Bookkeeper jobs near me

So after a long day cutting the cake and taking pictures,l offered to send my girlfriends best friend home as her house is near mine...
In the car she was already asking me about my sex life with my girlfriend so one thing led to another and she asked me to finger her while driving, she slid her panties off and I ran my fingers down her skirt and began touching her , she did the same to me , she pulled my d**k out and began stroking it.
She and I then continued at her house and we showered together, and ended with cuddles.

Feel free to DM with any questions/requests. Taking payments as F&F only (vouches here: https://www.reddit.com/RepVouch/comments/wge6n6/uencrypted_curse/ + I'm a trusted member of the QReps Discord). Open to meetups in the Boston area.
TIMESTAMP AND TAGGED PICTURES: https://imgur.com/a/Zg31AsA (REP), https://imgur.com/a/4CFeN42 (RETAIL)
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Yeezy Season 6 work jacket
Size: M (fits TTS)
Condition: 10/10, brand new/unworn
Price: $100 + shipping
Notes: Famous BOUND2™ batch. Very nice crop. Heavy/quality material. Just not my style.
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Undercover FW02 Rebelgods jacket
Size: L (fits closer to an M in my opinion, but will work well for either size because of raglan sleeves)
Condition: 10/10, brand new/unworn
Price: $90 + shipping
Notes: I'm a certified Deeds hater but he did a good job with this one. Just doesn't work with my wardrobe.
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Comme des Garcons Homme green reversible logo waffle knit long sleeve
Size: S (fits TTS or M)
Condition: 10/10, brand new/unworn
Price: $42.50 + shipping
Notes: Soft, thick material. Can be worn on both sides, so I've cut off the inside tag on the side.
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Margiela GAT sneakers (classic white/gum colorway)
Size: 44 (fits US 10.5-11)
Condition: 10/10, brand new/unworn
Price: $65 + shipping Notes: Playershoes batch. QReps staple. Only selling because they're too big for me.
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[RETAIL] Undercover Records lined coach jacket
Size: L (fits TTS or oversized M)
Condition: 7.5/10
Price: $75 + shipping
Notes: Minor cracking on the back print. These are going for $160-200 on Grailed.
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[RETAIL] US military surplus cold weather cap/helmet liner
Size: 7 1/4
Condition: 10/10, brand new/unworn
Price: $9 + shipping
Notes: Similar to the General Research arabic parka hood.

https://www.eldorado.gg/valorant-accounts/oa/00ddbfc4-d658-41fa-9589-1dd8d0557f8b
Message me if you have any questions!
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Full Bundles: Prime/Ruination/RGX2.0/Arcane Top Guns: Reaver Vandal,Oni Phantom, Magepunk Op, Elderflame Op, Glitchpop Vandal, Prime (Bundle) , Spline Op, 2022 Champions Phantom and card, 2021 Champions vandal and card. Jinx Sheriff (Arcane)(Bundle), RGX, Ruination (Bundle) (Not including battlepass guns!). Nebula Sheriff

TLDR: Had a ONS with ex colleague at dream company 6 years ago who has since been promoted and offered me a job in his department. Should I consider it?
So, I (32F) recently made a career move. I am learning quickly and reasonably happy, but the company is making lots of cuts and people keep disappearing without explanation so it's a little worrying as this is very different to what I have been doing for the past 6 years. Although my manager assures me I'm doing fine, I feel a little out of my depth and anxious about my job security.
Flash back: When I first moved to the city 9 ish years ago, I (23 at the time) got a fairly junior role in my dream company. After a drunken night out 2 years in, a colleague, let's call him Harry (40M at the time) in a different team who I had limited interaction with at work, came back home with me. I later found out he had a long term partner despite telling me he was single. Due to lack of space to progress, I had already handed in my resignation at this point and later moved to a new role in a similar department to his in a new company, where I stayed for 6 years. Those final 2 months were incredibly uncomfortable and the guilt ate me up. Harry has since married this partner who as far as I am aware, has no idea about any of this.
I recently attended a 60th birthday celebration for an ex colleague at this company, the first time I had seen anyone from this time of my life in 6+ years. During the event, Harry not only made a beeline for me, despire my plan to stay out of his way, he also offered me a role in his department. Apparently applications so far have been really poor quality, so if I apply, it's a done deal. It would be significantly more money than I earn now, and I had a great relationship with the senior execs back in the day (who also at the party) so I feel the role would be pretty secure. It wasn't awkward with Harry and over 6 years have gone by without contact, and we have both moved on with our lives.
It seems like a good opportunity to grow but I feel uncomfortable about being directly managed by someone who cheated on their current spouse with me (despite me not knowing this at the time!) I also have a minor worry that he may try something else which would put me in a really horrible position.
Should I at least learn more about the role? Or should I let it go? The only reason I left in the first place was because at the time I wanted to try something new and there wasn't room to progress due to budget cuts. But other than that one night, I was really happy there. I guess part of me figured he would have left by now, it really is my dream company and part of me always figured I would end up back there. Has enough time passed?

This is mostly a vent post, so feel free to ignore it or take it down if it doesn’t fit. I haven’t been actually diagnosed with CPTSD, so maybe I shouldn’t post this anyways.
This is the year I turned 30, and in the past I would tell myself if I didn’t have it together by now I’d end it. And now I’m still alive and still unsure.
I’d have to do a whole other post about my “parents”, but it’s really: my mother had custody and there was a guy that she would marry and divorce every now and then that wasn’t my father and was a huge part of why I’m so broken.
My actual father is great, and he was literally forced away by threat of murder, so he just paid child support the whole time and tried his damndest to get me, but the courts sided with the mother no matter what. I feel ashamed for him that I am the way I am, because he deserves better than me in my current state.
But in the present: I don’t feel like I’ve really gotten better. I’ve been in and out of therapy for like 14 years now, on various medications. They’ve always just said depression and general anxiety, but none of the treatments seem to have stuck, or didn’t help much? I’ve had some various therapists though. Some where I get blamed and say I’m just playing a victim, or that I should give up on my dreams because her son was trying the same thing I did and didn’t succeed, so don’t bother (music, by the way).
I’m trying. I really am. I’ve been trying ever since I got kicked out. I’ve recently gotten sober and stopped smoking 3 years ago. I did some self harm a year ago, but otherwise okay. But it’s like, everything hits me so much harder than others. I’ve worked with people that did full time college and work, and I struggled with full time work and part time college. People dying would ruin the whole semester for me and I’d give up for years.
I'm on a waitlist for a psychiatrist. Just signed up for another therapist that I don’t have money for. I’m establishing a relationship with my dad after so many years being apart, he missed my whole childhood. I feel like I’m not enough. I’m 30. I should be better. I shouldn’t be broke, living with relatives, working a dead-end retail job.
I don’t know what to do or who to turn to. I don’t really want to just whine and complain to my dad about this all the time because he doesn’t deserve this. He says I can ask for anything and he’d do it, but I don’t feel I deserve that.
Sorry.

Hey guys, sorry for a rant.
I'm 25 years old, I'm in Spain, I'm Russian, and I don't know what should I do now, because everything just went so hard downhill, after government just made huge mistake towards me.
What happened is that, when I went on 20th of February to the government office, I didn't expect being archived by United Nations High Commissioner for Refugees on 7th of October, just because they sent me a letter, that I have never received, and probably wouldn't be able, because databases between them and police aren't just synchronized, but second problem was that this letter have never existed in the first place.
Because of this huge mistake, I lost my job, my stable income, my bank account were frozen, and my savings were literally eaten, during period of waiting.
Then, on April, I got my papers back, and I was being able to work a bit, but then I got laid off, because I was working on someone else's place, during their sick leave. But still, it's not enough to cover my bills, even a little. I'm extremely depressed, meds aren't helping, even medical hormone treatment takes almost 1 year to start, because there is just not enough medical stuff in my city.
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[TRIGGER WARNING]
To be honest with you guys, I'm extremely thinking of unaliving myself, because living in the constant fear for my well being, while being constantly under stress, is just too much for me. As for now, exists only two ways for me, going back to Russia, and being prosecuted and being unalived there, or just take manner in my own hands.

please point me in the right direction if i’m not asking in the right thread, im very new to reddit! basically though my friend wants me to me move into her house after her housemate left in puerto rico until she moves to the states next year. she is a native puerto rican, bilingual (obviously) and rent is not too much, like $300. i’d love to get to live with my friend, get out of my parents place finally (i’m 21), and i’ve enjoyed pr whenever i’ve went to visit her. i’ve been learning spanish for a while but am still no where near an employable level, so does anyone have any tips? anyone who has moved to a country where they can’t speak the language but got employeed? are all online/remote/WOH jobs bogus or could i find a legit one to make income while i’m there?

I posted this to /truetf2 as well but could not cross post.
I've been sitting on this for a little while now and I've hit the point where any questions I have about it I can't fully answer on my own. To make a long story short for a while I've wanted to simulate random bullet spread in this game to figure out how much of a difference it makes. Doing that in TF2 would be slow and have a ton of errors but if I could figure out how to simulate it externally, that would allow me to create extremely large amounts of data and test a lot of scenarios. The problem is I didn't understand how random bullet spread works, specifically what makes it random.
How does random spread work?
To figure that out first I looked at the code. Searching about this topic always lead me back to the same /truetf2 thread and this comment which links to TF2-Base and has this chunk of code:

 // Get circular gaussian spread. float x, y; x = RandomFloat( -0.5, 0.5 ) + RandomFloat( -0.5, 0.5 ); y = RandomFloat( -0.5, 0.5 ) + RandomFloat( -0.5, 0.5 ); 

This seemed useful because it at least implies they are handling the angles in x and y rather than using some other coordinates but it also raised some questions. If I assumed the function RandomFloat was gaussian, why are two calls being added together? I also wasn't sure if the arguments passed were limits being placed on it or something else. Digging further I got to this file with another relevant code block.

 //----------------------------------------------------------------------------- // A couple of convenience functions to access the library's global uniform stream //----------------------------------------------------------------------------- VSTDLIB_INTERFACE void RandomSeed( int iSeed ); VSTDLIB_INTERFACE float RandomFloat( float flMinVal = 0.0f, float flMaxVal = 1.0f ); VSTDLIB_INTERFACE float RandomFloatExp( float flMinVal = 0.0f, float flMaxVal = 1.0f, float flExponent = 1.0f ); VSTDLIB_INTERFACE int RandomInt( int iMinVal, int iMaxVal ); VSTDLIB_INTERFACE float RandomGaussianFloat( float flMean = 0.0f, float flStdDev = 1.0f ); 

Those two calls are to the uniform random variable function, not the gaussian function. From a quick google search I did find that this is a way to approximate gaussian distributions but with only two it should like basically like a triangle instead of a smooth gaussian. There are a few reasons I could think of why they did it this way but the important thing is they return values between -1 and 1, which implies the variables scale some other value.
Every tf2 weapon has a ctx file that holds variables about it and the shotgun has four, one for each class and they are basically identical. In each of those there is a variable named Spread with a value of 0.0675. That's far too small to be degrees but for radians it seems about right and implies that the random pellets from a shotgun can take a maximum angle of 0.0675 radians from center in x and y.
All of this would be relatively simple to simulate but I couldn't find hard numbers on the fixed spread pattern and wasn't sure the values even meant what I thought they did. TF2-Base as far as I'm aware isn't the actual code as well, so maybe whatever Valve has internally is different. So I decided to test it.
Experiment setup
I created a map that contained a single room with one wall textured with the solid blue dev texture. The bullet decals were all replaced with a small gradient so they were identical and easier to see compared to the default. On accident I also discovered that setting decals to 9 removes the single perfectly accurate shot, which is lucky because it simplified processing later.
To run the test I selected engineer and bound a single key that would shoot and call impulse 101 to reload. A python script would automatically send a keypress, wait for the recoil to settle, then take a screenshot (which was also cropped to just a small region the bullets could land in). I let this run for a couple hours and generated about 3,800 screenshots. I could have also toyed with the host timescale to speed up this process but I was worried it could possibly have other effects that might invalidate all of this.
Data Processing
Making the wall solid blue made processing the data very simple. At first I intended to make the decal red, but alpha weirdness I don't understand made them black. That meant all I had to do was select the blue channel and then invert the image so that all the decals went to the max value and the wall texture went to zero. This was passed to a function that can find local maxima and it would return the location of each pellet. I had also taken a single screenshot of the fixed spread pattern and another where I used the measure texture. These gave me a perfect center and a conversion to hammer units from pixels. From this data I converted back until I could determine the angles in x and y. Some shots did overlap and were lost but they shouldn't dramatically effect the end result.
An example of the screenshot, with the processed version next to it, and all of the bullet decals automatically circled is below.
https://i.redd.it/z3r2wcfmt83b1.png
Results
As expected, the maximum magnitude for the angles was about 0.065. Getting exactly 0.0675 would be unexpected because it is the least common value and there is going to be some error. A histogram below shows all of the angles I found:
https://i.redd.it/zwa01nqnu83b1.png
Unexpected Findings
This is where things started to get weird. I had created a scatter plot of each shot and after a while realized it didn't have enough points.
https://i.redd.it/u8utncwpv83b1.png
3,800 shots times 9 (with some losses) should be over 30,000 individual points easily. There should be overlap in the middle where they are closer to max probability but even then the center should be nearly colored in. As it turns out a lot pellets were landing in the same spots. Even stranger is that I was getting exactly repeated shots. The example shot from the first image occurred 23 times. I didn't test for any symmetries so it's possible those also occurred.
I've come up with a few theories on what is going on:

1. TF2 is using a table based random number generator. This is how Doom handled random numbers, at least partially for demo compatibility and it did have effects in game. Some weapons couldn't deal the maximum damage the gamecode implied elsewhere but can in sourceports that change how this work. Of the theories this one is the least likely, but it's not impossible.
   
2. The RNG used is bad. There are a bunch of ways to create bad RNG but unless it was a mistake I can't think of a reason why they would stick with it. A good RNG shouldn't have significantly more performance overhead.
   
3. New seeds are frequently generated from player input. Of the options this seems the most likely because if it is the case I created the worst possible scenario. There is only one player input occurring and since it is automated it should be almost exactly the same. There isn't mouse input that should be a good source for seeding, no real inconsistency in key press time, and there is nothing else that should be calling the RNG to help advance it. The other related possibility is that maybe calling impulse 101 or any of the other tweaks I made are causing an issue.
   
4. I screwed up in some other way I haven't thought of. This one I view as the second most likely explanation.
   

One of my reasons for sharing this now is that I am not sure how to figure out the correct results. I can think of some ways to test out option 3 but they would significantly complicate scripting and possibly require active input which would be tedious. If that is the reason I got weird repeats, the data would be useful in implying that the code is working the way I'm assuming it does.
The other reason for sharing is if it does turn out to be issue 2 or 1, that could imply other effects that I haven't tested. These things are unlikely to be noticed in game, but if we for example knew shotguns with random spread almost always put more pellets to the left of the crosshair that may be significant. Or it's option 4 and I can't find the problem on my own.
Below is a google drive folder that contains basically everything I used and another write up I need to edit. There are a lot of pictures you can view and a zip of them to download. There's also a spreadsheet containing all the shot locations that gives slightly different min and max values, probably due to differences in float precision and tangent calculations compared to how I actually did the analysis.
https://drive.google.com/drive1/folders/1vFadC98NJKTdTYBPiJVP2uDY7OOtt7_5
TLDR
I tested the random bullet spread in TF2. If I'm right random pellets can be a maximum of about 3.9 degrees off from a straight line down the crosshair. There was some weird stuff that could be a mistake that makes this all pointless, but it might be nothing or it might imply this game is even more broken than most of us assumed. If there are any source engine wizards out there I would love to get some feedback on what they think is going on.

Hi! So I’m a 20 year old that’s completed 3 semesters of college at my state university, I’m in an IT role in the national guard part time and have my security plus as well as a TS clearance. I’m very very new to the it/cyber world but have found a passion for it and want to invest in a career.
My question is I am pretty set on switching schools to online at WGU and am not sure wether to pick Cybersecurity degree, seemingly the most technical and involved but also longest, IT (a descent in between), or IT management (which kinda sounds like a waste of a degree to me but would be the fastest to complete I believe). I was hoping to have your guys opinion on long term best options for hirability and career choices as well as if all of these degrees could lead to the same outcome if it would be worth it to just do the fastest/cheapest one.
From what I’ve researched, it seems like my best bet for jobs would be to start in an entry level IT/help desk role for a few years and learn the fundamentals and then make the switch to cybersecurity soon after inmy career or go for a higher level position in IT like management or some admin role. Is that correct??
Any advice/mentorship would be so appreciated. I’ve been stuck stressing about this for too long

I am depressed and also have scoliosis. It’s very hard for me to work a physically demanding job, but my bills require me to work a higher paying job like a factory job. I am currently an egirl on OF and I make enough to support my boyfriend and I but it is very hard when he will not work. What’s even harder is on top of him not working or providing any income for the past 2 years, he has made jabs saying I don’t do anything??? When he is actually the one who isn’t doing anything??? He treats me awful most of the time which brings down my self esteem and makes it very hard to feel pretty enough to make content I actually feel is good enough to post on it. He is on lamotrigine and it has helped a lot but I am still getting delusional comments about how I don’t do anything when it’s actually the opposite, I do everything and pay everything and he does nothing. How is this level of delusion even possible? What medication could he start that would bring him to reality?

This will most likely be a long post so buckle down if you're interested in reading it.
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My GF and I met sophomore year of college and very quickly hit it off. This transformed into my first serious relationship. I had one prior short relationship in high school and prior to meeting my gf was a virgin as well. Overall just very inexperienced in the world of dating and relationships. Our relationship was incredibly strong for close to two years but as with any it had its ups and downs. The downs, at least for me, seemed to slowly begin heavily outweighing the ups and the anxiety and stress of the relationship began crippling me. The constant criticism and silent treatments from my gf when I would do something that would upset her absolutely killed me inside. Seeing someone who was supposed to love me act like I didn't exist killed me to no end. Along with the silence caused by her being upset, she also began shunning and ignoring me anytime I took part in school/club activities or when I would hang out with friends so I began to pretty much become a hermit to avoid upsetting her. My confidence in myself was absolutely shot towards the end, it genuinely felt like I could not make her happy. The unhappiness took place both in private and in public. Friends and family of mine could visibly tell she was upset with me when we would all be together and she would criticize me for the smallest things around others. Eventually it became too much so I decided to break up with her after a little over two years of dating.
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We were separated for about 6 months with no contact when I decided to break it by asking her a question. From there conversation started flowing with both of us living in new cities for work. We talked through text and phone calls for a couple months before meeting in person for the first time in about 9 months. The months texting and calling her made me miss her immensely and idolize the good moments of our relationship. We agreed to get back together in a long distance relationship. With me still being in college and taking mostly zoom courses and her working full time I took the majority of trips to visit her and we developed a solid system for the first couple months. However, the topic of the breakup and time apart was a constant sticking point for the first couple months. She knew I had hooked up with a couple different girls during the time apart and I knew she hooked up with a couple guys. In my mind, ignorance was bliss so I never pressed information about it but she wanted to know EVERYTHING. Going as far as dming girls that she knew I slept with, taking their word entirely over mine. This topic was incredibly difficult for us but with time it faded. After I graduated I began working full time as well, we both still lived in different states so we continued long distance. However, even with me working full time as well, the burden of travel still felt like it fell on me. I was visiting her probably twice as much as she was visiting me and as a result I was stressed from long hours at work and little time to recharge. This would be over soon though as her job would be relocating to the city I lived in. This first job I had out of college was brutal and honestly awful. It broke me emotionally and I ended up applying and getting a remote job in a completely different field. With this job being remote I moved to her city to work for the last month or so before we moved back to my old city and into an apartment together. Things were going very well but we both struggled with mental health issues, and for me the anxiety of the relationship was increasing again. With us now living together and both of us working from home, we spent almost all of our time together and it felt like the criticizing and stonewalling from her was becoming very common. We fought often, almost daily for stretches of time and neither of us really had any where to go. Similar to the first time, it felt like I had to walk on egg shells. She had to know everything I was doing, it felt like she constantly found something to be upset about, especially if we were out with friends or family. A new developing aspect was the constant double standards in the relationship. She would attack me for having to go on work trips and not being able to be on my phone during the day or at night very often while she would also go on work trips and completely ignore me while she went out drinking with coworkers, often not even sending a text throughout the whole night. She would criticize my work around the apartment while it felt like she bore close to none of the chores and left them all on me. I was the primary cook for us and at times she would get upset and angry if I struggled on a new recipe or took much longer than expected. Like before I felt like I could not make her happy and my confidence was destroyed. I made the decision to break up with her AGAIN. After this breakup I was given a new job opportunity in a new state so I took it hoping to have a fresh start.
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This brings us to now pretty much. I was set to move two months after the breakup. The first month was no contact unless it had to do with the apartment we were previously sharing. In the month prior to me moving I ended up visiting her twice, the first to grab some things but we ended up watching a movie together and catching up as friends. Nothing happened. The second time we ended up being intimate and similar to before all the feelings of the relationship came rushing back and we both wanted to be back in each others lives. We texted constantly during my move and eventually she came to visit me. We talked and got back together in another long distance relationship. Things were again great at the start, we were both very open with our feelings and emotions regarding the past. She asked if I had been with anyone in the months we were broken up this time and I told her I had been with two girls, this obviously upset her but we talked through it and things seemed fine. The toxic aspects have since popped up again, frankly this time the worst that they ever have. More infrequent because of the long distance, but more severe. It started with her searching through my phone when I drank too much one night and passed out. There she saw that when were broken up I had talked to some girls casually on tinder, she herself also talked to guys from tinder. She again went as far as texting these girls from my phone without me knowing. It had been months at this point so none even responded. I didn't know she had seen these texts until the afternoon the next day. She had been quiet and off most the day and broke the silence by telling me about the "size" of the partners she had when we were first broken up. This crushed me, she continued telling me details about them being together, how long, and how they made her feel. Frankly this broke me for a while, it was constantly on my mind but she managed to convince me that what I had done in the past warranted her telling and using this against me. Time passed and we moved on but later she found a girl I had followed on insta when we were broken up and that I had followed her sister. I honestly remember viewing this girl's profile but never followed her and this mystery sister actually did not exist to my knowledge. I'm still baffled about what girl she saw that I was following. Then came the next verbal attack, she berated my about my standards, calling me disgusting and the girls I had talked to disgusting. She followed this up with attacks about how she could get any guy she wants, and at one point, using my insecurities around my finances, work, and her previous partners against me by saying "maybe I should just leave you for a guy with more money and a better career" and comparing me again to her past partners. I didn't sleep that night, she had drank that night and the next morning did not remember the fight, I brought it up and she apologized and looked appalled at what she had said. Again, this shook me for a while but I moved past it. Now for the event that has stuck with me for awhile and frankly has made me feel nothing but disdain for her. I was a groomsmen in my best friends wedding. His bachelor party weekend started off well communication wise between my gf and I until I noticed it started getting cold from her. We eventually had a disagreement over text about me not caring about what we were talking about. I did care but I really didn't show it, I made the conversation around it much shorter than it should've been when I should've asked her to speak about it after the weekend. The next day she said I didn't actually care when I asked her to keep me updated on a work project she had. This really upset me and I told her it felt like she thinks very lowly of me. She got very upset from this and flipped it onto me claiming that I had developed a sense of "entitlement" when in my mind it felt like I was standing up for myself, something I struggled with before. The next major event came on the actual wedding weekend. The wedding rehearsal went fine with me texting her throughout about the plan and what time she needed to get there for the dinner. She showed up close to an hour late, and immediately upon meeting her at her car to walk her up it was evident she was in a bad mood. She flattly ignored me the entire dinner, causing multiple of my friends to ask if her and our relationship were okay. I played it off like nothing was wrong. At the end of the night we were talking with some friends who asked if we were going out for drinks. I had already told my girlfriend that we wouldn't since we needed to take care of my parents dogs. My friends and us were the last ones at the venue. My girlfriend said she was going to run to restroom, she was there for quite awhile so we went looking for her. When someone checked and saw that the bathroom was empty I checked her location and there I saw her, 20 miles away on the highway driving to her apartment. I had flown in for the wedding so she was my ride for the weekend. I was left alone in the middle of downtown, carless and needing to get home to feed my parents dogs. I absolutely lost it and shamefully my temper lost it too and I got into a shouting match with her. I forgave her that night. We reconciled and the next day I left early to get ready for my friends wedding. Again she showed up 40 minutes late, missing most of the ceremony. Things seemed fine though and the night was going well. My anxiety was incredibly high that day and adding some drinks into the mix made a bit of a stressed mess. She consoled and helped calm me down so that I could have fun. At the end of the conversation I mentioned that before we left we needed to grab my bag from a friends car parked across the street. She lost it, calling me selfish and inconsiderate and plotting to go out with friends that night even though I told her we couldn't. I felt belittled and demeaned and ended up walking away to a different part of the venue to calm down. I went out to the front for the send off where some people talked to me about after party plans. I told them I couldn't because I had to take care of my parents dogs. I waited for my girlfriend around the front till I saw her getting her car from valet, looking fully prepared to abandon me again. When I caught up with her we talked for a second before one of the bridesmaids I knew came up making sure I knew what bar everyone was going to. Again my girlfriend lost it, this time yelling at both me and the bridesmaid. When my gf stormed away the bridesmaid told me I shouldn't be with her. I ended up driving my girlfriend and I home and we fought the whole way. It became one sided about halfway through when I asked her if she thought I was beneath her and without hesitation said yes. I sat there silently till we got home. When we did she began crying and got into the drivers seat and drove away, incredibly intoxicated but eventually came back. The next day I asked her if she actually that I was beneath her and she said no.
​
I haven't felt love for her since. I've felt frankly numb to her most of the time and when I replay the ways she's treated me I just feel anger. But I hate the idea of hurting her. I kept it bottled up for about a month until I brought it up a week ago. I asked her if she really did think I was beneath her, she said we had already talked about it but I told her I was more upset that she never apologized. It felt like in that moment she tried to deflect by asking if I was going break up with her since I like to bottle up things that upset me till I hit my breaking point. I told her no but it didn't feel like she truly grasped how much her actions had been hurting me. I let it all out and talked about everything with her. She seemed genuinely remorseful and talked about how she didn't know how hurtful she'd been and that she had been trying to work on herself and make her better. I felt better in that moment, but the next couple days I kept thinking about it. In this conversation she said that she didn't know the wedding weekend was awful for me and that she thought it went great. I honestly cannot wrap my head around thinking that weekend went great. I've been putting on a "brave" face and acting like I'm fine but inside, nothing has changed, I don't love this relationship. She's currently in a stressful period with moving apartments, her family is helping and all of us are going on a week long vacation next week. This brings me to my question, with us being long distance how do I end it and when should I?
​
Thanks if you've read this far!
​
TLDR: I'm in a toxic on and off again relationship that's long distance, how do I end it with her currently stressed from moving and us supposed to be going on vacation next week?

Hello burbank! We are the Burbank Library and we post weekly round-ups of upcoming events and services for children, teens, and adults at our three locations.
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Im a noob hobbyist, so be gentle.
I just started using helix and i really love the experience compared to vscode which i was using before.
I am having alot of trouble gettin grust-analyzer to work properly. Usualy when i open the main.rs file in helix i can press "space" + "k" on a function and it gives me its definition. This works almost always just once. After that, it gives me Errors like "Async job failed: request xy timed out".
Im on windows and i think i have added rust-analyzer to Path (if that means editing the enviroment variable and adding the path to rust-analyzer). As im pretty new to this stuff i am at my wits end here and would love some help.
thanks :)

I am absolutely struggling to find a store I can go to, in person, to try clothes on that have more then three items.
I prefer to wear business casual (sometimes business professional) on a daily basis, regardless of where I'm going and it seems like the options for this have all but dried up. I recently stopped into Lane Bryant full of hope because their website had a plethora of decent options but the two stores near me were 1/2 underwear, 1/4 clearance, and 1/4 jeans and t-shirts. After a lot of searching from the sales associate and myself I managed to find a pair of slacks and two blouses but it was slim pickings. I also struggle because I am a size 14/16 which is fairly popular so stock ends up being low when I go out.
Was wondering if anyone had recommendations? Or the opposite - even a "Hey this place has been pretty bad" is appreciated. I want to be able to go and try on clothes, because ordering online, trying on at home just means that I'll end up with clothes that won't fit and I'll forget to return.
I tried Torrids, Lane Bryant, American Eagle, Old Navy to list a few... I'm at a point where I may throw the casual to the wind and start wearing a three piece suit everywhere.
I'm based in NE TN too - if that helps.

"Self improvement ego" is a term I coined up. It's what happened to me. It's when you perceive yourself to be better than other people because you're on self improvement and get an ego because of it.
Before I was lower in my journey, did a lot of bad habits, didn't really do anything with my life.
Then I found the self improvement videos. The concept of reading books, meditation, working out, quitting bad habits, etc.
I struggled for a long time, then I started making some progress.
​
Before since I was lower, I did a lot of bad habits, but now I saw progress because I was working out and reading self help books like the compound effect and atomic habits, I deleted tiktok, quit my bad habits, started getting consistent...
then that's where the ego started.
I believed I was "better" than other people because I did self improvement. I had a level of arrogance. Because imagine, you're the loser, not doing anything with your life, then you start working out, you start reading books in your free time instead of playing video games, you wake up early to do work, you're going to see someone else vaping and you're going to subconsciously think "I'm better than them." You're going to think "I'm better than average, i'm better than normal people". and you're going to start having an ego. I workout, and that guy sits at home. "I'm the winner, he's the loser."
​
That's a dangerous mindset to have.
To believe you're better, or above other people is dangerous.
I think in the self improvement space, it's normalized. "HoW to GeT aheaD of 99% of PeoPle" "DoN't StaY AverAge", "- This habit - will MaKe YoU bettEr than 90% of mEn".
It causes you to have an us vs them mentality. You think I'm doing all the things, I'm reading, meditating, working out, doing all my work, I don't watch porn, use tiktok, or play video games anymore, so I'm better than those losers. I'm the winner, they're the loser. Haha, I'm BETTER than those people.
​
You also get a somewhat preachy attitude. And act as if you're a Christian preacher knocking door to door sharing the words of the bible or something. So you tell people what to do. "Stop doing -this-." "Start doing -that-"
​
​
How to get rid of this mindset.
Humility.
It's easy to think of yourself as better than other people, but you need to analyze your weaknesses.
You're making progress, but you're probably still not that great. There's a lot of room for improvement.
​
​
What do I mean by live and let live.
Lead by example, not by telling people what to do.
Some people don't want to do what you do. Some people don't want to quit weed. Some people like doing bad habits. Some people don't care about working out. So let them do what they want! You're not their Mommy. They can make their own decisions. THEY NEVER ASKED FOR YOUR INPUT. SO LET THEM DO WHAT THEY WANT.
Live the life YOU want to live. Don't pretend you're someone you're not. But let other people live the life THEY want to live.
You have to let people do what THEY want to do and let people live the way THEY want to live.
My new idea of thinking is it's not my job to play hero. It's not my job, to tell someone to quit playing video games. It's not my job to tell someone to quit smoking weed. it's not my job to tell someone to go to the gym. it's not my job to tell you about meditation. It's not my job to tell you why you should or shouldn't do this or that.
I'm not the hero who has to "save other people." Before I thought I was.
​
The truth is, people make decisions that align with their thoughts. They WANTED to smoke weed. They WANTED to not go to the gym and be out of shape. They WANTED to scroll tiktok/snapchat all day. They wanted to do whatever they're doing now.
If they wanted to do something, who are you to tell them they can't?
Live and let live. Live the life you want to live, and let other people live the life they want to live. That's my new stance.
And you're still allowed to share your opinion, but not in an overbearing way. You can say "You're on tiktok a lot..", or "Want to go to the gym with me", and if they say "No" then it's not your job to force them, because it's their choice anyways.

Took me about two years but I finally watched it lol. It was so wholesome, seeing the kids all grown up and create a wonderful future for themselves. I was teaching during the pandemic so the vaccination special but very close to home for me, I had to take breaks while watching because I remember the fear I went through having to work while not being vaccinated and it was a lot. I still really loved the special and I feel like the writers did such a great job commenting on things in a way that didn’t feel overplayed or annoying. I loved it! It also reminded me of way back before it came out when I participated in this writer’s room where we wrote a spec script for what we thought the pandemic special was going to be like. Crazy memories. Anyway I really loved the special and I’m glad I could finally watch it.

Here’s my silly testimony. I’m autistic by the way. Not related to my testimony, but it will explain a lot of my behaviors in this story.
These are not very recent events by the way. Except the last part about the job stuff.
I was raised Christian but I didn’t know much about Christianity. All I knew was to hate lgbtq+ people, pray for my food and pray before bed, but I never knew who I was praying to and why. I was just reciting the same script over and over. Nobody told me why Jesus died.
So I tried to fulfill myself with other things. I tried EVERYTHING. New Age spirituality, some nerdy philosophy stuff, smoked lemongrass at some point because a friend told me it worked for them (it doesn’t and it’s actually really silly in retrospect (but it smells GOOD(and makes really really good tea))), therapy, antidepressants & Ritalin (ADHD meds* (there’s a footnote at the bottom of this post)), but none of those gave me fulfillment.
I had deconstructed and I tried EVERYTHING to avoid Christianity. Something about just hearing about Jesus gave me an ick and made me want to throw up. I was part of the queer community (still am now) and participated in a lot of the hatred against Christians because a lot of them hated us back.
I was FAR from God. I was a passionate atheist and I’d ignore and laugh at every testimony.
An evangelist came up to me one day and asked me if I knew Jesus Christ, I said I did and they said something but I zoned out and started crying because I was already really stressed and overstimulated at that point and it was a bad time to come up to me.
Anyway, I got a Christian partner later on, and something about her was off. She never got really angry at me. We did have our disputes because it was human, but she dealt with it so well, it was uncanny. There was something about her that was so peaceful. This energy.
I knew a lot of good secular people who lived great lifestyles, but something about her… it’s hard to explain.
I decided to try and deconstruct her. So I showed them a bunch of videos by Genetically Modified Skeptic (great channel btw) and they kinda just giggled.
I was like… hello??? I had managed to deconstruct a lot of my Christian friends, but something was WRONG with her. Usually they were all left speechless and then I caught them at a dead end when they said something along the lines of “mysterious ways” and I led them to atheism or agnosticism.
But no. She didn’t care about theology. She had God IN her. She did defend a few things, but she said there’s no point in bombarding me with apologetics because no amount of theology would be enough to bring me to God.
I later decided I wanted to break up with them because I decided she’s a terrible person that needs a God to do good deeds or something along those lines. But I knew that wasn’t true. She did too. It’s much deeper than that. There was some sort of other force in her making her so… nearly perfect. And it wasn’t afterlife fear. She didn’t even believe in hell. She believed everyone went to heaven eventually and focused more on the now and the blessings God could bring her and how she would bless people around her.
I was confused. And ANGRY. We didn’t break up just yet, and she decided to bring me to a church. Sadly, the church was too overstimulating to me and I DID end up having a meltdown. A bad one. An embarrassing one. A PUBLIC ONE. Probably traumatizing to everyone around me. Some guy said I was possessed, which made it worse. 🙃
But that was no biggie, we just decided to do it at home because it was safer for me. We listened to a few old Hillsong songs and Gungor stuff and whatever. I put on my noise cancellers because I didn’t want to hear any stupid Christian music.
And she told me I’m TRYING not to listen and purposely blinding myself and since God was definitely not real to me, it shouldn’t be such a problem to hear a Christian song. I was really hurt by that (because I’m emotional as hell), but I did listen to the music. I liked it for the way it sounded, it had a nice rock vibe to it and it was way better than a lot of the CCM I grew up with.
I didn’t understand what the music was for…? But she then tried to pray for me and I was hesitant to stay in the room and let her do it, but at this point… what did I have to lose?
This is the silly part. Don’t remember what she prayed about, but man, I started crying. I thought I was about to have a meltdown, but the room was really quiet and I had my noise cancellers on and my shades and my leg warmers so I had not much reason to have one.
I got a tickling feeling in my chest and tears came out. Tears I was bottling in for YEARS. I just felt… amazing. It was awesome. It felt like my inner child came back to life.
It also turned out she was praying for me behind the scenes for a bit before that.
I was really really at peace and joy for the next few days. No, it wasn’t enough to turn me Christian because I still was avoiding that area and still really certain I was right, but I became agnostic because you can’t just IGNORE that. I was open to anything. Most of my anxiety (the irrational kind, not the anxiety of me worrying about having another public meltdown or the silly social anxiety) cleared up. I previously thought I had a personality disorder because I heard those can’t be cured and medicine didn’t work for that anxiety for me. But it was gone all of a sudden.
We’re still close friends. I couldn’t go to a church because of this silly disability I have, but I had this very strong conviction that I should come to Christ. So I did. Didn’t really know how to, I just declared myself a Christian. Just the label.
Then I read four gospels and Pauline stuff, watched brief summaries by BibleProject on some of the other books, and watched a lot of InspiringPhilosophy videos.
Then I decided to TRY to go to church and find the day where it was least busy so I wouldn’t have another meltdown. I made a time to go to the priest personally, and we did that, he talked about Jesus and faith and works and stuff I don’t really remember and I couldn’t really understand what he was saying most of the time (because of this SILLY disability), plus I was kinda uncomfortable because he thought I was weird and I could see it in his face.
So I just decided to watch a few sermons on YouTube because you can’t have subtitles in real life, and I talked to my friend (who was my ex partner) about it.
I have now accepted Jesus’ gift of salvation and I’ve become much of a better person.
I removed a lot of stuff from this because apparently Reddit has a 7000 character limit so I’m gonna put the rest in the comments.
Footnote: ADHD is a REAL neurological disability. I still need those meds for daily functioning, but I was saying they didn’t make me happy or fix the off-ness I felt. Please don’t stop taking your meds if you need them. While we have faith, remember to be wise. Be WISE. If your doctor tells you to take some meds, TAKE THEM. If you NEED a surgery, go to a SURGEON and not a PRIEST.

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Chapter 5 - Smoke
Northern Facility, Vanstead Dukedom of Augustein, Year 990
The building fell to pieces in a spiraling wave. From its center, the air heated until it burned to touch and stung to breathe. Fires streaked outwards, radiating like sunlight, as web-like cracks expanded throughout what was once solid walls. Then, one by one, the layers of stone fell apart. Scattered debris knocked into neighboring rooms, and more hallways pancaked beneath a growing cloud of grey smoke.
From the outside, it looked like a sudden explosion, a single attack that rendered a solid silhouette into scattered pieces. Onlookers would say they remembered hearing screams, some even recalling writhing shadows within the smoke. Still others would swear they caught fleeting glimpses of an Aberration, the creature they believed responsible for the attack. Those who believed the destruction came from within would dispute this claim, suggesting that any perpetrator would’ve died amidst the flames and rubble.
The facility, once merely an abandoned, distant old building that few travelers would give a second glance, became the talk of the town in its ruins.
It was only when the bodies were found in the aftermath that the rampant speculation quieted to whispered suggestions. No one was willing to raise their voices amidst the dead, and though the identities of the victims were unknown, that day would still be permanently marked in the town’s history as a great tragedy.
—
Winrow, Vanstead Dukedom of Augustein, Year 990
Joan slammed the drink down on the counter, and the sound rang throughout the little tavern. A few other clients glanced her way, pausing their murmured conversations. At this hour of the day, when the sun was only just beginning to lower from its peak, the tavern was still relatively empty. Once night fell, Joan knew tired workers getting off their shifts would stop by after dinner, and the place would grow rowdy with laughter.
Seated on the stool beside her, Leila frowned. She was wearing her watchman’s uniform, though she’d rolled up her sleeves. Her hands were still adorned with their usual dark gloves. In all the years Joan had known the woman, she’d never seen her take those gloves off. It was rare enough to see her without her uniform, even on days off like this one.
A watchman is never off duty, Leila had said once. Joan hadn’t been able to argue against that.
“Bad morning?” Leila asked. Joan sighed.
“You could say that,” she muttered. She picked up her glass and took a deep gulp, enjoying the bitter stinging in her throat. Leila watched her carefully.
“...Did the girl wake up?”
Joan winced and shook her head. “Not yet,” she said, voice quiet. She stared down at the uneven wooden grains of the counter, absentmindedly tracing their swirling patterns with her eyes.
Joan hadn’t known what to expect when she’d seen the smoke. It was rare enough for her to leave Winrow these days, but Leila had asked her to head to Magrath to purchase ore for the watchmen. She typically went herself, but she was busy, the woman had said apologetically. Joan was the only one besides her in the village with a high enough license to purchase the amount of ore they would need for training and scouting. Joan hadn’t been too keen on it at first, but she’d reluctantly agreed. It wasn’t Leila’s fault that the Sovereign had put a hold on temporary ore purchase permits, after all, and she’d known the woman for many decades. And so, Joan had left Winrow and made the trip to Magreth, her old court magician license nestled in her pouch beside the heavy weight of the coins Leila had provided for the purchases.
The trip took longer than expected, but she miraculously hadn’t run into any Aberrations along the way or on the road back. Instead, when she was less than an hour away from Winrow, Joan had seen clouds of smoke billowing into the sky. Instinct had taken over, and she’d ran in the direction of the smoke without thinking.
She hadn’t expected to find a pile of ruins where an old abandoned building had once stood. A crowd had gathered around, whispering and pointing at the still glowing embers lighting up the gaps between sharp debris and charred grass. Her old training had taken hold, and Joan had commanded the onlookers to search for survivors.
A few hours later, they’d found nothing but charred bodies. Her stomach roiled when she saw how small some of them were. There had been children there, trapped within those walls, when the entire building had collapsed.
An old rumor had risen up in her memory, but she’d ignored it in favor of focusing on the immediate task at hand. One of the onlookers was sent to bring the watchmen, and until then Joan sat and waited.
She wasn’t sure what compelled her to go back to the ruins and search again, some hours later. Perhaps it was the growing unease, perhaps she’d simply needed to do something. She was glad she did, otherwise she would’ve missed the motionless figure trapped beneath a pile of debris whose breaths were shallow, but distinctly alive.
“How bad are the injuries?”
Joan looked back up at Leila. She frowned, lips drawn in a thin line.
“Bad,” she said. Joan shook her head. “It’s a miracle she survived. I think the rubble might’ve protected her from the flames. Most of the wounds were from being crushed.”
Leila winced in sympathy. “Poor girl,” she muttered.
Joan grunted in acknowledgement, gaze still distant. Leila frowned at her, furrowing her brows.
“Is there something else?”
Joan stared into her drink, swirling the liquid around in one hand. She tipped it back and took a slower sip this time before setting the glass back down.
“...Do you remember those old rumors, back when the coup happened?”
Leila squinted her eyes like she always did when she was thinking. “Which ones? There was an awful lot of stuff that came out,” she remarked in a half-hearted attempt at a joke. Joan, however, remained somber.
“The experiments in northern Vanstead,” she said.
Leila’s eyes widened before the watchman’s expression morphed into a more serious one. She gripped her own cup but made no move to drink, instead simply tightening her fingers around the glass. The woman exhaled.
“I thought it was propaganda,” she muttered.
Joan shook her head. “I did too,” she admitted. “But, Leila, those scars… I can’t think of any other way to explain them. Wounds like that don’t just happen.”
Leila was quiet, eyes flickering with disbelief that slowly settled into weary acceptance. The two of them had known each other long enough for Leila to know that Joan wouldn’t be mistaken about something like this.
Joan ran a hand through her hair, tugging on some of the greying strands. “I can’t believe I ever supported the Raymoths,” she muttered.
Leila patted her back. “It’s not your fault. All of us did, including me.”
“It’s different. I was a Rose.”
“You were a doctor.”
“A doctor who healed the wrong people, clearly.”
Leila sighed and raised her drink. “It’s over now, at least,” she muttered.
Joan nodded in agreement. She held up her glass as well, and the two women wordlessly clinked their glasses together before taking long sips. They sat in silence afterwards. Around them, a few more patrons were beginning to filter into the tavern as the sun slid closer to the horizon. The noise around them grew.
Finally, without turning, Leila asked, “How much magic do you have left?”
Joan stared down at her bare hands. Wrinkles were visible on the looser skin, remnants of the passing years. It still felt odd sometimes, to not look down and see those crisp white gloves she’d worn for so long. She’d gotten another pair when she came back for when she had to use magic, ones made of thick brown cloth, but they didn’t have the same feeling.
“Enough,” Joan answered simply.
Leila’s eyes flickered over to her. She hesitated. “If you’d like, I wouldn’t mind giving you some ore. The watchmen don’t need much.”
Joan chuckled. “I don’t think a sergeant should be saying that in public.” She shook her head. “I’d rather not go to court over unauthorized ore usage.” She was already lucky enough to have retired before the coup, or she probably would’ve been killed with the other old Roses who had served the Raymoths. She wasn’t keen on testing fate again.
Leila snorted as well, but her laughter soon died down into something more somber.
“Be careful, okay?” she said. Her voice lowered, and she spoke with increased urgency. “I’m serious, you know. If your reserves get close to a third, tell me.”
Joan smiled thinly.
“I will.”
—
The house was dark when Joan entered. She fumbled around for the oil lamp she always kept by the door, then made her usual rounds of lighting the candles within the small home until the space was filled with a soft, warm glow. Joan set the oil lamp down and sighed, taking a moment to adjust to the silence. She’d ended up staying at the tavern longer than expected, and it had, as expected, grown rather loud. In the past she would’ve joined in on the rowdiness, but now she just found herself weary. She shook her head, wondering if this was what aging felt like.
Joan turned and crept across the creaking floorboards until she reached a room situated near the end of the hallway. Inhaling, she slowly opened the door and stepped inside.
Three cots had been crammed into the space, all of their sheets folded neatly and kept clean despite two of them not seeing use in a long time. A light breeze fluttered in from the open window, giving the space a slight chill that made her shiver. The curtains billowed in the wind, and Joan stepped over to close the window.
Once she was done, she turned around to stare down at the one occupied cot. Lying beneath the blankets, a girl slept so still that she could easily be mistaken for a corpse. Joan frowned and took a seat on a small stool set beside the head of the bed.
Maybe “girl” wasn’t accurate. On closer inspection, she was probably a young adult, though her malnourished limbs and closed eyes made her look much younger. Her hands were folded over the blankets, and between the heavy bandages and wrappings, Joan could make out hints of scars beneath. She closed her eyes, inhaling and exhaling. Finally, the woman opened her eyes again and raised her hands above the still form.
A soft mauve light glowed from the center of her palm. Swirling, delicate markings climbed up her arms as numbers appeared on the back of her hands. It still felt strange to see them instead of simply sensing them like she had when she’d worn the gloves every day.
​
FORM MAJOR
Magic Reserves: 39,876 → 39,864 / 118,604
Maximum Output: 12
Variability: 9
​
The light enveloped the unconscious figure, surrounding her in a soft glow. Joan closed her eyes, ignoring the immediate exhaustion that began every time she used magic these days. She forced herself to focus on the wounds.
In the back of her mind, she muttered a silent apology to Leila. But no matter what the other woman said, she had known the second she’d seen those scars that there was nothing she wouldn’t do to ensure the girl in front of her woke up again.
It was the least she could do.
​
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Royal Road Patreon

Good Afternoon All!
I've been playing my first game, and learning all the things not to do :). I started reading the wiki on Fandom and found this comment:
"Also recommended - assign your newcomers jobs first, and later promote them to Serf - that way they find or build housing near their jobs. "
As near as I can tell my people start as serfs, so I can't promote them to that rank. I thought maybe it meant to assign them a job before I 'accept' them into the village, but I tested it and that's not an option.
Could anyone tell me what this method should be? Or, if it is just outdated, what would be another good way to keep people from having long commutes?
Thank you!

i'm am lifter and i'm on a specific meal plan most days have to drink up to a gallon or a gallon and half of water a day..imagine doing that while working at a call center.....i used to stand and sit and keep moving and shaking on avail or rush calls begging team leaders and rta personnels to let me place personal aux so i can go to the bathroom...they just tell it's not our problem that you are a bodybuilder

I've been trying to clear Chapter 5 Episode 4 of the First adventure of Dai event, but it's impossible to kill Dragonoid Baran. Everytime I attack him, he recovers 285 HP, and with each of his attacks, he kills or nearly kills my characters. I have a CP of nearly 12000, but it's so easy for him to beat me... Is there any way to finish him?