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The Hater’s Guide to the 2022-23 Premier League Season: Final Matchday Edition
2023.06.03 20:49 scarsellaj The Hater’s Guide to the 2022-23 Premier League Season: Final Matchday Edition
It’s over…it’s finally over…now where am I gonna get my footy fix? “Watch the MLS?” I’d rather take up heavy drinking again. The World Cup, the Champions League, and the EPL did a number on my sanity this season. Anyone else feeling this way?
Manchester City: It looked like the monopoly was going to finally end again. City brought in a whole new squad with Haaland, Akanji, Alvarez, Sergio Gomez, and integrating academy players like Cole Palmer and Rico Lewis. The first half of the season you could see Pep’s children struggling to play with Haaland. But then…Kevin De Bruyne and Jack Grealish must’ve been juicing in the dressing room. The back half of the season saw Haaland explode with his 36 goals, the most of a single striker in a season. They not only victimized the leaders in Arsenal, they stormed the gates, ravaged the village and took the riches for themselves. AGAIN. Winning the FA Cup is routine by now. But the Champions League…That’s the main prize. Becoming the next English team to win a treble is a good add-on. Man United can punch air knowing they’re still miles behind the noisy neighbors who have now won six league titles under Pep. Better sort of these contracts for Gundogan, Laporte, and Mahrez though. Or don’t, because we know they can replace anyone with all that oil money.
Arsenal: You bottled the league title after over 264 days at the top do the league? What’re you, Tottenham??? This is shambolic squad management. Even with all those reinforcements in Trossard and Jorginho, they couldn’t keep up the pace. Not only do you lose out on the title, you went trophyless. The Cup showings were even worse than previous seasons. And you want to say it wasn’t a bottle job? My brother in Christ, you lost to Southampton. This was the best chance Arsenal has had at ending the league title drought but Arteta is still showing himself as diet Pep. Even if you do buy more exiled City players, more is still needed. Welcome back to the Champions League, I guess. It’s good having a young team like this. Do not fuck it up. Do not waste the young years of Odegaard and Saka.
Newcastle: That Saudi investment is working. The Magpies used their newfound riches to attract the likes of Isak and Botman knowing they were only a few steps away from Champions League nights. Then came the addition of Anthony Gordon because squad depth is paramount in a game like this. And they got it. For the first time since 2004, Newcastle is in Europe. Eddie Howe deserves a lot of praise for the work he has done. He’s unlocked Callum Wilson, Joelinton, Miguel Almiron and Allan Saint-Maximin. Kieran Trippier’s career has been revived. Even players like Big Bird Dan Burn have flourished. We all knew this was going to happen. Just not this soon. We now have to deal with TWO oil money clubs jockeying for the title. I can understand why haters think they’re screwed. Get your money up or get your funny up.
Manchester United: I’m going to give Erik Ten Hag a 7/10 for his first season in Manchester. He got Marcus Rashford scoring again. That was an achievement in itself. Casemiro turned out to be the best thing for United since Fergie. When he’s not getting red cards. Luke Shaw took big strides even at center back. A commendable top 4 finish and a League Cup plus the FA Cup final to round it out. They still lost some really foolish games and they had the Cristiano situation. David De Gea doesn’t look like his old self anymore either. The Glazers-to nobody’s surprise-have still not sold the club. The lack of depth signings continue. But they’re in good position for a nice run next season. Who knows, maybe the Qataris will buy the club. That’ll change things. You’ll just be like Manchester City, I’m just saying…
Liverpool: Well, well, well…Liverpool missed out on Champions League football. It was a trying season, I get it. Not having any reliable midfielders will do that. You brought in Arthur Melo because reasons. Henderson and Fabinho looked like shells of themselves. The departure of Sadio Mane rocked the team, and Darwin Nunez or Diogo Jota couldn’t fill the role. Injuries piled up and the trauma continued. Luis Diaz barely played this season because of them. Trent was cooked on defense all season long. Yet Liverpool still ground out a 5th place finish. Klopp’s not done in England yet. The future remains unclear as FSG continue pondering selling the team or giving Klopp more signings. Knowing how injured Van Djik and Konate have been, they might need it. Especially in midfield. They’re hurting bad in the middle of the park. At least you’re not Everton. Take solace in knowing Alexis Mac Allister is likely on his way to Anfield.
Brighton: Graham Potter leaving Brighton was the greatest thing to ever happen to this club. That and having the best scouting network in the whole league. Finding ballers in the South American youth ranks, the J-League and other random places formed a pesky unit of warriors. Karou Mitoma, Alexis Mac Allister, Facundo Enciso, Moises Caicedo, Pervis Estupinian, Evan Ferguson, Lewis Dunk, Jason Steele. These are the core of Roberto De Zerbi’s army of seagulls. Welcome to European football, boys. Just know you will have to start the next campaign without Mac Allister and likely Caicedo. They’ve attracted too much attention from bigger teams. Even City is sniffing around at Mitoma. I’m honestly impressed, Brighton. I’m also insanely jealous of your scouting network.
Aston Villa: Who knew Steven Gerrard was a fraudulent manager living off the success of a single Scottish title win? LITERALLY EVERYONE. Thus, Villa canned him for Unai Emery, and for the best. They went from relegation fodder to a berth in the Conference League. Ollie Watkins found his scoring touch again. Emi Buendia is now living up to the expectations (somewhat). Lucas Digne is back to Champions League-caliber. Philippe Coutinho is not even a core player anymore, just a good impact sub at this point. Villa might be punching a little above their weight but they’ve been defying expectations for a while now. With the godfather of European football at the helm, the sky is the limit. Welcome back to Europe, boys.
Tottenham: LOL Spurs always reigns supreme. I swear, it’s like rooting for the New York Mets: champagne expectations, perpetual disappointment. This season went from promising to utter dumpster fire in a matter of weeks. Antonio Conte got fed up with the players being shit again and got himself sacked promptly after that fiery press conference. Daniel Levy has never been under more pressure from fans and Harry Kane before. Spurs went from maybe squeaking out Europa League to missing out on Europe entirely. They wasted a 30-goal season from Harry Kane. Son was out of form all season. Richarlison scored 1 league goal all season. They had no defense and Lloris looks like Father Time got the best of him. Games were bottled, and through it all, they are now manager-less AGAIN. Is is time for Levy to step down? I don’t know, but he needs to do something about this team. It’s not even fun to complain about Spurs anymore. Now it’s just pure, unadulterated apathy.
Brentford: This is a fun team to watch. Thomas Frank is a magician with these players. Even with Ivan Toney going full Calvin Ridley mode, Brentford managed to win big matches when it mattered. Bryan Mbuemo played understudy to Toney most of the season but stepped up when they needed him. Rico Henry flourished at the back. Ben Mee transformed into a better player than he was at Burnley. David Raya is making a name for himself as clubs like Spurs eye him. Even Thomas Frank is getting considered for new roles. The Bees are buzzing. The West London newbies not only had a solid summer transfer window, they have finished top 10 in the second season of the big show. Now comes the hard part: next year. What do you do without Toney? Will you buy a new striker like Jonathan David? It remains to be seen, but in Frank’s Nordic vision we trust. He’s definitely got some crafty Danes or Norwegians waiting for a call.
Fulham: Speaking of West London clubs, I’m gonna buy these guys a round next time I see them. Congratulations, Fulham! You didn’t get relegated! Marco Silva didn’t even have to work miracles to do it. They played well at times, and obviously shit the bed in others. But you can’t say they didn’t fight every minute of every game. Aleksander Mitrovic finally learned how to score in the Prem. Willian returned to West London in full cry. Tim Ream made us Yanks proud as he held it down at the back. The X Factor: Joao Palhinha. You didn’t bend the knee willingly, boys. That shows character. Gotta say I’m proud. Now keep going, Tony Khan. You know they can aim just a tad higher.
Crystal Palace: Palace didn’t really do anything different this season. I say that because they pretty much finished where they always do. Comfortably mid-table again. I really thought Patrick Vieria was doing something at Selhurst Park, but then he was relived off his duties after a bad patch of form. So they decided to recycle the nostalgia and bring back Roy Hodgson…uh huh. Nothing really changes does it? Eberechi Eze turned into a special player. Zaha was Zaha, nothing new there. Jordan Ayew played solidly too. Michael Olise might be the standout player. He was really getting linked with a move to PSG to replace Messi?? I prefer not to speak.
Chelsea: Lol Spurs? No, LOL CHELSEA! We all knew the Todd Boehly takeover was gonna change things. We didn't expect a dip into total mediocrity. All while spending over 600 million quid on player signings. Thomas Tuchel was sacked....then Graham Potter got 8 months to make things worse...then they brought back Frank Lampard to see out the season because that's American forward thinking. Yea the viibes are horrendous at Stamford Bridge. Bringing in Enzo Fernandez, Chernobyl Traore in Mudryk, David Fofana, Wesley Fofana, Raheem Sterling, Kalidou Koulibaly and everyone else killed any team chemistry. Joao Felix was exiled from Atletico by Diego Simeone to basically do nothing in England for 6 months. Kai Havertz is STILL not a real striker. Auba brought back the No. 9 shirt curse. Christian Pulisic was fed up with it all and tried to force himself out to no avail. Mason Mount dropped off hard, but still has enough Englishness to warrant a move to United. The Blue Lions are dying in front of us. After years of poshness and self-absorption, they will not be playing European football next season. Thus, they brought in Mauricio Pochettino to fix things. Spurs fans everywhere are dying on the inside at their old gaffer taking the job...but it's the perfect fit for this Chelsea team. They'll be back, just wait.
Wolves: Wolves…wake up. What the hell are you doing? Why are muddling through these seasons lately? The vibes of the Nuno era are gone. New culture had to be created. Except it wasn’t. Bruno Lage was hired and did whatever it was he did. Which basically flirted with relegation. Julen Lupotegui came in after he was sacked by Sevilla and changed everything. It still wasn’t enough. The team was Ruben Neves saving their asses while Raul Jiminez continues to find himself after his head injury. Take solace in knowing Max Kilman is becoming a fantastic defender. Hwang Hee Chan looks more comfortable in England. But Wolves could be doing so much more. It’s a shame they’re gonna sell Neves. They were so close to shattering the glass season a few seasons ago. Oh how times change.
West Ham: This is the dark side of two consecutive seasons of deep European tournament runs. Your league form suffers. In West Ham’s case, it was injuries and inconsistent football. David Moyes is a decent manager but he can only take you so far. Just ask Everton fans about that. Sure you made the Conference League final but was it worth losing guys like Paqueta, Scamacca, and Antonio to the injury gods while selling Craig Dawson and sacrificing your league form? Declan Rice carried the Hammers at times. Only adding to his value as his big boy move is finally coming together. A bottom half finish is a few steps back but it’s not unexpected. It will be a big summer for the Hammers. It’s time to start planning for life after Rice. You can recover from it, but will Moyes be the guy to take you back to the top 10? You tell me.
Bournemouth: Scott Parker getting sacked in the fall saved the Cherries. Gary O’Neil had a vision for this team. They executed it well. Without his guidance, Bournemouth would surely be in the drop zone. In the first year back in the Prem, Bournemouth produced respectable results. Philipp Billing, Jefferson Lerma, and Dominic Solanke are some talented players but they have their limits. You'll be without Lerma next season since he's moving to Crystal Palace in the summer. Buying up all that European talent helped in the battle to stave off relegation, but where do you go from here? European places will be way too difficult reach with the level of parity we have now. Staying up next season will likely be the goal.
Nottingham Forest: 30 signings later, Forest avoided the drop. What else is there to say? The football was strictly average. Some players like Taiwo Ayonini lived to the hype, as did Morgan Gibbs-White. Keylor Navas was a great addition to keep the ball out of the net. Others like Jesse Lingard did not. The standout? Danilo from Palmerias, a strapping addition. Players like Ryan Yates, Brennan Johnson, and Joe Worrall proved they can hang in the big leagues. Steve Cooper is not getting sacked. But knowing how crazy the Greek overlords are, that could change on a dime. Whether you can take that next step to the top 10 I’m not sure of. Steve Cooper is strictly an average manager. A squad this big with this much high-end talent could use with a better voice. Your move, Forest.
Everton: Conglaturations, boys! You did the great escape…AGAIN. Remember last season how you said “never again?” What a load of horseshit. Everyone knew Everton would be lucky to survive given the state of the squad. When you rely on Abdoulaye Doucoure and Dwight McNeill as your main scoring threats, you know it was not going to be a good season. Try the board running fake stories about getting death threats from fans. Try fans confronting Yerry Mina in the parking lot after a tough loss to Southampton. Try sacking Frank Lampard and replacing him with Sean Dyche…actually that was a good decision. Farhad Moshiri is under serious pressure to turn things around. It doesn’t help Everton are about to get hit with FFP regulations even worse than City or Chelsea…is it worth building that new stadium if you’re playing in 2nd division? It’s not a matter of if Everton go down, it’s a matter of when Everton go down.
Leicester: Dude, what the fuck??? You’re supposed to breaking the Big 6 ceiling, not shattering your own reputation. We lauded Leicester for their recruitment and performances. But this is the fate of bundling all your eggs in the Champions League basket. Missing out on those revenues crippled the finances. Buying all those players came back to haunt them. Without Jamie Vardy leading the line, the team looked lost. Brendan Rodgers knew his time was up but was sacked unceremoniously. Dean Smith could not right the ship. After 7 seasons and three trophies later, the Foxes are back in the Championship. Such a shame. Open the flea market though. Maddison, Tielemans, Ndidi, and Barnes will all be lined up for moves to bigger clubs. Thanks for the memories, Leicester.
Leeds: Leeds are paying for the sins of Radriazzani. The guy he fumbled the bag in the worst possible ways. Forget about his off-pitch antics. This team was trying too hard to remake the Bielsa years. Fans never got behind Jesse Marsch’s American Revolution and he was kicked to curb after a shit run despite beating Liverpool. Javi Gracia took over and changed nothing. So to salvage the season, welcome back Big Sam!! loses 4-1 to Spurs on the final day oh dear lord. Even the relegation dodger himself could not fix a team that can’t connect. Jack Harrison took massive steps forward and is probably the first to go to replenish the coffers. Robin Koch will likely follow suit. Adams, McKennie, and Aaronson are definitely going to other clubs. They never got utilized correctly anyway. The vibes of the Bielsa era are gone. Every attempt to replace them didn’t work, especially if the fans weren’t willing to move on. Don’t make the same mistakes of 2004.
Southampton: The Saints go marching into the Championship. After 8 years of playing big club killer, Southampton is gone. I’m not sad about it. I hated playing against them because they’d always step up against London clubs. For a less bias take, it’s not something they could avoid. They didn’t have the talent or leadership to fix things. Ralph Hassenhuttl was largely uninspiring so it made sense when he got the boot. But Nathan Jones from Lutron Town?? That’s your solution?? That didn’t even last two full months. Ruben Selles as temp gaffer solved nothing. So now you go down without much of a fight. Thanks for giving up JWP, Armel Bella-Kotchap, and Romeo Lavia to bigger teams. You will not be missed by any teams from London.
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Manchester City: It looked like the monopoly was going to finally end again. City brought in a whole new squad with Haaland, Akanji, Alvarez, Sergio Gomez, and integrating academy players like Cole Palmer and Rico Lewis. The first half of the season you could see Pep’s children struggling to play with Haaland. But then…Kevin De Bruyne and Jack Grealish must’ve been juicing in the dressing room. The back half of the season saw Haaland explode with his 36 goals, the most of a single striker in a season. They not only victimized the leaders in Arsenal, they stormed the gates, ravaged the village and took the riches for themselves. AGAIN. Winning the FA Cup is routine by now. But the Champions League…That’s the main prize. Becoming the next English team to win a treble is a good add-on. Man United can punch air knowing they’re still miles behind the noisy neighbors who have now won six league titles under Pep. Better sort of these contracts for Gundogan, Laporte, and Mahrez though. Or don’t, because we know they can replace anyone with all that oil money.
Arsenal: You bottled the league title after over 264 days at the top do the league? What’re you, Tottenham??? This is shambolic squad management. Even with all those reinforcements in Trossard and Jorginho, they couldn’t keep up the pace. Not only do you lose out on the title, you went trophyless. The Cup showings were even worse than previous seasons. And you want to say it wasn’t a bottle job? My brother in Christ, you lost to Southampton. This was the best chance Arsenal has had at ending the league title drought but Arteta is still showing himself as diet Pep. Even if you do buy more exiled City players, more is still needed. Welcome back to the Champions League, I guess. It’s good having a young team like this. Do not fuck it up. Do not waste the young years of Odegaard and Saka.
Newcastle: That Saudi investment is working. The Magpies used their newfound riches to attract the likes of Isak and Botman knowing they were only a few steps away from Champions League nights. Then came the addition of Anthony Gordon because squad depth is paramount in a game like this. And they got it. For the first time since 2004, Newcastle is in Europe. Eddie Howe deserves a lot of praise for the work he has done. He’s unlocked Callum Wilson, Joelinton, Miguel Almiron and Allan Saint-Maximin. Kieran Trippier’s career has been revived. Even players like Big Bird Dan Burn have flourished. We all knew this was going to happen. Just not this soon. We now have to deal with TWO oil money clubs jockeying for the title. I can understand why haters think they’re screwed. Get your money up or get your funny up.
Manchester United: I’m going to give Erik Ten Hag a 7/10 for his first season in Manchester. He got Marcus Rashford scoring again. That was an achievement in itself. Casemiro turned out to be the best thing for United since Fergie. When he’s not getting red cards. Luke Shaw took big strides even at center back. A commendable top 4 finish and a League Cup plus the FA Cup final to round it out. They still lost some really foolish games and they had the Cristiano situation. David De Gea doesn’t look like his old self anymore either. The Glazers-to nobody’s surprise-have still not sold the club. The lack of depth signings continue. But they’re in good position for a nice run next season. Who knows, maybe the Qataris will buy the club. That’ll change things. You’ll just be like Manchester City, I’m just saying…
Liverpool: Well, well, well…Liverpool missed out on Champions League football. It was a trying season, I get it. Not having any reliable midfielders will do that. You brought in Arthur Melo because reasons. Henderson and Fabinho looked like shells of themselves. The departure of Sadio Mane rocked the team, and Darwin Nunez or Diogo Jota couldn’t fill the role. Injuries piled up and the trauma continued. Luis Diaz barely played this season because of them. Trent was cooked on defense all season long. Yet Liverpool still ground out a 5th place finish. Klopp’s not done in England yet. The future remains unclear as FSG continue pondering selling the team or giving Klopp more signings. Knowing how injured Van Djik and Konate have been, they might need it. Especially in midfield. They’re hurting bad in the middle of the park. At least you’re not Everton. Take solace in knowing Alexis Mac Allister is likely on his way to Anfield.
Brighton: Graham Potter leaving Brighton was the greatest thing to ever happen to this club. That and having the best scouting network in the whole league. Finding ballers in the South American youth ranks, the J-League and other random places formed a pesky unit of warriors. Karou Mitoma, Alexis Mac Allister, Facundo Enciso, Moises Caicedo, Pervis Estupinian, Evan Ferguson, Lewis Dunk, Jason Steele. These are the core of Roberto De Zerbi’s army of seagulls. Welcome to European football, boys. Just know you will have to start the next campaign without Mac Allister and likely Caicedo. They’ve attracted too much attention from bigger teams. Even City is sniffing around at Mitoma. I’m honestly impressed, Brighton. I’m also insanely jealous of your scouting network.
Aston Villa: Who knew Steven Gerrard was a fraudulent manager living off the success of a single Scottish title win? LITERALLY EVERYONE. Thus, Villa canned him for Unai Emery, and for the best. They went from relegation fodder to a berth in the Conference League. Ollie Watkins found his scoring touch again. Emi Buendia is now living up to the expectations (somewhat). Lucas Digne is back to Champions League-caliber. Philippe Coutinho is not even a core player anymore, just a good impact sub at this point. Villa might be punching a little above their weight but they’ve been defying expectations for a while now. With the godfather of European football at the helm, the sky is the limit. Welcome back to Europe, boys.
Tottenham: LOL Spurs always reigns supreme. I swear, it’s like rooting for the New York Mets: champagne expectations, perpetual disappointment. This season went from promising to utter dumpster fire in a matter of weeks. Antonio Conte got fed up with the players being shit again and got himself sacked promptly after that fiery press conference. Daniel Levy has never been under more pressure from fans and Harry Kane before. Spurs went from maybe squeaking out Europa League to missing out on Europe entirely. They wasted a 30-goal season from Harry Kane. Son was out of form all season. Richarlison scored 1 league goal all season. They had no defense and Lloris looks like Father Time got the best of him. Games were bottled, and through it all, they are now manager-less AGAIN. Is is time for Levy to step down? I don’t know, but he needs to do something about this team. It’s not even fun to complain about Spurs anymore. Now it’s just pure, unadulterated apathy.
Brentford: This is a fun team to watch. Thomas Frank is a magician with these players. Even with Ivan Toney going full Calvin Ridley mode, Brentford managed to win big matches when it mattered. Bryan Mbuemo played understudy to Toney most of the season but stepped up when they needed him. Rico Henry flourished at the back. Ben Mee transformed into a better player than he was at Burnley. David Raya is making a name for himself as clubs like Spurs eye him. Even Thomas Frank is getting considered for new roles. The Bees are buzzing. The West London newbies not only had a solid summer transfer window, they have finished top 10 in the second season of the big show. Now comes the hard part: next year. What do you do without Toney? Will you buy a new striker like Jonathan David? It remains to be seen, but in Frank’s Nordic vision we trust. He’s definitely got some crafty Danes or Norwegians waiting for a call.
Fulham: Speaking of West London clubs, I’m gonna buy these guys a round next time I see them. Congratulations, Fulham! You didn’t get relegated! Marco Silva didn’t even have to work miracles to do it. They played well at times, and obviously shit the bed in others. But you can’t say they didn’t fight every minute of every game. Aleksander Mitrovic finally learned how to score in the Prem. Willian returned to West London in full cry. Tim Ream made us Yanks proud as he held it down at the back. The X Factor: Joao Palhinha. You didn’t bend the knee willingly, boys. That shows character. Gotta say I’m proud. Now keep going, Tony Khan. You know they can aim just a tad higher.
Crystal Palace: Palace didn’t really do anything different this season. I say that because they pretty much finished where they always do. Comfortably mid-table again. I really thought Patrick Vieria was doing something at Selhurst Park, but then he was relived off his duties after a bad patch of form. So they decided to recycle the nostalgia and bring back Roy Hodgson…uh huh. Nothing really changes does it? Eberechi Eze turned into a special player. Zaha was Zaha, nothing new there. Jordan Ayew played solidly too. Michael Olise might be the standout player. He was really getting linked with a move to PSG to replace Messi?? I prefer not to speak.
Chelsea: Lol Spurs? No, LOL CHELSEA! We all knew the Todd Boehly takeover was gonna change things. We didn't expect a dip into total mediocrity. All while spending over 600 million quid on player signings. Thomas Tuchel was sacked....then Graham Potter got 8 months to make things worse...then they brought back Frank Lampard to see out the season because that's American forward thinking. Yea the viibes are horrendous at Stamford Bridge. Bringing in Enzo Fernandez, Chernobyl Traore in Mudryk, David Fofana, Wesley Fofana, Raheem Sterling, Kalidou Koulibaly and everyone else killed any team chemistry. Joao Felix was exiled from Atletico by Diego Simeone to basically do nothing in England for 6 months. Kai Havertz is STILL not a real striker. Auba brought back the No. 9 shirt curse. Christian Pulisic was fed up with it all and tried to force himself out to no avail. Mason Mount dropped off hard, but still has enough Englishness to warrant a move to United. The Blue Lions are dying in front of us. After years of poshness and self-absorption, they will not be playing European football next season. Thus, they brought in Mauricio Pochettino to fix things. Spurs fans everywhere are dying on the inside at their old gaffer taking the job...but it's the perfect fit for this Chelsea team. They'll be back, just wait.
Wolves: Wolves…wake up. What the hell are you doing? Why are muddling through these seasons lately? The vibes of the Nuno era are gone. New culture had to be created. Except it wasn’t. Bruno Lage was hired and did whatever it was he did. Which basically flirted with relegation. Julen Lupotegui came in after he was sacked by Sevilla and changed everything. It still wasn’t enough. The team was Ruben Neves saving their asses while Raul Jiminez continues to find himself after his head injury. Take solace in knowing Max Kilman is becoming a fantastic defender. Hwang Hee Chan looks more comfortable in England. But Wolves could be doing so much more. It’s a shame they’re gonna sell Neves. They were so close to shattering the glass season a few seasons ago. Oh how times change.
West Ham: This is the dark side of two consecutive seasons of deep European tournament runs. Your league form suffers. In West Ham’s case, it was injuries and inconsistent football. David Moyes is a decent manager but he can only take you so far. Just ask Everton fans about that. Sure you made the Conference League final but was it worth losing guys like Paqueta, Scamacca, and Antonio to the injury gods while selling Craig Dawson and sacrificing your league form? Declan Rice carried the Hammers at times. Only adding to his value as his big boy move is finally coming together. A bottom half finish is a few steps back but it’s not unexpected. It will be a big summer for the Hammers. It’s time to start planning for life after Rice. You can recover from it, but will Moyes be the guy to take you back to the top 10? You tell me.
Bournemouth: Scott Parker getting sacked in the fall saved the Cherries. Gary O’Neil had a vision for this team. They executed it well. Without his guidance, Bournemouth would surely be in the drop zone. In the first year back in the Prem, Bournemouth produced respectable results. Philipp Billing, Jefferson Lerma, and Dominic Solanke are some talented players but they have their limits. You'll be without Lerma next season since he's moving to Crystal Palace in the summer. Buying up all that European talent helped in the battle to stave off relegation, but where do you go from here? European places will be way too difficult reach with the level of parity we have now. Staying up next season will likely be the goal.
Nottingham Forest: 30 signings later, Forest avoided the drop. What else is there to say? The football was strictly average. Some players like Taiwo Ayonini lived to the hype, as did Morgan Gibbs-White. Keylor Navas was a great addition to keep the ball out of the net. Others like Jesse Lingard did not. The standout? Danilo from Palmerias, a strapping addition. Players like Ryan Yates, Brennan Johnson, and Joe Worrall proved they can hang in the big leagues. Steve Cooper is not getting sacked. But knowing how crazy the Greek overlords are, that could change on a dime. Whether you can take that next step to the top 10 I’m not sure of. Steve Cooper is strictly an average manager. A squad this big with this much high-end talent could use with a better voice. Your move, Forest.
Everton: Conglaturations, boys! You did the great escape…AGAIN. Remember last season how you said “never again?” What a load of horseshit. Everyone knew Everton would be lucky to survive given the state of the squad. When you rely on Abdoulaye Doucoure and Dwight McNeill as your main scoring threats, you know it was not going to be a good season. Try the board running fake stories about getting death threats from fans. Try fans confronting Yerry Mina in the parking lot after a tough loss to Southampton. Try sacking Frank Lampard and replacing him with Sean Dyche…actually that was a good decision. Farhad Moshiri is under serious pressure to turn things around. It doesn’t help Everton are about to get hit with FFP regulations even worse than City or Chelsea…is it worth building that new stadium if you’re playing in 2nd division? It’s not a matter of if Everton go down, it’s a matter of when Everton go down.
Leicester: Dude, what the fuck??? You’re supposed to breaking the Big 6 ceiling, not shattering your own reputation. We lauded Leicester for their recruitment and performances. But this is the fate of bundling all your eggs in the Champions League basket. Missing out on those revenues crippled the finances. Buying all those players came back to haunt them. Without Jamie Vardy leading the line, the team looked lost. Brendan Rodgers knew his time was up but was sacked unceremoniously. Dean Smith could not right the ship. After 7 seasons and three trophies later, the Foxes are back in the Championship. Such a shame. Open the flea market though. Maddison, Tielemans, Ndidi, and Barnes will all be lined up for moves to bigger clubs. Thanks for the memories, Leicester.
Leeds: Leeds are paying for the sins of Radriazzani. The guy he fumbled the bag in the worst possible ways. Forget about his off-pitch antics. This team was trying too hard to remake the Bielsa years. Fans never got behind Jesse Marsch’s American Revolution and he was kicked to curb after a shit run despite beating Liverpool. Javi Gracia took over and changed nothing. So to salvage the season, welcome back Big Sam!! loses 4-1 to Spurs on the final day oh dear lord. Even the relegation dodger himself could not fix a team that can’t connect. Jack Harrison took massive steps forward and is probably the first to go to replenish the coffers. Robin Koch will likely follow suit. Adams, McKennie, and Aaronson are definitely going to other clubs. They never got utilized correctly anyway. The vibes of the Bielsa era are gone. Every attempt to replace them didn’t work, especially if the fans weren’t willing to move on. Don’t make the same mistakes of 2004.
Southampton: The Saints go marching into the Championship. After 8 years of playing big club killer, Southampton is gone. I’m not sad about it. I hated playing against them because they’d always step up against London clubs. For a less bias take, it’s not something they could avoid. They didn’t have the talent or leadership to fix things. Ralph Hassenhuttl was largely uninspiring so it made sense when he got the boot. But Nathan Jones from Lutron Town?? That’s your solution?? That didn’t even last two full months. Ruben Selles as temp gaffer solved nothing. So now you go down without much of a fight. Thanks for giving up JWP, Armel Bella-Kotchap, and Romeo Lavia to bigger teams. You will not be missed by any teams from London.
2023.06.03 20:11 calvin324hk [H] 800+ games/DLCs/VR Games [W] Games/Paypal/TF2 Offers
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Endzone - A World Apart
60 Parsecs
XCOM: ULTIMATE COLLECTION
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For The King
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Pile Up! Box by Box
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Speed Limit
Totally Reliable Delivery Service
Youtubers Life
Dex
WRC 6 FIA World Rally Championship
V-Rally 4
PlateUp!
Turbo Golf Racing
Eternal Threads
The Last Campfire
Kingdom Two Crowns
Indivisible
White Day: A Labyrinth Named School
Field of Glory II
Warhammer 40,000: Gladius - Relics of War
Ice Age Scrat's Nutty Adventure
Soul Axiom Rebooted
A Little Golf Journey
Murder by Numbers
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Songbringer
STONE
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Perfect
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Sifu Deluxe Edition Upgrade Bundle (EPIC)
AVICII Invector: Encore Edition
10 Second Ninja X
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Diaries of a Spaceport Janitor
Epistory - Typing Chronicles
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Monster Slayers - Complete Edition
My Big Sister
Red Ronin
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Cat Lady - The Card Game
Undungeon
Tangledeep
Styx: Shards of Darkness
Styx: Master of Shadows
Squids Odyssey
Pendula Swing - The Complete Journey
Mists of Noyah
King's Bounty: Crossworlds
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Hero of the Kingdom: The Lost Tales 1
Epistory - Typing Chronicles
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S.W.I.N.E. HD Remaster
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Blood And Zombies
One More Island
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Slain: Back from Hell
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Aragami
Deliver Us The Moon
Anuchard
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Darkwood
Intravenous
Unexplored 2: The Wayfarer's Legacy
Interstellar Space: Genesis
Survive the Nights
Blasphemous
Unto The End
NUTS
Cat Quest
Cosmic Star Heroine
Degrees of Separation
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The Innsmouth Case
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Trine 4
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METAL GEAR SOLID V: GROUND ZEROES
Strange Brigade Deluxe Edition
Call of Duty® Modern Warfare 3™
Sniper Elite 3
Sniper Elite 4 Deluxe Edition
Amnesia: Rebirth
PGA 2k21
Jurassic World Evolution
Darksiders Genesis
Endless Space® 2 - Digital Deluxe Edition
SID MEIER'S CIVILIZATION VI : PLATINUM EDITION
F1 2020
Titan Quest
Euro Truck Simulator 2
Witch It
BEAUTIFUL DESOLATION
CHANGE: A Homeless Survival Experience
Mighty Switch Force! Collection
Gone Home + Original Soundtrack
The WB Batman Collection
Batman: Arkham Asylum Game of the Year Edition
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Beholder
Beholder 2
We Were Here Together
Kyle is Famous: Complete Edition
GRIP: Combat Racing *-GRIP: Combat Racing - Cygon Garage Kit *-GRIP: Combat Racing - Nyvoss Garage Kit *GRIP: Combat Racing - Terra Garage Kit *GRIP: Combat Racing - Vintek Garage Kit
Keep Talking and Nobody Explodes
Lead and Gold: Gangs of the Wild West
Miscreated
Second Extinction
Survive or Die
Breathedge
Dead in Vinland
Die Young
Empyrion - Galactic Survival
How to Survive 2
The Wild Eight
One Finger Death Punch 2
Power Rangers: Battle for the Grid
Slap City
Fahrenheit: Indigo Prophecy Remastered
Layers of Fear: Masterpiece Edition
Civilization: Beyond Earth – The Collection
Borderlands: The Handsome Collection
Primal Carnage: Extinction
Due Process
SimpleRockets 2
Killing Floor 2
For the King
For The King: Lost Civilization Adventure Pack
Pro Cycling Manager 2020
Tour de France 2020
Infectonator 3: Apocalypse
Warhammer: Chaosbane
Project Highrise
LAST OASIS
The Beast Inside
Terminus: Zombie Survivors
Crown Trick
Discolored
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Grand Mountain Adventure: Wonderlands
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Rogue Heroes: Ruins of Tasos
Liberated
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Nine Parchments
The Walking Dead
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Learn Japanese To Survive! Hiragana Battle
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Afterparty
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Save Room - Organization Puzzle
PlataGO! Super Platform Game Maker
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Warhammer vermintide collector's edition
Brothers: A Tale of Two Sons
Tank Mechanic Simulator
The Uncertain: Light At The End
INSOMNIA: The Ark
Darkside Detective
Shadow Tactics: Blades of the Shogun
GIGA WRECKER
Panty Party
Fell Seal: Arbiter's Mark
Tannenberg
Golf It!
Heroes of Hammerwatch
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Leisure Suit Larry - Wet Dreams Don't Dry
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They Bleed Pixels
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Smile For Me
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A Hole New World
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Shape of the World
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Ministry of Broadcast
She Sees Red - Interactive Movie
A Long Way Down
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Helheim Hassle
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No Time to Relax
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Do Not Feed the Monkeys
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Transport INC
Shoppe Keep 2 - Business and Agriculture RPG Simulation
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Mahjong Pretty Girls Battle
Mahjong Pretty Girls Battle : School Girls Edition
Pretty Girls Mahjong Solitaire
Princess Kaguya: Legend of the Moon Warrior
Delicious! Pretty Girls Mahjong Solitaire
Chaos Reborn
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Caveblazers
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Mordheim: City of the Damned
WRC 7 FIA World Rally Championship
Mana Spark
Autonauts
Nusakana
Shift Happens
Crash Drive 3
Hot Tin Roof: The Cat That Wore A Fedora
Automachef
Demolish & Build 2017
Resort Boss: Golf
Out of Space
Narita Boy
Aven Colony
Alien Breed Trilogy
Tools up
Mount & Blade
Mount & Blade: With Fire & Sword
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GARAGE bad trip
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Fort Triumph
Orwell: Ignorance is Strength
FRAMED Collection
ROTASTIC
As Far as the Eye
Cepheus Protocol
Overruled
Ageless
Giana Sisters 2D
Prank Call
Hotshot Racing
Undead Horde
Streets of Fury EX
Rec Center Tycoon
JumpJet Rex
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I am not a Monster: First Contact
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Iron Fisticle
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Fun with Ragdolls: The Game
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Smoke and Sacrifice
American Fugitive
The Signal From Tölva
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Rebel Galaxy
XIII - Classic
Comedy Night
Darkness Within 2: The Dark Lineage
FLATLAND Vol.2
The Chess Variants Club
Armada 2526 Gold Edition
Toybox Turbos
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Airport Madness: World Edition
King's Bounty: Warriors of the North
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A.I.M.2 Clan Wars
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Ascension to the Throne
Peaky Blinders: Mastermind
The Flame in the Flood
When Ski Lifts Go Wrong
Bomber Crew
10 Second Ninja X
The Sacred Tears TRUE
Fred3ric
Lovecraft's Untold Stories
Path to Mnemosyne
CastleStorm
Crush Your Enemies
Semblance
S.W.I.N.E. HD Remaster
Radio Commander
Boneless Zombie
Robot Squad Simulator 2017
Pretty Girls Panic!
Poker Pretty Girls Battle: Texas Hold'em
VVVVVV
Warhammer Space wolf
Blazing Chrome
Car Mechanic Simulator 2015
Pang Adventures
Party Hard 2
REKT! High Octane Stunts
Thief of Thieves: Season One
Trailblazers
Warhammer: End Times - Vermintide
Demetrios - Deluxe Edition
Cobra Kai: The Karate Kid Saga Continues
GemCraft - Frostborn Wrath
Nickelodeon Kart Racers 2: Grand Prix
Rebel Galaxy Outlaw
Shadowhand: RPG Card Game
Survivalist: Invisible Strain
We Were Here Too
Blacksad: Under the Skin
Heroes of Hammerwatch
Leisure Suit Larry 1-7
Murder by Numbers
Redout: Enhanced Edition
Rise of Industry + 2130 DLC
Ziggurat
They Bleed Pixels
Sunblaze
Noosphere
Train Valley 1+2
Door Kickers: Action Squad
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The Void
The Vagrant
Republique
Nephise: Ascension
Leisure Suit Larry - Wet Dreams Don't Dry
Knock-knock
Jewel Match Atlantis Solitaire - Collector's Edition
Healer's Quest
Fictorum
A Robot Named Fight!
Skautfold Chapters 1-4
Hero of the Kingdom: Trilogy
198X
Danger Scavenger
Doctor Who: The Lonely Assassins
Dread X Collection
Going Under
My Lovely Daughter
Rage in Peace
Flashback
Garfield Kart
Curse: The Eye of Isis
Amerzone: The Explorer’s Legacy
Black Moon Chronicles
Nostradamus: The Last Prophecy
Red Riding Hood - Star Crossed Lovers
Chicago 1930 : The Prohibition
Sinking Island
Haegemonia: Legions of Iron
Occultus - Mediterranean Cabal
Gevaudan
Windscape
Ultra Space Battle Brawl
Through the Woods
This is the Zodiac Speaking
The Uncertain: Light At The End
The Uncertain - The Last Quiet Day
Tales
Tales of the Neon Sea
Styx: Master of Shadows
She and the Light Bearer
Epistory - Typing Chronicles
A Wolf in Autumn
The Music Machine
Jalopy
Insane 2
Antigraviator
All-Star Fruit Racing
Constructor Plus
Ice Lakes
Knights of Pen & Paper 2
Victoria II
Kingdom Come: Deliverance – Band of Bastards
Kingdom Come: Deliverance – From the Ashes
Mindustry
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Region: NA (Canada)
Price are in USD. Fees on buyer.
CTRL + F to find your games in terms of name
Humble Keys <------ Click Here to see a full list of humble keys
Two Point Hospital
Castlevania: Lords of Shadow – Ultimate Edition
Trek to Yomi
Shadow Warrior 3
BATTLETECH MERCENARY COLLECTION
BATTLETECH Shadow Hawk Pack
Knights of Pen and Paper +1 Edition
Knights of Pen and Paper - Haunted Fall
KNIGHTS OF PEN AND PAPER 2 - DELUXIEST EDITION
Knights of Pen and Paper 2 - Here Be Dragons
Deathloop
Hell Let Loose
Hellblade: Senua's Sacrifice
F1 2019 Anniversary Edition
Valkryia Chronicles 4 Complete Edition
Mafia Definitive Edition
Mordhau
Back 4 Blood
Little Hope
Peaky Blinders: Mastermind
Visage
death stranding
Slay the Spire
Praey for the Gods
Degrees of Separation
Ghostrunner
Hellblade: Senua's Sacrifice
Control Ultimate Edition
Encore Duke Nukem: Manhattan Project
Hyper Light Drifter
Dirt 5
Ultimate Chicken Horse
Kentucky Route Zero - Season Pass Edition
Dreamfall Chapters
Wuppo
Human: Fall Flat
Northgard
The Witness
Borderlands: The Handsome Collection
MO:Astray
Metro Exodus
Pathfinder: Kingmaker - Enhanced Plus Edition
Super Mag Bot
Blade Assault
Where the Water Tastes Like Wine
TOEM
Backbone
GreedFall
Wasteland 3
GAS STATION SIMULATOR
IN SOUND MIND
MIND SCANNERS
EMILY IS AWAY <3
OMNO
ATOM RPG Trudograd
Banners of Ruin
Lawn Mowing Simulator
Legend of Keepers
Yes, Your Grace
Endzone - A World Apart
60 Parsecs
XCOM: ULTIMATE COLLECTION
PGA 2K21
Bioshock Collection
Warhammer: Vermintide 2 - Collector's Edition
JUST CAUSE 4: COMPLETE EDITION
Plague tale
Gas station simulator
Mind scanners
BATTLESTAR GALACTICA DEADLOCK SEASON ONE
Gamedec
Command & Conquer Remastered (Origin)
Surviving The Aftermath
Genesis Noir
Dirt Rally 2.0
| Stand With Ukraine Charity Bundle |
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| Cosmonautica |
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| Journey For Elysium |
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| Nelly Cootalot: Spoonbeaks Ahoy! HD |
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| Renowned Explorers: International Society |
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| THE CORRIDOR |
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| Unexplored |
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| Circles |
| Killer Bundle 25 |
|---|
| From Space |
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| Arise: A Simple Story |
| Patron |
| Baldur's Gate: Enhanced Edition |
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| Turok 2: Seeds of Evil |
| THE GAME OF LIFE 2 |
| CHANGE: A Homeless Survival Experience |
| DESOLATE |
| The Hong Kong Massacre |
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| AMID EVIL |
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| Golf Gang |
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| Dark Deity |
| Warhammer 40,000: Mechanicus |
| DUSK |
| River City Girls |
Chess Ultra
Godstrike
Home Sweet Home
Neighbours back From Hell
Pathologic 2
SAMUDRA
STRANGER
Songbird Symphony
The Invisible Hours
I am Bread
Hotshot Racing
Autonauts
Door Kickers: Action Squad
Iconoclasts
Patch Quest
Tunche
For The King
Abandon Ship
Book of Demons
PC Building Simulator
Pile Up! Box by Box
Snooker 19
Speed Limit
Totally Reliable Delivery Service
Youtubers Life
Dex
WRC 6 FIA World Rally Championship
V-Rally 4
PlateUp!
Turbo Golf Racing
Eternal Threads
The Last Campfire
Kingdom Two Crowns
Indivisible
White Day: A Labyrinth Named School
Field of Glory II
Warhammer 40,000: Gladius - Relics of War
Ice Age Scrat's Nutty Adventure
Soul Axiom Rebooted
A Little Golf Journey
Murder by Numbers
Chivalry: Medieval Warfare
Songbringer
STONE
Rescue Party: Live!
Rise of the Slime
Steel Rats™
Hue
Teacup
Perfect
Arcade Paradise - Arcade Paradise EP
Strange Brigade
Sifu Deluxe Edition Upgrade Bundle (EPIC)
AVICII Invector: Encore Edition
10 Second Ninja X
The Indie Mixtape
Diaries of a Spaceport Janitor
Epistory - Typing Chronicles
Heroes of Hammerwatch
Monster Slayers - Complete Edition
My Big Sister
Red Ronin
Heal
Cat Lady - The Card Game
Undungeon
Tangledeep
Styx: Shards of Darkness
Styx: Master of Shadows
Squids Odyssey
Pendula Swing - The Complete Journey
Mists of Noyah
King's Bounty: Crossworlds
Jotun: Valhalla Edition
Hero of the Kingdom: The Lost Tales 2
Hero of the Kingdom: The Lost Tales 1
Epistory - Typing Chronicles
Warhammer 40,000: Space Wolf Special Edition
Undead Horde
S.W.I.N.E. HD Remaster
Stirring Abyss
Scarlet Tower
Blood And Zombies
One More Island
Doorways: Prelude / Doorways: Holy Mountains of Flesh
Slain: Back from Hell
Lucius/Lucius 2/Lucius 3/Lucius Demake
Aragami
Deliver Us The Moon
Anuchard
Call of Juarez: Gunslinger
Darkwood
Intravenous
Unexplored 2: The Wayfarer's Legacy
Interstellar Space: Genesis
Survive the Nights
Blasphemous
Unto The End
NUTS
Cat Quest
Cosmic Star Heroine
Degrees of Separation
Pure Farming 2018
SEUM: Speedrunners from Hell
SUPER CHICKEN JUMPER
Syberia/Syberia II/Syberia 3
The Innsmouth Case
Tinytopia
Sniper ghost warrior contracts
Trine 4
Risen 3
Shadowgate
How to Survive
FORCED
Psychonauts
Warhammer 40,000: Space Wolf Special Edition
Sniper Elite 3 + Season Pass DLC
Sniper Ghost Warrior 3 - Season Pass Edition
METAL GEAR SOLID V: GROUND ZEROES
Strange Brigade Deluxe Edition
Call of Duty® Modern Warfare 3™
Sniper Elite 3
Sniper Elite 4 Deluxe Edition
Amnesia: Rebirth
PGA 2k21
Jurassic World Evolution
Darksiders Genesis
Endless Space® 2 - Digital Deluxe Edition
SID MEIER'S CIVILIZATION VI : PLATINUM EDITION
F1 2020
Titan Quest
Euro Truck Simulator 2
Witch It
BEAUTIFUL DESOLATION
CHANGE: A Homeless Survival Experience
Mighty Switch Force! Collection
Gone Home + Original Soundtrack
The WB Batman Collection
Batman: Arkham Asylum Game of the Year Edition
Batman: Arkham City - Game of the Year Edition
Beholder
Beholder 2
We Were Here Together
Kyle is Famous: Complete Edition
GRIP: Combat Racing *-GRIP: Combat Racing - Cygon Garage Kit *-GRIP: Combat Racing - Nyvoss Garage Kit *GRIP: Combat Racing - Terra Garage Kit *GRIP: Combat Racing - Vintek Garage Kit
Keep Talking and Nobody Explodes
Lead and Gold: Gangs of the Wild West
Miscreated
Second Extinction
Survive or Die
Breathedge
Dead in Vinland
Die Young
Empyrion - Galactic Survival
How to Survive 2
The Wild Eight
One Finger Death Punch 2
Power Rangers: Battle for the Grid
Slap City
Fahrenheit: Indigo Prophecy Remastered
Layers of Fear: Masterpiece Edition
Civilization: Beyond Earth – The Collection
Borderlands: The Handsome Collection
Primal Carnage: Extinction
Due Process
SimpleRockets 2
Killing Floor 2
For the King
For The King: Lost Civilization Adventure Pack
Pro Cycling Manager 2020
Tour de France 2020
Infectonator 3: Apocalypse
Warhammer: Chaosbane
Project Highrise
LAST OASIS
The Beast Inside
Terminus: Zombie Survivors
Crown Trick
Discolored
Everhood
Grand Mountain Adventure: Wonderlands
Nomad Survival
Sparklite
The Ramp
Valfaris
Dusk Diver
Neverinth
Tokyo Xanadu eX+
Zengeon
Spirit Hunter: Death Mark
Unmemory
Nigate Tale
Rogue Heroes: Ruins of Tasos
Liberated
Neversong
Nine Parchments
The Walking Dead
Secret Government
Monsters' Den: Godfall
Interplanetary: Enhanced Edition
Learn Japanese To Survive! Hiragana Battle
Learn Japanese To Survive! Kanji Combat
Learn Japanese To Survive! Katakana War
The Eternal Castle [REMASTERED]
THIS WAR OF MINE: COMPLETE EDITION
Cats in Time
Afterparty
Battlecruisers
Astronarch
Save Room - Organization Puzzle
PlataGO! Super Platform Game Maker
Nongunz: Doppelganger Edition
Warhammer vermintide collector's edition
Brothers: A Tale of Two Sons
Tank Mechanic Simulator
The Uncertain: Light At The End
INSOMNIA: The Ark
Darkside Detective
Shadow Tactics: Blades of the Shogun
GIGA WRECKER
Panty Party
Fell Seal: Arbiter's Mark
Tannenberg
Golf It!
Heroes of Hammerwatch
The Battle of Polytopia *DLC1. Cymanti Tribe *DLC2. ∑∫ỹriȱŋ Tribe *DLC3. Aquarion Tribe *DLC4. Polaris Tribe
Leisure Suit Larry - Wet Dreams Don't Dry
Lornsword Winter Chronicle
Oddworld: New 'n' Tasty
N++ (NPLUSPLUS)
Yooka-Laylee and the Impossible Lair
Virgo Versus The Zodiac
They Bleed Pixels
Maize
Smile For Me
The Haunted Island, a Frog Detective Game
Frog Detective 2: The Case of the Invisible Wizard
A Hole New World
Sumoman
Shape of the World
Evan's Remains
Ministry of Broadcast
She Sees Red - Interactive Movie
A Long Way Down
Depraved
Helheim Hassle
Neurodeck : Psychological Deckbuilder
Tropico 5 - Complete Collection
Escapists 2
Worms Rumble *Worms Rumble - New Challengers Pack *Worms Rumble - Legends Pack *Worms Rumble - Armageddon Weapon Skin Pack *Worms Rumble - Captain & Shark Double Pack
Achtung! Cthulhu Tactics
Turmoil
Narcos: Rise of the Cartels
Rogue Stormers
Torchlight
Fictorum
Ken Follett's The Pillars of the Earth
Moon Hunters
No Time to Relax
Overpass
Blood Bowl 2
SimCity 4 Deluxe Edition
Conarium
Brawlout
F1 RACE STARS Complete Edition Include DLC
Killing Room
Tenta Shooter / The 触シュー
Everreach: Project Eden
Railway Empire
Looterkings
Headsnatchers
Battlestar Galactica Deadlock
AIdol
Livelock
The Letter - Horror Visual Novel
F1 2018
Tacoma
Hard West - Collector's Edition
Hard West: Scars of Freedom DLC
Masquerada: Songs and Shadows
The Shrouded Isle
Joint Task Force
The World Next Door
Verdant Skies
DISTRAINT 2
Ittle Dew
Ittle Dew 2+
Oxenfree
Monstrum
Strikey Sisters
Do Not Feed the Monkeys
Cyber Ops
European Ship Simulator
Fishing Adventure
Internet Cafe Simulator
Zen Chess: Mate in One, Mate in 2 , Mate in 3 , Mate in 4 , Champion's Moves (5 games)
Transport INC
Shoppe Keep 2 - Business and Agriculture RPG Simulation
Desolate
GRIP: Combat Racing + DLC
OUTBUDDIES DX
Eidolon
Pizza Connection 3
Spartan Fist
River City Ransom: Underground
Saints Row: The Third
Koi-Koi Japan [Hanafuda playing cards] *Koi-Koi Japan : UKIYOE tours Vol.1 DLC *Koi-Koi Japan : UKIYOE tours Vol.2 DLC *Koi-Koi Japan : UKIYOE tours Vol.3 DLC
Mahjong Pretty Girls Battle
Mahjong Pretty Girls Battle : School Girls Edition
Pretty Girls Mahjong Solitaire
Princess Kaguya: Legend of the Moon Warrior
Delicious! Pretty Girls Mahjong Solitaire
Chaos Reborn
Driftland: The Magic Revival
Shadows: Awakening
Caveblazers
Fallback: Uprising
Mordheim: City of the Damned
WRC 7 FIA World Rally Championship
Mana Spark
Autonauts
Nusakana
Shift Happens
Crash Drive 3
Hot Tin Roof: The Cat That Wore A Fedora
Automachef
Demolish & Build 2017
Resort Boss: Golf
Out of Space
Narita Boy
Aven Colony
Alien Breed Trilogy
Tools up
Mount & Blade
Mount & Blade: With Fire & Sword
BLACKHOLE: Complete Edition
Detention
Downfall
Miasmata
Overclocked: A History of Violence
Silver Chains
White Night
The Cat Lady
Syberia 3
Textorcist
GARAGE bad trip
Guts and glory
Swag and Sorcery
Fort Triumph
Orwell: Ignorance is Strength
FRAMED Collection
ROTASTIC
As Far as the Eye
Cepheus Protocol
Overruled
Ageless
Giana Sisters 2D
Prank Call
Hotshot Racing
Undead Horde
Streets of Fury EX
Rec Center Tycoon
JumpJet Rex
Hyper Knights
Vectronom
Levelhead
I am not a Monster: First Contact
Papo & Yo
Crookz the big heist
Iron Fisticle
Sniper: Ghost Warrior 2
Fun with Ragdolls: The Game
Reventure
Smoke and Sacrifice
American Fugitive
The Signal From Tölva
Medieval Kingdom Wars
Rebel Galaxy
XIII - Classic
Comedy Night
Darkness Within 2: The Dark Lineage
FLATLAND Vol.2
The Chess Variants Club
Armada 2526 Gold Edition
Toybox Turbos
Sudden Strike Gold
Airport Madness: World Edition
King's Bounty: Warriors of the North
Planet Alcatraz
NecroVisioN: Lost Company
Star Wolves
Konung 2
Men of War
A.I.M.2 Clan Wars
Parkan 2
El Matador
Ascension to the Throne
Peaky Blinders: Mastermind
The Flame in the Flood
When Ski Lifts Go Wrong
Bomber Crew
10 Second Ninja X
The Sacred Tears TRUE
Fred3ric
Lovecraft's Untold Stories
Path to Mnemosyne
CastleStorm
Crush Your Enemies
Semblance
S.W.I.N.E. HD Remaster
Radio Commander
Boneless Zombie
Robot Squad Simulator 2017
Pretty Girls Panic!
Poker Pretty Girls Battle: Texas Hold'em
VVVVVV
Warhammer Space wolf
Blazing Chrome
Car Mechanic Simulator 2015
Pang Adventures
Party Hard 2
REKT! High Octane Stunts
Thief of Thieves: Season One
Trailblazers
Warhammer: End Times - Vermintide
Demetrios - Deluxe Edition
Cobra Kai: The Karate Kid Saga Continues
GemCraft - Frostborn Wrath
Nickelodeon Kart Racers 2: Grand Prix
Rebel Galaxy Outlaw
Shadowhand: RPG Card Game
Survivalist: Invisible Strain
We Were Here Too
Blacksad: Under the Skin
Heroes of Hammerwatch
Leisure Suit Larry 1-7
Murder by Numbers
Redout: Enhanced Edition
Rise of Industry + 2130 DLC
Ziggurat
They Bleed Pixels
Sunblaze
Noosphere
Train Valley 1+2
Door Kickers: Action Squad
Vikings - Wolves of Midgard
Vambrace: Cold Soul
The Void
The Vagrant
Republique
Nephise: Ascension
Leisure Suit Larry - Wet Dreams Don't Dry
Knock-knock
Jewel Match Atlantis Solitaire - Collector's Edition
Healer's Quest
Fictorum
A Robot Named Fight!
Skautfold Chapters 1-4
Hero of the Kingdom: Trilogy
198X
Danger Scavenger
Doctor Who: The Lonely Assassins
Dread X Collection
Going Under
My Lovely Daughter
Rage in Peace
Flashback
Garfield Kart
Curse: The Eye of Isis
Amerzone: The Explorer’s Legacy
Black Moon Chronicles
Nostradamus: The Last Prophecy
Red Riding Hood - Star Crossed Lovers
Chicago 1930 : The Prohibition
Sinking Island
Haegemonia: Legions of Iron
Occultus - Mediterranean Cabal
Gevaudan
Windscape
Ultra Space Battle Brawl
Through the Woods
This is the Zodiac Speaking
The Uncertain: Light At The End
The Uncertain - The Last Quiet Day
Tales
Tales of the Neon Sea
Styx: Master of Shadows
She and the Light Bearer
Epistory - Typing Chronicles
A Wolf in Autumn
The Music Machine
Jalopy
Insane 2
Antigraviator
All-Star Fruit Racing
Constructor Plus
Ice Lakes
Knights of Pen & Paper 2
Victoria II
Kingdom Come: Deliverance – Band of Bastards
Kingdom Come: Deliverance – From the Ashes
Mindustry
| Games |
|---|
| Cube Runner |
| Slash It Ultimate |
| Slash It 2 |
| Slash It |
| Cybercube |
| Poly Island |
| Spin Rush |
| Upside Down |
| Neon Space |
| Hungry Flame |
| Charlie's Adventure |
| Neon Space 2 |
| Duke of Alpha Centauri |
| VR Games |
|---|
| House Flipper VR |
| Telefrag VR |
| Slinger VR |
2023.06.03 20:11 calvin324hk [H] 800+ games/DLCs/VR Games [W] Games/Paypal/TF2 Offers
https://www.reddit.com/IGSRep/comments/pikmri/calvin324hks_igs_rep_page/
https://www.reddit.com/sgsflaicomments/of2wzu/flair_profile_ucalvin324hk/
Region: NA (Canada)
Price are in USD. Fees on buyer.
CTRL + F to find your games in terms of name
Humble Keys <------ Click Here to see a full list of humble keys
Yakuza: Like a Dragon Legendary Hero Edition
Two Point Hospital
Castlevania: Lords of Shadow – Ultimate Edition
Trek to Yomi
Shadow Warrior 3
BATTLETECH MERCENARY COLLECTION
BATTLETECH Shadow Hawk Pack
Knights of Pen and Paper +1 Edition
Knights of Pen and Paper - Haunted Fall
KNIGHTS OF PEN AND PAPER 2 - DELUXIEST EDITION
Knights of Pen and Paper 2 - Here Be Dragons
Deathloop
Hell Let Loose
Hellblade: Senua's Sacrifice
F1 2019 Anniversary Edition
Valkryia Chronicles 4 Complete Edition
Mafia Definitive Edition
Mordhau
Back 4 Blood
Little Hope
Peaky Blinders: Mastermind
Visage
death stranding
Slay the Spire
Praey for the Gods
Degrees of Separation
Ghostrunner
Hellblade: Senua's Sacrifice
Control Ultimate Edition
Encore Duke Nukem: Manhattan Project
Hyper Light Drifter
Dirt 5
Ultimate Chicken Horse
Kentucky Route Zero - Season Pass Edition
Dreamfall Chapters
Wuppo
Human: Fall Flat
Northgard
The Witness
Borderlands: The Handsome Collection
MO:Astray
Metro Exodus
Pathfinder: Kingmaker - Enhanced Plus Edition
Super Mag Bot
Blade Assault
Where the Water Tastes Like Wine
TOEM
Backbone
GreedFall
Wasteland 3
GAS STATION SIMULATOR
IN SOUND MIND
MIND SCANNERS
EMILY IS AWAY <3
OMNO
ATOM RPG Trudograd
Banners of Ruin
Lawn Mowing Simulator
Legend of Keepers
Yes, Your Grace
Endzone - A World Apart
60 Parsecs
XCOM: ULTIMATE COLLECTION
PGA 2K21
Bioshock Collection
Warhammer: Vermintide 2 - Collector's Edition
JUST CAUSE 4: COMPLETE EDITION
Plague tale
Gas station simulator
Mind scanners
BATTLESTAR GALACTICA DEADLOCK SEASON ONE
Gamedec
Command & Conquer Remastered (Origin)
Surviving The Aftermath
Genesis Noir
Dirt Rally 2.0
Other Games
Another World – 20th Anniversary Edition
Chess Ultra
Godstrike
Home Sweet Home
Neighbours back From Hell
Pathologic 2
SAMUDRA
STRANGER
Songbird Symphony
The Invisible Hours
I am Bread
Hotshot Racing
Autonauts
Door Kickers: Action Squad
Iconoclasts
Patch Quest
Tunche
For The King
Abandon Ship
Book of Demons
PC Building Simulator
Pile Up! Box by Box
Snooker 19
Speed Limit
Totally Reliable Delivery Service
Youtubers Life
Dex
WRC 6 FIA World Rally Championship
V-Rally 4
PlateUp!
Turbo Golf Racing
Eternal Threads
The Last Campfire
Kingdom Two Crowns
Indivisible
White Day: A Labyrinth Named School
Field of Glory II
Warhammer 40,000: Gladius - Relics of War
Ice Age Scrat's Nutty Adventure
Soul Axiom Rebooted
A Little Golf Journey
Murder by Numbers
Chivalry: Medieval Warfare
Songbringer
STONE
Rescue Party: Live!
Rise of the Slime
Steel Rats™
Hue
Teacup
Perfect
Arcade Paradise - Arcade Paradise EP
Strange Brigade
Sifu Deluxe Edition Upgrade Bundle (EPIC)
AVICII Invector: Encore Edition
10 Second Ninja X
The Indie Mixtape
Diaries of a Spaceport Janitor
Epistory - Typing Chronicles
Heroes of Hammerwatch
Monster Slayers - Complete Edition
My Big Sister
Red Ronin
Heal
Cat Lady - The Card Game
Undungeon
Tangledeep
Styx: Shards of Darkness
Styx: Master of Shadows
Squids Odyssey
Pendula Swing - The Complete Journey
Mists of Noyah
King's Bounty: Crossworlds
Jotun: Valhalla Edition
Hero of the Kingdom: The Lost Tales 2
Hero of the Kingdom: The Lost Tales 1
Epistory - Typing Chronicles
Warhammer 40,000: Space Wolf Special Edition
Undead Horde
S.W.I.N.E. HD Remaster
Stirring Abyss
Scarlet Tower
Blood And Zombies
One More Island
Doorways: Prelude / Doorways: Holy Mountains of Flesh
Slain: Back from Hell
Lucius/Lucius 2/Lucius 3/Lucius Demake
Aragami
Deliver Us The Moon
Anuchard
Call of Juarez: Gunslinger
Darkwood
Intravenous
Unexplored 2: The Wayfarer's Legacy
Interstellar Space: Genesis
Survive the Nights
Blasphemous
Unto The End
NUTS
Cat Quest
Cosmic Star Heroine
Degrees of Separation
Pure Farming 2018
SEUM: Speedrunners from Hell
SUPER CHICKEN JUMPER
Syberia/Syberia II/Syberia 3
The Innsmouth Case
Tinytopia
Sniper ghost warrior contracts
Trine 4
Risen 3
Shadowgate
How to Survive
FORCED
Psychonauts
Warhammer 40,000: Space Wolf Special Edition
Sniper Elite 3 + Season Pass DLC
Sniper Ghost Warrior 3 - Season Pass Edition
METAL GEAR SOLID V: GROUND ZEROES
Strange Brigade Deluxe Edition
Call of Duty® Modern Warfare 3™
Sniper Elite 3
Sniper Elite 4 Deluxe Edition
Amnesia: Rebirth
PGA 2k21
Jurassic World Evolution
Darksiders Genesis
Endless Space® 2 - Digital Deluxe Edition
SID MEIER'S CIVILIZATION VI : PLATINUM EDITION
F1 2020
Titan Quest
Euro Truck Simulator 2
Witch It
BEAUTIFUL DESOLATION
CHANGE: A Homeless Survival Experience
Mighty Switch Force! Collection
Gone Home + Original Soundtrack
The WB Batman Collection
Batman: Arkham Asylum Game of the Year Edition
Batman: Arkham City - Game of the Year Edition
Beholder
Beholder 2
We Were Here Together
Kyle is Famous: Complete Edition
GRIP: Combat Racing *-GRIP: Combat Racing - Cygon Garage Kit *-GRIP: Combat Racing - Nyvoss Garage Kit *GRIP: Combat Racing - Terra Garage Kit *GRIP: Combat Racing - Vintek Garage Kit
Keep Talking and Nobody Explodes
Lead and Gold: Gangs of the Wild West
Miscreated
Second Extinction
Survive or Die
Breathedge
Dead in Vinland
Die Young
Empyrion - Galactic Survival
How to Survive 2
The Wild Eight
One Finger Death Punch 2
Power Rangers: Battle for the Grid
Slap City
Fahrenheit: Indigo Prophecy Remastered
Layers of Fear: Masterpiece Edition
Civilization: Beyond Earth – The Collection
Borderlands: The Handsome Collection
Primal Carnage: Extinction
Due Process
SimpleRockets 2
Killing Floor 2
For the King
For The King: Lost Civilization Adventure Pack
Pro Cycling Manager 2020
Tour de France 2020
Infectonator 3: Apocalypse
Warhammer: Chaosbane
Project Highrise
LAST OASIS
The Beast Inside
Terminus: Zombie Survivors
Crown Trick
Discolored
Everhood
Grand Mountain Adventure: Wonderlands
Nomad Survival
Sparklite
The Ramp
Valfaris
Dusk Diver
Neverinth
Tokyo Xanadu eX+
Zengeon
Spirit Hunter: Death Mark
Unmemory
Nigate Tale
Rogue Heroes: Ruins of Tasos
Liberated
Neversong
Nine Parchments
The Walking Dead
Secret Government
Monsters' Den: Godfall
Interplanetary: Enhanced Edition
Learn Japanese To Survive! Hiragana Battle
Learn Japanese To Survive! Kanji Combat
Learn Japanese To Survive! Katakana War
The Eternal Castle [REMASTERED]
THIS WAR OF MINE: COMPLETE EDITION
Cats in Time
Afterparty
Battlecruisers
Astronarch
Save Room - Organization Puzzle
PlataGO! Super Platform Game Maker
Nongunz: Doppelganger Edition
Warhammer vermintide collector's edition
Brothers: A Tale of Two Sons
Tank Mechanic Simulator
The Uncertain: Light At The End
INSOMNIA: The Ark
Darkside Detective
Shadow Tactics: Blades of the Shogun
GIGA WRECKER
Panty Party
Fell Seal: Arbiter's Mark
Tannenberg
Golf It!
Heroes of Hammerwatch
The Battle of Polytopia *DLC1. Cymanti Tribe *DLC2. ∑∫ỹriȱŋ Tribe *DLC3. Aquarion Tribe *DLC4. Polaris Tribe
Leisure Suit Larry - Wet Dreams Don't Dry
Lornsword Winter Chronicle
Oddworld: New 'n' Tasty
N++ (NPLUSPLUS)
Yooka-Laylee and the Impossible Lair
Virgo Versus The Zodiac
They Bleed Pixels
Maize
Smile For Me
The Haunted Island, a Frog Detective Game
Frog Detective 2: The Case of the Invisible Wizard
A Hole New World
Sumoman
Shape of the World
Evan's Remains
Ministry of Broadcast
She Sees Red - Interactive Movie
A Long Way Down
Depraved
Helheim Hassle
Neurodeck : Psychological Deckbuilder
Tropico 5 - Complete Collection
Escapists 2
Worms Rumble *Worms Rumble - New Challengers Pack *Worms Rumble - Legends Pack *Worms Rumble - Armageddon Weapon Skin Pack *Worms Rumble - Captain & Shark Double Pack
Achtung! Cthulhu Tactics
Turmoil
Narcos: Rise of the Cartels
Rogue Stormers
Torchlight
Fictorum
Ken Follett's The Pillars of the Earth
Moon Hunters
No Time to Relax
Overpass
Blood Bowl 2
SimCity 4 Deluxe Edition
Conarium
Brawlout
F1 RACE STARS Complete Edition Include DLC
Killing Room
Tenta Shooter / The 触シュー
Everreach: Project Eden
Railway Empire
Looterkings
Headsnatchers
Battlestar Galactica Deadlock
AIdol
Livelock
The Letter - Horror Visual Novel
F1 2018
Tacoma
Hard West - Collector's Edition
Hard West: Scars of Freedom DLC
Masquerada: Songs and Shadows
The Shrouded Isle
Joint Task Force
The World Next Door
Verdant Skies
DISTRAINT 2
Ittle Dew
Ittle Dew 2+
Oxenfree
Monstrum
Strikey Sisters
Do Not Feed the Monkeys
Cyber Ops
European Ship Simulator
Fishing Adventure
Internet Cafe Simulator
Zen Chess: Mate in One, Mate in 2 , Mate in 3 , Mate in 4 , Champion's Moves (5 games)
Transport INC
Shoppe Keep 2 - Business and Agriculture RPG Simulation
Desolate
GRIP: Combat Racing + DLC
OUTBUDDIES DX
Eidolon
Pizza Connection 3
Spartan Fist
River City Ransom: Underground
Saints Row: The Third
Koi-Koi Japan [Hanafuda playing cards] *Koi-Koi Japan : UKIYOE tours Vol.1 DLC *Koi-Koi Japan : UKIYOE tours Vol.2 DLC *Koi-Koi Japan : UKIYOE tours Vol.3 DLC
Mahjong Pretty Girls Battle
Mahjong Pretty Girls Battle : School Girls Edition
Pretty Girls Mahjong Solitaire
Princess Kaguya: Legend of the Moon Warrior
Delicious! Pretty Girls Mahjong Solitaire
Chaos Reborn
Driftland: The Magic Revival
Shadows: Awakening
Caveblazers
Fallback: Uprising
Mordheim: City of the Damned
WRC 7 FIA World Rally Championship
Mana Spark
Autonauts
Nusakana
Shift Happens
Crash Drive 3
Hot Tin Roof: The Cat That Wore A Fedora
Automachef
Demolish & Build 2017
Resort Boss: Golf
Out of Space
Narita Boy
Aven Colony
Alien Breed Trilogy
Tools up
Mount & Blade
Mount & Blade: With Fire & Sword
BLACKHOLE: Complete Edition
Detention
Downfall
Miasmata
Overclocked: A History of Violence
Silver Chains
White Night
The Cat Lady
Syberia 3
Textorcist
GARAGE bad trip
Guts and glory
Swag and Sorcery
Fort Triumph
Orwell: Ignorance is Strength
FRAMED Collection
ROTASTIC
As Far as the Eye
Cepheus Protocol
Overruled
Ageless
Giana Sisters 2D
Prank Call
Hotshot Racing
Undead Horde
Streets of Fury EX
Rec Center Tycoon
JumpJet Rex
Hyper Knights
Vectronom
Levelhead
I am not a Monster: First Contact
Papo & Yo
Crookz the big heist
Iron Fisticle
Sniper: Ghost Warrior 2
Fun with Ragdolls: The Game
Reventure
Smoke and Sacrifice
American Fugitive
The Signal From Tölva
Medieval Kingdom Wars
Rebel Galaxy
XIII - Classic
Comedy Night
Darkness Within 2: The Dark Lineage
FLATLAND Vol.2
The Chess Variants Club
Armada 2526 Gold Edition
Toybox Turbos
Sudden Strike Gold
Airport Madness: World Edition
King's Bounty: Warriors of the North
Planet Alcatraz
NecroVisioN: Lost Company
Star Wolves
Konung 2
Men of War
A.I.M.2 Clan Wars
Parkan 2
El Matador
Ascension to the Throne
Peaky Blinders: Mastermind
The Flame in the Flood
When Ski Lifts Go Wrong
Bomber Crew
10 Second Ninja X
The Sacred Tears TRUE
Fred3ric
Lovecraft's Untold Stories
Path to Mnemosyne
CastleStorm
Crush Your Enemies
Semblance
S.W.I.N.E. HD Remaster
Radio Commander
Boneless Zombie
Robot Squad Simulator 2017
Pretty Girls Panic!
Poker Pretty Girls Battle: Texas Hold'em
VVVVVV
Warhammer Space wolf
Blazing Chrome
Car Mechanic Simulator 2015
Pang Adventures
Party Hard 2
REKT! High Octane Stunts
Thief of Thieves: Season One
Trailblazers
Warhammer: End Times - Vermintide
Demetrios - Deluxe Edition
Cobra Kai: The Karate Kid Saga Continues
GemCraft - Frostborn Wrath
Nickelodeon Kart Racers 2: Grand Prix
Rebel Galaxy Outlaw
Shadowhand: RPG Card Game
Survivalist: Invisible Strain
We Were Here Too
Blacksad: Under the Skin
Heroes of Hammerwatch
Leisure Suit Larry 1-7
Murder by Numbers
Redout: Enhanced Edition
Rise of Industry + 2130 DLC
Ziggurat
They Bleed Pixels
Sunblaze
Noosphere
Train Valley 1+2
Door Kickers: Action Squad
Vikings - Wolves of Midgard
Vambrace: Cold Soul
The Void
The Vagrant
Republique
Nephise: Ascension
Leisure Suit Larry - Wet Dreams Don't Dry
Knock-knock
Jewel Match Atlantis Solitaire - Collector's Edition
Healer's Quest
Fictorum
A Robot Named Fight!
Skautfold Chapters 1-4
Hero of the Kingdom: Trilogy
198X
Danger Scavenger
Doctor Who: The Lonely Assassins
Dread X Collection
Going Under
My Lovely Daughter
Rage in Peace
Flashback
Garfield Kart
Curse: The Eye of Isis
Amerzone: The Explorer’s Legacy
Black Moon Chronicles
Nostradamus: The Last Prophecy
Red Riding Hood - Star Crossed Lovers
Chicago 1930 : The Prohibition
Sinking Island
Haegemonia: Legions of Iron
Occultus - Mediterranean Cabal
Gevaudan
Windscape
Ultra Space Battle Brawl
Through the Woods
This is the Zodiac Speaking
The Uncertain: Light At The End
The Uncertain - The Last Quiet Day
Tales
Tales of the Neon Sea
Styx: Master of Shadows
She and the Light Bearer
Epistory - Typing Chronicles
A Wolf in Autumn
The Music Machine
Jalopy
Insane 2
Clustertruck
Antigraviator
All-Star Fruit Racing
Constructor Plus
Ice Lakes
Knights of Pen & Paper 2
Victoria II
Kingdom Come: Deliverance – Band of Bastards
Kingdom Come: Deliverance – From the Ashes
Mindustry
Wishlist
submitted by calvin324hk to SteamGameSwap [link] [comments]
https://www.reddit.com/sgsflaicomments/of2wzu/flair_profile_ucalvin324hk/
Region: NA (Canada)
Price are in USD. Fees on buyer.
CTRL + F to find your games in terms of name
Humble Keys <------ Click Here to see a full list of humble keys
Two Point Hospital
Castlevania: Lords of Shadow – Ultimate Edition
Trek to Yomi
Shadow Warrior 3
BATTLETECH MERCENARY COLLECTION
BATTLETECH Shadow Hawk Pack
Knights of Pen and Paper +1 Edition
Knights of Pen and Paper - Haunted Fall
KNIGHTS OF PEN AND PAPER 2 - DELUXIEST EDITION
Knights of Pen and Paper 2 - Here Be Dragons
Deathloop
Hell Let Loose
Hellblade: Senua's Sacrifice
F1 2019 Anniversary Edition
Valkryia Chronicles 4 Complete Edition
Mafia Definitive Edition
Mordhau
Back 4 Blood
Little Hope
Peaky Blinders: Mastermind
Visage
death stranding
Slay the Spire
Praey for the Gods
Degrees of Separation
Ghostrunner
Hellblade: Senua's Sacrifice
Control Ultimate Edition
Encore Duke Nukem: Manhattan Project
Hyper Light Drifter
Dirt 5
Ultimate Chicken Horse
Kentucky Route Zero - Season Pass Edition
Dreamfall Chapters
Wuppo
Human: Fall Flat
Northgard
The Witness
Borderlands: The Handsome Collection
MO:Astray
Metro Exodus
Pathfinder: Kingmaker - Enhanced Plus Edition
Super Mag Bot
Blade Assault
Where the Water Tastes Like Wine
TOEM
Backbone
GreedFall
Wasteland 3
GAS STATION SIMULATOR
IN SOUND MIND
MIND SCANNERS
EMILY IS AWAY <3
OMNO
ATOM RPG Trudograd
Banners of Ruin
Lawn Mowing Simulator
Legend of Keepers
Yes, Your Grace
Endzone - A World Apart
60 Parsecs
XCOM: ULTIMATE COLLECTION
PGA 2K21
Bioshock Collection
Warhammer: Vermintide 2 - Collector's Edition
JUST CAUSE 4: COMPLETE EDITION
Plague tale
Gas station simulator
Mind scanners
BATTLESTAR GALACTICA DEADLOCK SEASON ONE
Gamedec
Command & Conquer Remastered (Origin)
Surviving The Aftermath
Genesis Noir
Dirt Rally 2.0
| Stand With Ukraine Charity Bundle |
|---|
| Gang Beasts |
| Tinkertown |
| Cloud Gardens |
| Blightbound |
| Stick Fight: The Game |
| Railway Empire |
| Mad Experiments: Escape Room |
| ibb & obb Double Pack |
| The Falconeer |
| Truberbrook |
| At Eve's Wake |
| Interrogation: You will be deceived |
| Hoplegs |
| Cannibal Cuisine |
| Necronator: Dead Wrong |
| Awesomenauts All Nauts pack |
| 1993 Space Machine |
| 8-bit Adventure Anthology: Volume I |
| ChromaGun |
| Baby Dino Adventures |
| Click and Slay |
| Swords and Soldiers 2 Shawarmageddon |
| Cosmonautica |
| Crash Drive 2 |
| Dimension Drive |
| The Way |
| Explosionade |
| Gelly Break Deluxe |
| Guppy |
| Journey For Elysium |
| Last Resort Island |
| Lumini |
| Marooners |
| Nelly Cootalot: Spoonbeaks Ahoy! HD |
| Pizza Connection 3 |
| Pressure Overdrive |
| Renowned Explorers: International Society |
| Tales of the Tiny Planet |
| TaniNani |
| THE CORRIDOR |
| AWAKE - Definitive Edition |
| Treasure Temples |
| Shu |
| Combat Tested |
| Unexplored |
| Rayon Riddles - Rise of the Goblin King |
| Circles |
| Killer Bundle 25 |
|---|
| From Space |
| Breathedge |
| Police Stories |
| DOOM 64 |
| Arise: A Simple Story |
| Patron |
| Baldur's Gate: Enhanced Edition |
| Baldur's Gate II: Enhanced Edition |
| Turok |
| Turok 2: Seeds of Evil |
| THE GAME OF LIFE 2 |
| CHANGE: A Homeless Survival Experience |
| DESOLATE |
| The Hong Kong Massacre |
| Death and Taxes |
| Lair of the Clockwork God |
| AMID EVIL |
| Just Die Already |
| I Am Fish |
| Golf Gang |
| Hypnospace Outlaw |
| Dark Deity |
| Warhammer 40,000: Mechanicus |
| DUSK |
| River City Girls |
Chess Ultra
Godstrike
Home Sweet Home
Neighbours back From Hell
Pathologic 2
SAMUDRA
STRANGER
Songbird Symphony
The Invisible Hours
I am Bread
Hotshot Racing
Autonauts
Door Kickers: Action Squad
Iconoclasts
Patch Quest
Tunche
For The King
Abandon Ship
Book of Demons
PC Building Simulator
Pile Up! Box by Box
Snooker 19
Speed Limit
Totally Reliable Delivery Service
Youtubers Life
Dex
WRC 6 FIA World Rally Championship
V-Rally 4
PlateUp!
Turbo Golf Racing
Eternal Threads
The Last Campfire
Kingdom Two Crowns
Indivisible
White Day: A Labyrinth Named School
Field of Glory II
Warhammer 40,000: Gladius - Relics of War
Ice Age Scrat's Nutty Adventure
Soul Axiom Rebooted
A Little Golf Journey
Murder by Numbers
Chivalry: Medieval Warfare
Songbringer
STONE
Rescue Party: Live!
Rise of the Slime
Steel Rats™
Hue
Teacup
Perfect
Arcade Paradise - Arcade Paradise EP
Strange Brigade
Sifu Deluxe Edition Upgrade Bundle (EPIC)
AVICII Invector: Encore Edition
10 Second Ninja X
The Indie Mixtape
Diaries of a Spaceport Janitor
Epistory - Typing Chronicles
Heroes of Hammerwatch
Monster Slayers - Complete Edition
My Big Sister
Red Ronin
Heal
Cat Lady - The Card Game
Undungeon
Tangledeep
Styx: Shards of Darkness
Styx: Master of Shadows
Squids Odyssey
Pendula Swing - The Complete Journey
Mists of Noyah
King's Bounty: Crossworlds
Jotun: Valhalla Edition
Hero of the Kingdom: The Lost Tales 2
Hero of the Kingdom: The Lost Tales 1
Epistory - Typing Chronicles
Warhammer 40,000: Space Wolf Special Edition
Undead Horde
S.W.I.N.E. HD Remaster
Stirring Abyss
Scarlet Tower
Blood And Zombies
One More Island
Doorways: Prelude / Doorways: Holy Mountains of Flesh
Slain: Back from Hell
Lucius/Lucius 2/Lucius 3/Lucius Demake
Aragami
Deliver Us The Moon
Anuchard
Call of Juarez: Gunslinger
Darkwood
Intravenous
Unexplored 2: The Wayfarer's Legacy
Interstellar Space: Genesis
Survive the Nights
Blasphemous
Unto The End
NUTS
Cat Quest
Cosmic Star Heroine
Degrees of Separation
Pure Farming 2018
SEUM: Speedrunners from Hell
SUPER CHICKEN JUMPER
Syberia/Syberia II/Syberia 3
The Innsmouth Case
Tinytopia
Sniper ghost warrior contracts
Trine 4
Risen 3
Shadowgate
How to Survive
FORCED
Psychonauts
Warhammer 40,000: Space Wolf Special Edition
Sniper Elite 3 + Season Pass DLC
Sniper Ghost Warrior 3 - Season Pass Edition
METAL GEAR SOLID V: GROUND ZEROES
Strange Brigade Deluxe Edition
Call of Duty® Modern Warfare 3™
Sniper Elite 3
Sniper Elite 4 Deluxe Edition
Amnesia: Rebirth
PGA 2k21
Jurassic World Evolution
Darksiders Genesis
Endless Space® 2 - Digital Deluxe Edition
SID MEIER'S CIVILIZATION VI : PLATINUM EDITION
F1 2020
Titan Quest
Euro Truck Simulator 2
Witch It
BEAUTIFUL DESOLATION
CHANGE: A Homeless Survival Experience
Mighty Switch Force! Collection
Gone Home + Original Soundtrack
The WB Batman Collection
Batman: Arkham Asylum Game of the Year Edition
Batman: Arkham City - Game of the Year Edition
Beholder
Beholder 2
We Were Here Together
Kyle is Famous: Complete Edition
GRIP: Combat Racing *-GRIP: Combat Racing - Cygon Garage Kit *-GRIP: Combat Racing - Nyvoss Garage Kit *GRIP: Combat Racing - Terra Garage Kit *GRIP: Combat Racing - Vintek Garage Kit
Keep Talking and Nobody Explodes
Lead and Gold: Gangs of the Wild West
Miscreated
Second Extinction
Survive or Die
Breathedge
Dead in Vinland
Die Young
Empyrion - Galactic Survival
How to Survive 2
The Wild Eight
One Finger Death Punch 2
Power Rangers: Battle for the Grid
Slap City
Fahrenheit: Indigo Prophecy Remastered
Layers of Fear: Masterpiece Edition
Civilization: Beyond Earth – The Collection
Borderlands: The Handsome Collection
Primal Carnage: Extinction
Due Process
SimpleRockets 2
Killing Floor 2
For the King
For The King: Lost Civilization Adventure Pack
Pro Cycling Manager 2020
Tour de France 2020
Infectonator 3: Apocalypse
Warhammer: Chaosbane
Project Highrise
LAST OASIS
The Beast Inside
Terminus: Zombie Survivors
Crown Trick
Discolored
Everhood
Grand Mountain Adventure: Wonderlands
Nomad Survival
Sparklite
The Ramp
Valfaris
Dusk Diver
Neverinth
Tokyo Xanadu eX+
Zengeon
Spirit Hunter: Death Mark
Unmemory
Nigate Tale
Rogue Heroes: Ruins of Tasos
Liberated
Neversong
Nine Parchments
The Walking Dead
Secret Government
Monsters' Den: Godfall
Interplanetary: Enhanced Edition
Learn Japanese To Survive! Hiragana Battle
Learn Japanese To Survive! Kanji Combat
Learn Japanese To Survive! Katakana War
The Eternal Castle [REMASTERED]
THIS WAR OF MINE: COMPLETE EDITION
Cats in Time
Afterparty
Battlecruisers
Astronarch
Save Room - Organization Puzzle
PlataGO! Super Platform Game Maker
Nongunz: Doppelganger Edition
Warhammer vermintide collector's edition
Brothers: A Tale of Two Sons
Tank Mechanic Simulator
The Uncertain: Light At The End
INSOMNIA: The Ark
Darkside Detective
Shadow Tactics: Blades of the Shogun
GIGA WRECKER
Panty Party
Fell Seal: Arbiter's Mark
Tannenberg
Golf It!
Heroes of Hammerwatch
The Battle of Polytopia *DLC1. Cymanti Tribe *DLC2. ∑∫ỹriȱŋ Tribe *DLC3. Aquarion Tribe *DLC4. Polaris Tribe
Leisure Suit Larry - Wet Dreams Don't Dry
Lornsword Winter Chronicle
Oddworld: New 'n' Tasty
N++ (NPLUSPLUS)
Yooka-Laylee and the Impossible Lair
Virgo Versus The Zodiac
They Bleed Pixels
Maize
Smile For Me
The Haunted Island, a Frog Detective Game
Frog Detective 2: The Case of the Invisible Wizard
A Hole New World
Sumoman
Shape of the World
Evan's Remains
Ministry of Broadcast
She Sees Red - Interactive Movie
A Long Way Down
Depraved
Helheim Hassle
Neurodeck : Psychological Deckbuilder
Tropico 5 - Complete Collection
Escapists 2
Worms Rumble *Worms Rumble - New Challengers Pack *Worms Rumble - Legends Pack *Worms Rumble - Armageddon Weapon Skin Pack *Worms Rumble - Captain & Shark Double Pack
Achtung! Cthulhu Tactics
Turmoil
Narcos: Rise of the Cartels
Rogue Stormers
Torchlight
Fictorum
Ken Follett's The Pillars of the Earth
Moon Hunters
No Time to Relax
Overpass
Blood Bowl 2
SimCity 4 Deluxe Edition
Conarium
Brawlout
F1 RACE STARS Complete Edition Include DLC
Killing Room
Tenta Shooter / The 触シュー
Everreach: Project Eden
Railway Empire
Looterkings
Headsnatchers
Battlestar Galactica Deadlock
AIdol
Livelock
The Letter - Horror Visual Novel
F1 2018
Tacoma
Hard West - Collector's Edition
Hard West: Scars of Freedom DLC
Masquerada: Songs and Shadows
The Shrouded Isle
Joint Task Force
The World Next Door
Verdant Skies
DISTRAINT 2
Ittle Dew
Ittle Dew 2+
Oxenfree
Monstrum
Strikey Sisters
Do Not Feed the Monkeys
Cyber Ops
European Ship Simulator
Fishing Adventure
Internet Cafe Simulator
Zen Chess: Mate in One, Mate in 2 , Mate in 3 , Mate in 4 , Champion's Moves (5 games)
Transport INC
Shoppe Keep 2 - Business and Agriculture RPG Simulation
Desolate
GRIP: Combat Racing + DLC
OUTBUDDIES DX
Eidolon
Pizza Connection 3
Spartan Fist
River City Ransom: Underground
Saints Row: The Third
Koi-Koi Japan [Hanafuda playing cards] *Koi-Koi Japan : UKIYOE tours Vol.1 DLC *Koi-Koi Japan : UKIYOE tours Vol.2 DLC *Koi-Koi Japan : UKIYOE tours Vol.3 DLC
Mahjong Pretty Girls Battle
Mahjong Pretty Girls Battle : School Girls Edition
Pretty Girls Mahjong Solitaire
Princess Kaguya: Legend of the Moon Warrior
Delicious! Pretty Girls Mahjong Solitaire
Chaos Reborn
Driftland: The Magic Revival
Shadows: Awakening
Caveblazers
Fallback: Uprising
Mordheim: City of the Damned
WRC 7 FIA World Rally Championship
Mana Spark
Autonauts
Nusakana
Shift Happens
Crash Drive 3
Hot Tin Roof: The Cat That Wore A Fedora
Automachef
Demolish & Build 2017
Resort Boss: Golf
Out of Space
Narita Boy
Aven Colony
Alien Breed Trilogy
Tools up
Mount & Blade
Mount & Blade: With Fire & Sword
BLACKHOLE: Complete Edition
Detention
Downfall
Miasmata
Overclocked: A History of Violence
Silver Chains
White Night
The Cat Lady
Syberia 3
Textorcist
GARAGE bad trip
Guts and glory
Swag and Sorcery
Fort Triumph
Orwell: Ignorance is Strength
FRAMED Collection
ROTASTIC
As Far as the Eye
Cepheus Protocol
Overruled
Ageless
Giana Sisters 2D
Prank Call
Hotshot Racing
Undead Horde
Streets of Fury EX
Rec Center Tycoon
JumpJet Rex
Hyper Knights
Vectronom
Levelhead
I am not a Monster: First Contact
Papo & Yo
Crookz the big heist
Iron Fisticle
Sniper: Ghost Warrior 2
Fun with Ragdolls: The Game
Reventure
Smoke and Sacrifice
American Fugitive
The Signal From Tölva
Medieval Kingdom Wars
Rebel Galaxy
XIII - Classic
Comedy Night
Darkness Within 2: The Dark Lineage
FLATLAND Vol.2
The Chess Variants Club
Armada 2526 Gold Edition
Toybox Turbos
Sudden Strike Gold
Airport Madness: World Edition
King's Bounty: Warriors of the North
Planet Alcatraz
NecroVisioN: Lost Company
Star Wolves
Konung 2
Men of War
A.I.M.2 Clan Wars
Parkan 2
El Matador
Ascension to the Throne
Peaky Blinders: Mastermind
The Flame in the Flood
When Ski Lifts Go Wrong
Bomber Crew
10 Second Ninja X
The Sacred Tears TRUE
Fred3ric
Lovecraft's Untold Stories
Path to Mnemosyne
CastleStorm
Crush Your Enemies
Semblance
S.W.I.N.E. HD Remaster
Radio Commander
Boneless Zombie
Robot Squad Simulator 2017
Pretty Girls Panic!
Poker Pretty Girls Battle: Texas Hold'em
VVVVVV
Warhammer Space wolf
Blazing Chrome
Car Mechanic Simulator 2015
Pang Adventures
Party Hard 2
REKT! High Octane Stunts
Thief of Thieves: Season One
Trailblazers
Warhammer: End Times - Vermintide
Demetrios - Deluxe Edition
Cobra Kai: The Karate Kid Saga Continues
GemCraft - Frostborn Wrath
Nickelodeon Kart Racers 2: Grand Prix
Rebel Galaxy Outlaw
Shadowhand: RPG Card Game
Survivalist: Invisible Strain
We Were Here Too
Blacksad: Under the Skin
Heroes of Hammerwatch
Leisure Suit Larry 1-7
Murder by Numbers
Redout: Enhanced Edition
Rise of Industry + 2130 DLC
Ziggurat
They Bleed Pixels
Sunblaze
Noosphere
Train Valley 1+2
Door Kickers: Action Squad
Vikings - Wolves of Midgard
Vambrace: Cold Soul
The Void
The Vagrant
Republique
Nephise: Ascension
Leisure Suit Larry - Wet Dreams Don't Dry
Knock-knock
Jewel Match Atlantis Solitaire - Collector's Edition
Healer's Quest
Fictorum
A Robot Named Fight!
Skautfold Chapters 1-4
Hero of the Kingdom: Trilogy
198X
Danger Scavenger
Doctor Who: The Lonely Assassins
Dread X Collection
Going Under
My Lovely Daughter
Rage in Peace
Flashback
Garfield Kart
Curse: The Eye of Isis
Amerzone: The Explorer’s Legacy
Black Moon Chronicles
Nostradamus: The Last Prophecy
Red Riding Hood - Star Crossed Lovers
Chicago 1930 : The Prohibition
Sinking Island
Haegemonia: Legions of Iron
Occultus - Mediterranean Cabal
Gevaudan
Windscape
Ultra Space Battle Brawl
Through the Woods
This is the Zodiac Speaking
The Uncertain: Light At The End
The Uncertain - The Last Quiet Day
Tales
Tales of the Neon Sea
Styx: Master of Shadows
She and the Light Bearer
Epistory - Typing Chronicles
A Wolf in Autumn
The Music Machine
Jalopy
Insane 2
Clustertruck
Antigraviator
All-Star Fruit Racing
Constructor Plus
Ice Lakes
Knights of Pen & Paper 2
Victoria II
Kingdom Come: Deliverance – Band of Bastards
Kingdom Come: Deliverance – From the Ashes
Mindustry
| Games |
|---|
| Cube Runner |
| Slash It Ultimate |
| Slash It 2 |
| Slash It |
| Cybercube |
| Poly Island |
| Spin Rush |
| Upside Down |
| Neon Space |
| Hungry Flame |
| Charlie's Adventure |
| Neon Space 2 |
| Duke of Alpha Centauri |
| VR Games |
|---|
| House Flipper VR |
| Telefrag VR |
| Slinger VR |
2023.06.03 20:04 Aware_Machine_9838 (Selling) List of 4K and HD movies, TV Shows, Marvel, Disney
13 Hours VUDU $5 (split) 3 From Hell (Unrated) MA 4K $10 300 Rise of an Empire MA HD $5 31 VUDU HD $7 42 The Jackie Robinson Story MA $6 47 Ronin VUDU $5, iTunes 4K $6 (MA) (split) A Quiet Place VUDU 4K $9, VUDU HD $6, iTunes 4K $6 (split) A Quiet Place Part 2 VUDU 4K $10 Action Point VUDU $3, iTunes 4K $4 (split) Alfred Hitchcock collection MA 4K $30 (Rear Window, Vertigo, Psycho, The Birds) Alien MA 4K $9 All the Money in the World MA $6.50 Allied VUDU 4K $10, iTunes 4K $7 (split) Almost Famous VUDU 4K $10 American Gangster MA 4K $11 American Hustle MA $5 American Made MA 4K $10 American Psycho VUDU 4K $10 American Reunion MA $5 (split) American Sniper MA $5 Amira (drafthouse) $2 Anatomy of a Murder MA 4K $10 Animal House MA 4K $10 Anna MA 4K $10 Annabelle MA $6 Annihilation VUDU 4K $8, VUDU HD $5, iTunes 4K $5 (split) Antebellum VUDU 4K $10 Apocalypse Now VUDU 4K $10 Apollo 13 MA 4K $10 Argo MA $5 Arrival VUDU 4K $8, VUDU HD $4, iTunes 4K $5 (split) Atomic Blonde VUDU 4K $7, VUDU HD $4, iTunes 4K $6 (MA) (split) Back to the Future Trilogy MA 4K $20, MA HD $15 Bad Grandpa VUDU $5 (split) Battleship MA 4K $10 The Beguiled MA $5 (split) Benji (moviespree) $2 Beverly Hills Cop MA 4K $10 The Big Lebowsky VUDU 4K $10 The Birds MA 4K $9 Birds of Prey MA 4K $10 Blade MA 4K $11 Blood Father VUDU $5 Bloodshot MA 4K $10 The Blues Brothers MA 4K $10 Book Club VUDU $4, iTunes 4K $5 (split) Boss Baby MA $5 The Boss (Unrated) iTunes $4 Bourne Identity VUDU 4K $8 (split) Bourne Supremacy VUDU HD $4 (split) Bourne Legacy VUDU 4K $8, iTunes 4K $6 (MA) (split) Jason Bourne VUDU 4K $8 Braveheart VUDU 4K $10 The Breakfast Club MA $6 Bumblebee VUDU 4K $8, iTunes 4K $6 (split) The Bye Bye Man iTunes $5 Cabin in the Woods MA 4K $10, VUDU HD/iTunes 4K $6 The Campaign MA $5 Captain Fantastic MA $5 Casino MA 4K $10 Clint Eastwood a Cinematic Legacy MA HD $6 Cloverfield VUDU 4K $10 Clueless VUDU $7 Cold Pursuit VUDU 4K $10 The Commuter VUDU 4K $10 The Conjuring: The Devil Made Me Do It MA $8 Crawl VUDU $5, iTunes 4K $5 (split) The Curse of La Lorona MA $5 Daddy's Home VUDU 4K $8, iTunes 4K $7 (MA) (split) Daddy's Home 2 VUDU 4K $8, iTunes 4K $7 (MA) (split) Dallas Buyers Club VUDU $6, iTunes $6 (split) The Dark Knight Rises MA HD $5 Darkest Hour MA 4K $10 Days of Thunder VUDU 4K $10 Deadpool MA 4K $10 Deadpool 2 MA 4K $10 Deepwater Horizon VUDU 4K $8, iTunes 4K $7 (split) Den of Thieves iTunes $5 Despicable Me 2 VUDU $5, iTunes 4K $7 (MA) (split) Despicable Me 3 VUDU 4K $9, VUDU HD $5 (MA) (split) Dirty Grandpa MA 4K $10 Do the Right Thing MA 4K $10 Dom Hemingway MA $5 Dr. Strangelove MA 4K $10 Dreamworks 10 movie bundle MA $30 (Shrek, Spirit: Stallion of the Cimarron, Madagascar, Kung Fu Panda, How to Train Your Dragon, The Croods, Home, Trolls, The Boss Baby, Abominable) Dredd VUDU 4K $10, iTunes 4K $5 (split) Dunkirk MA HD $6 E.T. iTunes 4K $7 (MA) (split) Elysium VUDU 4K $10 Ender's Game VUDU 4K $8, iTunes 4K $5 (split) Evil Dead 1 4K $8 Evil Dead 2 4K $8 (together $14) Ex Machina VUDU 4K $9, VUDU HD $5 The Expendables 3 (theatrical) VUDU $4, iTunes 4K $5 (split) The Expendables 3 (unrated) VUDU $4, iTunes 4K $5 (split) Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close MA $5 The Fast and the Furious MA 4K $8 The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift MA 4K $8 Fast Five MA HD $5 The Fate of the Furious MA HD $3 Fences MA $5 Field of Dreams MA 4K $10 Fifty Shades of Grey VUDU 4K $8, iTunes 4K $6 (MA) (split) Fifty Shades Darker iTunes 4K $6 (MA) (split) Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within MA 4K $10 First Man MA 4K $10 Fist Fight MA $5 Focus MA $5 Forrest Gump MA 4K $10 Friday the 13th 8 movie pack VUDU $35 Full Metal Jacket MA 4K $10 Fury MA $5 Gandhi MA 4K $10 Gangster Squad MA $5 The Gentlemen iTunes 4K $8.50 Gemini Man VUDU 4K $9, iTunes 4K $6 (split) Get Out VUDU 4K $8, iTunes 4K $5 (MA) (split) Ghostbusters: Answer the Call MA 4K $10 Ghost in the Shell (1995 - anime) VUDU 4K $8 Ghost in the Shell (2017 - movie) VUDU 4K $10 GI Joe Retaliation VUDU 4K $10 Girls Trip VUDU $5, iTunes $5 (MA) (split) Godzilla MA 4K $10, MA HD $5 Godzilla vs Kong MA 4K $10 Going in Style MA $5 Gold VUDU $6, iTunes $6 (split) Good Boys MA $7 Goonies MA 4K $10 Gone With the Wind MA $7 The Greatest Show On Earth MA $8 The Greatest Showman MA $6 The Great Wall VUDU 4K $8, iTunes 4K $5 (split) The Green Knight VUDU 4K $10 Green Lantern + Green Lantern: Emerald Knights MA $9 The Grey VUDU $5, iTunes $5 (split) Grudge Match MA $5 Hacksaw Ridge VUDU 4K $10 Hail, Caesar! MA $5, iTunes $5 (split) The Hangover Part II MA $5 Harold and Maude VUDU $8 Harriet MA $7 The Hateful Eight VUDU/GP $6 The Heat MA $5 Hell Fest (2018) VUDU $5 Hell or High Water VUDU 4K $10 Hidden Figures iTunes 4K (MA) $8 Hitman's Bodyguard VUDU 4K $10 The Hobbit - An Unexpected Journey MA $5 Home Alone MA 4K $8 Hop VUDU $6, iTunes $6 (MA) (split) Hope Springs MA HD $5 Horrible Bosses MA $5 Hostiles VUDU 4K $10 The House MA $5 How to Train Your Dragon 2 MA $4 Hugo VUDU $5, iTunes $5 (split) The Hunger Games VUDU 4K $6, iTunes 4K $3 (split) The Hunt For Red October VUDU 4K $10, iTunes 4K $6 (split) The Huntsman: Winter’s War MA 4K $10 I Feel Pretty iTunes $5 Ice Age MA $4 Independence Day MA 4K $8 Inglourious Basterds MA 4K $10 Instant Family VUDU $5, iTunes 4K $5 (split) Interstellar VUDU 4K $11 Invisible Man (2020) MA $6 It's A Wonderful Life VUDU 4K $9, iTunes 4K $6 (split) Jack Reacher Never Go Back VUDU $5 (split) Jack Ryan VUDU $5, iTunes 4K $5 (split) James Bond - Daniel Craig 4 movie collection VUDU 4K $25 (Casino Royale, Quantum of Solace, Skyfall, Spectre) James Bond - Spectre VUDU 4K $10 James Bond - Skyfall VUDU 4K $10 Jaws MA 4K $10, MA HD $5 Jerry Maguire MA 4K $10 Jigsaw VUDU 4K $10, VUDU HD $7 John Wick VUDU 4K $9, VUDU HD $5, iTunes 4K $5 (split) John Wick 2 VUDU HD $5, iTunes 4K $5 (split) John Wick 3 VUDU 4K $9, VUDU HD/iTunes 4K $7 Journey 2 SD $2 Juice VUDU 4K $10 Jupiter Ascending MA $5 Jurassic Park VUDU $5 (split) Jurassic Park III VUDU $5 (split) Justice League MA $5 The Karate Kid (1984) MA 4K $10 Kidnap VUDU $5, iTunes $5 (split) King Kong (2005) VUDU 4K $10, VUDU HD $5, iTunes 4K $7 (MA) (split) Kingsman: Golden Circle MA 4K $7 Knights of Sidonia - Love Woven in the Stars (funimation) $8 La La Land VUDU 4K $8, iTunes 4K $5 (split) Lara Croft: Tomb Raider (2001) iTunes 4K $7 (split) Last Action Hero MA 4K $10 The Last Stand VUDU $5 Lawrence of Arabia MA 4K $10 The LEGO Movie MA 4K $8 Leprechaun 1-7 VUDU $15 Live by Night MA $5 Little Monsters $6.50 Logan 4K $8 Logan Lucky VUDU 4K $8 Lone Survivor VUDU 4K $8, iTunes 4K $7 (MA) The Longest Ride 4K $7 The Lorax iTunes $5 (MA) (split) Love & Monsters VUDU 4K $10 The Lucky One MA $5 Lucy MA 4K $10 Mad Max Fury Road MA 4K $9, MA HD $5 Mad Max: The Road Warrior MA 4K $10 Magic Mike MA $4 Maggie VUDU $5 Mama (2013) iTunes $5 Mamma Mia! MA 4K $10 Man of Steel MA $5 Men in Black III MA $5 Midway MA 4K $10 Mile 22 iTunes 4K $7 Minions VUDU HD $5 Mission Impossible 1-6 VUDU 4K $45 Mission Impossible: Rogue Nation VUDU HD $5, iTunes 4K $5 (split) Mission Impossible: Fallout VUDU HD $3, iTunes 4K $3 (split) Mood (drafthouse) $2 Monster Hunter MA 4K $10 Mortal Kombat VUDU 4K $12 Mother! VUDU 4K $5, iTunes 4K $4 (split) Mr. Smith Goes to Washington MA 4K $10 The Mummy 1-3 MA 4K $18 (split) The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor iTunes 4K $6 (MA) (split) Murder on the Orient Express MA $6 Nebraska VUDU $5, iTunes $5 (split) Neighbors VUDU $5, iTunes $5 (MA) (split) News of the World MA 4K $10 Noah VUDU $5, iTunes $5 (MA) (split) Oblivion VUDU 4K $10, iTunes 4K $7 (MA) (split) Office Christmas Party VUDU $5, iTunes 4K $5 (split) Oliver! 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2023.06.03 18:01 suedney Post Match Thread: Manchester City 2-1 Manchester United English FA Cup
FT: Manchester City 2-1 Manchester United
Manchester City scorers: Ilkay Gündogan (1', 51')Manchester United scorers: Bruno Fernandes (33' PEN)
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Manchester City
Stefan Ortega, Rúben Dias, Manuel Akanji, Kyle Walker (Aymeric Laporte), Rodri, John Stones, Jack Grealish (Nathan Aké), Bernardo Silva, Erling Haaland, Ilkay Gündogan, Kevin De Bruyne (Phil Foden).
Subs: Cole Palmer, Riyad Mahrez, Rico Lewis, Julián Álvarez, Ederson, Kalvin Phillips.
____________________________
Manchester United
David de Gea, Victor Lindelöf (Scott McTominay), Raphaël Varane, Luke Shaw, Aaron Wan-Bissaka, Christian Eriksen (Alejandro Garnacho), Fred, Casemiro, Marcus Rashford, Jadon Sancho (Wout Weghorst), Bruno Fernandes.
Subs: Facundo Pellistri, Jack Butland, Tyrell Malacia, Diogo Dalot, Anthony Elanga, Harry Maguire.
1' Goal! Manchester City 1, Manchester United 0. Ilkay Gündogan (Manchester City) right footed shot from outside the box to the top right corner. Assisted by Kevin De Bruyne.
33' Goal! Manchester City 1, Manchester United 1. Bruno Fernandes (Manchester United) converts the penalty with a right footed shot to the bottom left corner.
45'+4' Aaron Wan-Bissaka (Manchester United) is shown the yellow card for a bad foul.
51' Goal! Manchester City 2, Manchester United 1. Ilkay Gündogan (Manchester City) left footed shot from outside the box to the bottom left corner. Assisted by Kevin De Bruyne following a set piece situation.
62' Substitution, Manchester United. Alejandro Garnacho replaces Christian Eriksen.
76' Substitution, Manchester City. Phil Foden replaces Kevin De Bruyne.
78' Substitution, Manchester United. Wout Weghorst replaces Jadon Sancho.
79' Fred (Manchester United) is shown the yellow card for a bad foul.
81' Stefan Ortega (Manchester City) is shown the yellow card.
83' Substitution, Manchester United. Scott McTominay replaces Victor Lindelöf.
89' Substitution, Manchester City. Nathan Aké replaces Jack Grealish.
90' Rodri (Manchester City) is shown the yellow card for hand ball.
90'+5' Substitution, Manchester City. Aymeric Laporte replaces Kyle Walker because of an injury.
2023.06.03 18:01 mcfcbot [Post Match Thread] Manchester City 2 - 1 Manchester United (FA Cup)
Match Finished
FA Cup FinalManchester City 2 - 1 Manchester United
Manchester City has won
Kicked Off: 15:00| Manchester City | Time | Manchester United |
|---|---|---|
| GOAL (I. Gundogan, K. De Bruyne assist) | 1 | |
| 33 | GOAL (B. Fernandes PEN) | |
| 45+4 | YELLOW CARD (A. Wan-Bissaka) | |
| GOAL (I. Gundogan, K. De Bruyne assist) | 51 | |
| 62 | SUB (C. Eriksen OFF, A. Garnacho ON) | |
| SUB (K. De Bruyne OFF, P. Foden ON) | 76 | |
| 78 | SUB (J. Sancho OFF, W. Weghorst ON) | |
| 79 | YELLOW CARD (Fred) | |
| YELLOW CARD (S. Ortega) | 81 | |
| 83 | SUB (V. Lindelof OFF, S. McTominay ON) | |
| SUB (J. Grealish OFF, N. Ake ON) | 89 | |
| YELLOW CARD (Rodri) | 90 | |
| SUB (K. Walker OFF, A. Laporte ON) | 90+5 |
| Manchester City | Manchester United | |
|---|---|---|
| 5 | Shots on Goal | 3 |
| 6 | Shots off Goal | 4 |
| 11 | Total Shots | 13 |
| None | Blocked Shots | 6 |
| 5 | Shots insidebox | 9 |
| 6 | Shots outsidebox | 4 |
| 12 | Fouls | 11 |
| 2 | Corner Kicks | 3 |
| 1 | Offsides | 3 |
| 60% | Ball Possession | 40% |
| 2 | Yellow Cards | 2 |
| None | Red Cards | None |
| 1 | Goalkeeper Saves | 3 |
| 512 | Total passes | 336 |
| 447 | Passes accurate | 265 |
| 87% | Passes % | 79% |
| None | expected_goals | None |
Manchester City
| player | mins | rating | goals | assists | shots (on) | passes | key passes | tackles | blocks & interceptions | duels (won) | dribbles (success) | fouled | fouls | offsides | saves |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Stefan Ortega | 94 | 6.3 | - | - | - (-) | 42 | - | - | -/- | - (-) | - (-) | - | - | - | 1 |
| Kyle Walker | 94 | 6.6 | - | - | - (-) | 62 | - | 2 | -/1 | 5 (3) | - (-) | 1 | 1 | - | - |
| Rúben Dias | 94 | 7 | - | - | - (-) | 81 | - | 2 | -/- | 4 (3) | - (-) | - | - | - | - |
| Manuel Akanji | 94 | 6.7 | - | - | - (-) | 55 | - | - | -/- | 4 (2) | 1 (-) | - | 1 | - | - |
| John Stones | 94 | 7.2 | - | - | 1 (-) | 41 | - | 2 | 2/- | 4 (4) | - (-) | 1 | - | - | - |
| Rodri | 94 | 7.6 | - | - | 1 (-) | 70 | 3 | 5 | 1/1 | 14 (7) | 3 (1) | - | 2 | - | - |
| Bernardo Silva | 94 | 7 | - | - | 1 (-) | 44 | 1 | 2 | -/1 | 10 (4) | 1 (1) | - | 2 | - | - |
| Kevin De Bruyne | 76 | 7.9 | - | 2 | 2 (1) | 29 | 3 | 1 | -/- | 10 (5) | 2 (2) | 2 | 1 | - | - |
| İlkay Gündoğan (C) | 94 | 8.6 | 2 | - | 2 (2) | 46 | 2 | 1 | 1/- | 5 (2) | - (-) | - | - | 1 | - |
| Jack Grealish | 89 | 6.9 | - | - | 1 (-) | 21 | 1 | 2 | 1/- | 13 (8) | 2 (1) | 3 | 4 | - | - |
| Erling Haaland | 94 | 6.6 | - | - | 3 (2) | 15 | - | 1 | 1/- | 12 (6) | - (-) | 2 | - | - | - |
| Phil Foden (SUB) | 18 | 6.7 | - | - | - (-) | 6 | - | 1 | -/- | 3 (2) | - (-) | 1 | 1 | - | - |
| Nathan Aké (SUB) | 5 | - | - | - | - (-) | - | - | - | -/- | - (-) | - (-) | - | - | - | - |
| player | mins | rating | goals | assists | shots (on) | passes | key passes | tackles | blocks & interceptions | duels (won) | dribbles (success) | fouled | fouls | offsides | saves |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| David De Gea | 94 | 6.2 | - | - | - (-) | 35 | - | - | -/- | - (-) | - (-) | - | - | - | 3 |
| Aaron Wan-Bissaka | 94 | 6 | - | - | - (-) | 27 | - | - | -/2 | 8 (2) | 1 (1) | 1 | 1 | - | - |
| Raphaël Varane | 94 | 6.6 | - | - | 2 (1) | 31 | - | 1 | -/- | 4 (3) | - (-) | 1 | 1 | - | - |
| Victor Lindelöf | 83 | 6.3 | - | - | - (-) | 40 | - | - | -/- | 5 (4) | - (-) | - | - | - | - |
| Luke Shaw | 94 | 6.7 | - | - | - (-) | 31 | - | 1 | -/- | 8 (7) | 2 (2) | 2 | - | - | - |
| Casemiro | 94 | 6.9 | - | - | - (-) | 32 | 2 | 2 | -/1 | 9 (5) | 1 (1) | 1 | 1 | - | - |
| Fred | 94 | 6.2 | - | - | - (-) | 26 | 1 | 2 | -/5 | 15 (3) | 1 (-) | 1 | 6 | - | - |
| Bruno Fernandes (C) | 94 | 7.2 | 1 | - | 1 (1) | 40 | 3 | 4 | -/- | 11 (5) | - (-) | 1 | 1 | - | - |
| Christian Eriksen | 62 | 6.5 | - | - | - (-) | 17 | 1 | - | -/- | 3 (1) | - (-) | - | - | - | - |
| Jadon Sancho | 78 | 6.3 | - | - | - (-) | 22 | - | 1 | -/- | 5 (2) | 2 (-) | 1 | - | 2 | - |
| Marcus Rashford | 94 | 6.5 | - | - | 2 (-) | 21 | - | - | -/- | 9 (2) | 3 (1) | 1 | 1 | - | - |
| Alejandro Garnacho (SUB) | 32 | 6.7 | - | - | 1 (-) | 7 | - | - | -/- | 4 (2) | 2 (1) | 1 | - | - | - |
| Wout Weghorst (SUB) | 16 | 6.7 | - | - | - (-) | 3 | 1 | - | -/- | 2 (1) | - (-) | - | - | 1 | - |
| Scott McTominay (SUB) | 11 | 6.9 | - | - | 1 (1) | 4 | 1 | - | -/- | - (-) | - (-) | - | - | - | - |
| Paul Tierney | 94 | 6.3 | - | 1 | - | - | - | - | -/- | - (-) | - (-) | - | - | - | - |
| Opposition | League | Round | Date (UK Time) | |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| H | Inter | UEFA Champions League | Final | 20:00 10 Jun 23 |
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Jenner Kym Graham Kyra Santoro Lacey Laid Laci Kay Somers Lady Sonia Lala Anthony Lana Rhoades Lana Rose LaSirena Laura Earnesty Lauren Alexis Lauren Elizabeth Lauren Summer Layna Boo Lazaniaze Lazano Lazelle Lazybutthead Leah Goes Wilde Leana Lovings Leichtperlig Lela Sohna Lena Paul Lena The Plug Lenina Crowne LeoLulu Lexi Luna Lil Pump Lilded Janet Lilianaheartsss Lilith Cavalier Lindsey Pelas Linneas Linny Hill Lisa Ann Little Angel Little Caprice LittlmissFit Liz Cambage Lizbeth Rodriguez Lizzy Wurst Loren Gray Louisa Khovanski LoveLilah Lucia Manfredi Ludmii Alderete Luma Skye Luna Alessandra Luna Star LupuWellness Luxury Girl Lydia Grace LylasBigHeart Lyna Perez Lyna Perez MaareBeaar Mackenzie Ziegler Mackz Jones Madelene Wright Madison Ginley Madison Ivy Madison Moore Malu Trevejo Mamibree Mandy Rose Mandy Rose Maria Arreghini Maria Eduarda Maria Eugenia Maria Gjieli Maria Nagai Mariah Mallad Mariana Cruz Martina Finocchio Martina Vismara Maru Karv Mary Moody Mataya Sweeting Mathild Tantot Mati Marroni Mckinzie Valdez Me1adinha Meana Wolf Meeti Kalher Meg Turney Megan McCarthy Megnut Mela Moria MelimTX Melissa Debbling Melody Rabbit Mia Azul Mia Francis Mia Khalifa Mia Malkova Michelle Rabbit Michelle Zepeda Mikaela Fuente Mikaela Pascal Mikaela Testa Mikahhlynn Mikaila Murphy Mikaylah Milan Mirabella Milf And Daughter Millie Bobby Brown Mimsy Bun Mimsy Heart Mini Loona MissBnasty MissCindyTran MizzTwerksum Molly Eskam Morgan Vera Moriah Mills Ms Fiire Ms Sethi MsPuiyi Mulan Vuitton Murka Valentin Nacre Victoire NakarySp Nala Fitness Naomi Soraya Naomi Swann Nara Ford NataLee Natali Polyakova Natalia Fadeev Natalie Coppes Natalie Reynolds Natalie Roush Natasha Aughey Natasha Nice Neiva Mara Neringa Kriziute NickiiBaby Nicola Cavanis Nicole Aniston Nicoletta Shea Nikki Woods Niykee Heaton Noelle Leyva NoemieLili NonaKanal Noonz_Supattra Nurababy Nursh Nyukixthequeen Octokuro Olivia Casta Only Jayus Paige Nieman Paige VanZant Paloma Silva Pamibaby Pandora Blue Pandora Kaaki Pandoranyxie Paola Skye Payton Preslee PeachJars Penelope Kay Phoenix Marie Piabunny Pinuppixie Pokimane Polina Malinovskaya Poonam Pandey Povlotti Princesa_Ari Princess Helayna Ptwithally Purple Bitch Rachel Cook Rachel Dolezal Rae Lil Black Rakhi Gill Ramona_Jst Rebecca Crocker Reislin Rena Tari Reya Sunshine Rharrirhound Rihanna Riley Reid Riley Reid Rosa Acosta Roxystylez Rubi Rose Ruby Salvo Rusty Fawkes Sabrina Nichole Sahlt Sailormoon Samantha Aufderheide Samie Duchamp Sara Gold Sara Mascara Sara Retali Sara Underwood Sarah Banks Sarrixo Sava Schultz Savannah Bond Scarlett Jones Scarlett Kisses Scarlit Scandal Sejinming Selena Gomez Seltin Sweety Serinide Shady Shainarae Shaiden Rogue Shamayneg ShiftyMine ShunliMei Sincerely Juju Sky Bri Skye Sutton Skylar Rae Skylar Vox SkylarMaexo Skyler Lo Smashedely SnackyChan Sofia Ansari Sofia Elizabeth Sofia Gomez Sofia Simens SolaZola Solomia Maievska Sommer Ray Songyuxin Hitomi Sophie Dee Sophie Mudd Sophie Mudd Sophie Rose Sophie Vanmeter Stacey Saran Stacia Maria Steffy Moreno Stella Brooks Stella Violet Steph Kegels Stormi Maya STPeach StrawberryShan Summer Hart Sunny Leone Sunny Ray SusyGala Svenska Tjejer Svetabily SydneyVmay SyrianQueen - AMBS Taliya Jordan Tamzintaber Tana Mongeau Taneth Gimenez Tara Babcock Tasyamini Tayler Hills Taylor White Teanna Trump Tessa Winters Thaissa Fit TheConnellTwins TheDanDanglerr TheRealBrittFit Thumbalina Tiiieeen Toni Camille Toochi Kaash Trisha Paytas TroyaChan Turkish Amateur Teens Tyga UhhLiar Uhvenyu Ur4vity Urbzz Urindianbae Utah Jaz Valentina Garzon Valentina Nappi Valeria Alejandrav Valerie Kay Valkyrae Vanessa Bohorquez Vera Dijmans Veronica Perasso Vicky Stark Victoria Barret Victoryaxo Viet Bunny Viking Barbie Vina Sky Violet Myers Violet Summers Vita Celestine Vivi Tarantino Vladislava Voulezj Waifu Mia Wbery Wetkitty Whiptrax Woe Senpai Xenoncos Xev Bellringer Ximena Sanchez XoXo Xxapple Yael Cohen Yanet Garcia YareLyLy YikeSaiko YinyLeon Yisela Avendano Yumisin Yungfreckz Zahra Elise Zara Jordan Zoey Sinn Zoie Burgher boobs, ass, tits, tiktok, nudes, naked, sextape, porn, leak, leaked, leaks, nsfw, onlyfans, mega, discord, telegram, new, OF, latest, corina, corrina, megnutt02, megnutt, mackzjones, charli, dixie, damelio, d amelio, waifumia Abby Lynn Abrie Baby Addison Ivy Aery Tiefling Aestra Azure Alaska Clarke Alexandra Daddario Aidra Fox Alina Becker Alina Lopez Allie Cat Alyri Alyssa Alessio Alyx Star Ameliasocurvy Anissakate Annabgo Anna Louise Anne Moore Aria Banks Aria Lee Ariana Mumtaz Ari Kytsya Asha Miller Ashhxlynxx Ashley Alban Ashley Danielle Ashley got Ashley Matheson Ashley Rey Asianbarbietina Asian Candy Asianmochi Audrey and Sadie August Taylor Austin White Autumn Renae Autumnsbum Ava Nicks Azalyastar Babyjey Babymalaya Babyprincesskai Babyrayxxx Bailey Brooke Bambitwo Bapricorn Bar6ie6 Bbygurlmax Bbystar Beatrice Segreti Belinda Nohemy Bella Jameel Bellamay Bella Rayee Bella Rome Belle Barbie Belle Olivia Belinda Nohemy Billie Ellish BlackWidof Blair Williams Blinkx Bootylikeabackroad/Gianna J Brandi Sheri Bratzmon Breckie Hill Brenda Trindade Brenda Vanessa Briadeline Brianna Amor Bridgette B Briea Harm Bronwin Aurora Bubblebratz Bundleofbec Bunni.emmie Bunniemai1591 Bunni3png Byoru Callmesherni Canela Skin Carolina Samani Catgirl Cecilia Lion Cardi B Carli Nicki Cassie Curses Celina Powell Charlotte Emerson Charlotte Parkes Chelsea Wilde Chelxie Cherry Apricots Chloe Rannoch Chrissy Knox Chulaslim Cierra Mistt Clarababylegs/clarakitty Coconey Connell Twins Cottonkelly Cutepowerlegs Daisy Drew Dakota Jade Dakota James Dakota Johnson Dana Hamm Dan Dangler Dani Fae Danilanio Dawn Marie Devon Jenelle Dia Kimeko DickForLily DoubleDoseTwins Effycutiexx Elisa Esposito Elizabeth Olsen Elizabeth Vasilenko Eliza Ibarra Ellalx0x Elle Knox Elliesapplepie Ellyandnick Elsa Love Emirafoods Emjaybird EmjayPlays Emmmyxo Ennid Wong Erotic Medusa Erxticgoddess Erzabel Esmeeteaches Eva Elfie Fairyalexx FatherKels Fareeha Bakir Fetching Butterflies Fiamurr Fifigirl9 Fitchick_em Fit Emily Foopah Frootbabie Gal Gadot Gii Xoxo69 Gina Valentina Ginger Lure Giulia Rosa Gracie Waifu Gthatass Gwendolyn Celine Haley Spades Hannah Hughes Hannah Palmer HannaMiller HardForEva Helen Ivy Hime Tsu Hitomi Hoehuxtable Honey Gold Husvjjal Iamangelinadeep Ilanosh Immeganlive Inkedsophiie Iris black21 Isabella Rhoades Isabelle Eleanore Isisxox Ivanka Peach Ivana Knoll IzzyBunnies Jada Conbreezy Jade Lavoie Jade Kush Jaileen/Jaixpetite Jakara Baby Jakara Mitchell Jamelizzzz Jasmineteaa Jasmyn2juicey / Kaylee4keeps Jazvip Jenna Chew Jenna Lynn Meowri Jessica Weaver Jewelz Blu Jia Lissa Joanniefit JOracekuJO Josephine Jackson JuicyFakku Just-Wingit Kaelundeen KaileGoh Kaitlyn/k8lyn096 Kalinka Fox Kate Kuray Katie Milkers Katsokinky Katti Colour Kaylani Lei Kazumi's World Kelli Carter Key Chicaiza Kiko Baka Kiley Lynn Kim Brûlée Kiyomi Leslie Kristen Kindle Kkimkkimmy Lady In The Streets Lana Bee Laura Lux Lauren Jasmine LauraSahar Lauren Burch Lasirena69 Lavaxgrl Layla Brooks Layladeline Leah Larsh Lems7 Lena Kitsune Lena12 Leyna Inu Lilbussygirl Lilmochidoll Lilwaifulia Liya Perez Lily Phillips Lily Shams LillyVig Lina Belfiore Lindsay Capuano Littlespoonz Liya Silver Lolaxmina Loonassoftfeet LoveAngelica Low-keydeadinside Lucy Doll Lucy Mochi Lulu Chu LydiaGh0st Lynarita Lyra Crow Maddy Belle Madiitay Madisonwilde Milakitten Maikonidesvip Margot Robbie Mariaaskyy Maria del Mar Mariam Hadid Marie Temara Marisol Yotta Mary Burke Meggyeggo Mei Kou Mei Minato Meladinha Mellooow Melwood Mercedes Blanche Mia Falls Mia Monroe Michelle Rabbit Mikayla Demaiter Mikki Marie Milababy69 Mila Sobolov Minavenetavip Miss Banana Miss Bunda Miss Dxxx Miss Lexa Misstiff Model_gg Molly X Moody Feet Morgpie Morganlanexo Motzie Mvngokitty Nanda Reyes Nataliexking Natalnya Natasha Noel Naya Dickson Nebraskawut Neiima Nicki Minaj Nicole Dobrikov Nikitaxkim / Nikita Cruze Nina Kayy Nnnnekochan Nonsalemwitch Norafawn Nymphet Angel Oakleyraeee Ocicat Officialzoerenea Oliviamaebae Okichloeo Olivia Eden Orphicbunny Paigeuncaged Paige Woolen Pantynectar Patricia Lopez Pengali Princess Phia Pixei Praewasian Prosexx Puppiwi P7oh7 Queen Needy Queenqawan Quinnfinite Quqco Railey Diesel Rainey James Razorbaby Realprettyangel RealSkyBri Redheadwinter Renata Riww RileyFans Romi Rain Rori Rain Rose Monroe Roxysdream SaabSilvi Saleemamansur Samantona Saucekaybaby Savana Sky Scarlett Johansson Scarlet Silva Senya Marin Shania Perrett Shinratensei98 Shycutie Siegex Sierra Cabot Skyexxxsummers Skyiiah Snaxychann Sienna Mae Gomez Skylar Blue Sofiallia Fiaax2 Safiyaax Sofia Mariana Sofia Silk Sophielaurenxxo Soogsx and Puppiwii Stella Barey Steffy Moreno Stefanie Gurzanski Steph Murves Summer Brookes Sweetie Fox Sydneymay Tahlia Hall Tanababyxo Tantot Twins Tayathegoddess TayTatted Tayylavie TheBaeBreanna Theesammyjo TheGorillaGrip Theprivateavocado Tiffanynhoe Tiny Texie Talia Mar Triplex Celeste Trippie Bri Trishyland Tru Kait Urfavbellabby Ur69baby Uwucatxoxo Valeria Vidal Vanessa.rhd Vanessa Sierra Vega Thompson Vero Gold Veronica Zolotova Vismara Martina Vyvan Le Wettmelons Whoahannahjo Whosbonnieandclyde Xailormoon Xenon Xlucy Yasmine Lopez Yololary YourSuggerBaby KVER3 Yoya Grey Yummy Kimmy Yur Aular Zayla Skye Zipoz Zusje Addison Rae Faith Ordway Emily Ratajkowsk Emma Chamberlain Dixie D'Amelio Madison Beer Erin Gilfoy danielle bregoli2023.06.03 17:47 KuwabarasHeadband Blinken Dismisses Calls for a Ceasefire, Says US Must Build Up Ukraine’s Military - antiwar.com
Blinken Dismisses Calls for a Ceasefire, Says US Must Build Up Ukraine’s Militaryhttps://news.antiwar.com/2023/06/02/blinken-dismisses-calls-for-a-ceasefire-says-us-must-build-up-ukraines-military/
The Secretary of State called for Washington to continue to put militarism before diplomacy
by Kyle Anzalone - Posted onJune 2, 2023
The US will focus its efforts on arming Ukraine and not attempting to bring the war to a negotiated settlement, America’s top diplomat said. Secretary of State Antony Blinken laid out a plan to massively expand Kiev’s military before talks begin.
In a speech delivered in Finland on Friday, Blinken stated, "The United States – together with our allies and partners – is firmly committed to supporting Ukraine’s defense today, tomorrow, for as long as it takes." He continued, "We believe the prerequisite for meaningful diplomacy and real peace is a stronger Ukraine, capable of deterring and defending against any future aggression."
Blinken dismissed the idea of even a temporary pause in the fighting. "Some countries will call for a ceasefire. And on the surface, that sounds sensible – attractive, even. After all, who doesn’t want warring parties to lay down their arms? Who doesn’t want the killing to stop?" He said. "But a ceasefire that simply freezes current lines in place and enables Putin to consolidate control over the territory he’s seized…It would legitimize Russia’s land grab. It would reward the aggressor and punish the victim."
The Secretary of State offered an ambitious vision of Kiev’s future military capabilities. "America and our allies are helping meet Ukraine’s needs on the current battlefield while developing a force that can deter and defend against aggression for years to come." He added, "That means helping build a Ukrainian military of the future, with long-term funding, a strong air force centered on modern combat aircraft, an integrated air and missile defense network, advanced tanks and armored vehicles, national capacity to produce ammunition, and the training and support to keep forces and equipment combat-ready."
It is unclear how long it would take to build the deterrence force envisioned by Blinken. American arms stockpiles are dwindling as Washington attempts to transfer Kiev enough military equipment to keep its army fighting. The US additionally has plans to significantly increase arms transfers to Taiwan.
Blinken claimed, "Our support for Ukraine hasn’t weakened our capabilities to meet potential threats from China or anywhere else – it’s strengthened them." In November, the Wall Street Journal reported, "US government and congressional officials fear the conflict in Ukraine is exacerbating a nearly $19 billion backlog of weapons bound for Taiwan, further delaying efforts to arm the island."
Additionally, the White House may not have the support it needs in the Capitol for such a massive military buildup in Ukraine. Blinken asserted that "in America, this support is bipartisan." However, at the beginning of May, Rep. Michael McCaul (R-TX), chairman of the House Foreign Affairs Committee, said future support for Ukraine would be contingent on success in Kiev’s long-planned counteroffensive.
Since McCaul’s statement, Ukraine has slowly lost more territory to Russian forces, including Bakhmut. Zelensky committed endless resources to the city in a months-long battle despite the advice from his Western backers. The White House is now preparing for the counteroffensive to fail.
Washington’s strategy, as laid out by Blinken, calls for arming Ukraine and weakening Russia. "Russia is significantly worse off today than it was before its full-scale invasion of Ukraine – militarily, economically, geopolitically," he stated, adding, "President Putin has diminished Russian influence on every continent."
However, Gen. Christopher Cavoli, the commander of US European Command, told Congress in April that Moscow’s ground forces are "bigger today" than before Moscow launched its invasion of Ukraine last year.
While the White House has attempted to isolate the Kremlin, Moscow has weathered Western sanctions by developing relationships in the global south. On Friday, Russian officials met with prospective members of the BRICS coalition, including Saudi Arabia, Iran and the UAE. In September, Iran’s President Ebrahim Raisi said in a meeting with Putin, "The relationship between countries that are sanctioned by the US, such as Iran, Russia or other countries, can overcome many problems and issues and make them stronger."
Blinken justified the Biden administration’s commitment to a militaristic approach by claiming the White House attempted to engage the Kremlin in meaningful diplomacy before the invasion of Ukraine. "President Biden told President Putin that we were prepared to discuss our mutual security concerns – a message that I reaffirmed repeatedly – including in person, with Foreign Minister Lavrov." The Secretary of State continued, "We offered written proposals to reduce tensions. Together with our allies and partners, we used every forum to try to prevent war, from the NATO-Russia Council to the OSCE, from the UN to our direct channels."
In April 2022, Biden administration official Derek Chollet admitted that the White House refused to negotiate with the Krem[l]in on Putin’s core concern, Ukraine becoming a member of NATO. "We made clear to the Russians that we were willing to talk to them on issues that we thought were genuine concerns," Chollet said, adding that the administration didn’t think that "the future of Ukraine" was one of those issues and that its potential NATO membership was a "non-issue."
2023.06.03 16:45 Big_Estate9575 [WTS][USA] Size 10-11 Off-White; White Cement Jordan 4; TS Fragment Low; Dunks
https://imgur.com/a/YBOZztC
Find detailed images on the imgur
USA Only
$10 built into prices for shipping
RFA White Cement 4 - Size 10 - OG All - Worn once- $110
GOD Batch Dunks - Size 10 - OG All - DS - $60
PK/CoCo Travis Scott Jordan 1 Low Fragment - Size 10.5 - OG All (film peeled off of outer plastic shroud during shipping) - DS - $120
Unknown Batch NRG Off White Jordan 1 - Size 11 - OG NONE - Worn once - $80
OWF Air Max Desert Ore - Size 11 - Box destroyed, comes with zip tie and extra laces - DS - $80
PayPal Invoice
submitted by Big_Estate9575 to RepSneakersBST [link] [comments]
Find detailed images on the imgur
USA Only
$10 built into prices for shipping
RFA White Cement 4 - Size 10 - OG All - Worn once- $110
GOD Batch Dunks - Size 10 - OG All - DS - $60
PK/CoCo Travis Scott Jordan 1 Low Fragment - Size 10.5 - OG All (film peeled off of outer plastic shroud during shipping) - DS - $120
Unknown Batch NRG Off White Jordan 1 - Size 11 - OG NONE - Worn once - $80
OWF Air Max Desert Ore - Size 11 - Box destroyed, comes with zip tie and extra laces - DS - $80
PayPal Invoice
2023.06.03 16:41 mariussa1 750+ FINDS PANDABUY SPREADSHEET WITH QC PHOTOS!!
https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/12dXJcMY6bs8oqn_cH-zvSglHZ6Ee8DwGm86vFNoEih4/edit?usp=sharing
For the last couple of months I have been collecting over 750+ of the best Pandabuy finds into a comprehensive spreadsheet! Each item in the spreadsheet has QC photos and prices listed in both CNY and USD! I will regularly update the spreadsheet to include new finds and replace out-of-stock items! So please bookmark this spreadsheet!
I've categorized the finds, making it incredibly easy to navigate and find precisely what you're looking for. Items are categorized like this: SHOES, HOODIES/SWEATERS, T-SHIRTS, JACKETS, PANTS/SHORTS, HATS/HEADWEAR, ACCESSORIES, OTHER STUFF
Items/brands featured are: Nike, Air Jordan 1, 4, 11, Dunk Low, Lobster, Air Force 1, Air Max, Vapormax, Bape, Bapesta, Yeezy 350, Slides, New Balance, Rick Owens, Balenciaga, Triple S, Defender, Track, Pollex Crocs, Kapital, Mastermind, Palace, Sicko Pain, Travis Scott, Broken Planet Market, Revenge, Stussy, CPFM, Supreme, True Religion, Trapstar, Essentials, Fear of God, FOG, Gallery Dept, Playboi Carti, Vivienne Westwood, Kids See Ghosts, GAP, Golf Wang, Sp5der, Chrome Hearts, Drake, Vuja De, Vetements, Far-Archive, Off-White, Divide The Youth, Joy Divizn, Hellstar, The North Face, Kaws, Burberry, Represent, Polo Ralph Lauren, Vlone, Los Pollos Hermanos, Better Call Saul, Kanye West, Metro Boomin, A$AP Rocky, Neon Genesis, JoJo's Bizarre Adventure, Ken Carson, Aphex Twin, American Psycho, Anti Social Club, Palm Angels, Stone Island, Football Jerseys, Basketball, Goth Money Records, Bladee, Drain Gang, Moncler, Corvidae, RAF Simons, Dior, F1, Prada, Candada Goose, Carhartt, Lacoste, Denham, Rhude, Gucci, Eric Emanuel, Minus Two, RMC Jeans, No Faith Studios, Polar Skate Big Boy, Dime, Calvin Klein, NBA, Yeat, CP Company, Balaclava, Durag, Tyler The Creator, Saint Michael, Amiri, Goyard, Louis Vuiton, B.B Simon, Belts, Pit Viper, McDonalds, Alyx, MF DOOM, Gundam, Pokémon, Breaking Bad, Lego, Dragon Ball Z, Star Wars, Ninjago, Marvel, iPhone, Takashi Murakami, Tech Deck, Disney, Death Note, Among Us, Minecraft, South Park, Beyblade, Kontrol Freek, Ice Spice
submitted by mariussa1 to u/mariussa1 [link] [comments]
For the last couple of months I have been collecting over 750+ of the best Pandabuy finds into a comprehensive spreadsheet! Each item in the spreadsheet has QC photos and prices listed in both CNY and USD! I will regularly update the spreadsheet to include new finds and replace out-of-stock items! So please bookmark this spreadsheet!
I've categorized the finds, making it incredibly easy to navigate and find precisely what you're looking for. Items are categorized like this: SHOES, HOODIES/SWEATERS, T-SHIRTS, JACKETS, PANTS/SHORTS, HATS/HEADWEAR, ACCESSORIES, OTHER STUFF
Items/brands featured are: Nike, Air Jordan 1, 4, 11, Dunk Low, Lobster, Air Force 1, Air Max, Vapormax, Bape, Bapesta, Yeezy 350, Slides, New Balance, Rick Owens, Balenciaga, Triple S, Defender, Track, Pollex Crocs, Kapital, Mastermind, Palace, Sicko Pain, Travis Scott, Broken Planet Market, Revenge, Stussy, CPFM, Supreme, True Religion, Trapstar, Essentials, Fear of God, FOG, Gallery Dept, Playboi Carti, Vivienne Westwood, Kids See Ghosts, GAP, Golf Wang, Sp5der, Chrome Hearts, Drake, Vuja De, Vetements, Far-Archive, Off-White, Divide The Youth, Joy Divizn, Hellstar, The North Face, Kaws, Burberry, Represent, Polo Ralph Lauren, Vlone, Los Pollos Hermanos, Better Call Saul, Kanye West, Metro Boomin, A$AP Rocky, Neon Genesis, JoJo's Bizarre Adventure, Ken Carson, Aphex Twin, American Psycho, Anti Social Club, Palm Angels, Stone Island, Football Jerseys, Basketball, Goth Money Records, Bladee, Drain Gang, Moncler, Corvidae, RAF Simons, Dior, F1, Prada, Candada Goose, Carhartt, Lacoste, Denham, Rhude, Gucci, Eric Emanuel, Minus Two, RMC Jeans, No Faith Studios, Polar Skate Big Boy, Dime, Calvin Klein, NBA, Yeat, CP Company, Balaclava, Durag, Tyler The Creator, Saint Michael, Amiri, Goyard, Louis Vuiton, B.B Simon, Belts, Pit Viper, McDonalds, Alyx, MF DOOM, Gundam, Pokémon, Breaking Bad, Lego, Dragon Ball Z, Star Wars, Ninjago, Marvel, iPhone, Takashi Murakami, Tech Deck, Disney, Death Note, Among Us, Minecraft, South Park, Beyblade, Kontrol Freek, Ice Spice
2023.06.03 16:40 mariussa1 750+ FINDS PANDABUY SPREADSHEET WITH QC PHOTOS!!
https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/12dXJcMY6bs8oqn_cH-zvSglHZ6Ee8DwGm86vFNoEih4/edit?usp=sharing
For the last couple of months I have been collecting over 750+ of the best Pandabuy finds into a comprehensive spreadsheet! Each item in the spreadsheet has QC photos and prices listed in both CNY and USD! I will regularly update the spreadsheet to include new finds and replace out-of-stock items! So please bookmark this spreadsheet!
I've categorized the finds, making it incredibly easy to navigate and find precisely what you're looking for. Items are categorized like this: SHOES, HOODIES/SWEATERS, T-SHIRTS, JACKETS, PANTS/SHORTS, HATS/HEADWEAR, ACCESSORIES, OTHER STUFF
Items/brands featured are: Nike, Air Jordan 1, 4, 11, Dunk Low, Lobster, Air Force 1, Air Max, Vapormax, Bape, Bapesta, Yeezy 350, Slides, New Balance, Rick Owens, Balenciaga, Triple S, Defender, Track, Pollex Crocs, Kapital, Mastermind, Palace, Sicko Pain, Travis Scott, Broken Planet Market, Revenge, Stussy, CPFM, Supreme, True Religion, Trapstar, Essentials, Fear of God, FOG, Gallery Dept, Playboi Carti, Vivienne Westwood, Kids See Ghosts, GAP, Golf Wang, Sp5der, Chrome Hearts, Drake, Vuja De, Vetements, Far-Archive, Off-White, Divide The Youth, Joy Divizn, Hellstar, The North Face, Kaws, Burberry, Represent, Polo Ralph Lauren, Vlone, Los Pollos Hermanos, Better Call Saul, Kanye West, Metro Boomin, A$AP Rocky, Neon Genesis, JoJo's Bizarre Adventure, Ken Carson, Aphex Twin, American Psycho, Anti Social Club, Palm Angels, Stone Island, Football Jerseys, Basketball, Goth Money Records, Bladee, Drain Gang, Moncler, Corvidae, RAF Simons, Dior, F1, Prada, Candada Goose, Carhartt, Lacoste, Denham, Rhude, Gucci, Eric Emanuel, Minus Two, RMC Jeans, No Faith Studios, Polar Skate Big Boy, Dime, Calvin Klein, NBA, Yeat, CP Company, Balaclava, Durag, Tyler The Creator, Saint Michael, Amiri, Goyard, Louis Vuiton, B.B Simon, Belts, Pit Viper, McDonalds, Alyx, MF DOOM, Gundam, Pokémon, Breaking Bad, Lego, Dragon Ball Z, Star Wars, Ninjago, Marvel, iPhone, Takashi Murakami, Tech Deck, Disney, Death Note, Among Us, Minecraft, South Park, Beyblade, Kontrol Freek, Ice Spice
submitted by mariussa1 to pandabuycontent [link] [comments]
For the last couple of months I have been collecting over 750+ of the best Pandabuy finds into a comprehensive spreadsheet! Each item in the spreadsheet has QC photos and prices listed in both CNY and USD! I will regularly update the spreadsheet to include new finds and replace out-of-stock items! So please bookmark this spreadsheet!
I've categorized the finds, making it incredibly easy to navigate and find precisely what you're looking for. Items are categorized like this: SHOES, HOODIES/SWEATERS, T-SHIRTS, JACKETS, PANTS/SHORTS, HATS/HEADWEAR, ACCESSORIES, OTHER STUFF
Items/brands featured are: Nike, Air Jordan 1, 4, 11, Dunk Low, Lobster, Air Force 1, Air Max, Vapormax, Bape, Bapesta, Yeezy 350, Slides, New Balance, Rick Owens, Balenciaga, Triple S, Defender, Track, Pollex Crocs, Kapital, Mastermind, Palace, Sicko Pain, Travis Scott, Broken Planet Market, Revenge, Stussy, CPFM, Supreme, True Religion, Trapstar, Essentials, Fear of God, FOG, Gallery Dept, Playboi Carti, Vivienne Westwood, Kids See Ghosts, GAP, Golf Wang, Sp5der, Chrome Hearts, Drake, Vuja De, Vetements, Far-Archive, Off-White, Divide The Youth, Joy Divizn, Hellstar, The North Face, Kaws, Burberry, Represent, Polo Ralph Lauren, Vlone, Los Pollos Hermanos, Better Call Saul, Kanye West, Metro Boomin, A$AP Rocky, Neon Genesis, JoJo's Bizarre Adventure, Ken Carson, Aphex Twin, American Psycho, Anti Social Club, Palm Angels, Stone Island, Football Jerseys, Basketball, Goth Money Records, Bladee, Drain Gang, Moncler, Corvidae, RAF Simons, Dior, F1, Prada, Candada Goose, Carhartt, Lacoste, Denham, Rhude, Gucci, Eric Emanuel, Minus Two, RMC Jeans, No Faith Studios, Polar Skate Big Boy, Dime, Calvin Klein, NBA, Yeat, CP Company, Balaclava, Durag, Tyler The Creator, Saint Michael, Amiri, Goyard, Louis Vuiton, B.B Simon, Belts, Pit Viper, McDonalds, Alyx, MF DOOM, Gundam, Pokémon, Breaking Bad, Lego, Dragon Ball Z, Star Wars, Ninjago, Marvel, iPhone, Takashi Murakami, Tech Deck, Disney, Death Note, Among Us, Minecraft, South Park, Beyblade, Kontrol Freek, Ice Spice
2023.06.03 16:29 xtremexavier15 TSROTI 2 (pt 2)
The scene faded back in to a shot of some treetops, Sammy saying "Well, even though we didn't finish, I'm glad I didn't get targeted," as the camera panned down to the Rats walking through the woods. "It was bad enough watching Leshawna and DJ go through it."
"Girl, you can't let that stuff get to you," Leshawna told her, the two girls walking at the front of their team's pack. "Sure it's humiliating, but it'll pass in time. Besides, it's not like any of us would've held your secrets against you, not when my secret was revealed."
"I hadn't thought of that," Sammy said with a contemplative look.
"We can't let our fears control us. It'll just prevent us from achieving what we want to do," Sierra told her team while focusing on her phone. She tripped on a rock and landed on her face as a result.
Confessional: Sammy
"Back home, there's this girl who's basically the princess of my school," Sammy exclaimed. "She leaks out the students' personal secrets just to get even with them or simply be mean," she gulped, "and when one of my own secrets got posted, I was teased for a week."
"Thankfully, my friends didn't bother me about it and still continued to hang out with me."
Confessional Ends
The scene cut back to the Maggots, also walking through the woods together, and focused on Anne Maria and Katie at the middle of their pack.
"This is the longest I've ever gone without using an electronic," Katie droned. "How am I gonna talk to my viewers about my day and give them advice?"
"You don't need to be on a device 24/7," Anne Maria spoke to the girl.
"Easy for you to say," Katie said snottily. "You don't have to worry about vlogs since you focus on maintaining your hair."
"Ya think that's easy?" Anne Maria retorted calmly. "I have to work overtime at a diner just to buy all the hairspray that I can afford."
Confessional: Katie
"Maybe I could've been nicer there," Katie admitted, "but my subscribers can go down if I don't upload anything."
Confessional Ends
The shot cut ahead to Scarlett and Molly, the former looking like she's been listening to the conversation behind her. "Chris has created a disadvantage for us by taking away Katie's gadget right before the game!"
"True, but Chris thankfully had the decency to end the challenge before he could reveal any more of our embarrassments," Molly said.
"The host just thrives off our pain and suffering," Scarlett summarized.
"You can say that again," Molly told her. "Sociopathy is something that could be cured, but Chris is way long gone."
\
"Welcome, players!" Chris announced over the loudspeaker again, the camera cutting down to ground level to show the Rats meeting up with the Maggots again. "Now that you're all here, it's time for part two of today's challenge," the host continued, the shot zooming out to show all thirteen campers standing in some sort of wide field of mud with a wooden ramp leading up off-camera on the right.
"The 'Mad Skills Obstacle Course'," Chris announced, the shot cutting to him standing on some patch of grass.
"The relay race begins with a mad dash from the Kick Start," the shot cut to the wooden platform at the other end of the ramp, where an absurdly large rubber root was connected by wooden shaft and gear to a pole sticking up out of the platform. "Forget coffee," the host said as the boot swung squeakily back and forth in demonstration, "if this baby doesn't get you goin', nothin' will."
"Then it's off to the race against time that is the Cannonball Run," Chris said, the camera following his motion further onward to another stretch of wooden platform. Several cannons situated below suddenly blew gaping holes in it, and the shot zoomed out to show several more cannons hooked up to a scaffold over the platform and aimed downward.
"Over to my personal fave," the shot moved to the end of the platform where a log had been set up to rotate on its side, "Wrecking Ball Alley! Hurts so good," he said as the camera panned across and the titular wrecking ball swung down over the rolling log.
"And moving on," the shot cut next to a few higher, disconnected, and generally precarious platforms, "we head to the Gang Plank, complete with rabid mutant beavers." The shot cut to the mud pit at the bottom where two giant wooly beavers with boney spikes along their back were busily chewing through the poles the gang plank platforms were on.
"Followed by," the shot cut to a close-up of a large, red, butt-shaped apparatus that was moving up and down, "the bouncy agony of Double Trouble." The shot zoomed out to show four of the butt-shaped things moving up and down between two platforms.
"And finally," Chris said, "the Grand Slam," the shot cut to several giant baseball bats sticking up out of the mud surrounding an equally giant baseball mitt, "where you'll use ropes to swing into the giant baseball mitt, while avoiding those deadly bats." The shot zoomed in on the mitt, then panned over to one of the bats as a small red bird flew head-first into it, knocking it out with a clonk. "Piece of cake," Chris said with a chuckle as the shot cut back to the staring and nervous campers.
"Oh, and as you may remember," the host added, "I said that the winning team from part one would have a distinct advantage in part two?"
"But there was no winner!" Sierra reminded the host. "You canceled the first part!"
"Yeah, don't remind me," Chris answered in annoyance. "The losing team was gonna wear snazzy specs while competing," he explained with a chipper smile, "but since we never actually finished the competition," he became annoyed again, "I've decided that everybody has to wear them!" He laughed, and the campers looked behind them to see Chef Hatchet holding a cardboard box.
Dave was the first to step forward, taking out one of the pairs of glasses – thick, ugly things that almost seemed to have a greenish tint to them – and put them on. His brow shot up immediately. "Hey, what's with the old glasses?" he asked. "We won't be able to see anything wearing these!" The perspective shifted to demonstrate what he was seeing, which was little more than an incredibly blurry shot of the forest and some unknown body of water.
"Dorktacular goggles won't make part two easy," Chris said, "or attractive," he shrugged, "but it can be done. In theory."
The campers groaned.
"Since the Maggots have one more player than the Rats," Chris added on, "one of them has to sit this one out."
"It should be Katie," Scarlett suggested to her team, "She's still suffering from her tech withdrawal."
"Fine by me," Molly boldly said. "I don't want her losing for us."
"Competitors, take your positions!" he said, and the footage flashed forward to show Anne Maria and Geoff together near the edge of the first platform, the jersey shore reject waving her hands in front of her face in order to see. "First up at the Kick Start it's Anne Maria against Geoff," the host said before the shot moved on to the next pair. "Then, it's DJ versus Sammy," the brickhouse and nervous cheerleader looked about before the shot pulled back to show the cannons, "versus the Cannonballs."
"Molly faces Scott in Wrecking Ball Alley," the indie chick and devious stared at each other, the former more competitively. "B is up against Scarlett in the Gang Plank," the camera cut to the base of the ladder then panned all the way up to it to the strong, silent genius and the quiet brainiac on top, "Dave and Leshawna will battle Double Trouble," the normal guy looked warily at the butt-shaped apparatus in front of him while the sista just cracked her knuckles, "and, Sierra will fight Trent for the Grand Slam." The obsessive uberfan nervously looked around while the cool guy tried to maintain his balance, the shot moving out to show the baseball mitt.
"First team to finish wins the whoooole shebang," Chris explained. "And, the other team loses a member tonight! Since it's a relay race," he added, "you'll need something to pass: your mascots," he said with a grin. "Oh, intern~!"
A scrawny white boy with his long black hair flipped over his eyes walked up to Geoff and Anne Maria holding a pair of pet carriers; whatever was inside was snarling angrily enough for the two competitors to exchange a wary look. "Team Rat gets a mutant rat," Chris announced as the intern thrust a large, squealing, six-legged hairless rat into Geoff's arms. "And Team Maggot gets," the host continued, "a mutant maggot," a large, slimy green maggot was thrust into Anne Maria's arms.
"Ew. It's a what?" Anne Maria said in surprise.
"Aaaand," Chris said as he prepared an airhorn, "go!"
At the sound of the horn the giant boot swung down on the two campers. With a yelp Anne Maria managed to duck out of the way, but Geoff was not so lucky and got sent flying with a scream. He landed in the mud between platforms, but kept the rat held high. It burped as Chris said "And Geoff gets the boot!"
Anne Maria hopped across the gap between platforms with the maggot in her arms.
"Anne Maria takes the early lead," Chris continued, and the jersey girl ran up to DJ.
"Here!" Anne Maria held out their mascot.
"I'll take this cute critter from here," DJ took the maggot from her, then turned and ran off down the course.
"Yeah, I got it goin' on," Anne Maria walked back the opposite way...and blindly fell into the gap between platforms, landing with a squelch of mud.
The shot cut to DJ as he ran along his part of the platform. He slammed face-first into a post, then recoiled a few steps. He vigorously shook his head and sidestepped around the post. He only got another two steps before a sudden cannon volley through the floor in front of him forced him to a stop with a yelp.
Now covered in mud, Geoff ran along the first part of the platform with his rat held out in front of him. He jumped the gap, and soon reached Sammy. "We're already far behind! Go!" the party boy held out their team's mascot.
"Got it!" Sammy said, grabbing the rat and running off.
"The Rats take the lead!" Chris called out as Sammy caught up to DJ at the start of the cannonball run. Another cannon fired towards them, forcing both to dart and duck out of the way.
"Okay," Sammy assured herself, "I just have to dodge a bunch of cannons that are impossible to see!" She charged forward, leaving DJ to chase after her.
"Time to try again," DJ added in.
The scene moved to Scott and Molly waiting at the start of the next leg. Sammy ran up and thrust the rat into Scott's arms, panting after she did so.
"Wow. We're in the lead? Great," Scott realized and started to walk slowly. "Nice and slow, all the way to last place. Right, little guy?" He told the rat while walking along the rolling log, but the rat bit him in the chin. He howled painfully and missed the wrecking ball swinging down at him. It caught him and sent him flying, all the way into B.
"Faster, DJ!" Molly yelled as DJ ran up to her and handed over their maggot.
"Good luck," DJ supported Molly as she headed for the rolling logs.
Scott was lying on the floor and petting the rat with B watching as the shot cut back to them.
"Aww, who's my good freak? Who's my good little freak?" Scott faux affectionately talked to the rat in order to slow them down as B was signaling him to pass it to him. "There, there, little guy. Uncle Scotty kept you safe and sound." He saw B waiting. "Oh, do you want this? Why didn't you say so, Beverly?"
Having enough, B took the rat before putting it in his pocket and jumped on to the first precariously isolated platform. It immediately started to wobble and sink, and B quietly cried out in alarm as the camera quick-panned to the base revealing the two mutant beavers making quick work of the pole, causing him to fall down into the mud. He recovered and saw the two ferocious-looking beavers he had landed next to.
Molly was looking up and back just in time to see the wrecking ball swinging towards her. She jumped up, safely grabbing on to the ball and allowing it to carry her forward. She jumped off at the extent of its swing, and sailed further on through the air.
The camera quick-panned over to B as he hastily sculpted a female beaver out of mud. The two beavers looked past the muddy feel and fell in love with it. As they ran over to hug it, B sneakily slipped past.
"And in a surprisingly touching move, B extends the Rats' lead," Chris announced out loud.
Scott was watching from where he landed. "Oh, come on!" he whined in disappointment.
"Go now!" Molly told Scarlett as she handed the maggot over, Scarlett immediately turning.
The beavers stopped hugging the mud sculptured beaver when the head fell off. Realizing that they were tricked, they soon turned vengeful.
Scarlett hopped to the first platform. It immediately wobbled thanks to the beavers gnawing the leg, taking Scarlett down.
"Alright, my brotha!" Leshawna cheered and took the rat from the tired B. "Let me take it from here."
Leshawna threw herself on to the first butt-shaped thing, landed, and bounced off it without a word. She continued on in this way, bouncing from one to the next until eventually she reached the end. "Sierra, take it!" she yelled to her teammate, the fangirl waiting with her back turned at the edge of the next platform.
Despite stretching her rat-holding arms out towards him as she fell, Leshawna was unable to make the pass-off in time before falling completely past her and landing in the mud. "What?" Sierra said as she finally turned around. "Aww. I missed the catch."
The shot cut to Leshawna face down in the mud. The mutant rat scampered out of her grasp. With a growl, Leshawna scrambled to her feet and chased after it screaming "Get back here!"
"Here you go," Scarlett told her teammate as the shot cut back to her holding the muddy and slimy maggot out to him.
"Got it!" Dave said as he reached out for the mutated larva.
It promptly vomited onto his face.
"IT THREW UP ON ME!!!" Dave freaked out and ran while one of the beavers grabbed Scarlett's head and dragged her down.
The perspective briefly changed to show the blurry obstacle that Dave was approaching, then changed back to his head-on close-up as he became visibly determined.
"The quicker I finish this, the quicker I can clean up!" Dave told himself just as he jumped onto the first butt-shaped object; he landed on his chest with a pained yelp and bounced off, continuing on painfully from one bouncy apparatus to the next until eventually he landed on his chest on the far platform with a slam and a groan.
"And Dave takes back the lead for the Maggots!" Chris announced, the camera cutting to him and Chef on their chairs. "He really doesn't like to get messy."
"Alright, it's my turn!" Trent declared confidently, turning proudly towards the end of the course.
"Hurry up!" Dave told him impatiently.
The camera panned back to the left, passing Dave and reaching Sierra just as Leshawna forced their team's mascot into her arms. "Here!" she commanded.
"Sorry I didn't catch it in time," Sierra apologized.
"It's like they say on Blackcomb Mountain. "Best glimpse of heaven's on the way into-" Trent said before reaching the giant mitt and saw how far it was. "Hello."
Meanwhile, Scarlett was in danger courtesy of the two beavers.
"I would ask if you detach from me now," Scarlett begged while a beaver took out a bottle of ketchup and licked their teeth. "I warned you," Scarlett growled before kicking both of their groins, making them moan. "If you had simply not taken me, then I wouldn't have had to resort to kicking you two. I show no sympathy."
Sierra had finally caught up to Trent in the Grand Slam. "This is like the electric eel part of the trust challenge from season one," Sierra talked to herself before grabbing one of the ropes that had been loosely tied there and swung off.
She passed between the baseball bats, and planted her feet on the baseball mitt. Sierra slowly lost her standing and fell into the mud. "Being splattered by mud is better than being electrocuted I guess," she laughed a bit.
Back at the edge of the platform, Trent grabbed the end of the other rope. He unleashed his own terrified cry as he swung blindly through the Grand Slam, and almost made it to the mitt – but slammed into one of the last bats with his legs spread wide. He painfully groaned as he slid down into the mud.
The footage skipped ahead to show a muddy Sierra running up for her second go, the ropes once again tied to a post on the side of the platform. "This time, I should swing higher. Then I'll be on the mitt for sure," the blogger discussed with herself.
"C'mon Sierra!" Geoff called out to her, the shot cutting to show him and the other Rats standing on a nearby platform without the glasses that had been forced on them. "Swing!"
Sierra grabbed one of the ropes again and jumped off. She stuck her legs out in front of her and passed by each bat in turn. However, her muddy hands caused her to fall from the rope just before she reached the mitt and she fell into the mud.
The Rats all groaned.
The camera panned past them and on to Trent, who had grabbed his own rope again and was sizing up his next swing. "My team needs the win," he told himself, tucking the maggot under his arm as he used his fingers to frame his target.
The music turned triumphant as he ran forward and swung off. He hit all the bats, and the peak of his swing put him just about over the mitt. It was then that he let go of the rope and fell down towards the goal, landing on his head as the maggot landed on top of him.
"The Maggots win!" Chris announced, and the maggot mascot threw up on the musician.
The Maggots cheered, having also discarded their glasses, while the five nearby members of the Toxic Rats groaned once more.
"To the Maggots, the spoils," Chris announced as Chef walked over to the winning team holding some kind of gift basket. "McLean Brand Soap, Shampoo, and Conditioner. Guaranteed to wash off the stink!" the host listed over a close-up of the gift basket, showing off its contents against a radiant yellow background.
"I'll definitely keep those in handy!" Dave said with a smile.
"Make sure not to hog all of it," Katie reminded him.
Confessional: Katie
"If my team was up for elimination, I probably would have been the one eliminated, and I wouldn't have my tablet with me. I dodged a bullet there," Katie cheered.
Confessional Ends
"Rats, see you at the elimination ceremony!' Chris added with his usual smile.
The five members of the Rats groaned for a third time. "I could've used the reward to wash off the mess," Leshawna groaned.
Sierra moaned as she got off the muddy floor, coughing up mud in the process. "Losing two times in a row? That's not gonna go well for my blog."
\
The footage flashed ahead to all of the Toxic Rats except for B and Sierra assembled at the steps leading up to their cabin. The camera focused on Scott, who was standing on the ground in front of the others. "All right, guys. Sierra's gotta go. She lost the challenge for us, and she's more focused on using her phone than competing most of the time."
"Now hang on!" Geoff replied. "So she made a mistake and slipped up. We aren't robots. I'm thinking we should give her a second chance."
"Sierra is also a big fan of the show," Sammy said. "Voting her off this early wouldn't be fair to her."
"Fair, smhair," Leshawna muttered. "If eliminating her allows us to sleep without being disturbed by her constant texting to her friends, I'm all for it."
\
The footage flashed ahead again to show the Toxic Rats at the campfire pit, Chef and Chris standing before them with their respective marshmallows.
"Ready?" Chris asked. "Everyone gets a marshmallow, even the loser!" The shot cut to a close-up of the strongbox in Chef's mitted hands. "But that's one marshmallow you do not wanna eat," Chris added as his assistant flipped the lid up and revealed the bright glowing thing inside.
"To the votes! The following people are safe," the host said, picking up the first normal marshmallow off his tray. "Geoff." The party guy caught his prize with a smile.
"Leshawna." The sista sitting next to him was next, satisfied as she caught her marshmallow.
"Scott." The devious, slumped forward, raised his free left hand and caught his prize.
"And Sammy." The nervous cheerleader allowed her marshmallow to fall into her open hands.
"Which leaves, Sierra and Bev," Chris announced, earning a nervous look from both teens.
"What?" Sierra asked in shock.
"And the Marshmallow of Loserdom goes to," Chris said, trailing off as the camera slowly zoomed in on the faces of the bottom two nervous campers.
"Sierra," the host finished.
"Me? But why?" Sierra sputtered in shock while B caught his marshmallow with his mouth.
"Don't know and don't care," Chris said. "You're out."
Sierra dodged the toxic marshmallow thrown her way. "It is what it is, but one last thing!" She whipped out her phone and snapped a photo of her and her teammates, blinding their eyesight and making them audibly yelp. "#ToxicRatsForever!" she enthusiastically claimed and ran to the Hurl of Shame.
\
The footage cut over to the Dock of Shame, the camera zoomed in on Chris and Sierra in the catapult's bucket.
"Any last words before we give you the Hurl of Shame?" Chris asked.
"Of course. Can I have a self-" Sierra said before Chris unflinchingly launched her into the air. Sierra finished with a scream as she disappeared into the night.
Chris laughed. "It was a rhetorical question. Two hurls down, twelve to go! Who will be eliminated next?" he asked the camera. "Tune in, and find out, on Total! Drama! Revenge! Of! The Island!"
(Roll the Credits)
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"Girl, you can't let that stuff get to you," Leshawna told her, the two girls walking at the front of their team's pack. "Sure it's humiliating, but it'll pass in time. Besides, it's not like any of us would've held your secrets against you, not when my secret was revealed."
"I hadn't thought of that," Sammy said with a contemplative look.
"We can't let our fears control us. It'll just prevent us from achieving what we want to do," Sierra told her team while focusing on her phone. She tripped on a rock and landed on her face as a result.
Confessional: Sammy
"Back home, there's this girl who's basically the princess of my school," Sammy exclaimed. "She leaks out the students' personal secrets just to get even with them or simply be mean," she gulped, "and when one of my own secrets got posted, I was teased for a week."
"Thankfully, my friends didn't bother me about it and still continued to hang out with me."
Confessional Ends
The scene cut back to the Maggots, also walking through the woods together, and focused on Anne Maria and Katie at the middle of their pack.
"This is the longest I've ever gone without using an electronic," Katie droned. "How am I gonna talk to my viewers about my day and give them advice?"
"You don't need to be on a device 24/7," Anne Maria spoke to the girl.
"Easy for you to say," Katie said snottily. "You don't have to worry about vlogs since you focus on maintaining your hair."
"Ya think that's easy?" Anne Maria retorted calmly. "I have to work overtime at a diner just to buy all the hairspray that I can afford."
Confessional: Katie
"Maybe I could've been nicer there," Katie admitted, "but my subscribers can go down if I don't upload anything."
Confessional Ends
The shot cut ahead to Scarlett and Molly, the former looking like she's been listening to the conversation behind her. "Chris has created a disadvantage for us by taking away Katie's gadget right before the game!"
"True, but Chris thankfully had the decency to end the challenge before he could reveal any more of our embarrassments," Molly said.
"The host just thrives off our pain and suffering," Scarlett summarized.
"You can say that again," Molly told her. "Sociopathy is something that could be cured, but Chris is way long gone."
\
"Welcome, players!" Chris announced over the loudspeaker again, the camera cutting down to ground level to show the Rats meeting up with the Maggots again. "Now that you're all here, it's time for part two of today's challenge," the host continued, the shot zooming out to show all thirteen campers standing in some sort of wide field of mud with a wooden ramp leading up off-camera on the right.
"The 'Mad Skills Obstacle Course'," Chris announced, the shot cutting to him standing on some patch of grass.
"The relay race begins with a mad dash from the Kick Start," the shot cut to the wooden platform at the other end of the ramp, where an absurdly large rubber root was connected by wooden shaft and gear to a pole sticking up out of the platform. "Forget coffee," the host said as the boot swung squeakily back and forth in demonstration, "if this baby doesn't get you goin', nothin' will."
"Then it's off to the race against time that is the Cannonball Run," Chris said, the camera following his motion further onward to another stretch of wooden platform. Several cannons situated below suddenly blew gaping holes in it, and the shot zoomed out to show several more cannons hooked up to a scaffold over the platform and aimed downward.
"Over to my personal fave," the shot moved to the end of the platform where a log had been set up to rotate on its side, "Wrecking Ball Alley! Hurts so good," he said as the camera panned across and the titular wrecking ball swung down over the rolling log.
"And moving on," the shot cut next to a few higher, disconnected, and generally precarious platforms, "we head to the Gang Plank, complete with rabid mutant beavers." The shot cut to the mud pit at the bottom where two giant wooly beavers with boney spikes along their back were busily chewing through the poles the gang plank platforms were on.
"Followed by," the shot cut to a close-up of a large, red, butt-shaped apparatus that was moving up and down, "the bouncy agony of Double Trouble." The shot zoomed out to show four of the butt-shaped things moving up and down between two platforms.
"And finally," Chris said, "the Grand Slam," the shot cut to several giant baseball bats sticking up out of the mud surrounding an equally giant baseball mitt, "where you'll use ropes to swing into the giant baseball mitt, while avoiding those deadly bats." The shot zoomed in on the mitt, then panned over to one of the bats as a small red bird flew head-first into it, knocking it out with a clonk. "Piece of cake," Chris said with a chuckle as the shot cut back to the staring and nervous campers.
"Oh, and as you may remember," the host added, "I said that the winning team from part one would have a distinct advantage in part two?"
"But there was no winner!" Sierra reminded the host. "You canceled the first part!"
"Yeah, don't remind me," Chris answered in annoyance. "The losing team was gonna wear snazzy specs while competing," he explained with a chipper smile, "but since we never actually finished the competition," he became annoyed again, "I've decided that everybody has to wear them!" He laughed, and the campers looked behind them to see Chef Hatchet holding a cardboard box.
Dave was the first to step forward, taking out one of the pairs of glasses – thick, ugly things that almost seemed to have a greenish tint to them – and put them on. His brow shot up immediately. "Hey, what's with the old glasses?" he asked. "We won't be able to see anything wearing these!" The perspective shifted to demonstrate what he was seeing, which was little more than an incredibly blurry shot of the forest and some unknown body of water.
"Dorktacular goggles won't make part two easy," Chris said, "or attractive," he shrugged, "but it can be done. In theory."
The campers groaned.
"Since the Maggots have one more player than the Rats," Chris added on, "one of them has to sit this one out."
"It should be Katie," Scarlett suggested to her team, "She's still suffering from her tech withdrawal."
"Fine by me," Molly boldly said. "I don't want her losing for us."
"Competitors, take your positions!" he said, and the footage flashed forward to show Anne Maria and Geoff together near the edge of the first platform, the jersey shore reject waving her hands in front of her face in order to see. "First up at the Kick Start it's Anne Maria against Geoff," the host said before the shot moved on to the next pair. "Then, it's DJ versus Sammy," the brickhouse and nervous cheerleader looked about before the shot pulled back to show the cannons, "versus the Cannonballs."
"Molly faces Scott in Wrecking Ball Alley," the indie chick and devious stared at each other, the former more competitively. "B is up against Scarlett in the Gang Plank," the camera cut to the base of the ladder then panned all the way up to it to the strong, silent genius and the quiet brainiac on top, "Dave and Leshawna will battle Double Trouble," the normal guy looked warily at the butt-shaped apparatus in front of him while the sista just cracked her knuckles, "and, Sierra will fight Trent for the Grand Slam." The obsessive uberfan nervously looked around while the cool guy tried to maintain his balance, the shot moving out to show the baseball mitt.
"First team to finish wins the whoooole shebang," Chris explained. "And, the other team loses a member tonight! Since it's a relay race," he added, "you'll need something to pass: your mascots," he said with a grin. "Oh, intern~!"
A scrawny white boy with his long black hair flipped over his eyes walked up to Geoff and Anne Maria holding a pair of pet carriers; whatever was inside was snarling angrily enough for the two competitors to exchange a wary look. "Team Rat gets a mutant rat," Chris announced as the intern thrust a large, squealing, six-legged hairless rat into Geoff's arms. "And Team Maggot gets," the host continued, "a mutant maggot," a large, slimy green maggot was thrust into Anne Maria's arms.
"Ew. It's a what?" Anne Maria said in surprise.
"Aaaand," Chris said as he prepared an airhorn, "go!"
At the sound of the horn the giant boot swung down on the two campers. With a yelp Anne Maria managed to duck out of the way, but Geoff was not so lucky and got sent flying with a scream. He landed in the mud between platforms, but kept the rat held high. It burped as Chris said "And Geoff gets the boot!"
Anne Maria hopped across the gap between platforms with the maggot in her arms.
"Anne Maria takes the early lead," Chris continued, and the jersey girl ran up to DJ.
"Here!" Anne Maria held out their mascot.
"I'll take this cute critter from here," DJ took the maggot from her, then turned and ran off down the course.
"Yeah, I got it goin' on," Anne Maria walked back the opposite way...and blindly fell into the gap between platforms, landing with a squelch of mud.
The shot cut to DJ as he ran along his part of the platform. He slammed face-first into a post, then recoiled a few steps. He vigorously shook his head and sidestepped around the post. He only got another two steps before a sudden cannon volley through the floor in front of him forced him to a stop with a yelp.
Now covered in mud, Geoff ran along the first part of the platform with his rat held out in front of him. He jumped the gap, and soon reached Sammy. "We're already far behind! Go!" the party boy held out their team's mascot.
"Got it!" Sammy said, grabbing the rat and running off.
"The Rats take the lead!" Chris called out as Sammy caught up to DJ at the start of the cannonball run. Another cannon fired towards them, forcing both to dart and duck out of the way.
"Okay," Sammy assured herself, "I just have to dodge a bunch of cannons that are impossible to see!" She charged forward, leaving DJ to chase after her.
"Time to try again," DJ added in.
The scene moved to Scott and Molly waiting at the start of the next leg. Sammy ran up and thrust the rat into Scott's arms, panting after she did so.
"Wow. We're in the lead? Great," Scott realized and started to walk slowly. "Nice and slow, all the way to last place. Right, little guy?" He told the rat while walking along the rolling log, but the rat bit him in the chin. He howled painfully and missed the wrecking ball swinging down at him. It caught him and sent him flying, all the way into B.
"Faster, DJ!" Molly yelled as DJ ran up to her and handed over their maggot.
"Good luck," DJ supported Molly as she headed for the rolling logs.
Scott was lying on the floor and petting the rat with B watching as the shot cut back to them.
"Aww, who's my good freak? Who's my good little freak?" Scott faux affectionately talked to the rat in order to slow them down as B was signaling him to pass it to him. "There, there, little guy. Uncle Scotty kept you safe and sound." He saw B waiting. "Oh, do you want this? Why didn't you say so, Beverly?"
Having enough, B took the rat before putting it in his pocket and jumped on to the first precariously isolated platform. It immediately started to wobble and sink, and B quietly cried out in alarm as the camera quick-panned to the base revealing the two mutant beavers making quick work of the pole, causing him to fall down into the mud. He recovered and saw the two ferocious-looking beavers he had landed next to.
Molly was looking up and back just in time to see the wrecking ball swinging towards her. She jumped up, safely grabbing on to the ball and allowing it to carry her forward. She jumped off at the extent of its swing, and sailed further on through the air.
The camera quick-panned over to B as he hastily sculpted a female beaver out of mud. The two beavers looked past the muddy feel and fell in love with it. As they ran over to hug it, B sneakily slipped past.
"And in a surprisingly touching move, B extends the Rats' lead," Chris announced out loud.
Scott was watching from where he landed. "Oh, come on!" he whined in disappointment.
"Go now!" Molly told Scarlett as she handed the maggot over, Scarlett immediately turning.
The beavers stopped hugging the mud sculptured beaver when the head fell off. Realizing that they were tricked, they soon turned vengeful.
Scarlett hopped to the first platform. It immediately wobbled thanks to the beavers gnawing the leg, taking Scarlett down.
"Alright, my brotha!" Leshawna cheered and took the rat from the tired B. "Let me take it from here."
Leshawna threw herself on to the first butt-shaped thing, landed, and bounced off it without a word. She continued on in this way, bouncing from one to the next until eventually she reached the end. "Sierra, take it!" she yelled to her teammate, the fangirl waiting with her back turned at the edge of the next platform.
Despite stretching her rat-holding arms out towards him as she fell, Leshawna was unable to make the pass-off in time before falling completely past her and landing in the mud. "What?" Sierra said as she finally turned around. "Aww. I missed the catch."
The shot cut to Leshawna face down in the mud. The mutant rat scampered out of her grasp. With a growl, Leshawna scrambled to her feet and chased after it screaming "Get back here!"
"Here you go," Scarlett told her teammate as the shot cut back to her holding the muddy and slimy maggot out to him.
"Got it!" Dave said as he reached out for the mutated larva.
It promptly vomited onto his face.
"IT THREW UP ON ME!!!" Dave freaked out and ran while one of the beavers grabbed Scarlett's head and dragged her down.
The perspective briefly changed to show the blurry obstacle that Dave was approaching, then changed back to his head-on close-up as he became visibly determined.
"The quicker I finish this, the quicker I can clean up!" Dave told himself just as he jumped onto the first butt-shaped object; he landed on his chest with a pained yelp and bounced off, continuing on painfully from one bouncy apparatus to the next until eventually he landed on his chest on the far platform with a slam and a groan.
"And Dave takes back the lead for the Maggots!" Chris announced, the camera cutting to him and Chef on their chairs. "He really doesn't like to get messy."
"Alright, it's my turn!" Trent declared confidently, turning proudly towards the end of the course.
"Hurry up!" Dave told him impatiently.
The camera panned back to the left, passing Dave and reaching Sierra just as Leshawna forced their team's mascot into her arms. "Here!" she commanded.
"Sorry I didn't catch it in time," Sierra apologized.
"It's like they say on Blackcomb Mountain. "Best glimpse of heaven's on the way into-" Trent said before reaching the giant mitt and saw how far it was. "Hello."
Meanwhile, Scarlett was in danger courtesy of the two beavers.
"I would ask if you detach from me now," Scarlett begged while a beaver took out a bottle of ketchup and licked their teeth. "I warned you," Scarlett growled before kicking both of their groins, making them moan. "If you had simply not taken me, then I wouldn't have had to resort to kicking you two. I show no sympathy."
Sierra had finally caught up to Trent in the Grand Slam. "This is like the electric eel part of the trust challenge from season one," Sierra talked to herself before grabbing one of the ropes that had been loosely tied there and swung off.
She passed between the baseball bats, and planted her feet on the baseball mitt. Sierra slowly lost her standing and fell into the mud. "Being splattered by mud is better than being electrocuted I guess," she laughed a bit.
Back at the edge of the platform, Trent grabbed the end of the other rope. He unleashed his own terrified cry as he swung blindly through the Grand Slam, and almost made it to the mitt – but slammed into one of the last bats with his legs spread wide. He painfully groaned as he slid down into the mud.
The footage skipped ahead to show a muddy Sierra running up for her second go, the ropes once again tied to a post on the side of the platform. "This time, I should swing higher. Then I'll be on the mitt for sure," the blogger discussed with herself.
"C'mon Sierra!" Geoff called out to her, the shot cutting to show him and the other Rats standing on a nearby platform without the glasses that had been forced on them. "Swing!"
Sierra grabbed one of the ropes again and jumped off. She stuck her legs out in front of her and passed by each bat in turn. However, her muddy hands caused her to fall from the rope just before she reached the mitt and she fell into the mud.
The Rats all groaned.
The camera panned past them and on to Trent, who had grabbed his own rope again and was sizing up his next swing. "My team needs the win," he told himself, tucking the maggot under his arm as he used his fingers to frame his target.
The music turned triumphant as he ran forward and swung off. He hit all the bats, and the peak of his swing put him just about over the mitt. It was then that he let go of the rope and fell down towards the goal, landing on his head as the maggot landed on top of him.
"The Maggots win!" Chris announced, and the maggot mascot threw up on the musician.
The Maggots cheered, having also discarded their glasses, while the five nearby members of the Toxic Rats groaned once more.
"To the Maggots, the spoils," Chris announced as Chef walked over to the winning team holding some kind of gift basket. "McLean Brand Soap, Shampoo, and Conditioner. Guaranteed to wash off the stink!" the host listed over a close-up of the gift basket, showing off its contents against a radiant yellow background.
"I'll definitely keep those in handy!" Dave said with a smile.
"Make sure not to hog all of it," Katie reminded him.
Confessional: Katie
"If my team was up for elimination, I probably would have been the one eliminated, and I wouldn't have my tablet with me. I dodged a bullet there," Katie cheered.
Confessional Ends
"Rats, see you at the elimination ceremony!' Chris added with his usual smile.
The five members of the Rats groaned for a third time. "I could've used the reward to wash off the mess," Leshawna groaned.
Sierra moaned as she got off the muddy floor, coughing up mud in the process. "Losing two times in a row? That's not gonna go well for my blog."
\
The footage flashed ahead to all of the Toxic Rats except for B and Sierra assembled at the steps leading up to their cabin. The camera focused on Scott, who was standing on the ground in front of the others. "All right, guys. Sierra's gotta go. She lost the challenge for us, and she's more focused on using her phone than competing most of the time."
"Now hang on!" Geoff replied. "So she made a mistake and slipped up. We aren't robots. I'm thinking we should give her a second chance."
"Sierra is also a big fan of the show," Sammy said. "Voting her off this early wouldn't be fair to her."
"Fair, smhair," Leshawna muttered. "If eliminating her allows us to sleep without being disturbed by her constant texting to her friends, I'm all for it."
\
The footage flashed ahead again to show the Toxic Rats at the campfire pit, Chef and Chris standing before them with their respective marshmallows.
"Ready?" Chris asked. "Everyone gets a marshmallow, even the loser!" The shot cut to a close-up of the strongbox in Chef's mitted hands. "But that's one marshmallow you do not wanna eat," Chris added as his assistant flipped the lid up and revealed the bright glowing thing inside.
"To the votes! The following people are safe," the host said, picking up the first normal marshmallow off his tray. "Geoff." The party guy caught his prize with a smile.
"Leshawna." The sista sitting next to him was next, satisfied as she caught her marshmallow.
"Scott." The devious, slumped forward, raised his free left hand and caught his prize.
"And Sammy." The nervous cheerleader allowed her marshmallow to fall into her open hands.
"Which leaves, Sierra and Bev," Chris announced, earning a nervous look from both teens.
"What?" Sierra asked in shock.
"And the Marshmallow of Loserdom goes to," Chris said, trailing off as the camera slowly zoomed in on the faces of the bottom two nervous campers.
"Sierra," the host finished.
"Me? But why?" Sierra sputtered in shock while B caught his marshmallow with his mouth.
"Don't know and don't care," Chris said. "You're out."
Sierra dodged the toxic marshmallow thrown her way. "It is what it is, but one last thing!" She whipped out her phone and snapped a photo of her and her teammates, blinding their eyesight and making them audibly yelp. "#ToxicRatsForever!" she enthusiastically claimed and ran to the Hurl of Shame.
\
The footage cut over to the Dock of Shame, the camera zoomed in on Chris and Sierra in the catapult's bucket.
"Any last words before we give you the Hurl of Shame?" Chris asked.
"Of course. Can I have a self-" Sierra said before Chris unflinchingly launched her into the air. Sierra finished with a scream as she disappeared into the night.
Chris laughed. "It was a rhetorical question. Two hurls down, twelve to go! Who will be eliminated next?" he asked the camera. "Tune in, and find out, on Total! Drama! Revenge! Of! The Island!"
(Roll the Credits)
2023.06.03 16:29 xtremexavier15 TSROTI 2 (pt 1)
Toxic Rats: B, Geoff, Scott, Leshawna, Sammy, Sierra
Mutant Maggots: Anne Maria, Katie, Molly, Scarlett, Dave, DJ, Trent
Episode 02: Truth or Mutant Shark
"Last time, on Total Drama Revenge of the Island!" Chris opened over a long-distance shot of Wawanakwa, the recap montage beginning soon after. "Fourteen new competitors were blown away by this year's challenges," the host said as the yacht carrying the new cast was shown, Chris maliciously pressed a button on his remote control, and the yacht blew up. "They were treated to an early-morning swim," Max was shown trying not to drown, "said hello to the island's wildlife," Dave was shown to get nearly zapped by its eye-lasers, "and did some totem-surfing," the Toxic Rats slid down the hill and into the air, falling from their totem just before it crashed into the better cabin and exploded. "Ex-plosive!"
"In the end," a few short clips of Max trying to be villainous, "Max's non-stop claims about being dangerous made him useless enough that his team sent him packing, Hurl of Shame-style." The recap footage ended with Max getting catapulted off the island.
"Who'll go home next?" Chris asked the camera from the end of the dock. "And how much pain can I put them through first? Find out right now, on Total! Drama! Revenge of the Island!"
XXXXX
The episode opened on a shot of the morning sky and a few far-away bird calls as the camera panned down to the two cabins of Camp Wawanakwa.
The shot cut inside to the girls' half of the Rats' cabins where Leshawna and Sammy were woken up to the sound of Sierra texting on her phone.
"The first day competing on Total Drama was exciting," Sierra talked to her phone. "I managed to make some friends and even though my team lost the first challenge, I'm still staying for another day!"
"Girl, who are you even talking to?" Leshawna mumbled tiredly.
"I'm giving the fans an update about my day and experience being a contestant," Sierra mentioned. "The fansite eats up this stuff."
"Are you going to carry your phone everywhere you go just to do so?" Sammy asked.
"I won't use it during the challenges, but I keep it with me at all times," Sierra said. "Without my phone, I'd probably lose my mind!"
Confessional: Sammy
"So I joined the show because my friend group suggested I do so," Sammy timidly said. "They said it's to increase my self-esteem and make me branch out more or something close to those lines."
Confessional Ends
The shot cut abruptly to a top-down view of the other half of the Rats' cabin, showing Geoff and B sleeping in their bunk beds. The sound of a door suddenly slammed open and slammed shut, waking Geoff up.
It was Scott – flat against the front door with his eyes wide, his breath heaving, and his clothes dirty. "Dude, what happened to you?" Geoff asked in concern.
Scott straightened himself out. "Oh, uh... just had an early morning make out session with one of the honeys," he explained.
Geoff got out of his bed in his pajamas and got near Scott. "Why are you so messy then?"
The footage quickly cut to a scene of Scott running in terror from a Woolly Beaver – one with several boney spikes jutting out of its back. The shot flashed back to the Rats' cabin, and Scott added "A gentleman doesn't kiss and tell."
"Wait," Geoff stepped in. "You kissed a guy?" This comment earned him an annoyed expression from Scott.
Confessional: Scott
"All right. I was out looking for that hidden immunity idol, not that they need to know," Scott opened up. "It's all part of my strategy. Let my team lose so the Maggots develop a false sense of security before I pick 'em off!"
He was interrupted by a knock on the wall. "Occupied!" he shouted until the wholly beaver from earlier barged through the wall and frightened Scott into screaming.
Confessional Ends
The camera cut back outside the cabins, zooming on on the Maggots' abode on the right then cutting inside to show Anne Maria brushing and blow drying her hair.
Scarlett walked up behind her from the left carrying a clipboard. "How were you able to sneak those cans in?" she asked.
Anne Maria placed her items inside her pouf. "Easy. I stuck it in my pouf." She noticed the clipboard. "Why are you carryin' that clipboard?"
"I've been working on sleep analysis, Anne Maria," Scarlett answered. "Your stage two sleep spindles were low frequency followed by an intense delta or slow-wave. You slept well."
Anne Maria was a little surprised to hear that. "That's nice, but don't go spyin' on me." She grabbed her hairspray from her pouf and walked away spraying her hair.
Scarlett saw that Katie was still sleeping. "Seems Katie's sleep cycle is lower than I anticipated. Had she not tried to pull an all-nighter, she'd have a higher score," Scarlett spoke to herself.
Confessional: Scarlett
"I have the need to research my teammates and know what their weaknesses and strengths are," Scarlett said. "We were able to achieve victory in the first challenge, and I want to keep it that way."
Confessional Ends
The scene flashed to the boys' side of the cabin, the camera focusing on DJ as he woke up and stretched his arms. "Morning Trent and Dave!" the brickhouse greeted his bunkmates, though Dave wasn't around at the moment. "Where'd Dave go?"
Trent, who had also woken up, shrugged. "Beats me. He probably went to the bathroom."
Confessional: Trent
"This is my first time sleeping in a cabin," Trent confessed with his guitar on his lap. "It was hard trying to fall asleep, so I played some songs that were guaranteed to make me and the guys drift off… at least that's what my friends back home say."
"Anyway, my bunk mates are pretty cool. Dave's a bit neurotic, and DJ's more soft-spoken, but once I get to know them more, I can guarantee you we'll be best buds."
Confessional Ends
The scene cut to the back of the Maggots' cabin where Molly got out of a tent that she pitched.
Confessional: Molly
"I don't like bunk beds," Molly admitted with a shrug. "They tend to break no matter how stable it is. That's why I decided to sleep outside. Besides, I wanted to have a camping experience, and sleeping in a tent is the first way to go."
Confessional Ends
The footage returned to Molly stretching her body, and a few seconds later, Dave walked up to her. "Did you sleep outside of your cabin?"
"Yep," Molly nodded.
"Do you know the negatives of doing that?" Dave crossed his arms.
"I don't think so," Molly shook her head.
"You could get bug bites or get sick," Dave explained to the indie woman.
"I already planned for that," Molly laughed. "Ever heard of bug spray and sleeping bags?"
"I know those things, but why did you sleep outside?" Dave wondered.
"One, I prefer to sleep by myself, and two, I don't like sleeping indoors," Molly gives the germaphobe answers. "I hate following the crowd."
"Okay then," Dave said. "I'm gonna use the bathroom. Are you coming?"
"I'm already prepared," Molly took out toothpaste and a toothbrush.
\
The scene cut to a seagull sleeping in a nest inside the horn of a loudspeaker. A blow horn sounded through it without warning, though, forcing the bird out into the air and revealing its snake-like features as it fell.
"Up and at 'em my little morning glories!" Chris called out, sitting on his ATV below. "It's time for today's challenge!" he announced, the camera moving behind him to show the two teams assembled in front, their respective logos appearing on the screen overhead.
"What?" Sierra asked in shock. "But we haven't even had breakfast yet!"
"Not a problem for me," Molly brushed it off and swallowed a pickle. "I packed enough pickles for me to be full."
"And we haven't had enough sleep," Katie added.
"Cognitive function is dependent on REM sleep," Scarlett acknowledged the host.
"You can catch up on your sleep after the challenge," Chris told them. "Rrright this way, to the Bay of Dismay!"
The thirteen campers groaned, except for Katie, who pulled out her tablet.
"Hey viewers! I'm gonna be at a Bay of Dismay," Katie started to film herself until Chris used a magnet to take her tablet away. "What the?"
"Contraband! Now it's mine! Confiscator's keepers! Come on! Your humiliation awaits!" Chris told a miserable Katie.
\
The scene flashed ahead to the thirteen campers walking along at an even pace. "'Bay of Dismay'?" Trent told Anne Maria as they walked side-by-side. "That doesn't sound depressing at all."
"If Chris is gonna make us fight against alligators," Anne Maria said. "I'm planning on suing him after the show ends for breaking my nails."
Trent frowned, but chose to ignore it.
The camera lingered a few seconds as they walked off, long enough for DJ and Katie to enter the shot together. "So, what kinda challenge do you think Chris is gonna put us through this time?" DJ asked.
"I don't know," Katie answered without looking at him, "but I hope it's one that requires the use of a camera so I can take pictures with it, you know?"
DJ facepalmed, unseen by the influencer.
Confessional: Katie
"It's been four minutes, and I'm already missing my tablet," Katie squeaked out and huddled herself. "How will my viewers know what I'm doing right now?"
Confessional Ends
DJ decided to make Katie happy. "Maybe when the challenge is over, you could get your tablet back."
"Emphasis on maybe," Katie snarked.
"I don't know if this is going to be another physical challenge," Leshawna said to Sierra as the footage cut to the two of them walking together. "We already struggled getting that totem down last challenge."
"Chris probably has an academic challenge planned for us at the Bay of Dismay," Sierra told her as they walked forward, "and I know Chris isn't lying."
"How do you know Chris isn't frontin' us?" Leshawna asked.
"Basic knowledge," Sierra bragged. "I can tell if he's lying to us by his vocal pitch and body language."
"So you really studied the show and how it works, huh?" Leshawna followed up in surprise.
"Of course I have," Sierra said. "I've seen every episode like fifty-three times and auditioned twice before being accepted the second time."
B and Scarlett were now shown walking together. "Any idea on what we'll be facing up against?" the quiet brainiac asked the similarly intelligent boy, who didn't talk back to her. "I can see that you prefer not to vocalize your sentences like me, but you're more exaggerated."
Confessional: B
B simply shrugged in the confessional.
Confessional Ends
The static cut away to the body of water that was, presumably, the Bay of Dismay. Three structures rose out of its waters: on the left and right were two-tiered game-show-like seats that housed the Toxic Rats and Mutant Maggots respectively and bore their logos on the front; and in the middle was a single Greek pedestal upon which Chris stood in his blue tuxedo below a large video screen and electronic scoreboard.
"Welcome to the 'Getting to Know You' Trivia Game Challenge," Chris introduced. "Everyone strapped in all nice and snug?" he asked the contestants.
"Too snug," Scott answered irritably. "It's cutting into my shoulders!"
"Yeah, children's size harnesses will do that," Chris chuckled. "I'll be asking our players embarrassing personal questions," he explained, "and I mean majorly humiliating. If the player I'm talking about hits the poorly-wired buzzer and owns their humiliation before the time runs out," he continued as the shot cut back to Scott looking at the red buzzer on the counter in front of him, the camera zooming out to show Sierra on the left, Sammy on the right, and B, Leshawna, and Geoff on the back row, "their team gets a point." The camera panned across the Maggots, showing DJ, Molly, and Scarlett in the bottom row and Katie, Anne Maria, Dave, and Trent above. "First team to five wins part one, and a distinct advantage in part two."
"Buuut," Chris added as the shot cut back to him, "if no one owns up, this happens!" He took out his remote, pressed the button, and with a mechanical whir the elevated stand the Maggots were seated in suddenly dropped into the bay. The shot cut to the seven holding their breaths below the water, focusing in on DJ in particular. He looked around and screamed when he saw the large mutant shark with arms and legs looking at him hungrily, and his teammates joined in as the shark reared back to take a bite – but the stand rose back up just in time to take the teens away from danger.
The shot cut back to the surface as the Maggots re-emerged, dripping and coughing and generally frantic. "There's some kind of two-legged shark down there!" Anne Maria told the host in a panic.
"You mean Fang?" Chris asked with a broad smile and quick laugh. "Yeah, it turns out toxic waste can mess with stuff underwater too." He pointed up at the screen above him as he spoke, and the camera panned up to show a seemingly ordinary shark drinking a cup of tea on a wooden post underwater...until the screen flashed, and a picture of Fang against a simple teal background replaced the normal shark. "Who knew?"
"Better them than us," Scott said from the Rats' stand.
"Anywho," Chris continued slowly, "if a team gets dunked, their opponents can steal by guessing which dunk-ee is guilty. Guess right, and you get a point. Guess wrong, and this happens." With a sly look he pressed the button on his remote again, and this time it was the Rats who got plunged into the bay. Fang was shown tying a bib around his neck, then looking behind him just as the fresh set of teenagers came into view. He turned around and opened his mouth to bite, and with the muffled screams being heard the shot cut back to the bubbling surface. Chris pressed the button once more, and the Toxic Rats rocketed back up on their stand.
"Now that we understand the rules," Chris told them as they coughed up water, "let's start the game!" The host pulled a notecard out from behind his back. "To the Rats, now listen carefully," he began. "Who does this," he motioned upward to a picture of a question mark, "if they eat or drink any form of dairy?" the question mark farted.
All members of the Mutant Maggots began to laugh, as did the members of the Toxic Rats – all except Leshawna, who seemed to shrink in her seat as the camera zoomed in on her. "Where did you get that?" the sista asked in her embarrassment, pressing her buzzer and yelping at the shock she received.
The shot cut to the scoreboard, the Rats' half changing from 0 to 1.
The camera moved back to Chris and his card, now turned towards the Maggots. "Who sleeps with a teddy bear," he motioned upward to a picture of a brown teddy bear, "even after they turned 13?"
"Really? I thought we were more grown-up than that," Dave cringed at the fact.
Scarlett saw that DJ was feeling embarrassed. "Push the button, DJ! You're clearly harboring some guilt," Scarlett advised.
As the timer continued ticking, DJ finally shuddered, then slammed his right hand down on her buzzer. "Alright then," he declared after getting shocked, "it's me."
A bit of light laughter came from the Rats, and the scoreboard updated to show the Maggots' first point. "And it's one-all!" the host declared, earning a cheer from the Maggots.
"Aww, thanks DJ," Katie whispered to the drooping brickhouse. "I know that must've been hard, and I don't hold it against you."
"Really?" DJ regained his smile.
"I have my own collection of teddy bears in my room," Katie beamed.
Confessional: DJ
"Liking teddy bears is one thing me and Katie have in common," DJ smiled in the outhouse. "We'd have to get to know each other a bit more."
Confessional End
"Rats," Chris turned back to the other team, "whose first name is really Beverly?"
"That's not embarrassing," Trent called out defensively. "None of us will throw a fuss over a girl's name being Beverly."
Over to the Rats, Sierra was looking at a picture of Chris, Sammy was shrugging to signify it wasn't her, and Leshawna was just waiting for someone to buzz in.
B, on the other hand, looked down at his own buzzed timidly, and after some consideration, he pressed the buzzer and got shocked, raising his hand to let Chris know that he owned up to the question.
"Correct, Beverly," Chris teased the strong, silent genius. "Rats get the point, but I would've preferred a verbal response."
"But B is as quiet as a snail," Geoff piped up. "And we still got the point."
"Don't care," Chris said apathetically. "So, as a quick punishment." He smiled as he pushed the button on his remote again.
The Rats were plunged back into the water, and the camera focused on Scott as he hollered before getting chomped up by Fang, the stand rising back up as Fang struggled to close his jaws.
Scott managed to get out of Fang's mouth, shouting "No! Wait for me!" as he swam back to her seat.
Confessional: Scott
Scott winced in the confessional, pulling something white out of his butt. "What the? A shark tooth?" he asked, looking at what was obviously a shark's tooth.
Confessional: Fang
The next to use the confessional was none other than Fang, examining his mouth in a hand mirror with great concern. Upon noticing the gap in his upper row of sharp teeth, he growled angrily and snapped the mirror.
Confessionals End
Scott furiously climbed back into his seat. "Thanks for leaving me down there, team!" Scott scolded his teammates. "You can win this stupid challenge without me!"
"If he's not playing, then I'm not either," Anne Maria chimed in, the shot zooming back out as she and the other Maggots looked towards the host.
"I've already had a secret about me exposed, so I think I'll be leavin'," Leshawna declared.
"Okay, everyone just settle down," Chris told them all sternly.
"I'm with everyone else. We should stop," Molly said, standing up and trying to undo her harness. "I do not want any secrets of mine to be spilled out."
"You can do so after you've had a secret revealed," Scarlett snapped.
"Hey! Host talking here!" Chris barked. "I decide when the challenge is over."
"Whatever," Scott scoffed, having already removed his harness. "I'm out of here."
"Not until we win," Sierra held the dirt farmer back from leaving. "I am not going to have us lose."
Just then, Fang jumped out of the water and took a large bite out of the Maggots' stand, forcing them to yelp.
"Now would be a good time to leave," Sammy remarked and tried to get herself out of her straps.
The shot cut back to the Maggots as Anne Maria and Scarlett began to argue with Dave and Molly and DJ, Katie, and Trent watched the debacle going on.
Eventually, the shot cut back to Chris as he finally shouted "Alright! SHUT IT!" The off-screen arguments promptly ceased. "Thanks to that pathetic digression," he said in annoyance, glancing at his watch, "now we don't have enough time to finish this challenge! Happy?"
The Rats voiced their agreement. Likewise, all the Maggots agreed happily.
"Well you won't be happy for long," Chris told them and the camera with a smile. "Come back after the break for an all-new challenge from which there is no escape. And in the meantime," he added slyly as he took his remote back out and pushed the button, causing both teams to be dunked into the bay with a scream once more.
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(Commercial Break)
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Mutant Maggots: Anne Maria, Katie, Molly, Scarlett, Dave, DJ, Trent
Episode 02: Truth or Mutant Shark
"Last time, on Total Drama Revenge of the Island!" Chris opened over a long-distance shot of Wawanakwa, the recap montage beginning soon after. "Fourteen new competitors were blown away by this year's challenges," the host said as the yacht carrying the new cast was shown, Chris maliciously pressed a button on his remote control, and the yacht blew up. "They were treated to an early-morning swim," Max was shown trying not to drown, "said hello to the island's wildlife," Dave was shown to get nearly zapped by its eye-lasers, "and did some totem-surfing," the Toxic Rats slid down the hill and into the air, falling from their totem just before it crashed into the better cabin and exploded. "Ex-plosive!"
"In the end," a few short clips of Max trying to be villainous, "Max's non-stop claims about being dangerous made him useless enough that his team sent him packing, Hurl of Shame-style." The recap footage ended with Max getting catapulted off the island.
"Who'll go home next?" Chris asked the camera from the end of the dock. "And how much pain can I put them through first? Find out right now, on Total! Drama! Revenge of the Island!"
XXXXX
The episode opened on a shot of the morning sky and a few far-away bird calls as the camera panned down to the two cabins of Camp Wawanakwa.
The shot cut inside to the girls' half of the Rats' cabins where Leshawna and Sammy were woken up to the sound of Sierra texting on her phone.
"The first day competing on Total Drama was exciting," Sierra talked to her phone. "I managed to make some friends and even though my team lost the first challenge, I'm still staying for another day!"
"Girl, who are you even talking to?" Leshawna mumbled tiredly.
"I'm giving the fans an update about my day and experience being a contestant," Sierra mentioned. "The fansite eats up this stuff."
"Are you going to carry your phone everywhere you go just to do so?" Sammy asked.
"I won't use it during the challenges, but I keep it with me at all times," Sierra said. "Without my phone, I'd probably lose my mind!"
Confessional: Sammy
"So I joined the show because my friend group suggested I do so," Sammy timidly said. "They said it's to increase my self-esteem and make me branch out more or something close to those lines."
Confessional Ends
The shot cut abruptly to a top-down view of the other half of the Rats' cabin, showing Geoff and B sleeping in their bunk beds. The sound of a door suddenly slammed open and slammed shut, waking Geoff up.
It was Scott – flat against the front door with his eyes wide, his breath heaving, and his clothes dirty. "Dude, what happened to you?" Geoff asked in concern.
Scott straightened himself out. "Oh, uh... just had an early morning make out session with one of the honeys," he explained.
Geoff got out of his bed in his pajamas and got near Scott. "Why are you so messy then?"
The footage quickly cut to a scene of Scott running in terror from a Woolly Beaver – one with several boney spikes jutting out of its back. The shot flashed back to the Rats' cabin, and Scott added "A gentleman doesn't kiss and tell."
"Wait," Geoff stepped in. "You kissed a guy?" This comment earned him an annoyed expression from Scott.
Confessional: Scott
"All right. I was out looking for that hidden immunity idol, not that they need to know," Scott opened up. "It's all part of my strategy. Let my team lose so the Maggots develop a false sense of security before I pick 'em off!"
He was interrupted by a knock on the wall. "Occupied!" he shouted until the wholly beaver from earlier barged through the wall and frightened Scott into screaming.
Confessional Ends
The camera cut back outside the cabins, zooming on on the Maggots' abode on the right then cutting inside to show Anne Maria brushing and blow drying her hair.
Scarlett walked up behind her from the left carrying a clipboard. "How were you able to sneak those cans in?" she asked.
Anne Maria placed her items inside her pouf. "Easy. I stuck it in my pouf." She noticed the clipboard. "Why are you carryin' that clipboard?"
"I've been working on sleep analysis, Anne Maria," Scarlett answered. "Your stage two sleep spindles were low frequency followed by an intense delta or slow-wave. You slept well."
Anne Maria was a little surprised to hear that. "That's nice, but don't go spyin' on me." She grabbed her hairspray from her pouf and walked away spraying her hair.
Scarlett saw that Katie was still sleeping. "Seems Katie's sleep cycle is lower than I anticipated. Had she not tried to pull an all-nighter, she'd have a higher score," Scarlett spoke to herself.
Confessional: Scarlett
"I have the need to research my teammates and know what their weaknesses and strengths are," Scarlett said. "We were able to achieve victory in the first challenge, and I want to keep it that way."
Confessional Ends
The scene flashed to the boys' side of the cabin, the camera focusing on DJ as he woke up and stretched his arms. "Morning Trent and Dave!" the brickhouse greeted his bunkmates, though Dave wasn't around at the moment. "Where'd Dave go?"
Trent, who had also woken up, shrugged. "Beats me. He probably went to the bathroom."
Confessional: Trent
"This is my first time sleeping in a cabin," Trent confessed with his guitar on his lap. "It was hard trying to fall asleep, so I played some songs that were guaranteed to make me and the guys drift off… at least that's what my friends back home say."
"Anyway, my bunk mates are pretty cool. Dave's a bit neurotic, and DJ's more soft-spoken, but once I get to know them more, I can guarantee you we'll be best buds."
Confessional Ends
The scene cut to the back of the Maggots' cabin where Molly got out of a tent that she pitched.
Confessional: Molly
"I don't like bunk beds," Molly admitted with a shrug. "They tend to break no matter how stable it is. That's why I decided to sleep outside. Besides, I wanted to have a camping experience, and sleeping in a tent is the first way to go."
Confessional Ends
The footage returned to Molly stretching her body, and a few seconds later, Dave walked up to her. "Did you sleep outside of your cabin?"
"Yep," Molly nodded.
"Do you know the negatives of doing that?" Dave crossed his arms.
"I don't think so," Molly shook her head.
"You could get bug bites or get sick," Dave explained to the indie woman.
"I already planned for that," Molly laughed. "Ever heard of bug spray and sleeping bags?"
"I know those things, but why did you sleep outside?" Dave wondered.
"One, I prefer to sleep by myself, and two, I don't like sleeping indoors," Molly gives the germaphobe answers. "I hate following the crowd."
"Okay then," Dave said. "I'm gonna use the bathroom. Are you coming?"
"I'm already prepared," Molly took out toothpaste and a toothbrush.
\
The scene cut to a seagull sleeping in a nest inside the horn of a loudspeaker. A blow horn sounded through it without warning, though, forcing the bird out into the air and revealing its snake-like features as it fell.
"Up and at 'em my little morning glories!" Chris called out, sitting on his ATV below. "It's time for today's challenge!" he announced, the camera moving behind him to show the two teams assembled in front, their respective logos appearing on the screen overhead.
"What?" Sierra asked in shock. "But we haven't even had breakfast yet!"
"Not a problem for me," Molly brushed it off and swallowed a pickle. "I packed enough pickles for me to be full."
"And we haven't had enough sleep," Katie added.
"Cognitive function is dependent on REM sleep," Scarlett acknowledged the host.
"You can catch up on your sleep after the challenge," Chris told them. "Rrright this way, to the Bay of Dismay!"
The thirteen campers groaned, except for Katie, who pulled out her tablet.
"Hey viewers! I'm gonna be at a Bay of Dismay," Katie started to film herself until Chris used a magnet to take her tablet away. "What the?"
"Contraband! Now it's mine! Confiscator's keepers! Come on! Your humiliation awaits!" Chris told a miserable Katie.
\
The scene flashed ahead to the thirteen campers walking along at an even pace. "'Bay of Dismay'?" Trent told Anne Maria as they walked side-by-side. "That doesn't sound depressing at all."
"If Chris is gonna make us fight against alligators," Anne Maria said. "I'm planning on suing him after the show ends for breaking my nails."
Trent frowned, but chose to ignore it.
The camera lingered a few seconds as they walked off, long enough for DJ and Katie to enter the shot together. "So, what kinda challenge do you think Chris is gonna put us through this time?" DJ asked.
"I don't know," Katie answered without looking at him, "but I hope it's one that requires the use of a camera so I can take pictures with it, you know?"
DJ facepalmed, unseen by the influencer.
Confessional: Katie
"It's been four minutes, and I'm already missing my tablet," Katie squeaked out and huddled herself. "How will my viewers know what I'm doing right now?"
Confessional Ends
DJ decided to make Katie happy. "Maybe when the challenge is over, you could get your tablet back."
"Emphasis on maybe," Katie snarked.
"I don't know if this is going to be another physical challenge," Leshawna said to Sierra as the footage cut to the two of them walking together. "We already struggled getting that totem down last challenge."
"Chris probably has an academic challenge planned for us at the Bay of Dismay," Sierra told her as they walked forward, "and I know Chris isn't lying."
"How do you know Chris isn't frontin' us?" Leshawna asked.
"Basic knowledge," Sierra bragged. "I can tell if he's lying to us by his vocal pitch and body language."
"So you really studied the show and how it works, huh?" Leshawna followed up in surprise.
"Of course I have," Sierra said. "I've seen every episode like fifty-three times and auditioned twice before being accepted the second time."
B and Scarlett were now shown walking together. "Any idea on what we'll be facing up against?" the quiet brainiac asked the similarly intelligent boy, who didn't talk back to her. "I can see that you prefer not to vocalize your sentences like me, but you're more exaggerated."
Confessional: B
B simply shrugged in the confessional.
Confessional Ends
The static cut away to the body of water that was, presumably, the Bay of Dismay. Three structures rose out of its waters: on the left and right were two-tiered game-show-like seats that housed the Toxic Rats and Mutant Maggots respectively and bore their logos on the front; and in the middle was a single Greek pedestal upon which Chris stood in his blue tuxedo below a large video screen and electronic scoreboard.
"Welcome to the 'Getting to Know You' Trivia Game Challenge," Chris introduced. "Everyone strapped in all nice and snug?" he asked the contestants.
"Too snug," Scott answered irritably. "It's cutting into my shoulders!"
"Yeah, children's size harnesses will do that," Chris chuckled. "I'll be asking our players embarrassing personal questions," he explained, "and I mean majorly humiliating. If the player I'm talking about hits the poorly-wired buzzer and owns their humiliation before the time runs out," he continued as the shot cut back to Scott looking at the red buzzer on the counter in front of him, the camera zooming out to show Sierra on the left, Sammy on the right, and B, Leshawna, and Geoff on the back row, "their team gets a point." The camera panned across the Maggots, showing DJ, Molly, and Scarlett in the bottom row and Katie, Anne Maria, Dave, and Trent above. "First team to five wins part one, and a distinct advantage in part two."
"Buuut," Chris added as the shot cut back to him, "if no one owns up, this happens!" He took out his remote, pressed the button, and with a mechanical whir the elevated stand the Maggots were seated in suddenly dropped into the bay. The shot cut to the seven holding their breaths below the water, focusing in on DJ in particular. He looked around and screamed when he saw the large mutant shark with arms and legs looking at him hungrily, and his teammates joined in as the shark reared back to take a bite – but the stand rose back up just in time to take the teens away from danger.
The shot cut back to the surface as the Maggots re-emerged, dripping and coughing and generally frantic. "There's some kind of two-legged shark down there!" Anne Maria told the host in a panic.
"You mean Fang?" Chris asked with a broad smile and quick laugh. "Yeah, it turns out toxic waste can mess with stuff underwater too." He pointed up at the screen above him as he spoke, and the camera panned up to show a seemingly ordinary shark drinking a cup of tea on a wooden post underwater...until the screen flashed, and a picture of Fang against a simple teal background replaced the normal shark. "Who knew?"
"Better them than us," Scott said from the Rats' stand.
"Anywho," Chris continued slowly, "if a team gets dunked, their opponents can steal by guessing which dunk-ee is guilty. Guess right, and you get a point. Guess wrong, and this happens." With a sly look he pressed the button on his remote again, and this time it was the Rats who got plunged into the bay. Fang was shown tying a bib around his neck, then looking behind him just as the fresh set of teenagers came into view. He turned around and opened his mouth to bite, and with the muffled screams being heard the shot cut back to the bubbling surface. Chris pressed the button once more, and the Toxic Rats rocketed back up on their stand.
"Now that we understand the rules," Chris told them as they coughed up water, "let's start the game!" The host pulled a notecard out from behind his back. "To the Rats, now listen carefully," he began. "Who does this," he motioned upward to a picture of a question mark, "if they eat or drink any form of dairy?" the question mark farted.
All members of the Mutant Maggots began to laugh, as did the members of the Toxic Rats – all except Leshawna, who seemed to shrink in her seat as the camera zoomed in on her. "Where did you get that?" the sista asked in her embarrassment, pressing her buzzer and yelping at the shock she received.
The shot cut to the scoreboard, the Rats' half changing from 0 to 1.
The camera moved back to Chris and his card, now turned towards the Maggots. "Who sleeps with a teddy bear," he motioned upward to a picture of a brown teddy bear, "even after they turned 13?"
"Really? I thought we were more grown-up than that," Dave cringed at the fact.
Scarlett saw that DJ was feeling embarrassed. "Push the button, DJ! You're clearly harboring some guilt," Scarlett advised.
As the timer continued ticking, DJ finally shuddered, then slammed his right hand down on her buzzer. "Alright then," he declared after getting shocked, "it's me."
A bit of light laughter came from the Rats, and the scoreboard updated to show the Maggots' first point. "And it's one-all!" the host declared, earning a cheer from the Maggots.
"Aww, thanks DJ," Katie whispered to the drooping brickhouse. "I know that must've been hard, and I don't hold it against you."
"Really?" DJ regained his smile.
"I have my own collection of teddy bears in my room," Katie beamed.
Confessional: DJ
"Liking teddy bears is one thing me and Katie have in common," DJ smiled in the outhouse. "We'd have to get to know each other a bit more."
Confessional End
"Rats," Chris turned back to the other team, "whose first name is really Beverly?"
"That's not embarrassing," Trent called out defensively. "None of us will throw a fuss over a girl's name being Beverly."
Over to the Rats, Sierra was looking at a picture of Chris, Sammy was shrugging to signify it wasn't her, and Leshawna was just waiting for someone to buzz in.
B, on the other hand, looked down at his own buzzed timidly, and after some consideration, he pressed the buzzer and got shocked, raising his hand to let Chris know that he owned up to the question.
"Correct, Beverly," Chris teased the strong, silent genius. "Rats get the point, but I would've preferred a verbal response."
"But B is as quiet as a snail," Geoff piped up. "And we still got the point."
"Don't care," Chris said apathetically. "So, as a quick punishment." He smiled as he pushed the button on his remote again.
The Rats were plunged back into the water, and the camera focused on Scott as he hollered before getting chomped up by Fang, the stand rising back up as Fang struggled to close his jaws.
Scott managed to get out of Fang's mouth, shouting "No! Wait for me!" as he swam back to her seat.
Confessional: Scott
Scott winced in the confessional, pulling something white out of his butt. "What the? A shark tooth?" he asked, looking at what was obviously a shark's tooth.
Confessional: Fang
The next to use the confessional was none other than Fang, examining his mouth in a hand mirror with great concern. Upon noticing the gap in his upper row of sharp teeth, he growled angrily and snapped the mirror.
Confessionals End
Scott furiously climbed back into his seat. "Thanks for leaving me down there, team!" Scott scolded his teammates. "You can win this stupid challenge without me!"
"If he's not playing, then I'm not either," Anne Maria chimed in, the shot zooming back out as she and the other Maggots looked towards the host.
"I've already had a secret about me exposed, so I think I'll be leavin'," Leshawna declared.
"Okay, everyone just settle down," Chris told them all sternly.
"I'm with everyone else. We should stop," Molly said, standing up and trying to undo her harness. "I do not want any secrets of mine to be spilled out."
"You can do so after you've had a secret revealed," Scarlett snapped.
"Hey! Host talking here!" Chris barked. "I decide when the challenge is over."
"Whatever," Scott scoffed, having already removed his harness. "I'm out of here."
"Not until we win," Sierra held the dirt farmer back from leaving. "I am not going to have us lose."
Just then, Fang jumped out of the water and took a large bite out of the Maggots' stand, forcing them to yelp.
"Now would be a good time to leave," Sammy remarked and tried to get herself out of her straps.
The shot cut back to the Maggots as Anne Maria and Scarlett began to argue with Dave and Molly and DJ, Katie, and Trent watched the debacle going on.
Eventually, the shot cut back to Chris as he finally shouted "Alright! SHUT IT!" The off-screen arguments promptly ceased. "Thanks to that pathetic digression," he said in annoyance, glancing at his watch, "now we don't have enough time to finish this challenge! Happy?"
The Rats voiced their agreement. Likewise, all the Maggots agreed happily.
"Well you won't be happy for long," Chris told them and the camera with a smile. "Come back after the break for an all-new challenge from which there is no escape. And in the meantime," he added slyly as he took his remote back out and pushed the button, causing both teams to be dunked into the bay with a scream once more.
\
(Commercial Break)
\
2023.06.03 15:52 SportsThreadderBot Match Thread: Manchester City vs Manchester United FA Cup
FT: Manchester City 2 - 1 Manchester United
Manchester City scorers: Ilkay Gundogan (1'), Ilkay Gundogan (51')Manchester United scorers: Bruno Fernandes (33')
Manchester City
Stefan Ortega, Erling Haaland, Jack Grealish, Ilkay Gundogan, Kevin De Bruyne, Bernardo Silva, Manuel Akanji, Ruben Dias, Kyle Walker, Rodri, John Stones
Subs: Ederson, Kalvin Phillips, Nathan Ake, Aymeric Laporte, Julian Alvarez, Riyad Mahrez, Phil Foden, Cole Palmer, Rico Lewis
________________
Manchester United
David De Gea, Marcus Rashford, Jadon Sancho, Christian Eriksen, Bruno Fernandes, Fred, Casemiro, Luke Shaw, Raphael Varane, Victor Lindelof, Aaron Wan-Bissaka
Subs: Jack Butland, Diogo Dalot, Harry Maguire, Tyrell Malacia, Scott Mctominay, Facundo Pellistri, Anthony Elanga, Alejandro Garnacho, Wout Weghorst
1' Goal! Man City have got their heads in front thanks to a Ilkay Gundogan strike. Kevin De Bruyne instrumental with a fine assist.
4' Can Man City capitalize from this dangerous free kick?
4' Paul Tierney awards Man Utd a goal kick.
5' Man Utd advance rapidly upfield but Paul Tierney blows for offside.
6' Man City are pushing forward but Jack Grealish's finish is wide of the goal.
7' Paul Tierney signals a Man Utd throw-in in Man City's half.
7' Throw-in Man City.
7' Can Man Utd get the ball into an attacking position from this throw-in in Man City's half?
9' Paul Tierney signals a free kick to Man City in their own half.
10' Ball goes out of play for a Man Utd goal kick.
12' Paul Tierney signals a free kick to Man Utd.
13' Man City have a goal kick.
16' Free kick Man City.
17' Man City pushes forward through Erling Haaland, whose finish on goal is saved.
18' Man Utd awarded a free kick in their own half.
19' Man Utd to take a throw-in in Man City territory.
20' Paul Tierney signals a free kick to Man City in their own half.
21' Erling Haaland of Man City gets in a strike, but is off target.
21' Ball goes out of play for a Man Utd goal kick.
23' Man City have a goal kick.
24' Marcus Rashford (Man Utd) is first to the ball but his header is off-target.
24' Paul Tierney awards Man City a goal kick.
27' Paul Tierney signals a Man City throw-in in Man Utd's half.
28' Man City's Kevin De Bruyne misses with an attempt on goal.
33' The match is now all square at 1-1 thanks to a penalty from Bruno Fernandes.
35' Man Utd have a goal kick.
35' Ball safe as Man City is awarded a throw-in in their half.
36' Can Man City get the ball into an attacking position from this throw-in in Man Utd's half?
36' Man City have a dangerous throw-in.
37' Man City to take a throw-in in Man Utd territory.
38' Corner awarded to Man City.
40' Man Utd awarded a free kick in their own half.
42' Man Utd have been awarded a corner by Paul Tierney.
42' Man Utd are coming forward and Raphael Varane gets in a strike, it misses the target, however.
44' Man Utd awarded a free kick in their own half.
44' Throw-in for Man Utd close to the penalty box.
45+1' Paul Tierney signals a free kick to Man Utd in their own half.
45+2' Man City needs to be cautious. Man Utd have an attacking throw-in.
45+3' Man Utd to take a throw-in in Man City territory.
45+3' Paul Tierney signals a free kick to Man City in their own half.
45+4' Paul Tierney signals a free kick to Man City.
45+4' Aaron Wan-Bissaka for Man Utd has been booked by Paul Tierney and receives a first yellow card.
46' Throw-in for Man Utd in their own half.
48' Man City awarded a throw-in in their own half.
50' Free kick in a good position for Man City!
51' Great play from Kevin De Bruyne to set up the goal.
53' Man Utd awarded a throw-in in their own half.
54' Paul Tierney signals a throw-in for Man Utd, close to Man City's area.
55' Free kick Man City.
57' Man City have been awarded a corner by Paul Tierney.
59' Can Man City capitalize from this throw-in deep inside Man Utd's half?
60' Can Man City get the ball into an attacking position from this throw-in in Man Utd's half?
60' Paul Tierney signals a Man City throw-in in Man Utd's half.
62' Kevin De Bruyne of Man City smashes in a shot on target. The keeper saves, though.
62' Man Utd awarded a free kick in their own half.
63' Throw-in for Man Utd in their own half.
64' John Stones of Man City gets in a strike, but is off target.
64' Paul Tierney awards Man Utd a goal kick.
66' Man Utd awarded a free kick in their own half.
69' Man Utd's Marcus Rashford gets his shot away but it misses the target.
69' Ball goes out of play for a Man City goal kick.
70' Throw-in Man Utd.
71' Paul Tierney blows against Man City's Ilkay Gundogan for offside.
72' Man Utd are coming forward and Alejandro Garnacho gets in a strike, it misses the target, however.
72' Man City have a goal kick.
74' Corner awarded to Man Utd.
76' Paul Tierney signals a free kick to Man City in their own half.
76' Pep Guardiola (Man City) is making a first substitution, with Phil Foden replacing Kevin De Bruyne.
77' Man City to take a throw-in in Man Utd territory.
78' Man Utd awarded a free kick in their own half.
79' Free kick Man City.
79' Fred (Man Utd) has received a first yellow card.
81' Stefan Ortega (Man City) has been booked and must now be careful not to get a second yellow card.
81' Can Man City get the ball into an attacking position from this throw-in in Man Utd's half?
82' Paul Tierney signals a free kick to Man City.
82' Ball goes out of play for a Man Utd goal kick.
83' Man Utd are too eager and fall into an offside trap.
83' Man City's Erling Haaland misses with an attempt on goal.
83' Paul Tierney awards Man Utd a goal kick.
84' Throw-in for Man Utd close to the penalty box.
85' Ball safe as Man Utd is awarded a throw-in in their half.
86' Man City have a goal kick.
86' Paul Tierney signals a free kick to Man Utd in their own half.
89' Man Utd needs to be cautious. Man City have an attacking throw-in.
90' Man City make their second substitution with Nathan Ake replacing Jack Grealish.
90' Rodri (Man City) gets a yellow card.
90' Man Utd awarded a free kick in their own half.
90+1' Paul Tierney signals a free kick to Man Utd in their own half.
90+3' Man Utd have been awarded a corner by Paul Tierney.
90+3' Can Man Utd capitalize from this throw-in deep inside Man City's half?
90+3' Man City awarded a throw-in in their own half.
90+4' Attention is being given to Man City’s Kyle Walker and play has been suspended briefly.
90+5' Pep Guardiola (Man City) is making a third change, with Aymeric Laporte replacing the possibly injured Kyle Walker.
90+6' Corner awarded to Man City.
90+6' Paul Tierney signals a Man City throw-in in Man Utd's half.
2023.06.03 15:47 HopeTroll Boulder Crime Coverage 1996 and old Article - Boulder's safe but lock your doors
 | The Ramseys have been accused of being naive. submitted by HopeTroll to JonBenet [link] [comments] Based on perusing 1996-era local periodicals, crimes were not being reported on unless the victim was murdered. Otherwise, the crime would only be reported on once someone was being tried for it. I'd find an article about someone being tried for intruder sa, then I'd work backwards to try to find the article that notified the community of the crime and couldn't find anything. If no one was tried for the crime of sa, it might never be reported on. Amy's mother had the pepper spray which scared off Amy's attacker, due to JonBenet's murder. (btw, pepper sprayed and jumping off the 2nd storey in the dark, he definitely got injured, not that he sought medical treatment for it.) I found a 1985 article indicating Boulder was safe, if you locked your doors. https://www.coloradohistoricnewspapers.org/?a=d&d=OWL19851031-01.2.11&srpos=1&e=-------en-20--1--img-txIN%7ctxCO%7ctxTA-%22Be+aware%3b+violence%22-------2------ Be aware; violence does exist in Boulder Violent crime in Boulder seems like a rare or non-existent occurrence. The truth is that violence is as prevalent in Boulder as anywhere else, and Boulderites need to stop ignoring it with their self-righteous, shove-it-under-the-carpet attitudes. People tend to ignore crime until it affects them personally, but then it's 100 late. My father related an incident concerning a black friend of his: When he went home one day, he caught four white boys taking some things from his 'apartment. When he tried to stop them they beat him with a bat and with his radio. He fell to the floor, but they continued kicking him. He couldn't do anything. It reminded him of the Ku Klux Klan. When he finally caught his second wind, his attackers had fled. You may find it hard to believe that such an event could happen here, in Boulder. But the thing that disgusted me the most about this story is that 24 CU students watched the incident from their balconies. A neighbor even took the opportunity to steal his stereo speakers while he was being beaten up. The students didn't help. They didn't even call the police, they just stood by— dumbfounded. Afterwards they said to him, "We saw it all." O Over the summer, a friend of mine who attended college was raped in the relative safety of her own apartment. While sleeping in her bed, she was awakened by a strange man who broke into her home shining light in her eyes. She never saw his face. Another woman, whom I knew briefly, was found dead in Boulder Creek. One morning i read an article in the paper about a woman wearing a white dress found in the Creek. Later, I realized that I had talked to that same woman just the day before — I even remember the white dress that she wore. Then, I realized that I would never see her again. The cause of her death is still unknown. These are crimes that have lept from the comfortably impersonal black and white pages of the newspaper into my personal life. The crime rate in Boulder may not be comparable to the crime in the Bronx, Detroit or Los Angeles. It may not even be as high as the crime rate in Denver. But, low statistics don't mean that crime does not exist here. For those who believe Boulder to be a haven from crime and see only the safety a small city supposedly offers, stop ignoring the facts. Don't ignore the few crimes which could give our city a bad name, or make reality a little less pretty. Acknowledge these acts of crime for what they are — immoral and frightening. What can be done to prevent these scenarios from happening? Be aware! You must understand that we do not live in a crime free society. Prevent crimes from happening to other people by helping them if they need help. Prevent crimes from happening to yourselves by locking your doors. Be conscious of where you are. If you are not in a safe place, be aware of that fact. Perhaps if my father's friend had locked his door, or if the woman who had been raped had locked hers (both had been unlocked), they might have been spared. The Crimestoppers program and neighborhood watches are useful community services. Walk and ride services are offered throughout the CU campus at night. Don't take any chances walking in an unsafe area alone. It's narrow-minded to assume that a crime will always happen to the next guy, and never to you. I am not telling you to be paranoid, nor am I trying to make you nervous. I am iust telling you to stay on your guard. Don't let someone else, or yourself, be hurt by ignorance. We cannot prevent all crimes from occurring, but we don't have to make it easy for the criminals. If you never get mugged, or raped or beaten up, then you're lucky. But Lady Luck doesn't grace everyone with her presence all the time. Be aware! TF l am not telling you to be paranoid, nor am I trying to make you nervous. I am just telling you to stay on your guard. |
2023.06.03 15:47 MatchThreadder Match Thread: Manchester City vs Manchester United English FA Cup
FT: Manchester City 2-1 Manchester United
Manchester City scorers: Ilkay Gündogan (1', 51')Manchester United scorers: Bruno Fernandes (33' PEN)
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Manchester City
Stefan Ortega, Rúben Dias, Manuel Akanji, Kyle Walker (Aymeric Laporte), Rodri, John Stones, Jack Grealish (Nathan Aké), Bernardo Silva, Erling Haaland, Ilkay Gündogan, Kevin De Bruyne (Phil Foden).
Subs: Cole Palmer, Riyad Mahrez, Rico Lewis, Julián Álvarez, Ederson, Kalvin Phillips.
____________________________
Manchester United
David de Gea, Victor Lindelöf (Scott McTominay), Raphaël Varane, Luke Shaw, Aaron Wan-Bissaka, Christian Eriksen (Alejandro Garnacho), Fred, Casemiro, Marcus Rashford, Jadon Sancho (Wout Weghorst), Bruno Fernandes.
Subs: Facundo Pellistri, Jack Butland, Tyrell Malacia, Diogo Dalot, Anthony Elanga, Harry Maguire.
1' Goal! Manchester City 1, Manchester United 0. Ilkay Gündogan (Manchester City) right footed shot from outside the box to the top right corner. Assisted by Kevin De Bruyne.
33' Goal! Manchester City 1, Manchester United 1. Bruno Fernandes (Manchester United) converts the penalty with a right footed shot to the bottom left corner.
45'+4' Aaron Wan-Bissaka (Manchester United) is shown the yellow card for a bad foul.
51' Goal! Manchester City 2, Manchester United 1. Ilkay Gündogan (Manchester City) left footed shot from outside the box to the bottom left corner. Assisted by Kevin De Bruyne following a set piece situation.
62' Substitution, Manchester United. Alejandro Garnacho replaces Christian Eriksen.
76' Substitution, Manchester City. Phil Foden replaces Kevin De Bruyne.
78' Substitution, Manchester United. Wout Weghorst replaces Jadon Sancho.
79' Fred (Manchester United) is shown the yellow card for a bad foul.
81' Stefan Ortega (Manchester City) is shown the yellow card.
83' Substitution, Manchester United. Scott McTominay replaces Victor Lindelöf.
89' Substitution, Manchester City. Nathan Aké replaces Jack Grealish.
90' Rodri (Manchester City) is shown the yellow card for hand ball.
90'+5' Substitution, Manchester City. Aymeric Laporte replaces Kyle Walker because of an injury.
2023.06.03 15:44 Person21323231213242 MMW: If the US intervenes into Mexico (as some American politicians suggest), it will cause a costly, endless war that will result in irreparable damage to the US
TL;DR: The US Intervening into Mexico to defeat the Cartels would spiral out of control very quickly, converting Mexico and quite possibly the Southwestern US into Afghanistan 2.0 for the US military.
There has been rhetoric over the past few months by various right wing politicians in the US that the US should attack the cartels in Mexico, with or without the Mexican government's approval. Politicians like Lindsay Graham, Dan Crenshaw and Marjorie Taylor Greene have floated the idea, and even Presidential candidates like Tim Scott (https://reason.com/2023/05/24/the-republican-primary-consensus-for-sending-the-military-into-mexico/ ) and Donald Trump (https://www.foxnews.com/politics/trump-vows-deploy-special-forces-military-assets-inflict-maximum-damage-cartels). This is honestly a terrible idea for the US, despite the damage that cartels currently do when it comes to the drug trade. It is like shooting your own leg because of a tick so to speak.
Mexico is an absolutely enormous country, the size of Western Europe, with a population of 126 million people. It also has a geography not too different than Afghanistan, lined with several mountain ranges and many deserts - yet differs with the rainforests of the south. These Mountain ranges consist of most of Mexico's interior, with the coasts and east seeming like the only locations where major tank warfare would be very possible. It is a county that would be an insurgent's dream.
These politicians specifically claim that the US should intervene into Mexico as to defeat the Cartels with or without the help of the Mexican government. I need to mention - the latter is almost certainly true. Despite Mexico's problems most Mexicans are still very proud of their country and very much do not want a US intervention onto their territory, a political consideration that could sink any Mexican government who willingly lets in US troops. So any US intervention into Mexico would also have to deal with the Mexican government, and effectively be an invasion of the country. It would not just be a border operation either - some of the main Cartel hotspots like Mihoacan and Guerrero provinces are further south from the US than Mexico City. Any operation would have to go at least that far into Mexico in order to achieve meaningful success.
Sure, the Mexican Government in Mexico City could be overthrown relatively quickly, if they prove to be an obstacle in any US intervention. They struggle against Cartels alone, and using a naval invasion the US government could take Veracruz (the closest port to Mexico city), and then march onto Mexico City in a relatively short time. The government is fragile enough that it wouldn't survive the loss of the capital. Yet this fragility in and of itself is one of the main reasons why a war in Mexico would be so terrible. Cartels - the very cartels the US would try to destroy in this war - effectively control swathes of the country, and have long experience with asymmetric warfare. With a total Mexican government collapse, they would become warlords fully ruling over their little domains. And this would be when they would be most dangerous. The US couldn't just kill one leader and be done with it, they would have to destroy every single faction to win this war. And if the factions ally to fight the Americans, then that simply means divide and conquer strategy is removed from the table as a means to defeat them.
Due to US blunders the cartels have access to US weapons, and some even have US training (https://www.aljazeera.com/features/2010/11/3/us-trained-cartel-terrorises-mexico https://www.propublica.org/article/allende-zetas-cartel-massacre-and-the-us-dea ). Additionally, Cartels apparently have a history of attempting to corrupt US border agents (https://www.newsnationnow.com/us-news/immigration/border-coverage/as-cartel-power-rises-so-do-concerns-about-cbp-corruption/ , https://www.nytimes.com/2016/12/28/us/homeland-security-border-bribes.html , https://www.businessinsider.com/customs-border-agents-mexican-cartel-smuggling-2016-11 ) , an issue which will allow them to blunt the effectiveness of US operations and continue to access guns within the US. Such problems will be greatly worsened if the Cartels experience similar success corrupting US army troops. These problems will make it more difficult for US forces to fight the Mexican Cartels in an open war, as many of them will be able to counter what the US throws at them.
It is very doubtful that the war would remain a US vs Cartel war anyway. A US intervention into Mexico without Mexican government approval would be seen by the Mexican people as a patriotic war of independence, something akin to how Ukrainians feel about the Ukraine war. Non-cartel nationalist militias will almost certainly pop up to fight the US for this very purpose, following in the footsteps of previous Mexican national figures like Pancho Villa and Santa Ana. Given the broader appeal these sorts of groups would have among the Mexican public than cartels, they could even begin to replace the cartels as the US's main enemy in this Mexico War given a few years time. They would not be without international support either. For instance nearby Cuba has a long history of aiding Latin American guerilla forces against US forces/allies (like in Nicaragua, Columbia and Grenada), and has been heavily sanctioned by the US since the 1960s. Additionally, Wagner Group has already been attempting to establish itself in Mexico (https://www.politico.com/news/2023/02/18/russia-wagner-group-ukraine-paramilitary-00083553) - a war between Mexico and the US would be perfect for them to offer their services, and recruit Mexicans into their organization. Additionally a rebranding of this conflict from an anti-criminal operation to a war of Mexican sovereignty would bring much more sympathy to the Mexicans than to the US,. A new US war in Mexico would be like a second Iraq war when it comes to how badly it would affect US international relations, perhaps even worse.
This war would also likely require the US to intervene in many more countries than just Mexico. Mexican cartels have already expanded their activities to other countries throughout the region. Countries like Ecuador, Guatemala, Columbia, El Salvador and Honduras have been suspect to activities by Mexican cartels, mostly for the sake of controlling the supply chain of resources needed for producing drugs in Mexico. In these countries (especially Ecuador), Mexican drug cartels have coopted local gangs to help with their goals, and use local farmers to produce plants needed for drug production (such as coca needed for cocaine). Even if the US somehow eliminates the cartels from Mexico, they will simply move their base of operation to one of these countries and continue their practices. The US would need to export this war on Mexico to all of the countries where the cartel is active if they would want any chance of creating an end to such a war once it begins.
The US couldn't simply walk away from such a war. The US border has sections of deserts and mountains which are by definition hard to defend. Not to mention that there is already a huge amount of illegal tunnels between the US and Mexico, many of which are operated by the very cartels which the US would be at war with. These connections into the US are already the main way cartels get their guns and sell their drugs after all, so it would not be so difficult to repurpose them for attacks on American soil. With the population of the areas of the US right north of the US-Mexico border being majority latino, the local inhabitants will be virtually indistinguishable from any Mexican insurgents crossing the border into the US to commit attacks. As such it would be easy for operatives to sneak into the US, commit attacks on US towns north of the border, and then melt into the local population (similarly to the tactics used against US troops by insurgents in Iraq). This ability to vanish into the local population has the potential to cause a massive amount of persistent fear for Americans, and worsen the ethnic tensions between white and latino Americans. This war would be more like a larger version of the Israel - Palestine conflict rather than another Afghanistan in the sense that the line between the "warzone" and US territory would quickly blur.
This war would likely only become worse from there. If either the US starts launching reprisals on Mexican communities for insurgent attacks, or right wing American militias launch their own reprisals on American latino communities as purported "vigilante justice" for these insurgent attacks - latino communities (especially those with closer ties to Mexico) within the US could be pushed towards becoming insurgents themselves. This is more likely than it seems, as the US Army has committed massacres against civilians before as retribution for insurgent attacks (https://web.archive.org/web/20131212141534/http://abclocal.go.com/wpvi/story?id=8518011 https://www.latimes.com/archives/la-xpm-2006-nov-07-fg-balad7-story.html ). This would be similar to what happened with Arab Israelis during the 2021 Israel-Palestine crisis (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2021_Israel%E2%80%93Palestine_crisis ) when large swathes of Arab Israeli youths decided to riot in support of the Palestinian factions. After that point there is no going back, it would mean a true open war between US citizens. That is a pandora's box that would only cause greater harm for the US, and permanently render the Southwestern US a conflict zone. If this scenario comes to pass such a war could last decades - in a similar vein to the Troubles in Northern Ireland. This cannot be understated, no part of the continental US has been a part of a conflict zone since the Mexican civil war of the 1910s. And the permanent alienation of latino americans - a group which now consists of 62 million people out of the US population - would have severe ramifications for the internal security of the United States. It would be a crippling blow which cannot be quickly healed.
This conflict would eat away at the US's status as a world power. Being stuck in a major guerilla war right across the border, and a conflict spilling into the US proper, the US would have to deprioritize its interests elsewhere. As a rule of thumb (https://www.armyupress.army.mil/Portals/7/combat-studies-institute/csi-books/mcgrath_boots.pdf) there needs to be 20 soldiers for every thousand inhabitants for an occupation to be successful. For Mexico alone with its 126 million strong population, that means 2.52 million troops are needed for a successful occupation (to say nothing of the other countries which the Mexican Cartels would use as bases against the US, or the factor that the Southern US would experience spillover from the conflict). The US does not even have that many active troops, so they would have to cut corners like they did in Iraq (perhaps bringing the 2.52 million number down to 500,000 to at least create a semblance of a functional occupation). Overall this would leave the US much weaker on the geopolitical stage, and allow for US opponents to fill in the vacuum left by US power. For example, with so many troops tied up in Mexico, the US would need to rely a lot more on their fleet in order to defend Taiwan against China in the case of a Chinese invasion of that island, as the US simply would not have enough soldiers to fight the Chinese PLA on the ground. And the sheer expense needed to deal with a war in Mexico and insurgents within US borders would force the US to consider a considerable drawdown of their military support for allies like Ukraine.
If either Donald Trump or Tim Scott becomes president in 2024 (with Trump being the nearly guaranteed Republican nominee, given DeSantis's floundering), this war could very well become a reality. It could very well begin before 2026 - though I predict that this war could be started at any point between 2025 and 2028 if one of those candidates were to win the US presidency If this does happen, I highly doubt that the war will end anytime soon after it begins. Especially with the geopolitical destabilization of the Southwestern US, it would create challenges for the US which would harm its position across the world and greatly weaken its internal stability. Any candidate or person who considers this idea should reconsider it.
submitted by Person21323231213242 to MarkMyWords [link] [comments]
There has been rhetoric over the past few months by various right wing politicians in the US that the US should attack the cartels in Mexico, with or without the Mexican government's approval. Politicians like Lindsay Graham, Dan Crenshaw and Marjorie Taylor Greene have floated the idea, and even Presidential candidates like Tim Scott (https://reason.com/2023/05/24/the-republican-primary-consensus-for-sending-the-military-into-mexico/ ) and Donald Trump (https://www.foxnews.com/politics/trump-vows-deploy-special-forces-military-assets-inflict-maximum-damage-cartels). This is honestly a terrible idea for the US, despite the damage that cartels currently do when it comes to the drug trade. It is like shooting your own leg because of a tick so to speak.
Mexico is an absolutely enormous country, the size of Western Europe, with a population of 126 million people. It also has a geography not too different than Afghanistan, lined with several mountain ranges and many deserts - yet differs with the rainforests of the south. These Mountain ranges consist of most of Mexico's interior, with the coasts and east seeming like the only locations where major tank warfare would be very possible. It is a county that would be an insurgent's dream.
These politicians specifically claim that the US should intervene into Mexico as to defeat the Cartels with or without the help of the Mexican government. I need to mention - the latter is almost certainly true. Despite Mexico's problems most Mexicans are still very proud of their country and very much do not want a US intervention onto their territory, a political consideration that could sink any Mexican government who willingly lets in US troops. So any US intervention into Mexico would also have to deal with the Mexican government, and effectively be an invasion of the country. It would not just be a border operation either - some of the main Cartel hotspots like Mihoacan and Guerrero provinces are further south from the US than Mexico City. Any operation would have to go at least that far into Mexico in order to achieve meaningful success.
Sure, the Mexican Government in Mexico City could be overthrown relatively quickly, if they prove to be an obstacle in any US intervention. They struggle against Cartels alone, and using a naval invasion the US government could take Veracruz (the closest port to Mexico city), and then march onto Mexico City in a relatively short time. The government is fragile enough that it wouldn't survive the loss of the capital. Yet this fragility in and of itself is one of the main reasons why a war in Mexico would be so terrible. Cartels - the very cartels the US would try to destroy in this war - effectively control swathes of the country, and have long experience with asymmetric warfare. With a total Mexican government collapse, they would become warlords fully ruling over their little domains. And this would be when they would be most dangerous. The US couldn't just kill one leader and be done with it, they would have to destroy every single faction to win this war. And if the factions ally to fight the Americans, then that simply means divide and conquer strategy is removed from the table as a means to defeat them.
Due to US blunders the cartels have access to US weapons, and some even have US training (https://www.aljazeera.com/features/2010/11/3/us-trained-cartel-terrorises-mexico https://www.propublica.org/article/allende-zetas-cartel-massacre-and-the-us-dea ). Additionally, Cartels apparently have a history of attempting to corrupt US border agents (https://www.newsnationnow.com/us-news/immigration/border-coverage/as-cartel-power-rises-so-do-concerns-about-cbp-corruption/ , https://www.nytimes.com/2016/12/28/us/homeland-security-border-bribes.html , https://www.businessinsider.com/customs-border-agents-mexican-cartel-smuggling-2016-11 ) , an issue which will allow them to blunt the effectiveness of US operations and continue to access guns within the US. Such problems will be greatly worsened if the Cartels experience similar success corrupting US army troops. These problems will make it more difficult for US forces to fight the Mexican Cartels in an open war, as many of them will be able to counter what the US throws at them.
It is very doubtful that the war would remain a US vs Cartel war anyway. A US intervention into Mexico without Mexican government approval would be seen by the Mexican people as a patriotic war of independence, something akin to how Ukrainians feel about the Ukraine war. Non-cartel nationalist militias will almost certainly pop up to fight the US for this very purpose, following in the footsteps of previous Mexican national figures like Pancho Villa and Santa Ana. Given the broader appeal these sorts of groups would have among the Mexican public than cartels, they could even begin to replace the cartels as the US's main enemy in this Mexico War given a few years time. They would not be without international support either. For instance nearby Cuba has a long history of aiding Latin American guerilla forces against US forces/allies (like in Nicaragua, Columbia and Grenada), and has been heavily sanctioned by the US since the 1960s. Additionally, Wagner Group has already been attempting to establish itself in Mexico (https://www.politico.com/news/2023/02/18/russia-wagner-group-ukraine-paramilitary-00083553) - a war between Mexico and the US would be perfect for them to offer their services, and recruit Mexicans into their organization. Additionally a rebranding of this conflict from an anti-criminal operation to a war of Mexican sovereignty would bring much more sympathy to the Mexicans than to the US,. A new US war in Mexico would be like a second Iraq war when it comes to how badly it would affect US international relations, perhaps even worse.
This war would also likely require the US to intervene in many more countries than just Mexico. Mexican cartels have already expanded their activities to other countries throughout the region. Countries like Ecuador, Guatemala, Columbia, El Salvador and Honduras have been suspect to activities by Mexican cartels, mostly for the sake of controlling the supply chain of resources needed for producing drugs in Mexico. In these countries (especially Ecuador), Mexican drug cartels have coopted local gangs to help with their goals, and use local farmers to produce plants needed for drug production (such as coca needed for cocaine). Even if the US somehow eliminates the cartels from Mexico, they will simply move their base of operation to one of these countries and continue their practices. The US would need to export this war on Mexico to all of the countries where the cartel is active if they would want any chance of creating an end to such a war once it begins.
The US couldn't simply walk away from such a war. The US border has sections of deserts and mountains which are by definition hard to defend. Not to mention that there is already a huge amount of illegal tunnels between the US and Mexico, many of which are operated by the very cartels which the US would be at war with. These connections into the US are already the main way cartels get their guns and sell their drugs after all, so it would not be so difficult to repurpose them for attacks on American soil. With the population of the areas of the US right north of the US-Mexico border being majority latino, the local inhabitants will be virtually indistinguishable from any Mexican insurgents crossing the border into the US to commit attacks. As such it would be easy for operatives to sneak into the US, commit attacks on US towns north of the border, and then melt into the local population (similarly to the tactics used against US troops by insurgents in Iraq). This ability to vanish into the local population has the potential to cause a massive amount of persistent fear for Americans, and worsen the ethnic tensions between white and latino Americans. This war would be more like a larger version of the Israel - Palestine conflict rather than another Afghanistan in the sense that the line between the "warzone" and US territory would quickly blur.
This war would likely only become worse from there. If either the US starts launching reprisals on Mexican communities for insurgent attacks, or right wing American militias launch their own reprisals on American latino communities as purported "vigilante justice" for these insurgent attacks - latino communities (especially those with closer ties to Mexico) within the US could be pushed towards becoming insurgents themselves. This is more likely than it seems, as the US Army has committed massacres against civilians before as retribution for insurgent attacks (https://web.archive.org/web/20131212141534/http://abclocal.go.com/wpvi/story?id=8518011 https://www.latimes.com/archives/la-xpm-2006-nov-07-fg-balad7-story.html ). This would be similar to what happened with Arab Israelis during the 2021 Israel-Palestine crisis (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2021_Israel%E2%80%93Palestine_crisis ) when large swathes of Arab Israeli youths decided to riot in support of the Palestinian factions. After that point there is no going back, it would mean a true open war between US citizens. That is a pandora's box that would only cause greater harm for the US, and permanently render the Southwestern US a conflict zone. If this scenario comes to pass such a war could last decades - in a similar vein to the Troubles in Northern Ireland. This cannot be understated, no part of the continental US has been a part of a conflict zone since the Mexican civil war of the 1910s. And the permanent alienation of latino americans - a group which now consists of 62 million people out of the US population - would have severe ramifications for the internal security of the United States. It would be a crippling blow which cannot be quickly healed.
This conflict would eat away at the US's status as a world power. Being stuck in a major guerilla war right across the border, and a conflict spilling into the US proper, the US would have to deprioritize its interests elsewhere. As a rule of thumb (https://www.armyupress.army.mil/Portals/7/combat-studies-institute/csi-books/mcgrath_boots.pdf) there needs to be 20 soldiers for every thousand inhabitants for an occupation to be successful. For Mexico alone with its 126 million strong population, that means 2.52 million troops are needed for a successful occupation (to say nothing of the other countries which the Mexican Cartels would use as bases against the US, or the factor that the Southern US would experience spillover from the conflict). The US does not even have that many active troops, so they would have to cut corners like they did in Iraq (perhaps bringing the 2.52 million number down to 500,000 to at least create a semblance of a functional occupation). Overall this would leave the US much weaker on the geopolitical stage, and allow for US opponents to fill in the vacuum left by US power. For example, with so many troops tied up in Mexico, the US would need to rely a lot more on their fleet in order to defend Taiwan against China in the case of a Chinese invasion of that island, as the US simply would not have enough soldiers to fight the Chinese PLA on the ground. And the sheer expense needed to deal with a war in Mexico and insurgents within US borders would force the US to consider a considerable drawdown of their military support for allies like Ukraine.
If either Donald Trump or Tim Scott becomes president in 2024 (with Trump being the nearly guaranteed Republican nominee, given DeSantis's floundering), this war could very well become a reality. It could very well begin before 2026 - though I predict that this war could be started at any point between 2025 and 2028 if one of those candidates were to win the US presidency If this does happen, I highly doubt that the war will end anytime soon after it begins. Especially with the geopolitical destabilization of the Southwestern US, it would create challenges for the US which would harm its position across the world and greatly weaken its internal stability. Any candidate or person who considers this idea should reconsider it.
2023.06.03 15:38 obeliskposture Short story about bad times & bad jobs
I've shared fiction here before and it didn't go altogether too poorly, so I'm going to press my luck and do it again. This was written about a year ago, and I'm tired of trying to peddle it to lit magazines. Might as well share it here, know that it met a few eyeballs, and have done with it.
It's relevant to the sub insofar as it's about urban alienation and the working conditions at a small business run by IN THIS HOUSE WE BELIEVE people. (I tried to pitch it as a story of the great resignation with a momentary flicker of cosmic horror.) It's based on a similar job I took on after getting laid off during the lockdown, and the circumstances of the main character's breakup are faintly similar to one I went through several years back (her job sucked the life out of her).
Without further ado:
* * *
It was getting close to midnight, and the temperature outside was still above 80 degrees. We’d locked up the shop at 10:15 and walked over to Twenty, the dive bar on Poplar Street, where a single wall-mounted air conditioner and four wobbly ceiling fans weren’t putting up much resistance against the July heat baking the place from the outside and the dense mass of bodies giving it a stifling fever from within.
Just now I came close to saying it was a Wednesday night, because that was usually when the cyclists descended upon Avenue Brew, the gritty-but-bougie craft beer and sandwich shop I was working at back then. Every Wednesday between March and November, about fifteen to twenty-five Gen Xers dressed in skintight polyester, all packages and camel toes and fanny packs, locked up their thousand-dollar bikes on the sidewalk and lined up for IPAs and paninis. They reliably arrived around 8:00, an hour before we closed, making it impossible to get started on the closing checklist and leave on time at 10:00. The worst of them were demanding and rude, and even the best got raucous and stubborn after a couple drinks. There were nights when bringing in the sidewalk tables couldn’t be done without arguing with them. Most were sub-par tippers, to boot.
After Wednesday came and went that week without so much as a single 40-something in Ray Bans and padded shorts stopping in to double-fist two cans of Jai Alai, we dared to hope the cyclists had chosen another spot to be their finish line from there on out. But no—they’d only postponed their weekly ride, and swarmed us on Friday night instead.
I was the last person to find out; I was clocked in as purchaser that evening. The position was something like a promotion I'd received a year earlier: for twenty hours a week, I got to retreat from the public and sit in the back room with the store laptop, reviewing sales and inventory, answering emails from brewery reps, and ordering beer, beverages, and assorted paper goods. When I put in hours as purchaser, my wage went up from $11 to $15 an hour, but I was removed from the tip pool. On most days, tips amounted to an extra two or three dollars an hour, so I usually came out ahead.
This was back in 2021. I don't know what Avenue Brew pays these days.
Anyway, at about 8:15, I stepped out to say goodbye to everyone and found the shop in chaos. Friday nights were generally pretty active, the cyclists' arrival had turned the place into a mob scene. The line extended to the front door. The phone was ringing. The Grubhub tablet dinged like an alarm clock without a snooze button. Danny was on the sandwich line and on the verge of losing his temper. Oliver was working up a sweat running food, bussing tables, and replenishing ingredients from the walk-in. The unflappable Marina was on register, and even she seemed like she was about to snap at somebody.
What else could I do? I stayed until closing to answer the phone, process Grubhub orders, hop on and off the second register, and help Danny with sandwich prep. After the tills were counted out, I stayed another hour to take care of the dishes, since nobody had a chance to do a first load. Oliver was grateful, even though he grumbled about having to make some calls and rearrange Sunday's schedule so I could come in a couple hours late. Irene and Jeremy, Avenue Brew's owners, would kick his ass if he let me go into overtime.
Danny suggested that we deserved a few drinks ourselves after managing to get through the shift without killing anyone. Not even Marina could find a reason to disagree with him.
The neighborhood had undergone enough gentrification to support an upscale brunch spot, an ice cream parlor, a gourmet burger restaurant, a coffee and bahn mi shop, and Avenue Brew (to name a few examples), but not yet quite enough that the people who staffed them couldn’t afford to live within a ten-minute walk from the main avenue where all these hep eateries stood between 24-hour corner stores with slot machines in back, late-night Chinese and Mexico-Italian takeout joints with bulletproof glass at the counters, and long-shuttered delis and shoe stores. Twenty on Poplar was the watering hole set aside for people like us. It was dim, a bit dilapidated, and inexpensive, and usually avoided by denizens of the condos popping up on the vacant lots and replacing clusters of abandoned row houses.
When we arrived, Kyle waved us over. He didn’t work at Avenue Brew anymore, but still kept up with a few of us. He was at Twenty at least four nights out of the week.
So there we all were. I sat with a brooding stranger freestyling to himself in a low mumble on the stool to my left and Oliver on my right, who tapped at his phone and nursed a bottle of Twisted Tea. To Oliver’s right sat Marina, staring at nothing in particular and trying to ignore Danny, who stood behind her, closer than she would have liked, listening to Kyle explain the crucial differences between the Invincible comic book and the Invincible web series.
I recall being startled back to something like wakefulness when it seemed to me that the ceiling had sprouted a new fan. I blinked my eyes, and it wasn’t there anymore. It reminded me of an incident from when I was still living with my folks in South Jersey and still had a car, and was driving home from a friend’s house party up in Bergen County. It was 6:30 AM, I hadn’t slept all night, and needed to get home so I could get at least little shuteye before heading to Whole Foods for my 11:00 AM shift. I imagined I passed beneath the shadows of overpasses I knew weren’t there, and realized I was dreaming at the wheel.
I was pretty thoroughly zombified at that point. Heather and I had broken up for good the night before, and I hadn't gotten even a minute of sleep. Calling out at Avenue Brew was tough. Unless you found someone willing to cover your shift on like six hours' notice, you were liable to get a writeup, a demotion, or your hours cut if you couldn't produce a doctor's note. So I loaded up on caffeine pills and Five-Hour Energy bottles at the corner store, and powered through as best I could.
I finished the last thimbleful of Blue Moon in my glass. Oliver wiped the sweat from the back of his neck with a napkin and covered his mouth to stifle a laugh at the KiwiFarms thread he was scrolling through. Pool balls clacked; somebody swore and somebody laughed. The TouchTunes box was playing Bob Dylan’s “Rain Day Woman #12 & 35,” and enough bleary 40-something men around the bar were bobbing their heads and mouthing the words to make it impossible to determine which one of them paid two bucks to hear it. A guy by the cigarette machine who looked like a caricature of Art Carney in flannel and an old Pixies T-shirt was accosting a woman who must have been a toddler when he hit drinking age, and she momentarily made eye contact with me as she scanned the area for a way out. Danny was shouting over the bartender’s head, carrying on a conversation with the Hot Guy from Pizza Stan’s, who was sitting on the horseshoe’s opposite arm.
I never got his name, but when Oliver first referred to him as the Hot Guy from Pizza Stan’s, I knew exactly who he meant. Philly scene kid par excellence. Mid-20s, washed-out black denim, dyed black hair, thick bangs, and dark, gentle eyes. He was only truly alluring when he was on the job, because he seldom smiled then—and when he smiled, he broke the spell by exposing his teeth, stained a gnarly shade of mahogany from too much smoking and not enough brushing.
“How’s Best? Marcus still a joker?” Danny asked him.
“Yeah, you know Marcus. You know how he is.”
So the Hot Guy had been working at Best Burger (directly across the street from Avenue Brew) ever since Pizza Stan’s owners mismanaged the place unto insolvency. (Afterwards it was renovated and reopened as a vegan bakery—which incidentally closed down about a month ago.) Danny used to work at Best Burger, but that ended after he got into a shouting match with the owner. I happened to overhear it while I was dragging in the tables and collecting the chairs from the sidewalk the night it happened. It wasn’t any of my business, and I tried not to pay attention, but they were really tearing into each other. A month later, Oliver welcomed Danny aboard at Avenue Brew. I hadn’t known he’d been interviewed, and by then it was too late to mention the incident. But I’d have been a hypocrite to call it a red flag after the way I resigned from my position as Café Chakra's assistant manager two years earlier—not that we need to go dredging that up right now. Let's say there was some bad blood and leave it at that.
Anyway, I was thinking about giving in and buying a pack of cigarettes from the machine—and then remembered that Twenty didn’t have a cigarette machine. I looked again. The Art Carney-lookalike was still there, fingering his phone with a frown, but the girl was gone—and so was the cigarette machine.
I had only a moment to puzzle over this before Danny clapped me on the shoulder and thrust a shot glass in front of me.
“Starfish!” he said. (Danny called me Starfish. Everybody else called me Pat.) “You look like you need some juice.”
He distributed shots to everyone else. Marina declined hers, but changed her mind when Kyle offered to take it instead.
She and Kyle had stopped sleeping together after Kyle left Avenue Brew to work at the Victory taproom on the Parkway, but Marina was still concerned about his bad habits, which Danny delighted in encouraging.
We all leaned in to clink our glasses. Before I could find an appropriate moment to ask Marina if I could bum a cigarette, she got up to visit the bathroom. Danny took her seat and bowed his head for a conspiratorial word with Kyle.
I watched from the corner of my eye and tried to listen in. Like Marina, I was a little worried about Kyle. He got hired at Avenue Brew around the same time I did, just before the pandemic temporarily turned us into a takeout joint. He was a senior at Drexel then, an English major, and sometimes talked about wanting to either find work in publishing or carve out a career as a freelance writer after graduating. But first he intended to spend a year getting some life in before submitting himself to the forever grind.
He read a lot of Charles Bukowski and Hunter Thompson. He relished the gritty and sordid, and had already been good at sniffing it out around the neighborhood and in West Philly before Danny introduced him to cocaine, casinos, strip clubs, and a rogue’s gallery of shady but fascinating people. (None were really Danny’s friends; just fellow passengers who intersected with the part of his life where he sometimes went to Parx, sometimes came out ahead, sometimes spent his winnings on coke, and sometimes did bumps at titty bars.) Kyle recounted these adventures with a boyish enthusiasm for the naked reality of sleaze, like a middle schooler telling his locker room buddies about catching his older brother in flagrante and seeing so-and-so body parts doing such-and-such things.
Marina hated it. She never said as much to me, but she was afraid that the template Kyle set for his life during his “year off” was in danger of becoming locked in. The anniversary of his graduation had already passed, and now here he was trying to convince Danny to contribute a couple hundred dollars toward a sheet of acid his guy had for sale. He wasn't doing much writing lately.
I was the oldest employee at Avenue Brew (as I write this I’m 37, but fortunately I don’t look it), and when Kyle still worked with us I felt like it was my prerogative to give him some advice. The longer he waited to make inroads, I once told him, the more likely he’d be seen as damaged goods by the publishing world. He needed to jam his foot in the door while he was still young.
I could tell the conversation bored him, and didn’t bring up the subject again.
The bartender took my glass and curtly asked if I’d like another drink.
“No thanks, not yet,” I answered.
She slid me my bill.
I missed the old bartender, the one she’d replaced. I forget her name, but she was ingenuous and energetic and sweet. Pretty much everyone had some sort of crush on her. Sometimes she came into Avenue Brew for lunch, and tipped us as well as we tipped her. Maybe three months before that night—Danny witnessed it—she suddenly started crying and rushed out the door. Everyone at the bar mutely looked to each other for an explanation. (Fortunately for Twenty, the kitchen manager hadn’t left yet, and picked up the rest of her shift.)
She never came back. None of us had seen her since. But drafts still had to be poured and bottlecaps pulled off, and now here was another white woman in her mid-twenties wearing a black tank top, a pushup bra, and a scrunchie, same as before. Twenty’s regulars grew accustomed to not expecting to see the person she’d replaced, and life went on.
“How’re you doing?” I asked Oliver, just to say something to somebody, and to keep my thoughts from wandering back to Heather.
“Just kind of existing right now,” he answered. His phone lay face-up on the counter. He was swiping through Instagram, and I recognized the avatar of the user whose album he hate-browsed.
“And how’s Austin been?” I asked.
“Oh, you know. Not even three weeks after getting over the jetlag from his trip back from the Cascades, he’s off touring Ireland.” He shook his head. “Living his best life.”
He’d hired Austin on a part-time basis in September. We needed a new associate when Emma was promoted to replace a supervisor who'd quit without even giving his two weeks. There was a whole thing. I'm having a hard time recalling the guy's name, but I liked him well enough. He was a good worker and he seemed like a bright kid, but he was—well, he was young. Naïve. One day he found Jeremy sitting in the back room with his laptop, and took advantage of the open-door policy to ask why the store manager and supervisors didn’t get health benefits or paid time off. Jeremy told him it "was being worked on," and that he couldn’t discuss it any further at that time. I understand the kid got argumentative, though I never knew precisely what was said.
Irene started visiting the shop a lot more often after that, almost always arriving when the kid was working. No matter what he was doing, she’d find a reason to intervene, to micromanage and harangue him, and effectively make his job impossible. A coincidence, surely.
It’s something I still think about. By any metric, Jeremy and Irene have done very well for themselves. They’re both a little over 40 years old. I remember hearing they met at law school. In addition to Avenue Brew, they own a bistro in Francisville and an ice cream parlor in Point Breeze. They have a house on the Blue Line, send their son to a Montessori school, and pull up to their businesses in a white Volkswagen ID.4. But whenever the subject of benefits, wages, or even free shift meals came up, they pled poverty. It simply couldn’t be done. But they liked to remind us about all they did to make Avenue Brew a fun place to work, like let the staff pick the music and allow Oliver and me to conduct a beer tasting once a day. They stuck Black Lives Matter, Believe Women, and Progress flag decals on the front door and windows, and I remember Irene wearing a Black Trans Lives Matter shirt once or twice when covering a supervisor's shift. None of the college students or recent graduates who composed most of Avenue Brew's staff could say the bosses weren't on the right team. And yet...
I'm sorry—I was talking about Austin. He was maybe 30 and already had another job, a “real” job, some sort of remote gig lucrative enough for him to make rent on a studio in the picturesque Episcopal church down the street that had been converted into upscale apartments some years back. Austin wasn’t looking for extra cash. He wanted to socialize. To have something to do and people to talk to in the outside world. He wanted to make friends, and all of us could appreciate that—but it’s hard to be fond of a coworker who irredeemably sucks at his job. Austin never acted with any urgency, was inattentive to detail, and even after repeated interventions from Oliver and the supervisors, he continued to perform basic tasks in bafflingly inefficient ways. Having Austin on your shift meant carrying his slack, and everyone was fed up after a few months. Oliver sat him down, told him he was on thin ice, and gave him a list of the areas in which he needed to improve if he didn’t want to be let go.
When Austin gave Oliver the indignant “I don’t need this job” speech, it was different from those times Danny or I told a boss to go to hell and walked out. Austin truly didn’t need it. He basically said the job was beneath him, and so was Oliver.
It got deep under Oliver’s skin. He did need the job and had to take it seriously, even when it meant being the dipshit manager chewing out a man four or five years his senior. He earned $18 an hour (plus tips when he wasn’t doing admin work), had debts to pay off, and couldn't expect to get any help from his family.
The important thing, though, the part I distinctly remember, was that Oliver was looking at a video of a wading bird Austin had recorded. An egret, maybe. White feathers, long black legs, pointy black beak. Austin must have been standing on a ledge above a creek, because he had an overhead view of the bird as it stood in the water, slowly and deliberately stretching and retracting its neck, eyeing the wriggling little shadows below. As far as the fish could know, they were swimming around a pair of reeds growing out of the silt. The predator from which they extended was of a world beyond their understanding and out of their reach.
The video ended. Oliver moved on to the next item: a photograph of the bird from the same perspective, with a fish clamped in its beak. Water droplets flung from the victim's thrashing tail caught the sunlight. And I remember now, I clearly remember, the shapes of like twelve other fish stupidly milling about the bird's feet, unperturbed and unpanicked.
Danny peered at Oliver’s phone and observed a resemblance between the bird—its shape and bearing, and the composition of the photograph—and a POV porn video shot from behind and above, and he told us so. Elaborately. He made squawking noises.
“And mom says I’m a degenerate,” Oliver sighed. “Can you practice your interspecies pickup artist shit somewhere else?” Oliver flicked his wrist, shooing Danny off, and held his phone in front of his face to signal that he was done talking.
Danny sagged a little on his stool and turned away. I sometimes felt bad for him. For all his faults, he had the heart of a puppy dog. He really did think of us as his tribe. There was nobody else who’d only ever answer “yes” when you asked him to pick up a shift, and he did it completely out of loyalty.
He was turning 29 in a week. I wondered how many people would actually turn out to celebrate with him at the Black Taxi. Kyle probably would—but even he regarded Danny more as a source of vulgar entertainment than a friend.
Then it happened again. When I turned to speak to Oliver, there’d been a pair of pool cues leaning side-by-side against the wall a few stools down. Now they were gone.
This time it might have been my imagination. Somebody passing by could have casually snatched them up and kept walking.
But a moment later I seemed to notice a second TouchTunes box protruding from the wall directly behind me. I let it be.
Marina returned from the bathroom. Danny rose and offered her back her seat with an exaggerated bow. Before she got settled, I asked if she’d like to step outside with me. She withdrew her pack of Marlboro Menthols from her canvas bag, which she left sitting on the stool to deter Danny from sitting back down.
Marina never minded letting me bum cigarettes from time to time. I couldn’t buy them for myself anymore; it’s a habit I could never keep under control, and was only getting more expensive. Like everything else in the world. About once a month I reimbursed her by buying her a pack.
The air out on the sidewalk was as hot as the air inside Twenty, but easier to breathe. After lighting up, Marina leaned against the bricks and sighed.
“I wish Oliver would fire Danny already and get it over with.”
I nodded. Marina rarely talked about anything but work.
“He sneaks drinks and doesn't think anyone notices he's buzzed,” she went on. “He steals so much shit and isn’t even a little subtle about it. He’s going to get Oliver in trouble. And he’s a creep.”
“Yeah,” I said. These were her usual complaints about Danny, and they were all true. “At least he’s better than Austin.”
“That’s a low bar.”
Three dirt bikes and an ATV roared down the lonely street, charging through stop sign after stop sign, putting our talk on hold.
“Remind me. You’ve got one semester left, right?” I asked after the noise ebbed.
“Yep.”
Marina was a marketing major at Temple. She’d had an internship during the spring semester, and her boss told her to give her a call the very minute she graduated. Her parents in central Pennsylvania couldn’t pay her rent or tuition for her, so she was a full-time student and a full-time employee at Avenue Brew. Her emotional spectrum ranged from "tired" to "over it." She’d been waiting tables and working at coffee shops since she was seventeen, had no intention of continuing for even a day longer than she had to, and feared the escape hatch would slam shut if she dallied too long after prying it open.
She’d considered majoring in English, like Kyle. She went for marketing instead. I couldn’t blame her.
“Are you okay?” she asked. “You’ve been kind of off all day.”
“I’m terrible.”
“Why?”
I gave dodgy answers, but she asked precisely the right follow-up questions to get me going about what happened with Heather the night before.
It was the new job. Before the pandemic, Heather worked as a server at a Center City bar and grill. (That's where I met her; we were coworkers for about a year, and then I left to work Café Chakra because it was quieter and closer to where I lived.) When the place closed its doors and laid everyone off during the lockdown, she got a stopgap job at the Acme on Passyunk, and hated it. Then in March, she found a bar-and-lounge gig in a ritzy hotel on Broad Street. Very corporate. Excellent pay, great benefits. Definitely a step up. But her new employers made Irene and Jeremy look like Bob and Linda Belcher by comparison. It was the kind of place where someone had recently gotten herself fired for leaving work to rush to the hospital after getting the news that her grandmother was about to be taken off life support, and not finding someone to come in and cover the last two hours of her shift.
Heather seldom worked fewer than fifty-five hours a week, and her schedule was even more erratic than mine. At least once a week she left the hotel at 1:00 or 2:00 AM and returned at 9:00 the next morning. Neither of us could remember the last time she’d had two consecutive days off, and it had been over a month since one of mine overlapped with one of hers. She’d spent it drinking alone at home. All she wanted was some privacy.
I’d biked to South Philly to meet her when she got home at 1:30. The argument that killed our relationship for good began around 2:30, when I complained that we never had sex anymore. Heather accused me of only caring about that, when she was so exhausted and stressed that her hair was falling out in the shower. Quit the job? She couldn’t quit. The money was too good. She had student loans, medical bills, and credit card debt, and for the first time in her life she could imagine paying it all off before hitting menopause.
So, yeah, I was cranky about our sex life being dead in the water. Say whatever you like. But at that point, what were we to each other? We did nothing together anymore but complain about work before one or both of us fell asleep. That isn’t a relationship.
She said my hair always smelled like sandwiches, even after bathing, and she was done pretending it didn’t turn her off. I told her she was one to talk—she always reeked of liquor. As things escalated, we stopped caring if her roommates heard us. “You want to be a father?” she shouted around 4:00 AM. “Making what you make? That poor fucking kid.”
We fought until sunrise, and I left her apartment with the understanding that I wouldn’t be coming back, wouldn’t be calling her ever again. I biked home and sat on the steps facing the cement panel that was my house’s backyard. After my phone died and I couldn’t anaesthetize myself with dumb YouTube videos or make myself feel crazy staring at the download button for the Tinder app, I watched the sparrows hopping on and off the utility lines for a while.
At 11:40 I went inside. One of my roommates was already in the shower, so the best I could do was put on a clean Avenue Brew T-shirt before walking to the shop and clocking in at noon to help deal with the lunch rush.
“That’s a lot,” Marina finally said. “Sorry.”
I don’t know what I was expecting her to say. She was sixteen years my junior, after all, and just a coworker. She didn’t need to hear any of this, and I definitely didn't need to be telling her. But who else was there to tell?
She’d already finished her cigarette. I still had a few puffs left. She went inside.
I decided to call it a night.
The second TouchTunes box was gone—naturally. Danny had taken my stool, and regarded my approach with a puckish you snooze you lose grin. I wasn’t going to say anything. I’d just pay my bill, give everyone a nod goodnight, and walk the five blocks back home.
And then Danny disappeared.
One second, he was there. The next—gone.
Danny didn’t just instantaneously vanish. Even when something happens in the blink of an eye, you can still put together something of a sequence. I saw him—I seemed to see him—falling into himself, collapsing to a point, and then to nothing.
You know how sometimes a sound is altogether inaudible unless you’re looking at the source—like when you don’t realize somebody’s whispering at you, and can then hear and understand them after they get your attention? I think that was the case here. I wouldn't have known to listen if I hadn't seen it happen. What I heard lingered for two, maybe three seconds, and wasn't any louder than a fly buzzing inside a lampshade. A tiny and impossibly distant scream, pitchshifted like a receding ambulance siren into a basso drone...
I don’t know. I don’t know for sure. I’m certain I remember a flash of red, and I have the idea of Danny’s trunk expanding, opening up as it imploded. A crimson flower, flecked white, with spooling pink stalks—and Danny’s wide-eyed face above it, drawn twisting and shrinking into its petals.
For an instant, Twenty’s interior shimmered. Not shimmered, exactly—glitched would be a better word. If you’re old enough to remember the fragmented graphics that sometimes flashed onscreen when you turned on the Nintendo without blowing on the cartridge, you’ll have an idea of what I mean. It happened much too fast, and there was too much of it to absorb. The one clear impression I could parse was the mirage of a cash register flickering upside-down above the pool table.
Not a cash register. The shape was familiar, but the texture was wrong. I think it was ribbed, sort of like a maggot. I think it glistened. Like—camo doesn’t work anymore when the wearer stops crouching behind a bush and breaks into a run. Do you get what I’m saying?
Nobody else seemed to notice. The pool balls clacked. A New Order track was playing on the TouchTunes box. A nearby argument about about Nick Sirianni continued unabated.
Finally, there was a downward rush of air—and this at least elicited a reaction from the bartender, who slapped my bill to keep it from sailing off the counter.
“Danny,” I said.
“Danny?” Kyle asked me quietly. His face had gone pale.
“Danny?” Oliver repeated in a faraway voice.
After a pause, Kyle blinked a few times. “You heard from him?”
“God forbid,” said Marina. “When he quit I was like, great, I can keep working here after all.”
“Oh, come on—”
“Kyle. Did I ever show you those texts he sent me once at three in the morning?” The color had returned to Oliver’s face.
“No, what did he say?”
Oliver tapped at his phone and turned the screen toward Kyle.
“Oh. Oh, jeez.”
“Right? Like—if you want to ask me something, ask me. You know? Don’t be weirdly accusatory about it…”
I pulled a wad of fives and ones from my pocket, threw it all onto the counter, and beelined for the exit without consideration for the people I squeezed through and shoved past on the way.
I heard Marina saying “let him go.”
I went a second consecutive night without sleep. Fortunately I wasn’t scheduled to come in the next day.
The schedule. It’s funny. Oliver was generally great at his job, and even when he wasn’t, I cut him a lot of slack because I knew Irene and Jeremy never gave him a moment’s peace. But I could never forgive him those times he waited until the weekend to make up and distribute the schedule. This was one of those weeks he didn’t get around to it until Saturday afternoon. When I found it in my inbox, Danny’s name wasn’t anywhere on it.
As far as I know, nobody who hadn’t been at Twenty that night asked what happened to him. We were a bit overstaffed as it was, and everyone probably assumed Danny was slated for the chopping block. The part-timers were, for the most part, happy to get a few additional hours.
Oliver abruptly quit around Labor Day after a final acrimonious clash with the owners. I never found out the details, and I never saw him again. Jeremy and Irene took turns minding the store while a replacement manager was sought. None of the supervisors would be pressured into taking the job; they knew from Oliver what they could expect.
About three weeks after Oliver left, I came in for my purchasing shift and found Jeremy waiting for me in the back room. I knew it was serious when he didn’t greet me with the awkward fist-bump he ordinarily required of his male employees.
“You’ve seen the numbers,” he said. Business for the summer had fallen short of expectations, it was true, and he and Irene had decided to rein in payroll expenses. My purchaser position was being eliminated. Its responsibilities would be redistributed among the supervisors and the new manager, when one was found. In the meantime, I'd be going back to the regular $11 an hour (plus tips of course) associate position full-time.
Jeremy assured me I'd be first in the running for supervisor the next time there was an opening.
I told him it was fine, I was done, and if he’d expected the courtesy of two weeks’ notice, he shouldn’t have blindsided me like that.
“Well, that’s your choice,” he answered, trying not to look pleased. His payroll problem was solving itself.
I racked up credit card debt for a few months. Applied for entry-level museum jobs that might appreciate my art history degree. Aimed for some purchasing and administrative assistant gigs, and just for the hell of it, turned in a resume for a facilitator position at an after-school art program. Got a few interviews. All of them eventually told me they’d decided to go in a different direction. I finally got hired to bartend at Hops from Underground, a microbrewery on Fairmount.
I’m still there. The money’s okay, but it fluctuates. Hours are reasonable. I’m on their high-deductible health plan. There’s a coworker I’ve been dating. Sort of dating. You know how it goes. In this line of work you get so used to people coming and going that you learn not to get too attached. I walk past Avenue Brew a few times a week, but stopped peering in through the window when I didn't recognize the people behind the counter anymore.
submitted by obeliskposture to stupidpol [link] [comments]
It's relevant to the sub insofar as it's about urban alienation and the working conditions at a small business run by IN THIS HOUSE WE BELIEVE people. (I tried to pitch it as a story of the great resignation with a momentary flicker of cosmic horror.) It's based on a similar job I took on after getting laid off during the lockdown, and the circumstances of the main character's breakup are faintly similar to one I went through several years back (her job sucked the life out of her).
Without further ado:
* * *
It was getting close to midnight, and the temperature outside was still above 80 degrees. We’d locked up the shop at 10:15 and walked over to Twenty, the dive bar on Poplar Street, where a single wall-mounted air conditioner and four wobbly ceiling fans weren’t putting up much resistance against the July heat baking the place from the outside and the dense mass of bodies giving it a stifling fever from within.
Just now I came close to saying it was a Wednesday night, because that was usually when the cyclists descended upon Avenue Brew, the gritty-but-bougie craft beer and sandwich shop I was working at back then. Every Wednesday between March and November, about fifteen to twenty-five Gen Xers dressed in skintight polyester, all packages and camel toes and fanny packs, locked up their thousand-dollar bikes on the sidewalk and lined up for IPAs and paninis. They reliably arrived around 8:00, an hour before we closed, making it impossible to get started on the closing checklist and leave on time at 10:00. The worst of them were demanding and rude, and even the best got raucous and stubborn after a couple drinks. There were nights when bringing in the sidewalk tables couldn’t be done without arguing with them. Most were sub-par tippers, to boot.
After Wednesday came and went that week without so much as a single 40-something in Ray Bans and padded shorts stopping in to double-fist two cans of Jai Alai, we dared to hope the cyclists had chosen another spot to be their finish line from there on out. But no—they’d only postponed their weekly ride, and swarmed us on Friday night instead.
I was the last person to find out; I was clocked in as purchaser that evening. The position was something like a promotion I'd received a year earlier: for twenty hours a week, I got to retreat from the public and sit in the back room with the store laptop, reviewing sales and inventory, answering emails from brewery reps, and ordering beer, beverages, and assorted paper goods. When I put in hours as purchaser, my wage went up from $11 to $15 an hour, but I was removed from the tip pool. On most days, tips amounted to an extra two or three dollars an hour, so I usually came out ahead.
This was back in 2021. I don't know what Avenue Brew pays these days.
Anyway, at about 8:15, I stepped out to say goodbye to everyone and found the shop in chaos. Friday nights were generally pretty active, the cyclists' arrival had turned the place into a mob scene. The line extended to the front door. The phone was ringing. The Grubhub tablet dinged like an alarm clock without a snooze button. Danny was on the sandwich line and on the verge of losing his temper. Oliver was working up a sweat running food, bussing tables, and replenishing ingredients from the walk-in. The unflappable Marina was on register, and even she seemed like she was about to snap at somebody.
What else could I do? I stayed until closing to answer the phone, process Grubhub orders, hop on and off the second register, and help Danny with sandwich prep. After the tills were counted out, I stayed another hour to take care of the dishes, since nobody had a chance to do a first load. Oliver was grateful, even though he grumbled about having to make some calls and rearrange Sunday's schedule so I could come in a couple hours late. Irene and Jeremy, Avenue Brew's owners, would kick his ass if he let me go into overtime.
Danny suggested that we deserved a few drinks ourselves after managing to get through the shift without killing anyone. Not even Marina could find a reason to disagree with him.
The neighborhood had undergone enough gentrification to support an upscale brunch spot, an ice cream parlor, a gourmet burger restaurant, a coffee and bahn mi shop, and Avenue Brew (to name a few examples), but not yet quite enough that the people who staffed them couldn’t afford to live within a ten-minute walk from the main avenue where all these hep eateries stood between 24-hour corner stores with slot machines in back, late-night Chinese and Mexico-Italian takeout joints with bulletproof glass at the counters, and long-shuttered delis and shoe stores. Twenty on Poplar was the watering hole set aside for people like us. It was dim, a bit dilapidated, and inexpensive, and usually avoided by denizens of the condos popping up on the vacant lots and replacing clusters of abandoned row houses.
When we arrived, Kyle waved us over. He didn’t work at Avenue Brew anymore, but still kept up with a few of us. He was at Twenty at least four nights out of the week.
So there we all were. I sat with a brooding stranger freestyling to himself in a low mumble on the stool to my left and Oliver on my right, who tapped at his phone and nursed a bottle of Twisted Tea. To Oliver’s right sat Marina, staring at nothing in particular and trying to ignore Danny, who stood behind her, closer than she would have liked, listening to Kyle explain the crucial differences between the Invincible comic book and the Invincible web series.
I recall being startled back to something like wakefulness when it seemed to me that the ceiling had sprouted a new fan. I blinked my eyes, and it wasn’t there anymore. It reminded me of an incident from when I was still living with my folks in South Jersey and still had a car, and was driving home from a friend’s house party up in Bergen County. It was 6:30 AM, I hadn’t slept all night, and needed to get home so I could get at least little shuteye before heading to Whole Foods for my 11:00 AM shift. I imagined I passed beneath the shadows of overpasses I knew weren’t there, and realized I was dreaming at the wheel.
I was pretty thoroughly zombified at that point. Heather and I had broken up for good the night before, and I hadn't gotten even a minute of sleep. Calling out at Avenue Brew was tough. Unless you found someone willing to cover your shift on like six hours' notice, you were liable to get a writeup, a demotion, or your hours cut if you couldn't produce a doctor's note. So I loaded up on caffeine pills and Five-Hour Energy bottles at the corner store, and powered through as best I could.
I finished the last thimbleful of Blue Moon in my glass. Oliver wiped the sweat from the back of his neck with a napkin and covered his mouth to stifle a laugh at the KiwiFarms thread he was scrolling through. Pool balls clacked; somebody swore and somebody laughed. The TouchTunes box was playing Bob Dylan’s “Rain Day Woman #12 & 35,” and enough bleary 40-something men around the bar were bobbing their heads and mouthing the words to make it impossible to determine which one of them paid two bucks to hear it. A guy by the cigarette machine who looked like a caricature of Art Carney in flannel and an old Pixies T-shirt was accosting a woman who must have been a toddler when he hit drinking age, and she momentarily made eye contact with me as she scanned the area for a way out. Danny was shouting over the bartender’s head, carrying on a conversation with the Hot Guy from Pizza Stan’s, who was sitting on the horseshoe’s opposite arm.
I never got his name, but when Oliver first referred to him as the Hot Guy from Pizza Stan’s, I knew exactly who he meant. Philly scene kid par excellence. Mid-20s, washed-out black denim, dyed black hair, thick bangs, and dark, gentle eyes. He was only truly alluring when he was on the job, because he seldom smiled then—and when he smiled, he broke the spell by exposing his teeth, stained a gnarly shade of mahogany from too much smoking and not enough brushing.
“How’s Best? Marcus still a joker?” Danny asked him.
“Yeah, you know Marcus. You know how he is.”
So the Hot Guy had been working at Best Burger (directly across the street from Avenue Brew) ever since Pizza Stan’s owners mismanaged the place unto insolvency. (Afterwards it was renovated and reopened as a vegan bakery—which incidentally closed down about a month ago.) Danny used to work at Best Burger, but that ended after he got into a shouting match with the owner. I happened to overhear it while I was dragging in the tables and collecting the chairs from the sidewalk the night it happened. It wasn’t any of my business, and I tried not to pay attention, but they were really tearing into each other. A month later, Oliver welcomed Danny aboard at Avenue Brew. I hadn’t known he’d been interviewed, and by then it was too late to mention the incident. But I’d have been a hypocrite to call it a red flag after the way I resigned from my position as Café Chakra's assistant manager two years earlier—not that we need to go dredging that up right now. Let's say there was some bad blood and leave it at that.
Anyway, I was thinking about giving in and buying a pack of cigarettes from the machine—and then remembered that Twenty didn’t have a cigarette machine. I looked again. The Art Carney-lookalike was still there, fingering his phone with a frown, but the girl was gone—and so was the cigarette machine.
I had only a moment to puzzle over this before Danny clapped me on the shoulder and thrust a shot glass in front of me.
“Starfish!” he said. (Danny called me Starfish. Everybody else called me Pat.) “You look like you need some juice.”
He distributed shots to everyone else. Marina declined hers, but changed her mind when Kyle offered to take it instead.
She and Kyle had stopped sleeping together after Kyle left Avenue Brew to work at the Victory taproom on the Parkway, but Marina was still concerned about his bad habits, which Danny delighted in encouraging.
We all leaned in to clink our glasses. Before I could find an appropriate moment to ask Marina if I could bum a cigarette, she got up to visit the bathroom. Danny took her seat and bowed his head for a conspiratorial word with Kyle.
I watched from the corner of my eye and tried to listen in. Like Marina, I was a little worried about Kyle. He got hired at Avenue Brew around the same time I did, just before the pandemic temporarily turned us into a takeout joint. He was a senior at Drexel then, an English major, and sometimes talked about wanting to either find work in publishing or carve out a career as a freelance writer after graduating. But first he intended to spend a year getting some life in before submitting himself to the forever grind.
He read a lot of Charles Bukowski and Hunter Thompson. He relished the gritty and sordid, and had already been good at sniffing it out around the neighborhood and in West Philly before Danny introduced him to cocaine, casinos, strip clubs, and a rogue’s gallery of shady but fascinating people. (None were really Danny’s friends; just fellow passengers who intersected with the part of his life where he sometimes went to Parx, sometimes came out ahead, sometimes spent his winnings on coke, and sometimes did bumps at titty bars.) Kyle recounted these adventures with a boyish enthusiasm for the naked reality of sleaze, like a middle schooler telling his locker room buddies about catching his older brother in flagrante and seeing so-and-so body parts doing such-and-such things.
Marina hated it. She never said as much to me, but she was afraid that the template Kyle set for his life during his “year off” was in danger of becoming locked in. The anniversary of his graduation had already passed, and now here he was trying to convince Danny to contribute a couple hundred dollars toward a sheet of acid his guy had for sale. He wasn't doing much writing lately.
I was the oldest employee at Avenue Brew (as I write this I’m 37, but fortunately I don’t look it), and when Kyle still worked with us I felt like it was my prerogative to give him some advice. The longer he waited to make inroads, I once told him, the more likely he’d be seen as damaged goods by the publishing world. He needed to jam his foot in the door while he was still young.
I could tell the conversation bored him, and didn’t bring up the subject again.
The bartender took my glass and curtly asked if I’d like another drink.
“No thanks, not yet,” I answered.
She slid me my bill.
I missed the old bartender, the one she’d replaced. I forget her name, but she was ingenuous and energetic and sweet. Pretty much everyone had some sort of crush on her. Sometimes she came into Avenue Brew for lunch, and tipped us as well as we tipped her. Maybe three months before that night—Danny witnessed it—she suddenly started crying and rushed out the door. Everyone at the bar mutely looked to each other for an explanation. (Fortunately for Twenty, the kitchen manager hadn’t left yet, and picked up the rest of her shift.)
She never came back. None of us had seen her since. But drafts still had to be poured and bottlecaps pulled off, and now here was another white woman in her mid-twenties wearing a black tank top, a pushup bra, and a scrunchie, same as before. Twenty’s regulars grew accustomed to not expecting to see the person she’d replaced, and life went on.
“How’re you doing?” I asked Oliver, just to say something to somebody, and to keep my thoughts from wandering back to Heather.
“Just kind of existing right now,” he answered. His phone lay face-up on the counter. He was swiping through Instagram, and I recognized the avatar of the user whose album he hate-browsed.
“And how’s Austin been?” I asked.
“Oh, you know. Not even three weeks after getting over the jetlag from his trip back from the Cascades, he’s off touring Ireland.” He shook his head. “Living his best life.”
He’d hired Austin on a part-time basis in September. We needed a new associate when Emma was promoted to replace a supervisor who'd quit without even giving his two weeks. There was a whole thing. I'm having a hard time recalling the guy's name, but I liked him well enough. He was a good worker and he seemed like a bright kid, but he was—well, he was young. Naïve. One day he found Jeremy sitting in the back room with his laptop, and took advantage of the open-door policy to ask why the store manager and supervisors didn’t get health benefits or paid time off. Jeremy told him it "was being worked on," and that he couldn’t discuss it any further at that time. I understand the kid got argumentative, though I never knew precisely what was said.
Irene started visiting the shop a lot more often after that, almost always arriving when the kid was working. No matter what he was doing, she’d find a reason to intervene, to micromanage and harangue him, and effectively make his job impossible. A coincidence, surely.
It’s something I still think about. By any metric, Jeremy and Irene have done very well for themselves. They’re both a little over 40 years old. I remember hearing they met at law school. In addition to Avenue Brew, they own a bistro in Francisville and an ice cream parlor in Point Breeze. They have a house on the Blue Line, send their son to a Montessori school, and pull up to their businesses in a white Volkswagen ID.4. But whenever the subject of benefits, wages, or even free shift meals came up, they pled poverty. It simply couldn’t be done. But they liked to remind us about all they did to make Avenue Brew a fun place to work, like let the staff pick the music and allow Oliver and me to conduct a beer tasting once a day. They stuck Black Lives Matter, Believe Women, and Progress flag decals on the front door and windows, and I remember Irene wearing a Black Trans Lives Matter shirt once or twice when covering a supervisor's shift. None of the college students or recent graduates who composed most of Avenue Brew's staff could say the bosses weren't on the right team. And yet...
I'm sorry—I was talking about Austin. He was maybe 30 and already had another job, a “real” job, some sort of remote gig lucrative enough for him to make rent on a studio in the picturesque Episcopal church down the street that had been converted into upscale apartments some years back. Austin wasn’t looking for extra cash. He wanted to socialize. To have something to do and people to talk to in the outside world. He wanted to make friends, and all of us could appreciate that—but it’s hard to be fond of a coworker who irredeemably sucks at his job. Austin never acted with any urgency, was inattentive to detail, and even after repeated interventions from Oliver and the supervisors, he continued to perform basic tasks in bafflingly inefficient ways. Having Austin on your shift meant carrying his slack, and everyone was fed up after a few months. Oliver sat him down, told him he was on thin ice, and gave him a list of the areas in which he needed to improve if he didn’t want to be let go.
When Austin gave Oliver the indignant “I don’t need this job” speech, it was different from those times Danny or I told a boss to go to hell and walked out. Austin truly didn’t need it. He basically said the job was beneath him, and so was Oliver.
It got deep under Oliver’s skin. He did need the job and had to take it seriously, even when it meant being the dipshit manager chewing out a man four or five years his senior. He earned $18 an hour (plus tips when he wasn’t doing admin work), had debts to pay off, and couldn't expect to get any help from his family.
The important thing, though, the part I distinctly remember, was that Oliver was looking at a video of a wading bird Austin had recorded. An egret, maybe. White feathers, long black legs, pointy black beak. Austin must have been standing on a ledge above a creek, because he had an overhead view of the bird as it stood in the water, slowly and deliberately stretching and retracting its neck, eyeing the wriggling little shadows below. As far as the fish could know, they were swimming around a pair of reeds growing out of the silt. The predator from which they extended was of a world beyond their understanding and out of their reach.
The video ended. Oliver moved on to the next item: a photograph of the bird from the same perspective, with a fish clamped in its beak. Water droplets flung from the victim's thrashing tail caught the sunlight. And I remember now, I clearly remember, the shapes of like twelve other fish stupidly milling about the bird's feet, unperturbed and unpanicked.
Danny peered at Oliver’s phone and observed a resemblance between the bird—its shape and bearing, and the composition of the photograph—and a POV porn video shot from behind and above, and he told us so. Elaborately. He made squawking noises.
“And mom says I’m a degenerate,” Oliver sighed. “Can you practice your interspecies pickup artist shit somewhere else?” Oliver flicked his wrist, shooing Danny off, and held his phone in front of his face to signal that he was done talking.
Danny sagged a little on his stool and turned away. I sometimes felt bad for him. For all his faults, he had the heart of a puppy dog. He really did think of us as his tribe. There was nobody else who’d only ever answer “yes” when you asked him to pick up a shift, and he did it completely out of loyalty.
He was turning 29 in a week. I wondered how many people would actually turn out to celebrate with him at the Black Taxi. Kyle probably would—but even he regarded Danny more as a source of vulgar entertainment than a friend.
Then it happened again. When I turned to speak to Oliver, there’d been a pair of pool cues leaning side-by-side against the wall a few stools down. Now they were gone.
This time it might have been my imagination. Somebody passing by could have casually snatched them up and kept walking.
But a moment later I seemed to notice a second TouchTunes box protruding from the wall directly behind me. I let it be.
Marina returned from the bathroom. Danny rose and offered her back her seat with an exaggerated bow. Before she got settled, I asked if she’d like to step outside with me. She withdrew her pack of Marlboro Menthols from her canvas bag, which she left sitting on the stool to deter Danny from sitting back down.
Marina never minded letting me bum cigarettes from time to time. I couldn’t buy them for myself anymore; it’s a habit I could never keep under control, and was only getting more expensive. Like everything else in the world. About once a month I reimbursed her by buying her a pack.
The air out on the sidewalk was as hot as the air inside Twenty, but easier to breathe. After lighting up, Marina leaned against the bricks and sighed.
“I wish Oliver would fire Danny already and get it over with.”
I nodded. Marina rarely talked about anything but work.
“He sneaks drinks and doesn't think anyone notices he's buzzed,” she went on. “He steals so much shit and isn’t even a little subtle about it. He’s going to get Oliver in trouble. And he’s a creep.”
“Yeah,” I said. These were her usual complaints about Danny, and they were all true. “At least he’s better than Austin.”
“That’s a low bar.”
Three dirt bikes and an ATV roared down the lonely street, charging through stop sign after stop sign, putting our talk on hold.
“Remind me. You’ve got one semester left, right?” I asked after the noise ebbed.
“Yep.”
Marina was a marketing major at Temple. She’d had an internship during the spring semester, and her boss told her to give her a call the very minute she graduated. Her parents in central Pennsylvania couldn’t pay her rent or tuition for her, so she was a full-time student and a full-time employee at Avenue Brew. Her emotional spectrum ranged from "tired" to "over it." She’d been waiting tables and working at coffee shops since she was seventeen, had no intention of continuing for even a day longer than she had to, and feared the escape hatch would slam shut if she dallied too long after prying it open.
She’d considered majoring in English, like Kyle. She went for marketing instead. I couldn’t blame her.
“Are you okay?” she asked. “You’ve been kind of off all day.”
“I’m terrible.”
“Why?”
I gave dodgy answers, but she asked precisely the right follow-up questions to get me going about what happened with Heather the night before.
It was the new job. Before the pandemic, Heather worked as a server at a Center City bar and grill. (That's where I met her; we were coworkers for about a year, and then I left to work Café Chakra because it was quieter and closer to where I lived.) When the place closed its doors and laid everyone off during the lockdown, she got a stopgap job at the Acme on Passyunk, and hated it. Then in March, she found a bar-and-lounge gig in a ritzy hotel on Broad Street. Very corporate. Excellent pay, great benefits. Definitely a step up. But her new employers made Irene and Jeremy look like Bob and Linda Belcher by comparison. It was the kind of place where someone had recently gotten herself fired for leaving work to rush to the hospital after getting the news that her grandmother was about to be taken off life support, and not finding someone to come in and cover the last two hours of her shift.
Heather seldom worked fewer than fifty-five hours a week, and her schedule was even more erratic than mine. At least once a week she left the hotel at 1:00 or 2:00 AM and returned at 9:00 the next morning. Neither of us could remember the last time she’d had two consecutive days off, and it had been over a month since one of mine overlapped with one of hers. She’d spent it drinking alone at home. All she wanted was some privacy.
I’d biked to South Philly to meet her when she got home at 1:30. The argument that killed our relationship for good began around 2:30, when I complained that we never had sex anymore. Heather accused me of only caring about that, when she was so exhausted and stressed that her hair was falling out in the shower. Quit the job? She couldn’t quit. The money was too good. She had student loans, medical bills, and credit card debt, and for the first time in her life she could imagine paying it all off before hitting menopause.
So, yeah, I was cranky about our sex life being dead in the water. Say whatever you like. But at that point, what were we to each other? We did nothing together anymore but complain about work before one or both of us fell asleep. That isn’t a relationship.
She said my hair always smelled like sandwiches, even after bathing, and she was done pretending it didn’t turn her off. I told her she was one to talk—she always reeked of liquor. As things escalated, we stopped caring if her roommates heard us. “You want to be a father?” she shouted around 4:00 AM. “Making what you make? That poor fucking kid.”
We fought until sunrise, and I left her apartment with the understanding that I wouldn’t be coming back, wouldn’t be calling her ever again. I biked home and sat on the steps facing the cement panel that was my house’s backyard. After my phone died and I couldn’t anaesthetize myself with dumb YouTube videos or make myself feel crazy staring at the download button for the Tinder app, I watched the sparrows hopping on and off the utility lines for a while.
At 11:40 I went inside. One of my roommates was already in the shower, so the best I could do was put on a clean Avenue Brew T-shirt before walking to the shop and clocking in at noon to help deal with the lunch rush.
“That’s a lot,” Marina finally said. “Sorry.”
I don’t know what I was expecting her to say. She was sixteen years my junior, after all, and just a coworker. She didn’t need to hear any of this, and I definitely didn't need to be telling her. But who else was there to tell?
She’d already finished her cigarette. I still had a few puffs left. She went inside.
I decided to call it a night.
The second TouchTunes box was gone—naturally. Danny had taken my stool, and regarded my approach with a puckish you snooze you lose grin. I wasn’t going to say anything. I’d just pay my bill, give everyone a nod goodnight, and walk the five blocks back home.
And then Danny disappeared.
One second, he was there. The next—gone.
Danny didn’t just instantaneously vanish. Even when something happens in the blink of an eye, you can still put together something of a sequence. I saw him—I seemed to see him—falling into himself, collapsing to a point, and then to nothing.
You know how sometimes a sound is altogether inaudible unless you’re looking at the source—like when you don’t realize somebody’s whispering at you, and can then hear and understand them after they get your attention? I think that was the case here. I wouldn't have known to listen if I hadn't seen it happen. What I heard lingered for two, maybe three seconds, and wasn't any louder than a fly buzzing inside a lampshade. A tiny and impossibly distant scream, pitchshifted like a receding ambulance siren into a basso drone...
I don’t know. I don’t know for sure. I’m certain I remember a flash of red, and I have the idea of Danny’s trunk expanding, opening up as it imploded. A crimson flower, flecked white, with spooling pink stalks—and Danny’s wide-eyed face above it, drawn twisting and shrinking into its petals.
For an instant, Twenty’s interior shimmered. Not shimmered, exactly—glitched would be a better word. If you’re old enough to remember the fragmented graphics that sometimes flashed onscreen when you turned on the Nintendo without blowing on the cartridge, you’ll have an idea of what I mean. It happened much too fast, and there was too much of it to absorb. The one clear impression I could parse was the mirage of a cash register flickering upside-down above the pool table.
Not a cash register. The shape was familiar, but the texture was wrong. I think it was ribbed, sort of like a maggot. I think it glistened. Like—camo doesn’t work anymore when the wearer stops crouching behind a bush and breaks into a run. Do you get what I’m saying?
Nobody else seemed to notice. The pool balls clacked. A New Order track was playing on the TouchTunes box. A nearby argument about about Nick Sirianni continued unabated.
Finally, there was a downward rush of air—and this at least elicited a reaction from the bartender, who slapped my bill to keep it from sailing off the counter.
“Danny,” I said.
“Danny?” Kyle asked me quietly. His face had gone pale.
“Danny?” Oliver repeated in a faraway voice.
After a pause, Kyle blinked a few times. “You heard from him?”
“God forbid,” said Marina. “When he quit I was like, great, I can keep working here after all.”
“Oh, come on—”
“Kyle. Did I ever show you those texts he sent me once at three in the morning?” The color had returned to Oliver’s face.
“No, what did he say?”
Oliver tapped at his phone and turned the screen toward Kyle.
“Oh. Oh, jeez.”
“Right? Like—if you want to ask me something, ask me. You know? Don’t be weirdly accusatory about it…”
I pulled a wad of fives and ones from my pocket, threw it all onto the counter, and beelined for the exit without consideration for the people I squeezed through and shoved past on the way.
I heard Marina saying “let him go.”
I went a second consecutive night without sleep. Fortunately I wasn’t scheduled to come in the next day.
The schedule. It’s funny. Oliver was generally great at his job, and even when he wasn’t, I cut him a lot of slack because I knew Irene and Jeremy never gave him a moment’s peace. But I could never forgive him those times he waited until the weekend to make up and distribute the schedule. This was one of those weeks he didn’t get around to it until Saturday afternoon. When I found it in my inbox, Danny’s name wasn’t anywhere on it.
As far as I know, nobody who hadn’t been at Twenty that night asked what happened to him. We were a bit overstaffed as it was, and everyone probably assumed Danny was slated for the chopping block. The part-timers were, for the most part, happy to get a few additional hours.
Oliver abruptly quit around Labor Day after a final acrimonious clash with the owners. I never found out the details, and I never saw him again. Jeremy and Irene took turns minding the store while a replacement manager was sought. None of the supervisors would be pressured into taking the job; they knew from Oliver what they could expect.
About three weeks after Oliver left, I came in for my purchasing shift and found Jeremy waiting for me in the back room. I knew it was serious when he didn’t greet me with the awkward fist-bump he ordinarily required of his male employees.
“You’ve seen the numbers,” he said. Business for the summer had fallen short of expectations, it was true, and he and Irene had decided to rein in payroll expenses. My purchaser position was being eliminated. Its responsibilities would be redistributed among the supervisors and the new manager, when one was found. In the meantime, I'd be going back to the regular $11 an hour (plus tips of course) associate position full-time.
Jeremy assured me I'd be first in the running for supervisor the next time there was an opening.
I told him it was fine, I was done, and if he’d expected the courtesy of two weeks’ notice, he shouldn’t have blindsided me like that.
“Well, that’s your choice,” he answered, trying not to look pleased. His payroll problem was solving itself.
I racked up credit card debt for a few months. Applied for entry-level museum jobs that might appreciate my art history degree. Aimed for some purchasing and administrative assistant gigs, and just for the hell of it, turned in a resume for a facilitator position at an after-school art program. Got a few interviews. All of them eventually told me they’d decided to go in a different direction. I finally got hired to bartend at Hops from Underground, a microbrewery on Fairmount.
I’m still there. The money’s okay, but it fluctuates. Hours are reasonable. I’m on their high-deductible health plan. There’s a coworker I’ve been dating. Sort of dating. You know how it goes. In this line of work you get so used to people coming and going that you learn not to get too attached. I walk past Avenue Brew a few times a week, but stopped peering in through the window when I didn't recognize the people behind the counter anymore.
2023.06.03 15:30 mcfcbot [Match Thread] Manchester City vs Manchester United (FA Cup)
FA Cup
Referee: Paul Tierney, England
Venue: Wembley Stadium
Manchester City (3-2-4-1)
Coach: Pep Guardiola
Substitutes
Manchester United (4-2-3-1)
Coach: E. ten Hag
Substitutes
Events:
Match Stats:
Player Stats:
Manchester City
Manchester United
submitted by mcfcbot to MCFC [link] [comments]
Match Finished
Manchester City 2 - 1 Manchester United
Kick Off: 15:00Referee: Paul Tierney, England
Venue: Wembley Stadium
Coach: Pep Guardiola
| Pos | # | Name | Goals | Assists | Cards | Substitution |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| G | 18 | Stefan Ortega | Yellow Card(81) | |||
| D | 2 | Kyle Walker | OFF: 90 min | |||
| D | 3 | Rúben Dias | ||||
| D | 25 | Manuel Akanji | ||||
| M | 5 | John Stones | ||||
| M | 16 | Rodri | Yellow Card(90) | |||
| F | 20 | Bernardo Silva | ||||
| M | 17 | Kevin De Bruyne | 1, 51 | OFF: 76 min | ||
| M | 8 | İlkay Gündoğan | 1, 51 | |||
| F | 10 | Jack Grealish | OFF: 89 min | |||
| F | 9 | Erling Haaland |
| Pos | # | Name | Goals | Assists | Cards | Substitution |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| G | 31 | Ederson | ||||
| D | 82 | Rico Lewis | ||||
| D | 6 | Nathan Aké | ON: 89 min | |||
| D | 14 | Aymeric Laporte | ON: 90 min | |||
| M | 80 | Cole Palmer | ||||
| M | 4 | Kalvin Phillips | ||||
| F | 19 | Julián Álvarez | ||||
| M | 47 | Phil Foden | ON: 76 min | |||
| F | 26 | Riyad Mahrez |
Coach: E. ten Hag
| Pos | # | Name | Goals | Assists | Cards | Substitution |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| G | 1 | David De Gea | ||||
| D | 29 | Aaron Wan-Bissaka | Yellow Card(45) | |||
| D | 19 | Raphaël Varane | ||||
| D | 2 | Victor Lindelöf | OFF: 83 min | |||
| D | 23 | Luke Shaw | ||||
| M | 18 | Casemiro | ||||
| M | 17 | Fred | Yellow Card(79) | |||
| M | 8 | Bruno Fernandes | 33(P) | |||
| M | 14 | Christian Eriksen | OFF: 62 min | |||
| M | 25 | Jadon Sancho | OFF: 78 min | |||
| F | 10 | Marcus Rashford |
| Pos | # | Name | Goals | Assists | Cards | Substitution |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| F | 49 | Alejandro Garnacho | ON: 62 min | |||
| G | 31 | Jack Butland | ||||
| D | 20 | Diogo Dalot | ||||
| D | 12 | Tyrell Malacia | ||||
| D | 5 | Harry Maguire | ||||
| M | 39 | Scott McTominay | ON: 83 min | |||
| M | 28 | Facundo Pellistri | ||||
| F | 36 | Anthony Elanga | ||||
| F | 27 | Wout Weghorst | ON: 78 min |
| Manchester City | Time | Manchester United |
|---|---|---|
| GOAL (I. Gundogan, K. De Bruyne assist) | 1 | |
| 33 | GOAL (B. Fernandes PEN) | |
| 45+4 | YELLOW CARD (A. Wan-Bissaka) | |
| GOAL (I. Gundogan, K. De Bruyne assist) | 51 | |
| 62 | SUB (C. Eriksen OFF, A. Garnacho ON) | |
| SUB (K. De Bruyne OFF, P. Foden ON) | 76 | |
| 78 | SUB (J. Sancho OFF, W. Weghorst ON) | |
| 79 | YELLOW CARD (Fred) | |
| YELLOW CARD (S. Ortega) | 81 | |
| 83 | SUB (V. Lindelof OFF, S. McTominay ON) | |
| SUB (J. Grealish OFF, N. Ake ON) | 89 | |
| YELLOW CARD (Rodri) | 90 | |
| SUB (K. Walker OFF, A. Laporte ON) | 90+5 |
| Manchester City | Manchester United | |
|---|---|---|
| 5 | Shots on Goal | 3 |
| 6 | Shots off Goal | 4 |
| 11 | Total Shots | 13 |
| None | Blocked Shots | 6 |
| 5 | Shots insidebox | 9 |
| 6 | Shots outsidebox | 4 |
| 12 | Fouls | 11 |
| 2 | Corner Kicks | 3 |
| 1 | Offsides | 3 |
| 60% | Ball Possession | 40% |
| 2 | Yellow Cards | 2 |
| None | Red Cards | None |
| 1 | Goalkeeper Saves | 3 |
| 512 | Total passes | 336 |
| 447 | Passes accurate | 265 |
| 87% | Passes % | 79% |
| None | expected_goals | None |
Manchester City
| player | mins | rating | goals | assists | shots (on) | passes | key passes | tackles | blocks & interceptions | duels (won) | dribbles (success) | fouled | fouls | offsides | saves |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Stefan Ortega | 94 | 6.3 | - | - | - (-) | 42 | - | - | -/- | - (-) | - (-) | - | - | - | 1 |
| Kyle Walker | 94 | 6.6 | - | - | - (-) | 62 | - | 2 | -/1 | 5 (3) | - (-) | 1 | 1 | - | - |
| Rúben Dias | 94 | 7 | - | - | - (-) | 81 | - | 2 | -/- | 4 (3) | - (-) | - | - | - | - |
| Manuel Akanji | 94 | 6.7 | - | - | - (-) | 55 | - | - | -/- | 4 (2) | 1 (-) | - | 1 | - | - |
| John Stones | 94 | 7.2 | - | - | 1 (-) | 41 | - | 2 | 2/- | 4 (4) | - (-) | 1 | - | - | - |
| Rodri | 94 | 7.6 | - | - | 1 (-) | 70 | 3 | 5 | 1/1 | 14 (7) | 3 (1) | - | 2 | - | - |
| Bernardo Silva | 94 | 7 | - | - | 1 (-) | 44 | 1 | 2 | -/1 | 10 (4) | 1 (1) | - | 2 | - | - |
| Kevin De Bruyne | 76 | 7.9 | - | 2 | 2 (1) | 29 | 3 | 1 | -/- | 10 (5) | 2 (2) | 2 | 1 | - | - |
| İlkay Gündoğan (C) | 94 | 8.6 | 2 | - | 2 (2) | 46 | 2 | 1 | 1/- | 5 (2) | - (-) | - | - | 1 | - |
| Jack Grealish | 89 | 6.9 | - | - | 1 (-) | 21 | 1 | 2 | 1/- | 13 (8) | 2 (1) | 3 | 4 | - | - |
| Erling Haaland | 94 | 6.6 | - | - | 3 (2) | 15 | - | 1 | 1/- | 12 (6) | - (-) | 2 | - | - | - |
| Phil Foden (SUB) | 18 | 6.7 | - | - | - (-) | 6 | - | 1 | -/- | 3 (2) | - (-) | 1 | 1 | - | - |
| Nathan Aké (SUB) | 5 | - | - | - | - (-) | - | - | - | -/- | - (-) | - (-) | - | - | - | - |
| player | mins | rating | goals | assists | shots (on) | passes | key passes | tackles | blocks & interceptions | duels (won) | dribbles (success) | fouled | fouls | offsides | saves |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| David De Gea | 94 | 6.2 | - | - | - (-) | 35 | - | - | -/- | - (-) | - (-) | - | - | - | 3 |
| Aaron Wan-Bissaka | 94 | 6 | - | - | - (-) | 27 | - | - | -/2 | 8 (2) | 1 (1) | 1 | 1 | - | - |
| Raphaël Varane | 94 | 6.6 | - | - | 2 (1) | 31 | - | 1 | -/- | 4 (3) | - (-) | 1 | 1 | - | - |
| Victor Lindelöf | 83 | 6.3 | - | - | - (-) | 40 | - | - | -/- | 5 (4) | - (-) | - | - | - | - |
| Luke Shaw | 94 | 6.7 | - | - | - (-) | 31 | - | 1 | -/- | 8 (7) | 2 (2) | 2 | - | - | - |
| Casemiro | 94 | 6.9 | - | - | - (-) | 32 | 2 | 2 | -/1 | 9 (5) | 1 (1) | 1 | 1 | - | - |
| Fred | 94 | 6.2 | - | - | - (-) | 26 | 1 | 2 | -/5 | 15 (3) | 1 (-) | 1 | 6 | - | - |
| Bruno Fernandes (C) | 94 | 7.2 | 1 | - | 1 (1) | 40 | 3 | 4 | -/- | 11 (5) | - (-) | 1 | 1 | - | - |
| Christian Eriksen | 62 | 6.5 | - | - | - (-) | 17 | 1 | - | -/- | 3 (1) | - (-) | - | - | - | - |
| Jadon Sancho | 78 | 6.3 | - | - | - (-) | 22 | - | 1 | -/- | 5 (2) | 2 (-) | 1 | - | 2 | - |
| Marcus Rashford | 94 | 6.5 | - | - | 2 (-) | 21 | - | - | -/- | 9 (2) | 3 (1) | 1 | 1 | - | - |
| Alejandro Garnacho (SUB) | 32 | 6.7 | - | - | 1 (-) | 7 | - | - | -/- | 4 (2) | 2 (1) | 1 | - | - | - |
| Wout Weghorst (SUB) | 16 | 6.7 | - | - | - (-) | 3 | 1 | - | -/- | 2 (1) | - (-) | - | - | 1 | - |
| Scott McTominay (SUB) | 11 | 6.9 | - | - | 1 (1) | 4 | 1 | - | -/- | - (-) | - (-) | - | - | - | - |
Match Finished
Manchester City 2 - 1 Manchester United
MCFCBot v1.12. This bot is in beta and is built by aguer0. Please get in touch with any feedback2023.06.03 15:28 SkulkingShadow Guys please we have stop criticizing these red eyes!!(idk waht flair to give this or if i can even post this)
 | they have red eyes bcs of their kill mode and are not possessed yet! just like in fnaf sister location william afton programed them to kill alone kids which includes his daughters abby and also elizabeth! and thats why they going after abby like why would souls go after abby, bruh think about it submitted by SkulkingShadow to The8BitRyanReddit [link] [comments] it is actually most accurate to the game as their endo eyes are red but by being possessed they have white dot eyes like how circus baby's eyes changed from blue to green by being possessed, and so they will have white dot eyes in the movie (most affirmative) Yall think scott would screw his long awaited movie? (which was delayed to make perfect mind you!) https://preview.redd.it/dr9x89fxzs3b1.png?width=1000&format=png&auto=webp&s=7a53dc6d9361a25d34f4cc239ea98e7fca4810fb |
2023.06.03 15:09 seannestor This Week in Toledo 6/3/23
 | submitted by seannestor to toledo [link] [comments] https://preview.redd.it/vqfgv168ys3b1.png?width=780&format=png&auto=webp&s=fe5f891d22cac511f70d30faa8cea6cf5199341b • On Monday, Bitwise Industries - the Fresno, California-based tech training company that has been renovating the former Jefferson Center downtown at 1300 Jefferson Ave. - furloughed its entire staff of 900 employees citing cash flow issues. A $33 million lawsuit has been filed against the company by its financial partners, who cite that they were misled and that contracts were breached. • On Tuesday, Toledo City Council voted 9-3 to approve a $180,000 contract with Louisville-based Cities United to develop a crime-reduction plan. Council members Hobbs, Moline, and Sarantou cast dissenting votes. • Also on Tuesday, City of Toledo Safety Director Brian Byrd announced he will be retiring on September 1. He has worked for the City since 1988. • On Wednesday, ProMedica announced that it plans to close the Goerlich Memory Center and a skilled nursing facility in Sylvania by August 31 as part of ongoing cost-cutting measures related to its dire financial position. The Goerlich Memory Center has been open since 1994. • On Thursday, the Toledo Area Regional Transit Authority (TARTA) launched its TARTA Summer Blast Pass, which allows young people aged 6 through 19 to make use of TARTA services at no cost through August 31. For more information, visit https://tarta.com/blast/ • Also beginning Thursday, ratepayers are likely to see a hike of up to 47% on their electric bills due to rising energy costs influenced by the ongoing war between Russia and Ukraine. For those interested in changing their energy supplier, the Public Utilities Commission of Ohio (PUCO) operates a website comparing all available energy providers at http://www.energychoiceohio.gov/ • The Ohio Department of Transportation has reintroduced plans to expand I-475 between Douglas Road and US-23. Several residents are concerned as the project will involve acquiring and demolishing homes as early as 2026. • The Ohio Controlling Board has earmarked $2,000,000 for cleanup in the Maumee River as well as $750,000 to Unison Behavioral Health Group to purchase a 16-bed residential treatment facility for those with severe and persistent mental illness. • On Saturday (June 3) from 8 a.m. to 1 p.m., the City of Toledo is sponsoring a free disposal day at the Hoffman Road Landfill (3962 Hoffman Rd.) Lucas county residents can drop off bulk solid waste at no cost during this time. For more information, visit https://toledo.oh.gov/landfill • Also on Saturday (June 3) at 10 a.m. in the Old West End, the King Wamba Parade will kick off the 50th Annual Old West End Festival. For more information about the festival and the various events and activities taking place within it, visit http://www.toledooldwestend.com/festival • In further Saturday (June 3) events, from 11 a.m. to 1 p.m. the City of Toledo will host another public meeting at St. Martin de Porres Community Center (1119 Bancroft St.) for stakeholders to plan future development at the Swayne Field Shopping Center at Monroe Street and Detroit Avenue. • The East Toledo Family Center will host a Storybook Festival on Saturday (June 3) from 11 a.m. to 2 p.,. at Waite High School (301 Morrison Dr.). The entirely free event will include activities, raffles, a meet and greet with Spiderman, music, and prizes to promote literacy for children. • The Multicultural Twilight Market will take place on Saturday (June 3) from 6 p.m. to 10 p.m. at the Toledo Farmer's Market (525 Market St.). Shops operated by women, immigrants, and people of color will be present. There is no cost to attend. • Next Wednesday (June 7) at 12 p.m., the Toledo-Lucas County Public Library will launch its free Summer Music Series with a performance by Kerry Patrick Clark & Robbie Clark on the north lawn of the Main Branch Library (325 N. Michigan St.). Concerts will continue every Wednesday at 12 p.m. through August 8. • Also next Wednesday (June 7) from 6 p.m. to 7 p.m., City of Toledo District 1 Councilman John Hobbs will host a public town hall meeting at the Eleanor Kahle Senior Center (1315 Hillcrest Ave.). For more information, call 419-245-1611. • Next Thursday (June 8) from 11:30 a.m. to 1:30 p.m., the 18th annual Lunch at Levis series will kick off at Levis Square Park (St. Clair St. and Madison Ave.) in downtown Toledo with a free concert by Kyle White. Each Thursday through September 21, free music, food trucks, and activities will be present at the park. • You can receive This Week in Toledo via e-mail by subscribing at https://toledo.substack.com/subscribe. You can also receive updates on Facebook by liking the official page at https://www.facebook.com/thisweekintoledo. News sources: The Blade, 13ABC |
2023.06.03 15:09 mariussa1 750+ FINDS PANDABUY SPREADSHEET WITH QC PHOTOS!!
https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/12dXJcMY6bs8oqn_cH-zvSglHZ6Ee8DwGm86vFNoEih4/edit?usp=sharing
For the last couple of months I have been collecting over 750+ of the best Pandabuy finds into a comprehensive spreadsheet! Each item in the spreadsheet has QC photos and prices listed in both CNY and USD! I will regularly update the spreadsheet to include new finds and replace out-of-stock items! So please bookmark this spreadsheet!
I've categorized the finds, making it incredibly easy to navigate and find precisely what you're looking for. Items are categorized like this: SHOES, HOODIES/SWEATERS, T-SHIRTS, JACKETS, PANTS/SHORTS, HATS/HEADWEAR, ACCESSORIES, OTHER STUFF
Items/brands featured are: Nike, Air Jordan 1, 4, 11, Dunk Low, Lobster, Air Force 1, Air Max, Vapormax, Bape, Bapesta, Yeezy 350, Slides, New Balance, Rick Owens, Balenciaga, Triple S, Defender, Track, Pollex Crocs, Kapital, Mastermind, Palace, Sicko Pain, Travis Scott, Broken Planet Market, Revenge, Stussy, CPFM, Supreme, True Religion, Trapstar, Essentials, Fear of God, FOG, Gallery Dept, Playboi Carti, Vivienne Westwood, Kids See Ghosts, GAP, Golf Wang, Sp5der, Chrome Hearts, Drake, Vuja De, Vetements, Far-Archive, Off-White, Divide The Youth, Joy Divizn, Hellstar, The North Face, Kaws, Burberry, Represent, Polo Ralph Lauren, Vlone, Los Pollos Hermanos, Better Call Saul, Kanye West, Metro Boomin, A$AP Rocky, Neon Genesis, JoJo's Bizarre Adventure, Ken Carson, Aphex Twin, American Psycho, Anti Social Club, Palm Angels, Stone Island, Football Jerseys, Basketball, Goth Money Records, Bladee, Drain Gang, Moncler, Corvidae, RAF Simons, Dior, F1, Prada, Candada Goose, Carhartt, Lacoste, Denham, Rhude, Gucci, Eric Emanuel, Minus Two, RMC Jeans, No Faith Studios, Polar Skate Big Boy, Dime, Calvin Klein, NBA, Yeat, CP Company, Balaclava, Durag, Tyler The Creator, Saint Michael, Amiri, Goyard, Louis Vuiton, B.B Simon, Belts, Pit Viper, McDonalds, Alyx, MF DOOM, Gundam, Pokémon, Breaking Bad, Lego, Dragon Ball Z, Star Wars, Ninjago, Marvel, iPhone, Takashi Murakami, Tech Deck, Disney, Death Note, Among Us, Minecraft, South Park, Beyblade, Kontrol Freek, Ice Spice
submitted by mariussa1 to PandabuyNorway [link] [comments]
For the last couple of months I have been collecting over 750+ of the best Pandabuy finds into a comprehensive spreadsheet! Each item in the spreadsheet has QC photos and prices listed in both CNY and USD! I will regularly update the spreadsheet to include new finds and replace out-of-stock items! So please bookmark this spreadsheet!
I've categorized the finds, making it incredibly easy to navigate and find precisely what you're looking for. Items are categorized like this: SHOES, HOODIES/SWEATERS, T-SHIRTS, JACKETS, PANTS/SHORTS, HATS/HEADWEAR, ACCESSORIES, OTHER STUFF
Items/brands featured are: Nike, Air Jordan 1, 4, 11, Dunk Low, Lobster, Air Force 1, Air Max, Vapormax, Bape, Bapesta, Yeezy 350, Slides, New Balance, Rick Owens, Balenciaga, Triple S, Defender, Track, Pollex Crocs, Kapital, Mastermind, Palace, Sicko Pain, Travis Scott, Broken Planet Market, Revenge, Stussy, CPFM, Supreme, True Religion, Trapstar, Essentials, Fear of God, FOG, Gallery Dept, Playboi Carti, Vivienne Westwood, Kids See Ghosts, GAP, Golf Wang, Sp5der, Chrome Hearts, Drake, Vuja De, Vetements, Far-Archive, Off-White, Divide The Youth, Joy Divizn, Hellstar, The North Face, Kaws, Burberry, Represent, Polo Ralph Lauren, Vlone, Los Pollos Hermanos, Better Call Saul, Kanye West, Metro Boomin, A$AP Rocky, Neon Genesis, JoJo's Bizarre Adventure, Ken Carson, Aphex Twin, American Psycho, Anti Social Club, Palm Angels, Stone Island, Football Jerseys, Basketball, Goth Money Records, Bladee, Drain Gang, Moncler, Corvidae, RAF Simons, Dior, F1, Prada, Candada Goose, Carhartt, Lacoste, Denham, Rhude, Gucci, Eric Emanuel, Minus Two, RMC Jeans, No Faith Studios, Polar Skate Big Boy, Dime, Calvin Klein, NBA, Yeat, CP Company, Balaclava, Durag, Tyler The Creator, Saint Michael, Amiri, Goyard, Louis Vuiton, B.B Simon, Belts, Pit Viper, McDonalds, Alyx, MF DOOM, Gundam, Pokémon, Breaking Bad, Lego, Dragon Ball Z, Star Wars, Ninjago, Marvel, iPhone, Takashi Murakami, Tech Deck, Disney, Death Note, Among Us, Minecraft, South Park, Beyblade, Kontrol Freek, Ice Spice