first female Korean act to chart an EP within the top 10 of the Billboard 200, and just the second female Korean act to have a top 10 album in the chart.
The album recorded a total of 530,000 pre-order sales, debuted on the weekly Gaon Album Chart at #2 and claimed the #1 spot on both Billboard World Albums and Top Album Sales charts.
The lead single Alcohol-Free attained peaks of #6 on the Gaon Digital Chart and #7 on the K-pop Hot 100 Chart.
Recommendations and Thoughts

• Alcohol-Free - Aah yes, our generation's summer anthem! This song has a uncanny effect of making me feel bright and happy, anytime I listen to it. It literally embodies the spirit of the summer season in its lyrics, in its instrumentals, in its music video, and in everything else. Alcohol-Free is appropriately shot at Korea's favorite holiday destination Jeju Island. The MV features the members bathed in sunlight, surrounded by bright summery colors and an assortment of gorgeous looking drinks! This, coupled with the song's bossa-nova sounds make it such a joyful and refreshing experience to watch!

Wishing everyone listening to this song a very happy summer, full of mimosas and pina-coladas :P

• Scandal - A literal masterpiece with one of the best pre-choruses in K-pop! That's how I can describe this song. It has a sort of relaxed but also slightly sultry feel to it and when the pre-chorus hits, it just puts you in a trance! The way it builds and the way it ends is all soo perfect, and I hope people unfamiliar with the song would give it a listen. It's brilliant!
• SOS - A very catchy and vibey B-side. Worth a listen!

​
The group would keep their momentum going (typical TWICE!), and in the very next month would release their 3rd Japanese studio album titled:
Perfect World - Released on July 28^th, 2021

Perfect World	Better	Good at Love
Fanfare	Kura Kura	Four-leaf Clover
In the Summer	Pieces of Love	Thank You, Family
Promise

Charting and Sales
The album debuted at #2 on the Oricon Album Chart and #1 on the Billboard Japan Hot Albums Chart.
Recommendations and Thoughts

• Perfect World - Now this one is a powerful and hard hitting song!! There are no soft portions or slow elements, the song just goes "BAM! Here you go!!" . True to the theme, the members also deliver the performance for this song with an unparalleled level of swagger and attitude! My reaction when I first heard Perfect World is actually perfectly displayed in the MV itself, where people are freaking out and losing their mind, as they watch TWICE performs on a burning stage.
• Thank You, Family & Promise - If you are amongst the small minority of K-pop fans who like soft, vocal-focused songs and ballads, then these are the songs for you. These songs feel very soothing and calming to me, and help me just appreciate the members' beautiful vocals. These songs don't try to incorporate too many elements that compete for your attention, they just keep it nice and simple and help you appreciate what is presented to you.

​
With the schedule for Perfect World wrapped up, it was now time for TWICE to establish themselves as a global powerhouse and solidify their footprint in the west. And how would they go about doing it? Well, the answer to that could be found in a prom invitation titled:
The Feels - released on October 1^st, 2021
Charting and Sales
The Feels would become TWICE's first song to chart on the Billiboard Hot 100, debuting at #83. It would also feature on the UK Singles Chart, peaking at #80, on the Billboard Global 200 at #12, on the Canadian Hot 100 at #56 and on #3 on both the Billboard Japan Hot 100 and Oricon's Combined Singles Chart.
It accumulated 50.9 million global streams and 8,800 global downloads in its very first week. In the United States alone, the song garnered 4.7 million streams, 208,000 radio impressions, and 10,400 digital sales in its first week.
Thoughts
This is a true TWICE song! If I had never listened to it before and someone gave me 4 guesses about the artist, I would guess TWICE all 4 times. This song has every element that had made me fall in love with their music for the first time. It is energetic, upbeat and happy, it's MV is bright and poppy, it has a memorable choreography and it has those very short rap verses that always add a little more fun to the song.
There is nothing more I could say, The Feels is as true to the TWICE theme as one can get and I love TWICE, hence I love this song!
​
The group would then begin preparations of their next release:- for an album which would become one of their most successful, critically acclaimed and widely loved works (and which would start a chain of countless restocking demands from fans :P). I'm of course talking about their 3rd Korean studio album, titled:-
Formula of Love: O+T=＜3 - released on November 12th, 2021

Scientist	Moonlight	Icon
Cruel	Real You	F.I.L.A. (Fall in Love Again)
Last Waltz	Espresso	Rewind
Cactus	Push & Pull (Jihyo, Sana, Dahyun)	Hello (Nayeon, Momo, Chaeyoung)
1, 3, 2 (Jeongyeon, Mina, Tzuyu)	Candy	The Feels

Lyrics contribution: Dahyun - Cruel ; Jihyo - Real You, Cactus; Nayeon - Fall in Love Again
Charting and Sales
FOL was a massive success, garnering a surplus of 700,000 pre-order sales, making it TWICE's highest selling album till then. The album charted at #3 on the Billboard 200, marking a new peak for the group and it also continued its charting for 8 consecutive weeks on the Billboard 200.
It also debuted at #1 on South Korea's Gaon Album Chart, making it Twice's tenth number-one album on the chart. In Japan, it peaked at #17 on Billboard Japan's Hot Albums chart and at #2 on Oricon's Albums Chart. It also peaked at #1 on the Billboard World Album chart and #2 on Billboard Top Album Sales chart.
In Europe, the album appeared on Belgium's Ultratop Flanders and Wallonia 200 Albums, Finland's Top 50 Albums, Lithuania's Top 100 Albums, the Netherlands' Album Top 100, and the UK's Album Downloads Chart.
Recommendations and Thoughts

• Scientist - It's just a very fun and quirky song! I know the community opinion may not be in its favor, but to me, its still very enjoyable!
• Icon - This is their most badass song till date!! The lyrics are unapologetic, hard-hitting and frankly brilliant! This, coupled with the amazing synth music and the insane drop - "I ain't going nowhere, I'm an icon; When all them other nobodies are long gone", makes this song truly iconic!! Mina herself said that the song is about expressing the iconic side of you without hesitation and it honestly can't be described any better. Icon is definitely one of my favorite B-Sides of all time.
• Last Waltz - I don't know what it is about Latin music inspired K-pop songs that make me love them so much, I just know that I do! "Mm-mm-mm-mm (My la-a-ast); Mm-mm-mm-mm (My la-a-ast); Meomchuji malgo just let it flo-o-ow" and the bridge portion after has gripped me since the first time I listened to it, and it will not be going away anytime soon!
• 1, 3, 2 (Jeongyeon, Mina, Tzuyu) - Their three voices mesh together unbelievably well, to create something which I can only describe as art. This song honestly made me realize how parts of a song being distributed between multiple people, rather than being sung by a single person, can help improve the song so much. It probably won't happen, but I'm praying for a JeongMiTzu subunit in the future.
• F.I.L.A. (Fall in Love Again) - A really chill and catchy dance song!

​
It was finally December and time for another year to come to an end. TWICE must have thought that they should wrap the year with a bang, because they went and released a banger!
Doughnut - released on December 15th, 2021

Doughnut	Wonderful Day

Charting and Sales
Doughnut peaked at #3 on the Oricon singles chart and at #6 on the Billboard Japan Hot 100
Recommendations and Thoughts

• Doughnut - This is my favorite Japanese release by TWICE and one of my favorite songs of all time.

1. The song is a soft, city-pop ballad, but is interjected by powerful high notes between verses and in the bridge. This makes it so that your mind is engaged with beautiful vocals throughout the song but as soon as those high notes hit, it pulls your attention instantly and makes you realize what you have been listening to, before transitioning back to the soothing and beautiful tones. This creates a highly unique and amazing listening experience and makes the song so memorable.
2. The MV encapsulates the winter theme perfectly, with the beautiful ice themed set, the snow special effects and with the members looking like angels. When this is coupled with the song itself, it makes you feel like you are watching a fairy tale set in a winter wonderland. It's just perfect!

Awards, Achievements and Recognitions

• TWICE secured 4 music show wins for Alcohol Free and 2 music show wins for Scientist.
• TWICE became the first Korean female act to debut chart an EP in the top 10 of the Billboard 200.
• The Feels became TWICE's first song to chart in the Billboard Hot 100.

Thanks for reading! Please feel free to discuss and share your thoughts on TWICE's 2021, and what music/events you liked most from that time.

First Chapter
Chapter Fifteen
“Thank you, Ms. President, and Mr. Secretary-General. It’s my privilege to come and speak to everyone present during such a momentous time in human history. One which, I hope, will lead to a brighter future for us all…”
US President Correa’s boilerplate beginning flowed out as she scanned the room. Behind her rostrum sat a larger dais tiled with green marble, behind which sat the UN President, Secretary-General, and Under-Secretary-General. Two huge screens flanked the dais, and those screens now showed Correa’s face as she continued.
“…and we are committed to our country’s pledge to finding a peaceful and just way for Coalition technology to be incorporated worldwide, and to not attempt any reverse-engineering of our own. Make no mistake; we do not do this out of any sense of altruism or fairness, as pleasant as that may sound. We will hold this pledge sacred for the simple reason that, if the United States were to attempt such efforts the rest of the world would, without a doubt, find out. That, of course, would lead to a great instability.”
‘Great instability’ was diplomatic-speak for ‘the rest of the world then gangs up on the USA and then everything goes to hell’.
“I know there has already been a great deal of debate in this august hall as to the best way to proceed forward, in a fair and impartial manner. We believe that we have found what one might call a ‘trial run’ which will allow us to work out such matters.”
The general murmuring from the many semi-circular rows of desks in front of her increased.
“To begin with, during the first weeks after first contact we wanted to make sure our guests from the Coalition would not starve to death. Much like humanity’s own ships during the Age of Sail, Coalition exploration vessels store enough provisions for years…but such provisions never last. They have very advanced recycling, but mostly for water and even that is only a stop-gap measure. It is unknown even at this time as to how long it will take to repair the Exultant Finger of Rithro, and we did not want to risk the crew running out of food.
“Therefore, we undertook an emergency effort to have their ship’s medic examine various Earth foods to determine their compatibility with our guests’ varied biochemistries. I am pleased to report that there are quite a few Earth foodstuffs which are indeed compatible, although there are some specific items which act as allergens amongst some of the Coalition species. During these efforts, we did learn a bit about how their alien biochemistries work…information which has been duly published and is now openly available. We also began to get glimpses of something wonderful, and asked the Coalition crew for more details. They supplied us with some general ideas of what their medical technology can accomplish; I must emphasize that we do not possess any knowledge of how they can perform such miracles.”
Now the murmuring got quite a bit higher, but not quite to the point where they’d have to call for order.
“Yes, I use the word ‘miracles’ advisedly. For example, take Captain Sadaf. You have all seen her, and how she moves like a person in the prime of their life. Now. What if I told you that she is a little over four hundred years old?”
The murmuring died down into a shocked silence.
“Her species, the auhn, is no more long-lived than we are…but they are able to regenerate and remove the effects of aging. I hope the esteemed ambassadors can see what I am driving at. I propose that we set up a research institute, international in scope, to be placed at a neutral location which is still to be determined. The purpose of that institute will be to study and adapt Coalition medical technology for use in humans.”
Now the murmuring started again; she hoped they were actually listening instead of hatching side-deals with each other.
“You all have families and friends. I’m sure you have at least one family member, one good friend, who died of some horrible and unnecessary affliction. Think of what this means to the world, to us. It is also an excellent way to determine the inevitable issues and frictions which will arise from such a concerted international effort, and that, in turn, will inform our efforts in mutual reverse-engineering of other Coalition technology.
“I know this is, in many ways, a frightening time. Change can be frightening. But I am convinced that you will all know the right way forward, and that you will all see the need for us to unite in this matter, even if others may not be so clear-cut. I thank you for the opportunity to speak.”
As she stepped away from the rostrum, the UN President cleared his throat.
“We will now begin the debate on Madame President Correa’s proposal. Paper copies, with specifics of the proposal, are now being distributed to you all. We’ll now begin the debate period…yes, the gentleman from Portugal…?”
__________
Correa’s Chief of Staff was a shorter, tubby man with an olive complexion by the name of Pablo Rosas. He and Correa sat in a White House conference room, staring at a big screen which now showed the results of the UN vote. “Well, I suppose that went about as well as we could expect,” said Rosas.
“Yep. I was surprised they even agreed with our asking them to kick in some money.”
Rosas chuckled. “Keep in mind that all of this new medical tech will be available for anyone patent-free. Should be air-tight legally, since nobody here on Earth invented it; we’re merely adapting it. I think that was the sweetener we needed to get it passed.”
The president gave a brief nod, then tapped a few keys on the controls in front of her. The screen now showed a world map. “Now we just have to figure out where to put the damn thing without everyone getting butt-mad about it.”
“Hmm.” Rosas laced his fingers over his substantial gut as he regarded the map. “Someplace not ‘the usual’, then.”
Correa growled in frustration. “I keep thinking Switzerland, but I know there’s gonna be a lot of shit flung about that it’s too European-centric. Taiwan would be great; they’ve got both a good tech base and excellent transport infrastructure.”
“But way too controversial, for obvious reasons,” replied Rosas. “Japan?”
“China will, again, kick up a fuss. Huh. New Zealand?”
“That might work. They tend to be more neutral…but then again some might say they’re in too close with Australia, and that this whole effort is too Western-centric.” His eyes flicked back to north on the map. He was about to move his gaze elsewhere, but then he paused. “What about Iceland?”
“Iceland?” Correa almost scoffed, then looked more thoughtfully at the map. “Okay, they’re a NATO member which is a minus. But they tend to remain mostly neutral, which is a plus. Decent transportation infrastructure…don’t we have a naval air base there?”
“I think so, let me check…” Rosas tapped at his phone. “Hey, Jack? What can you tell me about any US naval air bases in Iceland? Just the highlights.” After a couple of minutes, he responded with a curt, “Okay, that’s enough, thanks.”
He put his phone away. “We kinda-sorta have one, at a place called Keflavik. The base there used to be a lot bigger during the Cold War. Then we shut it down after the Soviets were no longer a going concern. Iceland uses it now, and they allow us to fly submarine-search aircraft out of there, but a few years ago they nixed the DOD’s request to rebuild it into a more permanent base.”
“That does work in their favor. It makes for better optics if they’re known for keeping NATO at arm’s length.”
Rosas sat up. “Think the UN will go for it?”
“We can only try. I’ll have our ambassador in Reykjavik make some discreet inquiries, let’s see if they’d be okay with our proposing them as a candidate.”
The Chief of Staff smiled. “If it goes through, this institute will be pumping well north of a billion dollars per year into their economy. That should make it more than ‘okay’.
__________
Agent Cécile Savoie sat in a secure-location breakroom, silently grumbling as she held an as-yet un-drunk mug of coffee in her hands. As the agent-in-charge of the security detail during the Camp David incident, she’d been put on administrative leave, right alongside every other agent who’d been there. But it wasn’t like she had much down time; the inquiry board into that incident now summoned her damn near every other day for yet another round of tedious questioning.
“Hey,” said Hanson as he strolled in, looking just as sour as she felt.
She looked up in surprise. “Hey yourself. I thought you were assigned to the alien detail.”
“I was,” he said as he seated himself across the circular table from her. “Guess being in Alabama when the shitshow went down wasn’t far enough away to be completely out of suspicion. I just finished running my own gauntlet. But the rumor is, I’m getting it easy compared to everyone who was at Camp David, including the special forces people. Especially you.”
“Yeah, it’s pretty much a colonoscopy every day,” she muttered. “Going over the timeline, where I was at which times, who I had direct line of sight on, who I was in radio contact with.” She finally sipped her coffee.
Hanson’s sour expression deepened. “Do you really think it was one of us?”
She sighed. “It has to be. My gut tells me that there’s more than one mole and I told the inquiry board as much. The fuckers who got in knew too much about our patrol patterns, where everyone was, when they’d have a clear shot at an infil. That means someone with access to our methods and comms, and as to the latter we don’t use CB radios.”
The other agent leaned back. “Fuck. I wish I knew why any of us would do that. We’re supposed to be quiet professionals, not frothing radicals.”
Savoie turned the mug in her hands. “Not to tell tales out of school but, through the whisper network, they’ve been leaning hard on the captured dudes from the attack. Apparently one of their main ‘objections’,” and here she made some one-handed air quotes, “is that they think the whole Breaker thing is a ruse. It’s all smoke and mirrors, so that we’ll beg the Coalition to come and save us. And then…well, it gets vague after that but I guess they claim that at best we’ll get turned into the galactic equivalent of a Native American reservation. Worst case, we all get harvested for our precious bodily fluids.”
Hanson stared at her for a moment in disbelief. “That is, if you will forgive the uncouth term, utterly retarded. For chrissake, the Hubble got some beautiful shots of their ship once they’d spun that shield around to reveal it to us. I mean, I’m no spacecraft expert but even I could tell it had gotten the shit pounded out of it.”
She responded with a shrug. “Hey, Flat Earthers are still a thing.”
“Flat Earthers don’t stage FUCKING mortar attacks in our nation’s capital,” snapped Hanson. Then he subsided and spoke more softly. “Sorry, I shouldn’t be so on edge. This whole thing just pisses me off.”
“Join the club,” said Savoie as she sipped more coffee. “I just don’t get it, though.”
Hanson made a gentle ‘continue’ wave of his hand.
She leaned forward. “Okay. Our comrades in the CIA managed to identify the four who made it into the compound. They were all mercenaries, each with at least ten or fifteen years of experience in kicking ass around some of the worst hot spots in the world. Syria, Burma, bunch of places in Africa. One of ‘em even turned out to be ex-Wagner group.”
“Okay?” It was a leading single-word question, but not an unkind one.
“So why was the rest of the attack made up of nothing but a bunch of goddamn shit-kickers? And that includes the aborted attempt in Decatur. I’ve seen the files of those we rounded up in the Camp David attack. They were all low-life idiots just banging around, maybe they might have once held a gun in their lives. Hell, from what I’ve heard, the shootings that triggered the alarm at Camp David were an accident; those intruders were supposed to sneak around that patrol, not kill them. They all had the same top-of-the-line kit, so we know whoever is behind this has deep pockets. Why not hire an entire bunch of competent people instead of doing it onesy-twoseys?”
“It is a puzzle.” Hanson got up and set a styrofoam cup of water into the nearby microwave. As the cup turned within its electromagnetic prison, he leaned against the nearby counter and pondered her question. “Maybe the team in the woods was intended just as a distraction?”
“That’s what I thought at first, but then I reconsidered. I mean, what if the four who went in failed? You’d still need a proper backup plan. Same thing with the Decatur bunch. By the way, did they ever catch them?”
Hanson let out a dark chuckle. “Decatur PD found a pile of vests and rifles, hastily wiped down. They were able to pull a few partial prints off of ‘em. My guess is they’ve fled to the proverbial four winds, hoping to lay low for the rest of their lives. We’ll nab ‘em eventually.”
The microwave dinged and he retrieved his hot water, then pulled a tea bag out of his jacket pocket as he re-seated himself.
Savoie smiled. “I never figured you for a tea guy.”
He unwrapped the bag and with a bit of ceremony dunked it into his cup. “Well, I used to be a coffee guy, but my gut doesn’t agree with the acidity.”
“We do have tea here, you know.” She pointed to the storage bins behind him.
“Yeah, but it’s cheap-ass stuff. The brand I like is expensive, but worth it…” Hanson’s eyes widened as he trailed off.
She raised an eyebrow. “Hanson? Do you smell burnt toast?”
“They couldn’t afford it,” he said in a near-whisper.
Savoie was about to tell him to stop being overly dramatic, then she realized he might be on to something and that she didn’t dare distract him. “Keep talking.”
He leaned forward, his forearms on the table. “Okay. Imagine you’re a hard-bitten mercenary. You’ve been in the literal shit, in every nasty conflict anyone cares to name. Somehow, someone finds you and comes to you. They say ‘hey, these aliens are bad news, do you want to kill them?’ Even if you, as the hypothetical mercenary, are down with the cause…”
“From what the intruders were yelling, they were,” said Savoie.
“Yeah but even then, our mystery financier is asking you to infil and exfil out of one of the most heavily guarded pieces of real estate on the planet. Oh, and kill a bunch of special-forces-maybe and aliens-definitely in between. What do you do then?”
She replied with a grim smile. “If I’m that mercenary, then I ask for a metric fuck-ton of money. And there were four of them, they would have all done the same. Hell, they must have been doing collective bargaining.”
Hanson dunked his tea bag as he thought it through. “Okay, so our mystery mastermind has a lot of money, but not billions on hand to hire a literal army of hard cases. Huh. So those other dipshits might indeed have been a distraction.”
“Maybe. They must have also spent quite a bit on the mortar attack. That wasn’t made by some hobbyist in their bedroom, they knew what they were doing. Given that nobody saw them set up the launcher or leave, they were more pro.” Savoie hoped that the FBI’s efforts to track the various mortar components turned up something soon. Thus far, those efforts were bogged down; as it turned out, quite a few companies had ordered the identified components, and tracking the subsequent second-hand purchases was time-consuming.
“And those mortar-making pros would be more expensive.” Hanson sipped a bit of tea. “Did they ever get anything off of the launcher itself?”
“Sadly, no. Turns out the whole damned thing was homemade, constructed out of tubing and other off-the-shelf components. It was also wiped down thoroughly, no prints. Like I said, pros.”
“But limited in resources,” said Hanson. “Which explains one of the things that’s bugged me. Namely, that our OPFOR didn’t use some proper artillery. If they have a couple of moles in the Secret Service, then it should be easy to recruit and pay some military dudes to slip ‘em some gear and alter the logs. They could stow a howitzer inside a semi-tractor-trailer. You could park that thing anywhere up to 25 miles away. Use a single 155mm Excalibur GPS-guided munition, boom. That would have pretty much obliterated the stage and everyone on it. Then you just re-stow the howitzer and toodle off all innocent-like, right when everyone is freaking the hell out.”
“So they couldn’t afford that type of arty strike,” she said. “Or they simply didn’t have the contacts to pull that off. Hmm. I wonder if our moles are getting paid at all?”
Hanson resumed his thousand-yard stare. “The mortar attack must have been planned first. The other two attacks feel much more like rush jobs.”
“Eh? Oh, I get it. Sadaf’s speech was known well in advance. It was going to be one of her first big public appearances since the initial presidential speech. They were broadcasting it online to the world. Having her get turned into chunky red salsa, in real time, would be one helluva statement. So that’s what they focused on.” She drank a bit more coffee, and now it was time for her eyes to widen. “Our mole or moles didn’t arrive at Camp David until after Sadaf’s speech was announced.”
“That…oh, yeah, that makes sense. Originally the mortar attack is the OPFORs’ only focus, but yet somehow they’ve suborned one or two Secret Service agents and they have ‘em in their back pocket. Then one, or better yet both, of the moles gets assigned to the Camp David detail, and they realize that now that they have a golden opportunity to get at the other aliens as well. So they go off and hire four pros for the actual attack inside, plus a bunch of chucklefucks to act as a distraction, because that’s all they can afford since the four pros are asking for some serious money.”
Savoie leaned forward. “When did Chao and Grakosh leave Camp David?”
“It was, ah, three? No, four days after we got everyone settled, both the aliens and the special forces types.”
“Okay, so then the OPFOR gets word, courtesy of our moles, that one of the aliens is now heading to Alabama. But now they’re stretched so thin that they can’t afford anything other than to hire another bunch of dipshits to make a run at them and hope for the best.”
“And then the second bunch lets the FNG drive.”
They both laughed, but that humor settled down as they both thought through the chain of inference.
“It is pretty thin,” said Savoie at last. “There’s a lot of assumptions in there.”
“Yeah. But I do like the idea of our moles getting assigned at the last minute.”
She rubbed her forehead. “We had a bunch of new people come in when they decided to stow the Rithro crew there. Seven, no eight in all.”
“It’s a place to start,” said Hanson. He finished his tea. “C’mon, let’s see if we can get a meeting with the inquiry board.”
__________
A little while later and not very far away, three people sat in a well-lit but otherwise deadly dull room. At least the chairs were somewhat comfortable. Matt and Martinez sat at two chairs against one wall, while across from them McCoy sat sprawled sideways on another with a foul look on her face. She glowered at the far beige-painted wall. “This completely sucks. Why can’t we have our phones? I could at least play some mahjong.”
“This is a secure location, Corporal,” replied Matt. “Ixnay on the onephays.”
Martinez’s leg jittered. “How long are we gonna sit here? They said they’d call us in, like, an hour ago!”
“Dunno, it’s some kind of last-minute interview thing,” replied Matt with Zen-like calm.
The corporal looked over at Matt. “I don’t get you, man.”
Matt grinned. “Nobody gets me. I’m like the wind, baby!”
“That’s not…I mean, I watched you open up a dude like he was a bag of fuckin’ Doritos using nothing but a fuckin’ knife. Now you’re being all Caine from ‘Kung Fu’.”
“It’s good to know that the classics are still appreciated,” said Matt.
Martinez pointed at him. “If you start calling me ‘Grasshopper’ I will shoot you.”
McCoy turned her glare to the ceiling. “Maybe it’s a psychological test. They want to see if we crack under pressure and start yakking secrets.”
“I mean, I’m sure they’re recording us right now,” replied Matt. “But it’s merely as a precaution. I am also five-nines certain that none of us are suspects. We weren’t integrated into the compound’s overall security, and thus it would be unlikely that we could have let our four attackers in.”
“Not to mention, we were the ones to kill ‘em,” added Martinez. “Well, except for the one that Takh took care of.”
“Yep. This is…I won’t call it a formality, but the board just wants to know where you were and what you saw. Walk them through your personal timelines, understand? Tell them only what you know. If you don’t know something, then say so.”
McCoy turned herself around so that she now sprawled the other way. “This whole bullshit just bugs me. Takh and the others are off with a bunch of strangers and I…I mean, we aren't there to help protect them.”
Matt and Martinez shared a meaningful glance. “From what I heard, Takh is quite capable of taking care of himself,” said the latter with a grin. “You told me he pitched that one dude across the room like he was throwing a softball.”
For once, the petite corporal looked a bit flustered. “Yeah, but, I mean, what if some other potential bad guy gets the drop on him with a gun? I don’t like not being there. I just wanna know that he’s okay. I should be there, just to make sure.”
The smaller man snapped his fingers in the face of the taller, who sighed and took out his wallet. With great ceremony, Matt pulled out a five-dollar bill and placed it upon the now-upraised palm of Martinez.
“Told ya,” said Martinez with a grin.
She sat up and glared at them both. “That doesn’t mean anything! Takh is a good guy!”
“Nobody said he wasn’t,” replied Matt as he stowed his wallet. “He is indeed a good guy.”
“Yeah, seriously, we’re glad you two hooked up,” added Martinez. “Takh’s solid. Hell, I’d let him date my sister.”
“I. Am. Not. Hooked Up. With ANYONE.” McCoy now looked furious enough to chew nails.
Martinez stroked his chin. “Kissing might be a problem, though.”
Matt performed a similar chin-stroking action. “Hmm, indeed, Corporal, I do believe it might be a serious issue. One has all of those mandibles to contend with.” He hooked his fingers next to his mouth in an approximation of an udhyr’s face. “Still, I think that, with enough will and effort, one could figure it out. Like the man said, life finds a way.”
“But how much tongue is he packing?” posed Martinez. “You know what the man also says. Big dude, big tongue. Could make things more interesting, all around.”
The woman did not look amused. “Martinez, Toke? You are now both officially gigantic flatulating assholes.”
“C’mon, McCoy!” protested Martinez. “Think of it this way. A few years from now, let’s say we filthy humans are now part of the Coalition and I’m at some meet ‘n greet, and I just so happen to spy me an oh-so-very-fiiine udhyr mamacita from across the room. Now, I wanna do my bit for my species and approach her, and get some good old inter-species cultural interaction going on. But there’s all sorts of questions. How do I compliment her without insulting her culture? How am I supposed to get in good with her? How do the mechanics work? How do the various bits line up? We need details! You’re at the tip of the spear, we all need good intel!”
McCoy slumped back into her seat. “Over seven hundred billion Dimmadollars of defense spending, and yet somehow I wind up stuck in a room with you two fuckos…oh, by the way, Toke,” she added, pointing a finger at Matt, “why the hell can you and Sarge never go back to Okinawa?”
“Nice distraction, McCoy,” said Martinez. “My guess is some sort of wet-work shit.”
Matt just smiled. “Oh for fuck’s sake, I don’t kill everyone I meet. I was a Second LT at the time, managed to somehow leapfrog my way into officer ranks all the way from enlisted. Anyways, the Okinawa affair was merely a case of, well, one particular case of rye whiskey. The good sergeant…was he a sergeant then? Oh yeah, we had done some other stuff I can’t tell you about in someplace I can’t tell you where, and we were celebrating Shaw getting his third stripe. We’d got ahold of the previously-mentioned case of whiskey and then we began toasting to each other’s good health. We did a lot of toasting. Quite a lot of toasting. As you can imagine, the toasting went on and on until we, um, well we did some unwise things. It started out with us sparring-for-fun with each other in public and escalated from there. No locals were harmed, and nothing we did was hella illegal, or I would’ve never made Captain. Buuut the local government would definitely throw a shitfit if me or, God forbid, both of us set foot back on the island.” He chuckled. “Hell, the Okinawan customs people probably still have both of our pictures taped up inside their booths with a big old sign saying ‘DO NOT ADMIT THIS PERSON, YOU FOOL’ written above them.”
“What did you do?” asked Martinez. His eyes were big and soulful, like a kid asking for yet one more story before bedtime.
Matt shrugged. “I mean, I don’t remember much for obvious reasons. I’m almost sure we didn’t piss on any monuments, that would have definitely been cause for a serious demotion. We did do a number on some shrubbery, that I do remember. We decided it needed to be trimmed back, and so we did so. Using our bare hands. Seemed like a good idea at the time.”
A fearsome light came into McCoy’s eyes. “Martinez, do you know what this means?”
He looked at her all uncertain. “Um, Toke and Sarge have cast-iron livers?”
“No, you fool. Blackmail material.”
Matt pointed back at her. “Hey, now, I told you that in confidence. Besides, Shaw has a lot more to contend with right now.”
The reminder of the sergeant’s current crippled state brought the elevated atmosphere of the room back down. McCoy nodded as her smile faded. “Right. Hey, did you see the Prez’s speech at the UN?”
“Yep,” said Matt. “From what I’ve read, the political wrangling after it seems pretty tame compared to the usual.”
Martinez snorted. “No shit. Did either of you see the laundry list of shit that we might be able to do? Anti-aging, limb regrowth, cancer treatments which work well and which don’t half-kill the patient…hell, maybe even Alzheimer’s could be in our rear-view mirror. The grand high muckity-mucks are falling all over themselves to get that out into the world, for themselves if nobody else.”
“You’re way too cynical, Martinez,” said Matt.
“Oh fuck off. What if…okay, I know this sounds like a cheesy sci-fi concept, but what if they hoard all of the good shit for themselves and we peons get just the crumbs?”
Matt lapsed back into his meditative demeanor. “In that case, my dear corporal, you or I or McCoy or someone like us will show those hypothetical elites that, while they are indeed long-lived, they are not in fact immortal.”
The trio fell into silence for a few minutes. Then Martinez leaned over towards Matt. “Ah, a little birdie told me you were involved in questioning the prisoners we nabbed at Camp David.”
“I merely facilitated certain conversations,” replied Matt.
Martinez sighed. “What the fuck does that mean?”
“Ask me no questions and I will tell you no lies…Corporal.”
McCoy let out a growl. “Well, I heard these terrorist assholes are saying that the Breakers aren’t real, that it’s all fake videos from the Coalition.”
“Just to play devil’s advocate,” said Matt, “our AI image and video generation is already getting to the point where, soon, we puny humans could manufacture such evidence.”
“What?” Martinez looked as if he was about to launch himself at Matt.
Matt held up a calming hand. “I’m not saying it is fake. The Hubble pics are damned convincing.”
Martinez hiked up one foot to place it on his seat, then rested his chin on his knee. “Fuck. I guess it didn’t convince everyone.” He mused for a few moments. “Wait. What if we made it even more convincing?”
“How?” asked Matt.
“We send some humans up to the Rithro. Two or three at least. The boats can still make it up to the ship, right?”
For once Matt looked uncertain. “I think so? Dunno how many times they can come and go without recharging, we’ll have to ask ‘em.”
“Right, so we set up an even better publicity stunt than the Hubble pics. Choose a few people, from all over the world. We have ‘em travel up to the Rithro, take pics and video up close showing the damage. Even take ‘em inside the ship and get a full tour, maybe…if the crew is okay with that, of course.”
“Huh.” Matt sat back and pondered the idea. “That’s a really good idea, Martinez. I guess you aren’t as dumb as you look.”
The corporal responded with a slight smile at the verbal jab. “We’d need to choose the right people, though.”
“They’d have to be trustworthy…or at least someone that the entire world will consider trustworthy,” said Matt.
“Well known,” added McCoy. She no longer looked vengeful. “With recognizable faces and voices, and then they can go on all the talk shows after and say that, yes indeed, I got a tour of the ship and it is indeed quite banged up.”
Martinez stared at the far wall. “Some kind of celebrity? Heh. You think Tom Cruise would be up for it?”
Matt laughed. “That beautiful maniac? Hell, he’d insist on shooting an entire movie up there, with at least one action scene where he’s hanging off of the outside of the ship.”
They all smiled at the resulting mental image.
“Chao could work,” said McCoy into the silence. “She’s kind of a celebrity now. After all, she was the first human to come into contact with aliens, eh?” She gave Matt a big and very un-subtle wink.
To skirt the rather…unconventional methods used to achieve a positive First Contact, Matt’s role had been very much demoted in the official story. Now every recounting of the tale included a bit of ‘…oh, and there was also another person who stumbled across our brave woman in the midst of her attempts at informational exchange with the aliens…” His exact identity was also not published, under the screen of ‘he wishes to remain anonymous’.
“Oh bite me, McCoy, it’s fun,” replied Matt. He waggled his eyebrows. “Besides, I work better in the shadows!” He threw his forearm across his face like a half-assed Count Dracula trying to hide behind his cape.
Then he dropped his arm. “Yeah, Chao would be good as a current social-media darling. Of course, she might not want that. She strikes me as more of the wallflower type, for the most part.”
“We need more people,” said Martinez, as he stared at the floor. “Chao might be good on her own, but she’s got that motor-mouth talking thing when you get her going. It’s one or the other. Either she’s trying to shrink into a corner and take up as little space as possible, or suddenly you’re getting pulled into another corner for a doctoral dissertation on how minimal-energy transfer-orbits work.”
Matt pondered for a moment. “Wait, when did she do that? I never sat through one of those lectures.”
Martinez looked away and…well, Matt hoped that their supposed overlords were indeed recording this particular moment in time because the hard-bitten Hispanic special-forces corporal actually blushed.
McCoy, of course, realized a golden opportunity for payback and immediately pounced. “Why, Corporal Martinez,” she purred. “Doooo tell us. When did Chao Me Chu, heh, pull you into a corner? Hmmm?”
“She’s…she’s just real nice, that’s all,” replied Martinez. “I asked her a couple of questions, and she answered them. That’s all. We both love classic sci-fi, like Asimov and shit. I guess we bonded over that.”
Matt cleared his throat. “Aaaaand may I remind you two and everyone listening in that we have all been cooped up nuts-to-butts for awhile? Don’t mistake familiarity for romantic bullshit.” He pointed over at Martinez. “But you. If you can follow at least half of what she talks about, then you are absolutely without-a-single-fucking-doubt wasted as a corporal, even if you’re in a low-drag high-speed outfit like this. You hear me?”
“Um, yes sir.” It was the first time in McCoy’s memory that anyone had addressed Matt as befitting his perhaps-former rank.
“Good. You get your ass into college, somehow. You’re a smart guy, you’ll figure all that shit out. And as for Chao? Just give it room to breathe. Let her know you’re interested, but don’t press the matter.”
“Let her know?” For once Martinez looked completely lost. “How do I…” he trailed off. “I mean, I like her…and yeah, I mean I like her in that way, but she’s so damn smart and pretty and I’m just some dipshit meathead.”
“Hey, don’t sell yourself short,” said Matt. “You’re our dipshit meathead.”
McCoy’s vengeful smile faded. “Martinez…no, Luca.”
Martinez looked up in surprise at her use of his first name.
She continued. “Just talk to her. Neither of you have any clue as to what ‘normal’ social interactions look like. In your case, it’s because you’ve been a soldier for all of your adult life. In her case, it’s because she’s, well, because she’s Chao. So just walk up to her and be straightforward. Trust me, it’ll be like a breath of fresh air for her to not have to navigate social cues. Just say something like ‘Hey, I really like you, do you like me and do you want to go get a coffee sometime’? Start with that. Chao’s good people, the worst thing she’ll do is say no. She won’t yell at you or talk shit about you online. Buuuut, some sixth sense is telling me she won’t say no to getting some coffee with ya.”
Matt smiled. “McCoy, I think you might have a calling after you leave the military.”
She snorted. “Oh yeah, I’ll hang up my match-making shingle on the internet and start raking in the big bucks. Martinez is right, though. If we try to do a publicity stunt up at the Rithro, then we’ll need somebody alongside Chao to win the world over. Somebody well-known, but preferably someone not in the traditional Western pop-culture sphere. That’ll make it more palatable…”
Her voice trailed off and she stared into space. The two men now looked at each other in genuine concern until she spoke again a few moments later.
“Guys? I think I just had the best idea ever.”

It gets worse

Temu isn’t unique in all the info it wants to capture from your phone. Most apps out there want as much as you’ll give up. But considering its ties to Communist China, the permissions seem even more frightening to me.
Temu collects, among other things:

• The info you provide, like your name, address, and phone number.
• Details you enter, like your birthday, photo, and social media profiles.
• Your phone or computer’s operating system and version, IP address, GPS location (if you allowed it), and browsing data.

They also gather more about you from third party sources, including Temu sellers, public records, social media, data brokers, credit bureaus, and marketing partners.
Americans using Temu are selling the country out for bargains that really aren’t worth it. I say you delete it. Here’s how:
On iPhone, long-press an app, then tap Remove App > Delete App. Tap Delete to confirm.
On Android, touch and hold an app, then tap Remove App > Delete App > Delete.

In bad company

While Temu collects a lot, it’s nothing compared to Pinduoduo. Remember, they are owned by the same company.
Cybersecurity researchers found it wasn’t just tracking device info and activity — malicious code allowed it to bypass cellphone security settings to spy on other apps, read notifications and messages, and even change settings.
Temu gains full access to all your contacts, calendars, and photo albums, plus all your social media accounts, chats, and texts. In other words, literally everything on your phone.
No shopping app needs this much control, especially one tied to Communist China. If you’re using Pinduoduo, delete the app from your phone ASAP. It’s also reportedly hard to remove everything, even after you delete it.
Pro tip: If you downloaded Pinduoduo, you really need to do a full factory reset on your smartphone to wipe out any remaining code or tracking. - Source

Hey everyone! Posting this WAMC from a throwaway just because it has more personal details. I had done a WAMC on SDN and here before, but the school list seemed really top heavy, and also there are apparently people out there with 10-30 publications 💀. Hoping to just get some final feedback before I submit.
GPA: cGPA: 3.82 and sGPA: 3.74, B.S. in Biochemistry, minor in chemistry
MCAT: 521
Demographics: URM white hispanic (so marking white and mexican), bisexual.
Illinois residency, ties to Ohio and Michigan
School type: T40 private, primarily paid for with merit scholarships, grants, and work during school
Clinical (all volunteer): 200 hrs EMT emergency response (over 2 years), 700 hrs with a free clinic working primarily with AA and hispanic populations (over 2 years), doing patient assessments and vitals
Research: Roughly 1,000 hrs at 2 labs (400 hrs at first, 600 at second) with 2 first-author presentations at local school conferences from the 2nd lab
Shadowing: 32 hrs shadowing an anesthesiologist, 32 hrs primary care physician
Non-clinical volunteering (most impactful):
I have to double check because it's my part-time gap year work, but it's probably over 2,000 hours at this point over 3 years and my gap year. All my hours have been as a volunteer and now as a director for a 100-person social justice and government policy non-profit. As a volunteer, I largely worked with hispanic and AA students by going into local schools and helping host sessions to discuss issues affecting local students and their communities (food deserts, lack of internet access, LGBTQ issues, etc), as well as leading laptop and internet hotspot distribution programs that gave students hundreds of devices.
As I worked up in leadership, I got more involved in the policy side of things. I've been the director of our national townhall series, which are events hosted with national political leaders. I coordinated and ran the events for townhalls with all the candidates for Cleveland's mayoral election (including incumbent mayor), the candidates for Congresswoman for our national congressional district, and our state's Secretary of State. All these events primarily focused on lack of internet access in our city and have had around 5,000 attendees in total. I also later helped to manage the school program mentioned in the first paragraph, which has worked with over 6,000 students across 40 different schools in the area.
Finally, I helped get legislation passed at the state level, entailing over $200 million in internet broadband funding from the Federal Government for our state. This entailed writing up a policy white paper, going to the state capital to talk to the State congress, discussing the issues and details with the bill's sponsor, and working with another policy research non-profit. This ultimately created the BroadbandOhio program, which I've been working with for the last year on additional legislation for Ohio. I've also been involved with our grant process and have applied for and managed about $200,000 in grant funding.
Other extracurricular activities (including athletics, military service, gap year activities, leadership, teaching, etc):
Biology TA for 2 years, resident assistant and senior resident assistant for 3 years, emergency dispatcher for one year, and led a large campus board for 3 years.
This board involved me leading and overseeing about 13 student organizations and 1,000 students, working directly with administration on student issues related to media. I also wrote up a report and created a new student center through the conversion of an old building; got about $300,000 in funding from administration for it and the board itself had about $500,000 in annual budget that I managed directly. Board was advised by an associate dean that I'm close with. I also have some minor leadership in comparison to the campus board and non-profit work.
Relevant honors or awards:
Won two national awards, about $15,000 in scholarships, several campus awards, and featured on the news for the non-profit; won a campus award and a $1,000 prize for leading the student center project. Some other minor stuff like Dean's list and around $10,000 for research funding over 2 summers from 2 separate grants.
Anything else not listed you think might be important:
Letter writers will be the biology professor I took a class with and later TA'd for; nutrition professor I took several classes and a graduate research seminar with; physics professor I had for a small class and who liked my non-profit work; founder and former CEO of the non-profit I'm on the board for; and dean for the student board.
Issues:
Got 2 Cs in Calc 2 and Ochem 1 freshman year and a withdrawal from an economics class during sophomore year (got a concussion and just general difficulties with adapting to college). However, I've had a near 4.0 since then, with As in Ochem 2, 4 physics courses, and 2 upper division calculus courses. Finally, my school offers a committee letter but, because of a change I had to make in my application, it'll be delayed until SeptembeOctober because my school normally submits them in August. Because of that, I've decided to go with individual letters, which I know is a negative and a knock against me, but I'd rather have the guarantee of submitting early with my own letters. I also will not have a PI letter of recommendation and research will not be one of my MMEs (the student board, non-profit, and free clinic will be)
I primarily want to target T20 ish schools (maybe want to do a competitive specialty) in the Midwest/Northeast in urban areas (I do bike and transportation advocacy as a hobby, so they're very important to me) and apply to around 20-30 schools, hopefully with merit money.
Preliminary list:
Northwestern
UChicago
Rush
UIC
Loyola
Washington University in St. Louis
University of Iowa
University of Michigan
Ohio State
University of Cincinnati
Mayo (MN)
Vanderbilt
Duke
Emory
University of Pittsburgh
University of Rochester
Albert Einstein
Columbia
Mt. Sinai
Cornell
Georgetown
Yale
Harvard
UCLA
UCSF
Case Western
Maybe: NYU, Stanford, Penn, JHU, Jefferson, Boston, George Washington, Brown

It hurts to see that you moved on so immediately, one month was all it took after two years and an apartment together. And it could’ve been with anybody in the world, but it had to be with my best friend. You both broke my heart, but you broke it twice by betraying me like that.
It hurts to see you from a distance. A part of me will always love you. You were my first love, my first roommate, my first kiss. You were the person who made me realise that I can be loved and I’m deserving of not only that, but respect, trust, reassurance, affirmation and communication.
I miss falling asleep next to you and waking up to hug and kiss you before rushing off to work. I miss existing with you. I miss your letters. I miss when you would introduce me to your friends as your partner. I miss your aftershave and the cologne you grew to love because I bought it for you for our first Christmas together.
I miss your smile, even though you didn’t like to because you didn’t like your teeth, but that grin had my whole heart, in all of its beautiful crookedness and gaps. I miss you holding my hand and knowing when to squeeze it because you could tell I was anxious. I miss you letting me cry, even if we were in public, and you would comfort me. I miss the flowers you would buy me just because. I miss going to church with you and hugging you during the sign of peace.
I miss going out with our friends and having you kiss my forehead before you went to the bar to grab us both a drink. I miss you dancing like an absolute dad to your favourite songs. I miss your country music playlist even when I pretended to hate it. I miss your fiery ginger hair even though you didn’t always love it, but it was my favourite. I miss your hugs because you were the first guy who made me short and the fact that your hand enveloped mine so dearly.
I miss when you drumming along to every song we listen to, even when we’re in the car and you’d still hold my hand while doing it. I miss your long goodbyes when we couldn’t see each other during the week and the fact that you got emotional as I did. I miss the fact that you weren’t embarrassed to be seen with me, you were even proud to have me as your partner.
I miss you calling me beautiful, sweetheart, frizzles, your gorgeous girl, darling, love, your soulmate. But I’m not those things to you anymore. She is and that’s what hurts the most. You gave up on me for the girl who set us up, our number one supporter, the one who I thought would be my maid of honour at our wedding. You chose my best friend over me when you knew it was my worry at the start of our relationship, but you reassured me that she was your ‘sister’ and there was ‘nothing there’.
But now I know you’re moving states for her when you wouldn’t for me. You hold her hand in public the way you used to hold mine. You’ve made her a playlist and deleted ours. You lost your virginity to her after we vowed to wait until marriage for each other. Your mum loves her even more than me, even though she called me her future daughter in law the first time she met me. I lost the two of you both in the same month, my family. And even though I’m not in love with you anymore, it still breaks my heart every single time I hear a song play that we shared through Spotify or seeing you on other people’s socials.
You both broke me and I will never be able to fill the emptiness you left behind, but I’m not just your partner anymore, I am my own person and people love me for me, not just because of you. I think you would be proud of me if you still cared.
I got more tattoos, I’ve started taking photos at the events we used to attend together but you refuse to go to now, I’ve found a new, more loving and faithful family, I’ve started my dream degree. I survived the attempt I made on my own life after you abandoned in the middle of the night and never saw me again. I made it out of the hospital that your heartbreak put me in and I moved hundreds of kilometres to a new city and created a new life for myself.
So even though you refuse to acknowledge my presence when I’m with our mutual friends, I hope somewhere inside of you, you still care and that you’re proud, because I know the boy I fell in love with at 17 would be cheering for me regardless of what‘s happened to us. Tell your kids about me someday and I’ll be telling mine about our adventures, and when my kids come crying to me about their first heartbreak, I’ll be grateful you taught me how to survive the unthinkable.
In some odd and astounding way, I forgive you T, but I will not forget

Blinken Dismisses Calls for a Ceasefire, Says US Must Build Up Ukraine’s Military
The Secretary of State called for Washington to continue to put militarism before diplomacy
by Kyle Anzalone - Posted onJune 2, 2023
The US will focus its efforts on arming Ukraine and not attempting to bring the war to a negotiated settlement, America’s top diplomat said. Secretary of State Antony Blinken laid out a plan to massively expand Kiev’s military before talks begin.
In a speech delivered in Finland on Friday, Blinken stated, "The United States – together with our allies and partners – is firmly committed to supporting Ukraine’s defense today, tomorrow, for as long as it takes." He continued, "We believe the prerequisite for meaningful diplomacy and real peace is a stronger Ukraine, capable of deterring and defending against any future aggression."
Blinken dismissed the idea of even a temporary pause in the fighting. "Some countries will call for a ceasefire. And on the surface, that sounds sensible – attractive, even. After all, who doesn’t want warring parties to lay down their arms? Who doesn’t want the killing to stop?" He said. "But a ceasefire that simply freezes current lines in place and enables Putin to consolidate control over the territory he’s seized…It would legitimize Russia’s land grab. It would reward the aggressor and punish the victim."
The Secretary of State offered an ambitious vision of Kiev’s future military capabilities. "America and our allies are helping meet Ukraine’s needs on the current battlefield while developing a force that can deter and defend against aggression for years to come." He added, "That means helping build a Ukrainian military of the future, with long-term funding, a strong air force centered on modern combat aircraft, an integrated air and missile defense network, advanced tanks and armored vehicles, national capacity to produce ammunition, and the training and support to keep forces and equipment combat-ready."
It is unclear how long it would take to build the deterrence force envisioned by Blinken. American arms stockpiles are dwindling as Washington attempts to transfer Kiev enough military equipment to keep its army fighting. The US additionally has plans to significantly increase arms transfers to Taiwan.
Blinken claimed, "Our support for Ukraine hasn’t weakened our capabilities to meet potential threats from China or anywhere else – it’s strengthened them." In November, the Wall Street Journal reported, "US government and congressional officials fear the conflict in Ukraine is exacerbating a nearly $19 billion backlog of weapons bound for Taiwan, further delaying efforts to arm the island."
Additionally, the White House may not have the support it needs in the Capitol for such a massive military buildup in Ukraine. Blinken asserted that "in America, this support is bipartisan." However, at the beginning of May, Rep. Michael McCaul (R-TX), chairman of the House Foreign Affairs Committee, said future support for Ukraine would be contingent on success in Kiev’s long-planned counteroffensive.
Since McCaul’s statement, Ukraine has slowly lost more territory to Russian forces, including Bakhmut. Zelensky committed endless resources to the city in a months-long battle despite the advice from his Western backers. The White House is now preparing for the counteroffensive to fail.
Washington’s strategy, as laid out by Blinken, calls for arming Ukraine and weakening Russia. "Russia is significantly worse off today than it was before its full-scale invasion of Ukraine – militarily, economically, geopolitically," he stated, adding, "President Putin has diminished Russian influence on every continent."
However, Gen. Christopher Cavoli, the commander of US European Command, told Congress in April that Moscow’s ground forces are "bigger today" than before Moscow launched its invasion of Ukraine last year.
While the White House has attempted to isolate the Kremlin, Moscow has weathered Western sanctions by developing relationships in the global south. On Friday, Russian officials met with prospective members of the BRICS coalition, including Saudi Arabia, Iran and the UAE. In September, Iran’s President Ebrahim Raisi said in a meeting with Putin, "The relationship between countries that are sanctioned by the US, such as Iran, Russia or other countries, can overcome many problems and issues and make them stronger."
Blinken justified the Biden administration’s commitment to a militaristic approach by claiming the White House attempted to engage the Kremlin in meaningful diplomacy before the invasion of Ukraine. "President Biden told President Putin that we were prepared to discuss our mutual security concerns – a message that I reaffirmed repeatedly – including in person, with Foreign Minister Lavrov." The Secretary of State continued, "We offered written proposals to reduce tensions. Together with our allies and partners, we used every forum to try to prevent war, from the NATO-Russia Council to the OSCE, from the UN to our direct channels."
In April 2022, Biden administration official Derek Chollet admitted that the White House refused to negotiate with the Krem[l]in on Putin’s core concern, Ukraine becoming a member of NATO. "We made clear to the Russians that we were willing to talk to them on issues that we thought were genuine concerns," Chollet said, adding that the administration didn’t think that "the future of Ukraine" was one of those issues and that its potential NATO membership was a "non-issue."

https://news.antiwar.com/2023/06/02/blinken-dismisses-calls-for-a-ceasefire-says-us-must-build-up-ukraines-military/

"Think of this as a chance at revenge," Sweeney said.
​
Revenge.
​
What a moronically quaint idea.
​
This jumped up little shit had come into my home, interrupted my retirement and here he was talking to me about revenge, as if he knew the first thing about what I’d seen, what I’d been through, why I’d quit.
​
Looking into his eyes, I knew he didn’t understand. I knew he couldn’t.
​
I've been hunting vampires for most of my life. I've killed more of them than I can count. But Clementine Di Cesare was no ordinary vampire. Hell, none of the Di Cesares were ordinary vampires, but even among them Clementine was… unique. She was the one all the others quietly feared. The one who was even spoken of with reverence by the Di Cesares masters, those twin Immortals who could not be killed by any weapon of this world. Seeking revenge against her was like seeking revenge against death itself.
​
“Revenge?” I repeated, with a dismissive scoff.
“You’re really going to tell me that after what she put you through, you don’t want revenge?” Sweeney asked.
“If you knew what she did to me, you’d know why I don’t want revenge,” I replied.
“Really? Sorry Franklin, but I don’t buy that. Look, I get it if you’re reluctant to jump back into the fight. I do. You of all people know just how dangerous the Di Cesare’s are. Especially ‘La Morte’.”
​
I looked over at him as he said that name. It rolled off his tongue so irreverently. To him, it was just a name. An alias assigned to some vampire he’s only heard of stories. He didn’t utter it with the respect it deserved, and I almost couldn’t be bothered to correct him. Any words spent on this small minded glory hound were probably wasted.
​
“Yes, I do know.”
“Which is why I need you,” Sweeney said. He almost sounded as if he were pleading with me. “Think of this as an opportunity to set things right… to put that vampire bitch in the ground where she belongs, and save God only knows how many lives in the process!”
I sighed.
He just didn’t get it.
​
“Mark my words, Mr. Sweeney, if you chase after Clementine Di Cesare, you’ll end far more lives than you save. She didn’t get a name like ‘La Morte’ for nothing. She earned it. Purchased it with the blood of the tens of thousands she’s sent screaming into the maw of Hell. She is not something you chase, Sweeney.”
“She’s a vampire,” Sweeney said dismissively. “She’s another enemy to destroy.”
“That’s what George Bundy said,” I replied. “Then not too long after, he died.”
“I’m not George Bundy,” Sweeney said.
“No. You sure as hell ain’t,” I agreed, before looking the kid in the eye.
​
He thought he was an up and comer, climbing the ranks of the Brethren. He probably thought of himself as some sort of badass vampire hunter too, when in reality he could never have so much as dreamed of holding a candle to the likes of Bundy… or hell, any of the men who’d died in Brazil.
“You should watch your tone with me,” Sweeney warned.
“Or you’ll do what?” I asked, “You ain’t going to frighten me with vague threats, boy. I’ve walked through Hell, trying to kill the Devil. What have you done?”
​
Sweeney bit his lip but didn’t respond.
“There’s nothing you can say or do that will intimidate me,” I said, before lighting myself a cigarette. I stared at the road outside of my porch, old memories flooding back to me before looking over at Sweeney again. He sat in his chair beside me like a sulky child. This was the man who wanted to destroy the Di Cesare family? Pathetic.
​
“Exactly how much do you know about the Brazil Job?” I asked.
“I know it was a failure. Clementine Di Cesare killed most of the men the Brethren sent out… all except for you. You were the only one good enough to beat her.”
“Good enough…” I repeated with a huff, “Hardly… whatever picture you’ve got in your head of some glorified battle, throw it away. Trust me, the Brazil Job was anything but glorious. It was a two hour long trek through Hell. And I didn’t beat Di Cesare at the end of it. I survived her. They’re two different things entirely.”
“I’m not sure I understand,” Sweeney said.
“You wouldn’t, would you?” I sighed and took another drag on my cigarette.
​
This kid wasn’t going to leave until I made him understand… so I told him my story. I told him everything even though I knew he’d learn nothing from it.
​
***
​
I’d joined up with the Brethren Knights of St. Fontaine back in the 1980s to hunt monsters. Back then, it seemed like the best use of my skills. I’d done my tours with the army, but even after I got out, I was still looking for an enemy to fight. So naturally, once I found out that vampires were real, I set my sights on them. It seemed like the most sensible thing to do at the time.
​
The Brethren Knights fancied themselves the descendants of the Knights Templar, and they insisted that their God given mission was to protect mankind from the things that lurked in the shadows. I didn’t really have much love for God at the time, but if the Bretheren were the ones fighting the monsters, then I was happy to tolerate the Jesus freaks in their ranks.
​
It was 1988 when we first heard whispers of the Imperium. A supposed cabal of vampires, trying to get them organized. At the time, it’d seemed too crazy to be true. Vampires generally went their own way, in my experience. At most, they might have a partner but other than they they didn’t really socialize with their own kind. But supposedly someone out there had the big fucking balls to keep them in line, and whoever they were, they scared the shit out of the Brethren.
​
They’d started targeting high profile vampires, trying to find someone who was involved in this ‘Imperium’, hoping that maybe they might get someone to talk. And it wasn’t long until they found someone who did.
​
From my understanding, the vampire they captured didn’t seem to know much about who was actually running the show. But they knew who their second in command was… and that was when I first head about the Di Cesare family.
​
The name was familiar to some of the higher ups in the Brethren, and I’d heard some stories. Not sure which were true, but the long and short of it was that the Di Cesare’s and the Brethren shared a bloody history, and didn’t particularly like each other too much.
​
George Bundy explained it to me like this at one point: ‘The Di Cesare’s are an old family. Most of them used to be witches, up until their Matriarch turned them into vampires. Now they’re a whole new kind of nasty. Far as I know, the only time anyone’s actually managed to kill one was about 200 years ago. Anyone who’s tried since has ended up dead, so most folks don’t even bother anymore.’
​
I guess it shouldn’t have been surprising they’d be involved in the Imperium, but the mere mention of their name ruffled some feathers higher up on the chain of command, and eventually they put out a kill order on them. Most of the Di Cesare’s were generally pretty hard to track down, but the top brass had a pretty good line on their matriarch, Bianca Di Cesare. Supposedly, she’d been spotted near the family’s private estate in Brazil and rumor had it that most of her daughters were there too.
​
Normally, the brass wouldn’t have sanctioned any kind of attack on them. The Di Cesare’s were already considered off limits, and attacking them at their private estate was considered damn near impossible. The estate was located in a small mining town outside of Manaus called Refugio de Julia, or just Julia for short. The town was fairly remote, being only accessible from a few backroads and most folks tended to avoid it, claiming they’d had various strange encounters in the area. Their accounts described unsettling pale figures with dark hair and large green eyes working in the mines, although some of the more disturbing stories we heard involved sightings of other creatures in the jungle surrounding the town. Massive spiders with humanoid faces, tending rotting corpses filled with stinging bees, giant howling beasts who tore through the forest, hunting prey, and beautiful women who would appear in the nearby towns, betwitching men into coming away with them only to reveal themselves as monsters who fed on the blood of their victims. Some had even claimed the Di Cesares themselves were such beasts… although those claims weren’t taken quite as seriously.
​
A skeptic might say the stories that surrounded Julia seemed like little more than just local superstition… but the Brethren had been dealing with the supernatural for long enough to recognize when something was probably real, and when it was probably fake and they knew damn well that most of the stories about Julia were probably true. None of them had ever dared set foot in Julia to find out for sure, since doing so would probably be suicide, but the theory was that the Di Cesares had created Julia as something of a refuge for other creatures. Other vampires, werewolves, arachne, karah and all sorts of other hellspawn. They offered them a home and safety in exchange for their labor in the mines. Hell, the name of the town more or less spelled it out.
​
Refugio de Julia
​
Julia’s Haven.
​
Julia had been the name of the only member of the Di Cesare family that the Brethren had ever killed, so I guess it was only fitting they named the town after her.
​
I honestly think using other creatures like them as a workforce was a bit inspired… since it made Julia damn near impenetrable. Reaching their estate at the far side of the town would have been impossible without being noticed by every creature of hell living in that town, and odds are they’d tear anyone apart long before they even reached the gates of the Di Cesare estate. And if one had the bright idea to approach the estate from another angle, they’d be trudging through miles and miles of rainforest to do so, only end up face to face with a massive stone wall that kept the rainforest out.
​
In effect - the Di Cesare estate was a fortress. Getting in would be no easy feat, to say nothing of confronting the vampires within. But with the fear of the Imperium gnawing at the back of their minds, the Brethren had finally set their minds to trying.
​
George Bundy had been the one in charge of planning the operation out.
​
I’d known Bundy before I’d joined up with the Brethren. Hell, Bundy was the whole reason I’d joined the Brethren. He’d been my CO a number of years back, and he’d earned his reputation as a hardass just about ten or twenty times over. Bundy was a gruff looking man with a bushy moustache and intense eyes. During the years I knew him, I don’t believe I ever once saw him so much as crack a smile. He only ever seemed to speak when he felt there was something he needed to say. Otherwise, he was usually dead silent.
​
He was somewhere in his late fifties back in 88. By all rights, he ought to have retired years ago. But he refused.
“I’m a soldier,” He said, when I asked him about it once. “That’s all I am. I don’t know what else to be.”
​
Bundy’s initial plan had been to hit the Di Cesare estate from the air. Come in fast and loud with a couple of helicopters and see how those vampires stood up to some good old American flak. The idea got shot down pretty quickly, so to speak. Apperantly, most if not all of the Di Cesares had cursed their own bodies, causing whatever wound one inflicted on them to appear on whoever it was who had wounded them. Going in guns blazing would have ended in a bloodbath… and not for them. There were also some concerns about drawing attention from Julia. With no conclusive data on just what they had living in that town, there was no guarantee we’d be safe in the air. A few eyewitnesses had described seeing giant nests in some of the trees in the jungle, supposedly consistent with the nests made by harpies.
​
Flying in guns blazing was out. So Bundy went back to the drawing board and what he came back with… well, it was ballsy, but it almost seemed like it just might work. During his reconnisance of the Di Cesare’s estate, he’d noticed a large but shallow tributary flowing into the amazon river that led right through the Di Cesare’s estate. Along the tributary was an abandoned water mill, that connected to the Di Cesare estate.
​
He’d suggested using the water mill to gain entry to the grounds, and from there, move on the Di Cesare’s. That plan had been approved, and Bundy had been allowed to handpick his team for the operation. He’d chosen fifteen men, all of them ex military, most of them having served under him before.
​
He’d told us we would be dividing into three teams of five men each. We would leave Manaus by boat, and land at three different areas near the tributary before making our way to the mill on foot, where we would regroup, before moving on the Di Cesares. The reason for the division was to ensure that if any of our teams ran into trouble upon making ground, the entire operation wouldn’t be compromised.
​
Team 1, led by Bundy himself would depart first and land to the west of the tributary. Team 2, led by a man named Ferdinand Hernandez would make land about fifteen minutes later near the mouth of the tributary and Team 3, to be led by me would land fifteen minutes later to the east.
​
On the day of the operation, I sat in my boat, watching as the other two left. It was twilight when we set out, and I remember that as my team and I carried out our final checks on our equipment, the only thing I felt was a familiar anticipation.
​
I’d hesitate to call it fear. Fear is what came later. Anticipation is the better word. I knew we could be walking into a tough situation… but I trusted Bundy. I trusted he’d run a smooth op. God knew, he’d done it a thousand times before.
​
The team assigned to me wasn’t anything particularly special. They were competent enough, but none of them would’ve been my first choices. Jack McMullen, for instance, who was about the same age as I was at the time. We’d both served under Bundy before, although while I respected Bundy, Jack was wholly devoted to him. I swear, if the man had told him to stuff a live grenade up his ass, Jack would’ve done it without a moments hesitation. I dunno if Jack simply saw him as the father he’d never had or what, but he damn near worshipped Bundy.
​
I can’t quite say the same for the other guys we had with us, though. One of them, some greenhorn by the name of Pearce Wilson struck me as an airheaded pretty boy who’d never actually had his boots on the ground before, while the other one, Scott Barber had left a bad taste in my mouth last time we’d worked together. Barber was capable… but he was violent. This was a kid with a hell of a chip on his shoulder, and it looked a hell of a lot like that Confederate flag patch he wore on his jacket. He wanted an excuse to shoot something, and I don’t think he cared what. Under most circumstances I’m not sure I would’ve fully trusted him with a gun.
​
The last one though, Joseph Feng… him I trusted. Feng was the one I knew the least about, and he didn’t seem much for conversation. But he handled himself competently enough and seemed to know when to sit down and shut up.
​
When Team 2’s boat was far enough away, we got the radio signal to follow. Barber was the one steering the boat, so I gave him the order to cast off and we ventured out into the twilight, unaware of just what was waiting for us out there.
​
***
​
We landed in our designated area fifteen minutes after Team 2 confirmed they’d touched down at theirs. Our landing was fairly uneventful. Feng, Barber, and I secured the boat before we radio’d Bundy to let him know we were in position. After that, it was just a matter of making it to the tributary.
​
As we ventured into the jungle, the world around us was quiet. There was wind, the whisper of the river behind us, and the sounds of animals. But little else. The river fell away behind us as we moved in single file toward the tributary, maintaining radio silence as we did.
​
It was about a half hour before we heard the gunshot.
​
Just one, echoing through the twilight. But it was enough to give us pause.
​
“The fuck was that?” I heard Barber ask. Immediately, the kid was on high alert, with his gun raised as if he were expecting every monster in Julia to come charging at us from all angles.
I just listened, waiting to hear if there was anything else. I half expected my radio to come to life, but it didn’t.
“Team 1, status?” I asked.
The radio crackled with static, but there was no response.
​
I tried it again, but still with no success. The radio was working, that much I was sure of. Something had to be blocking the signal.
“What’s going on?” Feng asked.
“Dunno,” I replied. “Comms are down.”
“Down?” Wilson asked, “So we’re flying blind out here, then?”
“More or less,” I replied.
“What do we do? Do we go back… if the comms are down…”
“Just because something’s jamming our signal doesn’t mean we’re made,” I said. “Relax. We keep moving for now. You keep your eyes wide open, and your head on a swivel. We’ll make it to the tributary and see if we can’t meet up with the other teams.”
I could tell Wilson wasn’t a fan of my answer, but I didn’t much care. We had a job to do, and I aimed to do it.
​
I pressed on without a further word and the others followed. Up ahead, I could hear the sound of running water and picked up the pace. I figured the tributary had to be close… and I was right.
​
I emerged from the brush into the stream, only to pause when I saw what was waiting for us in the water.
​
In the dying sunlight, it was impossible to mistake the bodies sprawled out on the rocks as anything else… and all I needed to do was look at their uniforms to know they were our people.
“Jesus…” I heard Wilson say under his breath. He froze up, lingering by the bank as I cautiously approached one of the bodies.
​
It belonged to a somewhat heavyset man with a thin mustache who I recognized as Hernandez. His eyes were still open, although lifeless and staring in different directions, and there was a clean hole in his forehead where a bullet had ended his life. The gunshot we’d heard earlier had likely been the sound of his death.
​
Looking at the bodies around him, I knew they had to be the rest of Team 2… although it was a little harder pinning down their cause of death. Some sort of bladed weapon, perhaps, judging by the state of them. I realized the odds were that they walked into some sort of ambush.
“What about Bundy and Team 1?” Jack asked, “Any sign of them?”
“No,” I said. “These bodies are all from Team 2… Bundy could still be ahead of us.”
“Then we need to keep going!”
​
Jack turned, heading up the stream and Barber was right behind him. Feng paused for a moment, thinking this over before following. Only Wilson remained.
“How do we know we’re not walking into a trap?” He asked.
“We’ll deal with that when we get to it,” I said before moving to follow the others.
“With all due respect, Sarge… that doesn’t sound like the best course of action!” Wilson argued, finally following me. “It sounds just like a good way to get killed!”
“Yeah?” I asked, “I’m gonna tell you an ugly truth, kid. That’s the job. Make your peace with it, and it’ll go a lot easier.”
​
Wilson didn’t like that answer either and trailed off behind me, watching as I continued upstream. For a moment, I half expected him to go back to the boat… but no. I dunno if he found his balls or just didn’t want to get left behind, but he started to follow us again.
​
I kept trying to raise Team 1 on the radio while we walked, although I still had no luck. The light above us slowly faded into darkness as we trudged through the water in silence, guns sitting comfortably in our hands and mosquitos biting at our necks.
​
It wasn’t until we lost Feng that I heard anybody so much as make a sound, and when we lost Feng… it happened almost instantaneously. One minute, he was at the head of the group, walking just ahead of Jack and I. The next, he was gone, only barely having the time to let out a scream as he fell into the river ahead of us.
​
The rest of us paused. Jack seemed to freeze and I pushed past him, calling out for Feng as I did. As punishment for my compassion, I almost went down after him. I only barely stopped myself from stepping on the slippery rocks that had helped send him to his demise.
​
I could see Feng’s body in the water, and I could see the blood pouring out of him. He twitched a few times, but I knew he was dead. The sharpened wooden spikes jutting out of him confirmed as much.
“What the hell…” Jack said under his breath, staring at Feng’s corpse in disbelief. “That’s a fucking spike trap!”
​
Yeah.
​
It was indeed a fucking spike trap.
​
I could see other spikes jutting out of the water ahead of us, just past a small dam of rocks that were just slippery enough to make it difficult to stop yourself from falling. Some of those spikes had other bodies on them… likely members of Team 1. I only counted two, although that still didn’t exactly bode well.
​
“They put a fucking spike trap in the goddamn stream…” Jack said, “Who the hell does that?”
“Somebody who’s expecting us to use the stream,” I replied.
“So they know we’re coming?” Barber asked.
“Clearly…” I replied. “And they’ve got a good idea on what our route is too.”
​
“Yeah, no shit!” Barber snapped. “Christ… let’s get the fuck out of here. There’s probably more fucking traps upstream!”
“Bundy’s orders were clear!” Jack argued.
“Bundy’s probably dead by now!” Barber replied, before looking at me. “Sarge, come on. You have to know this is suicide!”
“Suicide was part of the job description, was it not?” I asked.
“The job is to kill those fucking vampires, not to die in the goddamn process! We need to get out of the stream and into the woods!”
​
“Judging by the fate Team 2 met, I’m not sure the forest is someplace we want to be right now,” I replied.
“Excuse me?” Barber asked, “What the hell are you talking about, Sarge?”
“Five men dead, but only one gunshot. How did the rest die?”
​
Barber didn’t seem to be able to answer that.
“By now… yes. It’s clear we’ve walked into a trap. And yes, I understand that it makes sense to try and leave that trap… but I don’t know if we’ll be safer in the jungle. Something jumped Team 2. Cut them apart, and then shot Hernandez as a warning. They didn’t have to shoot him. They did it so we’d hear.”
“Your point being?” Barber asked.
“I don’t think this is just a trap, Barber. It’s a game. Stop playing, and you might just end up like our friends downstream.”
“A game?” Wilson asked, “Sarge, you can’t be serious!”
​
“From where I’m standing, we have a better chance of surviving in the stream,” I said. “Look, we’re at least halfway to the rendezvous point, and there have to be at least two members of Team 1 left. The safest thing to do right now is to follow them.”
“You’re off your fucking rocker, Sarge,” Barber spat, locking his eyes with mine. For a moment, I thought the boy was going to try and fight me. But no. He was wise enough to stand down.
“If you wanna get yourself killed, go right the fuck ahead. Just leave me out of it! Wilson, come on,” Barber said before trudging over to the edge of the stream. Wilson didn’t even hesitate, just looking back at Jack and I quietly before he disappeared into the forest with Barber.
​
“You’re not gonna stop them?” Jack asked.
“No,” I replied. “God willing, there’s a chance that pigheaded asshole is right… dunno how much of a chance, but a chance.”
“Then how come we’re not following him?” Jack asked.
“There’s also a chance he’s wrong.”
I turned, before making my way around the spike trap.
“Keep a slower pace,” I said. “Watch for traps.”
​
Jack hesitated for a moment, but he followed me without any further questions and we walked in silence for a little longer.
​
We heard nothing from the trees. Nothing that told us about the fate of Barber and Wilson. I wasn’t sure if that was good news or not.
​
In fact, I don’t think we heard a thing until about a half hour later, when we heard the explosion.
​
It came out of almost nowhere, but ahead of us I could see a flash of light and hear the screams of men. On instinct, I found myself picking up the pace and could hear Jack behind me. In the low light, I saw a shape float past me in the stream. It took me a moment to realize that it was a severed human arm.
​
In the water ahead of us, I could see a figure clinging to one of the rocks and trying to pick himself up. I recognized him as George Bundy.
​
Jack was at his side almost immediately, trying to help the old man to his feet.
“Sir! Are you alright?”
Bundy just wheezed, before his legs gave out from under him. I helped Jack drag him to the shore so he could sit and rest for a moment.
“What the hell was that?” I asked, looking back at the stream.
“Grenade trap… I think…” Bundy panted, “Fucking tripwire… Popkov tripped it, I think…”
​
Popkov… odds are he was one of the two mangled corpses lying in the river a few feet away from us. It seemed they’d taken the brunt of the explosion, although Bundy still had some shrapnel in his arm that Jack was tending to.
“Christ… whole fucking ops gone to shit…” Bundy spat. “Team 2 got taken out just about as soon as they landed. Someone killed them and dumped them in the goddamn river. Lost half my boys to the fucking spike trap and half to this…”
​
He looked up at us, before spitting onto the ground.
“Guess you two haven’t done much better.”
“Hard to say,” I replied. “Two of ours took off into the woods, trying to avoid the traps.”
“Then they’re dead,” Bundy replied. “I’ve seen her watching us… always just up ahead, always from a distance… she’s seeing how far we’ll go. How much we’ll take…”
“She?” I asked.
“La Morte. Should’ve figured she’d be the one to greet us.”
“La Morte?” I asked.
​
“It’s Italian. Supposedly, she earned that name around the time the Di Cesares fled Venice. It’s funny, the Brethren like to act like the Di Cesares leaving Venice was some big victory of theirs, since before they did, they finally killed one of them… hard to call it a victory though, considering how many corpses they made before they fled. And most of them came from La Morte…”
Bundy winced in pain as Jack bandaged his arm before he continued talking.
​
“See… when the Di Cesare’s left Venice, one of them stayed behind. Clementine, the Scorpio sister. Guess she was unwilling to leave the fight unfinished… and according to the stories, the death toll she personally amassed in the years after the Di Cesare’s left Venice make the bodies they claimed during the Venetian Massacre a hundred and fifty years prior look like a pittance. The Brethren still occupying the city started to call her La Morte. Death. Cuz wherever she went, death followed in her wake… and it seems we’ve walked right into her open arms, haven’t we, boys?”
​
“You’re sure it’s her?” I asked.
“She’s a Di Cesare… and the shit we’ve seen out here… I don’t see any other Di Cesare setting those traps. It’s her. I’m sure of it. She’s watching us. Seeing how far we’ll go. Seeing if we’ll turn tail…”
“Should we?” Jack asked, and Bundy finally seemed to acknowledge him.
“Excuse me?” He asked.
“Should we? Look, sir… I’d follow you into the mouth of Hell, but right now, we’re down from fifteen men to three. Can’t say I’m optimistic about our chances right now. If this woman is half as bad as you’re saying she is, maybe it’s time we took a step back!”
​
Jack looked at me, hoping I might back him up, but I remained silent.
“What the hell are you talking about?” Bundy asked.
“What I’m hearing here, is that as of right now, the vampire out there could kill us at any time. She hasn’t. Far as I’m concerned, that’s mercy. Maybe we should be taking it while it’s offered.”
Bundy stared at him, before chuckling. I think it was the first time I’d ever seen him laugh.
​
“Just walk away, then?” He asked.
“Walk away, and come back better prepared!” Jack corrected.
“Walk away,” Bundy said again. “We walk away now, and there won’t be a chance to come back better prepared. We get one shot at this. One. Failure is not an option. We go in there and we kill them or we die. End of discussion.”
“And how exactly are we even supposed to kill them?” Jack asked, “That curse they have… bullets aren’t gonna do shit, sir!”
“Yours won’t, mine will…”
Bundy pulled his pistol from his holster. I noticed some sort of pattern crudely engraved on it.
​
“I’ve been doing some research… studied the curse they put on themselves… and I think I’ve found a way to break it. Not sure if it’ll work yet… but we get one chance to test it.”
Jack stared at the gun, then back at Bundy.
“Sir… do you hear yourself?” He asked quietly, “You can’t be serious… right now, even with that gun we don’t stand a chance in he-”
​
The gunshot echoed through the forest and made me jump. Jack’s voice died in his throat as he hit the ground.
​
Bundy stared at him for a moment, before huffing and holstering his pistol again. He draped his coat over his shoulders, before looking over at me.
“No room for failure, Frank,” He said calmly.
I didn’t know what to say to that. I stared down at Jack’s body, my mouth hanging open slightly. When I looked back at Bundy, he was already back in the stream.
​
There was a tense silence between Bundy and I as I followed him along the final stretch of the tributary. He trudged on ahead, covered in sweat and straining with every step, but I could sense the quiet determination he had to see this through. Looking at him, you could’ve told me that George Bundy could wipe out the Di Cesare’s all by himself and I would have believed it in a second.
​
The night around us was full of sound, and each one drew my attention. I watched the forest, expecting to see some sign of La Morte watching us. But I saw nothing, except for what she wanted me to see.
“Mill’s just up ahead,” I heard Bundy say as we pressed on, although I noticed his steps faltering as he seemed to notice something in the trees above us. I stopped behind him, looking up before seeing what he saw, and when I saw it I felt my stomach turn.
​
I’d seen death before.
But what Di Cesare had left out for us… that was something else.
Pearce Wilson and Scott Barber weren’t dead.
But if they could have spoke, I’ve got no doubt they would have begged us to kill them. Wilsons pretty face was covered in blood and his pouty lips were parted as more trickled out of him. His curly blond hair was matted and I could see crimson there. Tree branches portruded from his ribs, while the loops of his entrails dangled out of his opened stomach. And Barber was in just about the same state, only he seemed to at least have the ability to turn his head to look at us.
​
I think he might have tried to speak, but the only sound he seemed to be able to make was a pained whimper.
“Jesus Christ…” I said softly.
“He had nothing to do with this,” Bundy replied. He took one last look at the two dying men hanging from the trees, before moving on.
“We should put them out of their misery, sir,” I said.
​
Bundy paused, before looking back at me.
“Don’t waste the ammo, Frank,” He replied. “They’re already dead.”
“Not yet they’re not!”
“Give them time. They chose to go into the woods. They can live with the consequences… for however long that lasts.”
​
With that, he left them. If I were a more compassionate man, I would have put them out of their misery. But no. Bundy moved on and so did I.
​
He approached the water mill, before examining it. It was an old building, made of stone that had long since been overgrown by moss, and sat right on the wall that separated the Di Cesares estate from the amazon. It hardly looked secure, even if the only entrance hadn’t just been an old wooden door secured with a padlock, finding a way in wouldn’t have been difficult. And it didn’t take much for Bundy to break through that door. All he needed was a couple of well placed kicks and it swung right open.
​
Drawing his gun, Bundy strode inside and I followed him.
“The Di Cesare’s will be in the main house,” He said. “We should find a way in through the back, try and catch them off guard. Main target should be the matriarch, Bianca. Her we should prioritize keeping alive… the rest are expendable.”
​
“Much as you are, I’m sure.” A voice called from deeper in the mill, and both Bundy and I froze.
I noticed movement on the floor above us, and through the shadows, I saw a tall woman watching us. She was dressed all in black, with blond hair tied back in a ponytail and the intense eyes of a soldier.
​
This had to be Clementine Di Cesare.
​
Bundy aimed his pistol at her, although she only barely seemed to notice.
“Only two of you left… I’m not sure the odds are in your favor,” The woman said. Her voice was low, calm and quiet.
“Only one way to find out,” Bundy growled.
“And only one way to walk out of this place alive,” Di Cesare countered. “You can put the gun down, turn and walk away. I won’t stop you. There’s no shame in living.”
​
“All the bodies you’ve left in your wake… that’s rich,” Bundy said.
“I don’t relish what I’ve done. I simply don’t know how to do anything else,” She replied. “Think about this, Bundy. Over my lifetime, there have been countless thousands who have come to kill me. All of them are dead, but I am not. Even if you could kill me… you could not kill my sisters. Not all of them. Not before they came for you.”
“Just you, would be enough…” Bundy said, before pulling the trigger.
​
I knew he’d hit her. I knew the bullet pierced her shoulder. But that woman… she didn’t even flinch. She simply dove out of the way before he could shoot again, taking cover and avoiding his next shot.
“Frank, upstairs!” Bundy snapped, “Flush her out!”
I went, trudging up the old wooden steps with my rifle drawn. Only to see Di Cesare vaulting over the railing and back down to the ground floor as soon as I made it up there.
​
Bundy shot at her again, only to miss for a second time. I saw Di Cesare’s arm move, and heard him cry out in pain. In the low light, I could see a dagger protruding from his shoulder. He stumbled back a step, leaving himself open for only a split second.
​
That second was all it took for Di Cesare to raise her own gun and fire just one shot.
​
George Bundy hit the ground without so much as a final scream. There was just a simple hole in his skull where she had shot him.
​
I felt my heart start to race faster. My eyes settled on Bundy’s gun, and I ran for the railing, vaulting it and dropping to the ground below with a thud. Di Cesare shot at me, and I felt the bullet tear through my leg. I reached out for the fallen gun and grabbed it before turning it on Di Cesare, only to find myself staring down the barrel of her own pistol. My finger rested on the trigger, but I didn’t have the guts to pull it.
​
"Kill me, and you will not see the sun tomorrow." She said, her voice still cold and calm.
“Killing you is part of the job…” I replied, but my finger still couldn’t squeeze the trigger.
“And is it worth your life?” Di Cesare asked. “You fail your mission either way.”
“And die with some goddamn honor…”
“There’s no such thing as honor. There is alive and there is dead. Choose.”
​
I knew what I was supposed to choose.
​
But my hands were shaking, as I stared into the face of death. My finger couldn’t squeeze the trigger.
​
The gun collapsed to the floor and Di Cesare kicked it away from me, before huffing and lowering her gun.
“Do not return,” She said softly. “Or next time, I will unleash a hell upon you that will make you beg for simple traps.”
​
She picked Bundy’s gun up off the ground, and then she was gone. After I finally picked myself up off the ground, I was gone too.
​
As I walked back along the stream… I passed the corpses of the men we’d left behind. Barber and Wilson, Jack, Feng, Hernandez, and his team. The flies were already feasting on them. Animals had already torn at them. And as I looked down at their cold corpses, I knew I had made the right choice.
​
I filed my report with the Brethren. Told them that Di Cesare had wiped us out, and a few months later I quietly retired. I never looked back.
​
***
​
“You walked away from her?” Sweeney asked in disbelief, “You had her dead to rights and you walked away from her?”
“I chose to live,” I replied. “Can’t say I regret the decision either. Because of the choice I made, I met my wife and had my kids. I’ve lived the life I had because I chose not to throw it away on some vampire.”
​
Sweeney just shook his head.
“You could have gotten the first confirmed kill on a Di Cesare in two centuries, and you threw it away you fucking coward! I could execute you for that!” I noticed his hand hovering over the gun on his hip.
“You could.” I replied, before quietly unholstering the pistol I kept at my side. I aimed it at Sweeney’s head.
​
He stared at me like a slack jawed idiot.
“Would you like to give it a try?”
“W-what…?”
“Would you like to give it a try, Mr. Sweeney? Or would you like to see the sun tomorrow?”
He stared down the barrel of my gun, and I already knew what his choice would be.
​
Sweeney took a step back. I saw his hand move away from his holster, and I lowered the gun with a huff.
“Thought so,” I said.
Mr. Sweeney left me without another word.
I knew he would not return.